HAPPIER
ABROAD Why
Dating, Social Life and Mental Health are Better Beyond America
Propaganda vs. Real Life in America
“America is a country
that is built for doing business, not living life.“ –
an Asian American intellectual in Europe
As we all know, the media propaganda image in America
is that our country is a land of freedom and opportunity where anyone can be
what they want to be, live their dreams, be the best they can be, become rich
and successful, and live the American dream of owning a home. This idea
is incessantly conveyed by our culture, media, education system, and political
establishment. It is a necessary illusion to keep everyone functioning in
their place. And we are selectively fed success stories of individuals
who thrive here rather than of those who don’t.
However, despite this image, here's the big picture
about how things work in America and how people live.
The reality is that in America,
only a few people truly live the American dream. Those at the top who
control the flow of economic resources and production capital (in socialist
philosophy terms, they are referred to as the “haute bourgeoisie” class) are
also the ones who get most of the resource flow even though they don't need
it. And it's not just with the CEO's. The top sports players and
top Hollywood stars in this country who get 20
million dollars per film or per season are easily getting extraordinary amounts
of money that they don't even need. That's how things have always worked,
especially in a capitalist country. Karl Marx’s prediction that
capitalism would fail might have came true if a middle class hadn't been
created in this country to act as a buffer between the upper and lower classes,
stabilizing the system, giving the low class an incentive to move up higher so
they don't overthrow the elite. (Some intellectual historians have even argued
that colleges and universities were created to create a middle class. e.g.
Zinn, Chomsky)
In reality, the majority of people in this country
live in slavery to their jobs just so they can keep up with never-ending bills
and make ends meet. They never live the American dream. And the
myth of “individual freedom” for all in America is just that, a
myth, perpetuated to appease and motivate the masses of people, making each
person feel important. Most people in America work at least 8 hours a day
at a full time job, and what little time is left at the end of the day is spent
at home with their families, making dinner, getting children ready for bed, and
then going to bed to start the next day the same way again. There
isn't really enough time for people to develop themselves intellectually or
spiritually.
In fact, here is what the typical life of the typical
married stable man in America
is like, as I would describe it:
The ideal life of the typical married stable American
man:
“He has a wife, some kids, a mortgaged house, two cars
or SUV’s, many bills to pay, and a stable job to support all of it. Each
morning, he and his wife get up, get the kids ready for school, make coffee,
and then they both go to work (or at least he does). After a 8-9 hour
workday, he comes home and tries to relax in front of the TV, but often has
very little time to do so, because he might have to help make dinner, talk to
his wife and kids (which usually consists of clicheish pep talk around the
dinner table), help do household chores, help the kids with their homework, get
the kids ready for bed, and then go to bed himself, often still
exhausted. The next day, the same routine simply starts all over
again.
On weekends, he gets a little more freedom, but not by
much. Instead, he has to spend a large part of the weekend catching up on
household chores, cleaning the house, or doing yard work. If he can
manage to do a family outing, it is often too stressful to enjoy. Not
only does he have to constantly watch and discipline the kids from getting out
of hand, but he has to think about his budget for the family outing, driving
and planning where to go, humoring the kids, lecturing them and giving them
clicheish pep talk, making sure his wife is pleased with the outing too, and
making sure they get back home in time before the kids’ bedtime. That’s
why these family outings are usually exhausting and more stressful than
fun.
Sometimes, he and his wife also go out to social
events sponsored by schools, companies, churches or the community. But
even then, these events tend to be rigid, routine, dull and clicheish. In
addition, around the people at these events, he puts on a contrived pleasant
face to be polite, regardless of whether he likes them or not, and others at
the events do the same to him as well. People at these events don’t
deeply enjoy them. Instead, they simply pretend to. Deep down, they
know it is just a light distraction from the routine monotony of their daily
lives.
In the background of all this are the constant
pressures and demands of the bills he has to keep up with as well as the
savings he has to allocate. He has to deal with the big house mortgage
payments, utility bills, taxes, car insurance payments, medical insurance bills
(unless his company pays all or most of it), food and gas expenditures, credit
card bills, entertainment/luxury item expenditures, the needs and wants of his
kids and wife, etc. In addition to all this, he has to also try to save
up some money for his retirement or his kids’ college fund.
Each day that goes by, each week, each month, each
year, etc. is pretty much like the above. That’s life for him.
Eventually, he may start asking himself “Is this what life is all about?
Is this all there is?” Then he may start feeling like a robot leadin
chanized life with no freedom. Not only is he a slave to his company, but
he is a slave to his wife, kids, house, cars and bills as well. Sadly he
learns that there is no true freedom in all this. Not only is this life
routine and stressful, but mind-numbing as well. Eventually, he may start
to long for the life he had before when he was single and could do whatever he
wanted without his current stresses that enslave him. He may long for the
time when he was young and single and could choose from many paths in life
without anyone tying him down, as well as his freedom to pursue or love
conquests with new and exciting women. He may still love his wife and
have affection for her, but the romance and passion may be long gone, and they
stay together simply for financial commitments and for the sake of the
kids. In fact, he may even start to envy the life of the traveling
backpackers to overseas countries who, although are poor and on a budget,
nevertheless live a life of adventure and mind-expanding freedom.
To cope with this mind numbing routine and stress, he
may find ways to distract himself. He may seek acceptable forms of escape
such as becoming a sports fan and watching football, baseball, or
basketball. These spectator sports provide a temporary distraction from
his inner emptiness. Or he may develop other hobbies such as reading, or
becoming a handyman on cars and houses (like Tim Allen does on the sitcom Home
Improvement). And of course, he must constantly convince himself that his
life has meaning because he is doing what God and his country told him he is
supposed to do by raising a family, and that it is all for the good of his kids
and wife who are depending on him. No matter how dull, stressful, or mind
numbing his life is, that’s what he has got to tell himself every day in order
to tolerate and endure his conditions.”
The above is a sad grim picture but this is the case
with many American males, and this is all underreported by our media of
course. Some may find this routine lifestyle comfortable, but others
loathe it because they realize that their minds and souls will never be
expanded by it, but instead contracted into robotic conformity without
freedom.
Even some American women and suburban soccer moms
living the American dream feel the same way, as in the case of this lady who
wrote me:
“Dear
Winston:
I
have never responded to a blog before or whatever they are called. I
found your essay about american consumerism on planet essay and was inspired to
write to you.
As
I read your essay I felt like you were telling my story, except that I am a 40
year old female living in Malibu
with a husband and two kids. Sounds nice right? Many days I
feel like I am living a life of a prisoner. In my twenties I
lived in Italy, France, and
Belguim. I have been to Switzerland,
Austria, Germany, spain,
Turkey, Russia, Indonesia,
and Luxembourg.
I felt so alive, so free. Now what? My life
is exactly like you described in your essay. I feel stuck.
I am a full time mom with a nanny to help. I have read every
spiritual book out. All I seem to do is long for my twenties. My
husband is all about materialism and staying at 5 star hotels (many days I just
feel suffocated by our marriage). I long for the way I used to be.
I feel as though I have gone to the point of no return because I have children
who rely on me.
Do
you have any advice?”
(My
response: Not really,
unfortunately. You just have to find
every opportunity you can to do what you love and try to maintain a healthy
balance between your other priorities, as well as a workable compromise. In the meantime, you can try to live
vicariously through people like me :))
Our “culture” is completely based on HYPE and
CONSUMERISM along with EXCESS CONSUMPTION.
Life is all about what you can BUY next.
And that’s why mainstream Americans do not seem as evolved or
enlightened as mainstream Europeans for example, to put it bluntly (no offense
to anyone intended). Europeans in general obviously have a lot more soul
and intellect than average Americans, particularly among the young
population.
In reality, there are few redeeming qualities to
living in America
other than making money and consuming.
Besides that, the rest is mostly fake and artificial. This is well known to many foreigners,
immigrants and even some Americans. In
fact, here are their real life opinions, which are quite common, but in the
world of the US
media of course, they don’t exist.
First, a Russian girl from Moscow
had this to say about moving to the USA:
“To be honest i don't like
usa
at all, i can move there but only if it is strongly needed (if i fall for an
american). Many of my friends was there(with families or for student exchange
Work&travel usa)
and say something similar to: "they have no culture, but the money...
money and nothing more is interesting for them", Doesnt sound inspiring..”
Next, an Asian American reader gave this conclusion of
life in America:
“Winston,
Interesting to read your writing on America....after
20 years living on the US,
I gradually have come to a similar conclusion. Now I tend to see US as
an extremely luxury prison, and experience life here as a shell,
hollow with little content except if your life is all about making
money or being fully committed to a career...
Regards,
*** ****
NJ”
Interestingly enough, a Russian immigrant who read an
earlier version of this treatise, had a bout with self-condemnation before he
becoming enlightened:
“Anyway, to cut a long story short,
everything you wrote in your treatise is precisely to the point. I am a Russian
who has lived in the States long enough to know. I came to the country
expecting to find some flavor, as I had been able to do in France and Germany. Alas, what I ran
into was a sea of blandness.
I took me a while to realize that there was a chasm of difference between the
media picture of America
and real life, but when the truth hit home, I felt very disappointed and empty.
I even had a lapse of self-condemnation as I thought the problem was in me. I
have gotten over it now and can see clearly. Your writing puts all the pieces
of the puzzle together very well.”
And an African American man on my list vociferated:
“You can tell most people in other parts
of the world are more cultured and morally more disciplined than most
Americans. Most Americans think possessing material wealth is being cultured,
and that they are socially more superior than other races…What an ILLUSION in
their mind!!... They unfortunately so believe their illusions they fail to
realize they are dead WRONG! North America is
good to live in if you like to acquire material wealth period! And that is good
provided you do not loose your morals of human compassion and relations.”
Similarly, a Russian American male immigrant I know
had this to say in response to my observation that US women are the least
friendly to strangers and the most paranoid in the world.
“Hey Winston.
It is good you noticed the difference. But it is not only women it is all
americans are very different. Americans have empty eyes. Even those
people on TV. Because there is no soul in this country only money.“
Back in college, a Greek friend used to often tell
me:
“Americans have no inner
life. All they do is consume!”
Suffice to say, an “inner life” isn’t something that
can be quantified or described with mere words.
Those who have it know what it is.
And those who don’t have one, can’t see one with a mere description.
Perceptions like in the above are a lot more common
than you might think. I’ve heard many such views from US immigrants,
foreigners, and Europeans. In fact, I’d estimate that about 80 to 90
percent of Europeans feel that way about our lifestyle.
You might wonder why if so many immigrants in the US
have such opinions, that they stay. Well
the explanation is sad and simple.
Humans have a propensity to get into a “comfort zone” even when they
don’t like where they live, don’t fit into the culture, or become enlightened
about it. If you have a daily routine
set up, as long as there are some benefits of convenience, it’s easier to do
nothing and just maintain it, than to make drastic changes to your life which
could entail starting your life over from scratch. And of course, where one lives usually brings
obligations into one’s life that are hard to break due to the aforementioned
reasons. In addition, the immigrants
often have family members (e.g. their children, spouses, or parents) who are
settled in the US
that further tie them there. So you see,
the “if you don’t like it, then leave” mantra is much easier said than done.
In America, people judge their lives
by their career status. On the other hand, Europeans judge their lives by
the richness and variety of experiences they’ve had, as well as their inner
life. (I tend to share the mentality of the latter of course.)
In some European countries, in work situations you get
2 hour lunch breaks and 6 hour work days, ending around 4pm or so. And you get a LOT
more time off throughout the year. Health insurance is also free.
Also, it is less anal. In the Middle East, I heard that you would almost have to commit
a felon to be fired (in contrast to how American companies fire people easily
for any reason, often just for “bad chemistry” with the management or
difference of style). And even if you didn't show up for work, all they
would do is dock your pay. You could come back later and have your job
back.
The obsession with work in America is so strong that
you don't even get the kind of holidays you get in the rest of the world.
For instance, for New Year's, the rest of the world gets 7 to 10 days off for
their holiday. But in the USA, you get either one day off, or
none at all (e.g. if New Year's Day falls on a weekend, oftentimes you get no
days off). The US
economy hates holidays because they are too costly, resulting in huge losses of
profit, which it considers to be more important than allowing people time for
themselves. Most employees, if they have a decent job, only get a week or
two paid vacation a year.
The fear of being poor in America is also unusually
strong, contributing to the obsession of career and making money. And perhaps because the consequences of being
poor in the US are far
worse than in Europe, as one Dutchman
observed:
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=371485
“What I have noticed as a difference between the USA and the Netherlands, though, is
that people need to size one another up for the economical gain they can
bring each other. Rich people in the USA
are very rich, but poor people are much poorer then in the Netherlands. Poor people in
the USA
often have to work several jobs, and so they have neither time (for making
friends), money nor social standing. Plus they see rich people around them all
the time, plus they live in a culture that blames them for being poor. Poor
people in the Netherlands
have either time (if they're unemployed) or they have money. And having money
in the Netherlands
is far less of a requisite for social standing then in the USA. In short, being poor
in the USA is much,
much worse then being poor in the Netherlands.
Add to that that it is far easier to really hit rock bottom in the USA.
And rock bottom is really hard there. And bare. And the flipside of the
American Dream is that everyone can hit Rock Bottom, anytime. All it takes is a
stroke of bad luck. So people feel the necessity, both for themselves and their
families, not to let resources slip away, by spending time with people who
can't offer about the same level of support they can offer them.
Another aspect is that Americans just work damned hard, long hours. They need
to, to make the money it takes to live up to a certain material standard. They
have precious little time with their families as it is. Far less time then is
standard in most countries in Europe. European
countries have their shorter distances and shorter commutes. More holidays.
Competition is less fierce, so less of it trickles down to employees, who can
get by with having to make less overtime and less unpaid-I'm-proving-myself
extra effort.”
Now, America may be a country founded on
great ideals and principles about democracy and freedom. But the way people actually live in America
is quite different. Most people spend most of their time in cars, houses,
and corporate buildings. They have no time or interest in cultivating
their soul or intellect. And the few who do cultivate their souls or
intellect are seen as geeky and nonconformist by the majority of adherents to
the system.
When our society constantly perpetuates excess consumption and material
desires with hype, our general focus becomes on the outward rather than the
inward. People are judged based on what they have, which creates their
status. As a result, we lose touch with
our inner selves, have no true self-confidence/self-esteem, and therefore have
fragile egos dependent on outer things and material possessions. It’s no
wonder then that in general, I notice that people abroad have richer and
refined inner lives than Americans.
In the US,
most people see life only in terms of making money, buying things, and surface
practicalities. There is no spiritual or
intellectual dimension in their lives, and no “inner life.”
When one has no inner life and totally depends on the
outer, as most Americans do, then when things in the outer life go wrong or become
stagnant, one becomes disrupted as well. Such a person is vulnerable, a
victim of circumstance with no inner foundation to rely on. As a result, one is left to having to resort
to feigning outward happiness, rather than have true inward happiness.
I’ve heard it said that there seems to be an inverse relationship between inner
happiness and material assets. In fact, according to studies, the country
rated with the happiest people in the world is Nigeria, which is a poor
country by materialistic standards.
Americans generally live mind-numbing lives in
mind-numbing environments (especially in suburban America) that do not
cultivate intellectual or spiritual growth. Contrary to the US
propaganda about itself, in reality the American lifestyle for the most part is
MIND-NUMBING and ISOLATING. All most people pretty much do is go to work
and watch TV at home. They have few real interests. So much for the
American lifestyle. There aren’t many experiences or interactions to
expand your mind and soul like there are in other countries. As a result,
for people like me who seek to expand their mind and soul, the American
lifestyle constantly SUFFOCATES us. Its conformist culture CONTRACTS one’s
mind and soul rather than EXPANDS it (hence those who feel suffocated by this
contraction do not feel free to be themselves in America).
And nowadays (especially in Las
Vegas) the entertainment and pleasures offered in America are mostly artificial and
commercial, rather than natural or soulful.
Instead of filling people with substance or reality,
it instills them with consumerist hype. America
is a generally stable and conformist-oriented country so its economic system is
dependent on people who rigidly conform to it. It is the kind of country
where those who can’t conform and/or are misfits are deprived of almost
everything, while those who conform well are rewarded. And differences
are treated and seen as taboo (despite our propaganda) rather than as
attractive or interesting.
In order to keep them motivated with these conditions,
people in the US
escape into TV at the end of their days. They are encouraged to go to
church (as black slave owners in the 19th century also encouraged their slaves
to go to church, using religion to give them something to live for and feel
content in their position so they wouldn't rebel), read self-help/New Age
books, go out and buy material things (sometimes on credit) that give them a
temporary fleeting sense of satisfaction, indulge in junk food, and are given
daily network media entertainment in the form of television shows that are
complete trash in quality and substance. These are all ways that our
society distracts and stimulates the majority of people so they can maintain
their meager existence in a mind-numbing consumerist society, serving the
interests of those at the top.
Many people in the country feel empty, and seek
distractions in shallow stimulation because they don't know what else to
do. Some don't even realize that they feel empty, because they just get
keep busy distracting themselves with something. And plus, you aren't supposed
to feel empty if you have a job, house, and family, which represent the ideal
life. You are supposed to be
fulfilled by being able to buy things, hence the consumerist hype-driven
culture of ours. Nevertheless, many in
the US
live a thin line from becoming depressed or mentally ill. I don’t blame
the American people themselves for this. It isn’t their fault, but rather
the system they live under. Like everyone else, they are just trying to
make the best out of their circumstances according to the system set in place.
It’s no surprise then that those who thrive on the
intellect or soul often struggle and feel alienated in mainstream America,
because the lifestyle, environment and conditions don’t cultivate such
things. Instead, they cultivate a
staunch conformist and materialistic consumerist mentality. Just look at
the general cookie-cutter architecture in America such as suburban
homes, strip malls, corporate buildings, franchise stores, etc. and you will
see that it all symbolizes and represents a conformist creed and
mentality. America
in comparison to other countries seriously lacks both culture and soul.
It’s all about hype, consumption, and conformity. Most people’s primary
interest is money and business, and their youths are wasted slaving away for
the production capital owners just so they hope to retire in their 50’s or
60’s. Also, the school system in America is designed to
prepare children to become dollar commodities, rather than helping them grow as
human beings at all. And that’s because in America, people are judged
by their productivity to the economic system.
In America, CONFORMITY is the bottom
line. It is at the root of its modern society. Not freedom or
individualism as we’ve been taught (though we perceive ourselves as
individuals), but conformity. America by the world’s standards is
a very orderly country with strict controls and planning. With so much “control”, little room is left for
freedom. The materialistic system in America from
every angle pretty much PRESSURES and DEMANDS us all into CONFORMITY. Whether it’s conformity to your school,
workplace, team, peers, friends, etc. the fundamental underlying principle in
American life, business and politics is conform, conform, conform!
Otherwise, you are in danger of feeling unaccepted and inadequate, as if you’re
not a complete person, which is what most people fear.
In the US, the whole vibe is
one of conformity to work, home routine, and shopping. There is this
insular mentality of the establishment and those indoctrinated by it
that anyone who doesn't conform to a routine or permanent job of the
"system" has mental health issues. It's as though to many,
nothing exists in the universe outside of work and education. Go to a
local employment office (I used to work in one) and that's the mentality
there, that a human is nothing but misery unless he/she has a regular job, and
that nothing else is relevant. That is f@#$ed up in my view, and
unintellectual as well.
Ironically, though mainstream Americans are
conformists to the system, they see themselves as individualistic. Such
may seem to be a discrepancy, but perhaps it depends on your reference point,
as I'm sure average Americans do not see themselves as conformists.
Instead, they see the way they "conform" to the system like zombies
as simply the way of normal real life. Perhaps their sense of
individualism is a delusion. It depends on your point of view, but one
person explained the seeming discrepancy to me like this:
“Americans are individualists
in the way they pursue goals- they do not work well in groups or pairs. They like
to do each one his own thing. So, they meet for convenience and then split each
one going his own way.
Conforming is in the way one speaks and dresses and acts. But goals are
something totally different.”
If you look at the big picture of how things are in America
and the lifestyle of mainstream people, you will see how the principle of
CONFORMITY is at the root core of almost everything we do. And that
“individual freedom” and “self-expression” is just hyped illusion that has
nothing to do with how things run here. There is very little room or
reward for true creativity or self-expression in America. As a
consequence, the environment and social conditions we live under in America
force you to adopt a conformist mentality, rather than a creative one.
There are at least several reasons for this. One, America
is one of those countries where people don’t generally like those who are
different than them (though politically, they pretend to). Two,
pragmatically, an individual alone does not have the resources or power to
really do anything, even to survive. Instead, the individual must join
and CONFORM to some type of COLLECTIVE body, organization, or group with such
resources that will support him/her in order to function or achieve anything.
One of the places where this is the most true is in
corporate America,
where conformity is the bottom line. Within corporate America, you can easily
sense and smell the vibes and energy all around that spell “conformity,
conformity, conformity”. There’s no question about it.
Unfortunately, those who can’t conform or don’t know how to, are too
individualistic or expressive, are not considered “a good fit” and consequently
thrown out to become losers with no income. In fact, it’s usually true
that those who are able to conform their wavelengths and lifestyle to an
organization or corporation have a much easier time financially and making ends
meet, while those who have problems conforming usually have constant financial
problems and face a constant uphill battle to make ends meet. Therefore,
that more than anything means that those who conform are rewarded while those
who don’t are punished in America. That’s why I say
that America
is all about conformity. And that’s why our public schools try their best
to make students conform to their system, even if it goes against the kids’
nature. It’s simply for their own good.
In fact, conformity is even more important than
honesty. And contrary to the old adage, honesty has never been the best
policy. In fact, more often than not honesty gets you into trouble and is
used against you. But conformity gets you much farther. What this
means is that being yourself can get you into trouble, but pretending to
conform gets you accepted. That is a very sad state of affairs.
Even my own dad, who has always led a very stable
life, admitted that I was right about this. In an email, he wrote:
“Dear Win,
I totally agree with this. Conformity is the key to success and acceptance in this
society, not right or wrong, not so much about being yourself, or unnecessary
honesty.
Dad”
In addition, even after conforming, in order to keep
your job, you pretty much have to center your life around it and make its needs
your top priority. The reason is pragmatically obvious. If you
don’t live and breathe your work and center your life around it, your company
will simply replace you with someone who IS willing to do that. It’s as
simple as that. In order to compete, thrive, and expand in the American
economy, the company has to have employees who are willing to live and breathe
their job. And in order to insure your long term economic stability,
you’ve got to place your company’s needs above yours. In effect, you are
forced to be a servant for your own good. That’s how it is.
Now, I don’t mean to over-generalize here. I
know that America
is a diverse place, but in the big picture of things, that is how it is.
And to make things worse, most people in America don’t like people
who are different than them which fosters the need to conform even
further. Perhaps the conformist mentality we are forced to adopt in America
contributes to a general dislike of what is different? Who knows.
But it’s especially true in California
where I grew up. There, even among the diverse populations of minorities
(whites are now a minority there, by the way), most people prefer to affiliate
and date only within their own race, making it one of the most racist places in
the world socially speaking (though not politically speaking of course).
On a related point, the few who thrive in this system
are given all the praise and glory, whereas those who don't thrive in these
conditions are PERSECUTED, directly and indirectly, in many ways. They
are made to feel inadequate, since they are compared to others who thrive, and
deprived of resources and social status. They are also told either
directly or indirectly that there is something wrong with them. It's an
unfair ungodly punishment on those who don't thrive or fit in or find a niche
in our society.
This constant psychological pressure is what makes our
egos in America
so fragile since we are constantly compared with others, forcing us to compete
with them in order to prove our worth rather than accepting and loving
ourselves as we are. That is one of the unacknowledged costs of
capitalism despite the benefits. In capitalism, there are only winners
and losers. Someone must be exploited.
It’s an inherent part of the system. And as already discussed, the
second contributor to our fragile egos is our dominant focus on outer material
wants, which causes us to lose touch with our inner selves which might
otherwise have given us a rock solid inner confidence under our egos.
This combined with our individualistic isolationist values make it even worse,
causing mental illness, loneliness, and many to be dysfunctional. Our
economic system and culture is Darwinistic in nature. Those who thrive
are rewarded, while those who don't are unfairly punished and/or persecuted,
and not because they did anything wrong. Many artists and creative
people, unfortunately, fall into this latter category.
In fact, I think that nowhere else in the world are
people who don't fit in are stripped of ego and self-worth the way they are
here (by society and culture, not by the government). It's no wonder that
we have the highest rate of mental illness in this country, and that most of
the serial killers in the world are from America too. Do you
think that’s due to pure random coincidence? I don’t think so. It’s
due in part, simply because no one country or economic system brings out the
best in everyone. Contrary to what American pro dists say about our
country being the ideal land where “all” people have a better life and can make
their dreams come true, the reality is that America brings out the worst in
some people. It’s just a fact of life and a fact of nature.
Competition is the basis of our culture and economy,
and therefore becomes our mentality as well. This means that people
either have money, or they are striving to be better than everyone else.
This competitive mentality eventually leads us to become more "stuck
up" toward others than we would otherwise be. We evaluate others in
terms of their worth, and compare ourselves to them. This creates a
rivalry mentality that leads fellow human beings in our country to see each
other as opponents or adversaries. And sadly enough, having a lot of
money and material possessions changes your attitude toward others, making you
more spoiled and "stuck up".
On the other hand, countries like Russia are accustomed to a
more socialistic system that is less individualistic and competitive in
nature. Therefore, people's mentality and attitude are going to be
different obviously. In poor countries, people don't have as much money
and material possessions, so therefore they are not so spoiled and "stuck
up" as people in capitalist countries. What they lack in material
assets, they make up for in personality and soulfulness. It's a simple
trade-off here. In the US, it's vice versa of
course. Therefore, it is not realistic to expect them to be the same as
us (and thank goodness for that). And that's one reason why people in
general in Russia
are more open and friendly. Therefore, the major factor in why Russian
women are so much friendlier and open has to do with the economic/social system
they live under and the mentality it produces, and not because they are
desperate to leave their country.
Let's face the dreaded brutal reality here. In America,
everything is all about MONEY, MONEY, MONEY. It's always the bottom line,
no matter how you try to sweet talk around it or look at things through rose
colored glasses. Now I'm not saying it's all everyone thinks about.
What I am saying is that it pretty much CONTROLS, RUNS, and GOVERNS everything
that functions, runs, operates, etc. in life and society. Not that it
should be that way of course, but that's how it is. The power of the
almighty dollar rules in our society.
In America, you are literally forced to "live for money".
Deep down in our SOULS, we know
that it SHOULDN'T be that way. In our spirits, we know that God did not
intend for life to be all about money. But the problem is, that's how
things ARE right now. That's how things are set up to run and operate in
this world. It's part of a global large scale system that everyone has to
conform to. So we have to live and deal with it. We have no choice
but to conform to it in order to live, function, pay bills, feed our families,
have free time, do what we want to do, and retire someday.
A Lithuanian critic of America observed:
http://www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/Senate/1120/article1.html
“I see that in this cutthroat society, based on a
"greed is good" philosophy, unlimited profit seeking, selfishness,
fraud and greediness for money dominates everywhere. Money is absolutely the
bottom line for everything. In America, the rich are truly rich
and the poor are hopelessly poor. In my opinion, the United States today has the most
advanced system of private tyranny.”
He further concludes:
“I am of the opinion that American capitalism is
incompatible with humaneness. Moreover, this inhumane system has led to the
moral bankruptcy of American society, which has bred the alienation of people,
breakdown of families, enormous crime and the drug epidemics.”
And one of my eloquent readers vehemently stated:
“This country is based on the "all,
not so mighty dollar". It makes me sick to my stomach. We are taught from
the beginning to go to school, get a good education so you can find a good
paying job so you can acquire as much useless debt as possible and pay the rest
of your life. Even then, the cars, houses etc don't belong to you because you
only receive a deed or a certificate of title. The government owns it all. Many
people here don't believe it but I always ask, Why do you pay property taxes
every year and why do you have to have a drivers license, with insurance,
registration and inspection. The answer I get, "It's the law". What
law? The law only exists in your minds if you realize that everything
applies to your corporate body and not your natural person(human being). Most
people don't even have a clue and look at you strange when you say this.
American people in general are the most plastic people in the world literally.
I mean, it seems just about everyone lives on credit. I did for a while and
found out the truth and stopped paying on my own credit.”
Elaborating on the assertion that not only are
Americans “plastic” people, but that they live on “plastic” as well, he writes:
“What people around the world don't understand is that
America
has been bankrupt since 1933 and everyone lives on IOU's or credit. Hell, our
own money supply is funded by a private corporation known as the Federal
Reserve and has nothing to do with the US Government. The truth of the matter
is that the American people have been put up as collateral for the national
debt by means of our future labor. Don't believe this? Look at any bill,
statement, government document or anything that has to do with commerce and see
how your name is written. You'll find it all written in all upper case
letters representing a corporation in which is nothing more then an artificial
person or a front. The upper case name is for legal purposes which are color of
law, color of office, color of authority, all artificial. In fact the UCC
(Uniform Commercial Code) was developed because of the fiat money system we
have here. Since we have Federal Reserve Notes in which a note is a promise to
pay and not actually money, they had to come up with a system to tie the
artificial person with the artificial money supply. It's all smoke and mirror's
and the majority of the people have the least clue as to what's really going
on. I laugh when I hear that America
is probably the richest nation on earth. Sure it is if you call credit being
rich, owing and owing for the rest of your life and then passing it down to
your next to kin. I could write 8 hours on whats going on and back every word
of it up. It's all on the internet and all u have 2 do is search. Later 4
now.”
There is this laughably
ridiculous notion in our country that Capitalism is based on and supported
by Judeo-Christian values. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Anyone with even a surface knowledge of the two could see that there are some
obvious fundamental conflicts.
Capitalism teaches that greed is good, benefiting the economy and
oneself, while Christian teachings and Bible passages clearly teach that greed
is bad, wicked, and leads to destruction. Also, Capitalism teaches that
selfishness and profit motive is good, and that one should win at all costs,
while Christianity teaches selflessness, humility, giving up worldly
desires, and servitude to the Lord. A Bible passage even says that
it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle, than for a rich
man to enter the kingdom
of Heaven (Matthew 19:24)
which clearly does not support the greed of Capitalism. And neither does
Matthew 6:24 "No man can serve two masters: for
either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the
one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon."
So why do the Capitalists in
this country try to pretend that they both support each other? It seems like a pathetic attempt to
reconcile the irreconcilable.
Perhaps at the root of this problem is an outdated
ideology that amassing wealth and private property equals freedom, an idea
borrowed from the European Enlightenment era of the 18th
Century. Jeremy Rifkin explains this in
his book The
European Dream, page 158:
"Most of my European friends and
acquaintances are quick to ridicule America's love affair with
"the almighty dollar." "All you Americans think about is
money" has become a standard mantra in virtually every opening discussion
about the American character and the American way of life. In reality,
the American condition is more complex. It's not the money per se.
Rather, it's the search for personal security that comes from being propertied,
the belief that our possessions will make us free. For many Europeans who
have opted or less wealth and more play, the American obsession with creating
propertied wealth appears more like a kind of pathology. They say that
"our possessions end up possessing us.
But the point is, it was the American
people that became the purest advocates of the European Enlightenment idea that
equates private property with freedom.”
Clearly, America's culture,
lifestyle, values, and mentality are almost completely materialistic in
nature. The country is almost completely
controlled and run by industries of mass consumerism. These aggregate
industrial powers in America
control everything - capital, resources, jobs, politics, your lifestyle, your
freedom, your values, your culture, etc. in more ways than you know.
Their power, control, and influence are completely insurmountable.
They're here to stay, and there's nothing anyone can do about it.
In many cases, the US no longer has to use
military power to conquer other nations. It can just control them
economically in a variety of covert ways to get what they want out of them,
using propaganda as excuses to do so. As a result, the other countries of
the world, in order to compete, are also forced to adopt more materialistic
values and consumer-driven systems as well. (Already, much of Asia has fallen
into a highly materialistic-driven lifestyle and mentality, e.g. Hong
Kong, Japan, Taiwan, Korea, etc. while Europe, Europe/Russia, South America,
and Africa generally still have very soul-driven, cultured and family-oriented
mentalities and lifestyles, fortunately.) In other cases, the US
gets involved in secret covert operations to overthrow governments and regimes
in the interest of corporate greed.
Therefore, we can conclude that the US has led and made the
world much more materialistic minded than it once was. That's one of the
reasons why so many foreigners and intellectuals dislike or are critical of America,
which our media never ever talks about. (Our media NEVER broadcasts any
counter-culture viewpoints, ever, but only viewpoints which are conventional,
clicheish, politically correct, and that reflect a materialistic mentality (it
would probably be over the typical media puppet's head and intellect to do so
anyway). Therefore, there is almost no diversity of viewpoint broadcast
in our media, contrary to the diversity that exists in real life.)
Some think that this is all a good thing of course,
with all the technological improvements and comforts that US capitalism has
brought. However, in my travels and experience with people, materialistic
people are just not as evolved, interesting, happy, or pleasant to be around as
non-materialistic people. And don’t think I’m alone either; a lot of
people I’ve met have similar observations. Also, having a strong
materialistic lifestyle and outlook is the antithesis to the soul and
intellect. Furthermore, what is the point of slaving away your whole life
just so you can have freedom in your retirement age? The precious years
of youth are wasted in such conditions. It makes no sense, and almost no
one in retrospect is glad they did so. These issues are subjective of
course, but that's my opinion on it.
Now, most of the rest of the world outside of America
is still not as materialistic minded as we are. They do not see career
and money as the ultimate aim and aspiration of existence like we do, and
simply don't have to! In many countries, people's mentalities are focused
around culture and family solidarity.
However, America's
foreign policy, economic influence, expansion, imperialism, etc. over the
world, is attempting to convert the rest of the world to be like us (under the
name of democracy and freedom). (For some reason, our foreign policy
makers and pro dists think that we are the role model for the rest of the world
to copy and emulate.
The Lithuanian anti-capitalist immigrant mentioned
earlier, wrote a very vehement treatise against US foreign policy and its
aims, here: http://www.geocities.com/CapitolHill/Senate/1120/america31.html
Hence, the rest of the world is becoming consumption
driven, materialistic minded, and capitalist in structure. Eventually,
people in other countries will also be forced to center their existence around
money and career too. They will have no choice. And it will be all
in the name of "progress". It's a sad state of affairs.
But that's what the mechanized impersonal capitalist systems that control the
flow of all resources and capital is turning the world into. Just look at
how things have developed in the world over the past century, and you will see
how obvious this is.
And these are among the valid reasons why US
culture and influence is disliked and abhorred by many foreign intellectuals,
especially European. They see its
industrial culture and economic system as a mindless powerful machine that
destroys the mind, soul, and environment. (See Industrial Society
Destroys Mind and Environment by a researcher in India) And to make it
worse, it poses a dangerous threat to the world by enforcing its influence on
the world to bring about the same destruction onto other nations, which many
see through and object.
My Expat Advisor stated:
“While it may not be
sophisticated, American culture is not bankrupt in the financial sense. It is
very powerful. It is ousting all the other cultures from where they are. Hollywood movies dominate the airwaves and US fashions
dominate the world. And it is up to the people to choose and the young people
around the world are crazy about American cultures, fashion and food. No other
culture is as powerful nowadays.”
Jeremy Rifkin, writes on our outmoded international
appeal in The
European Dream, page 16 - 17:
“That's why it saddens me
to say that America
is no longer a great country. Yes, it's still the most powerful economy in the
world, with a military presence unmatched in all of history. But to be a great
country, it is necessary to be a good country. It is true that people
everywhere enjoy American cultural forms and consumer goods. Rap music, action
movies, and other forms of entertainment, as well as our brand-name clothes,
are eagerly snapped up around the world. America is even envied, but
it is no longer admired as it once was. The American Dream, once so coveted,
has increasingly become an object of derision. Our way of life no longer
inspires; rather, it is now looked on as outmoded and, worse yet, as something
to fear, or abhor.”
Now, on a deeper note, I happen to believe in karma,
and also in the Greek and Chinese saying that "everything should be in
moderation". I surmise that extremities when prolonged, eventually
collapse and result in a major toppling shift at some point. History has
shown this, since in reality, nothing can have unlimited growth. Eventually, growth must collapse in order to
make way for new growth cycles. Such is
simply the law of the universe.
Hence, our extreme "life is all about money"
principle is too unnatural to sustain forever, and that at some point
eventually, there will be a radical reformation or revolution of the status quo
of some sort, whether karmic or material in nature. In other words, the
prolonged imbalance of all this must inevitably cause some sort of upsurge of
the status quo, whether socially, spiritually, or economically. The
system we have is just too unnatural and imbalanced to sustain forever in my
view. I am not trying to make any specific prophecies here, just my
general observation on the big picture of things.
However, change is never easy, and the
psychological/cultural obstacle that America faces in an
increasingly global world, are, according to author Jeremy Rifkin:
The
European Dream, page 23:
“It’s going to be very difficult for
Americans to adjust to a borderless world of relationships and flows where
everyone is increasingly connected in webs and networks, and dependent on one
another for one’s individual and collective well-being. What happens to the
American sense of being special, of being a chosen people, in a world where
exclusivity is steadily giving way to inclusivity? Does God really care less
about the whole of his earthly creation than he does about the North American
part? Europeans might find such a conjecture funny, but, believe me, many
Americans remain wedded to the notion of our special status as God’s chosen
ones. If we were to give up that belief,
or even entertain doubt about its veracity, our sense of confidence in
ourselves and the American Dream might experience irreparable harm.”
Page 83 - 85:
"THE TUG BETWEEN EUROPE and America
goes even deeper than questions of personal opportunity and quality of
life. What really distinguishes the comings and goings in Europe and
America today is that Europe is busy preparing for a new era while America is
desperately trying to hold on to the old one.
What we are going to find, by retracing
European history, are the roots of the American Dream that we discussed in
chapter 1. Although historians rarely allude to it, the reality is that
the American Dream represents the thinking of a moment of time, frozen in
European history and transported whole cloth to American shores in the
eighteenth century, where it continued to animate the American experience right
up to the present day.
We Americans like to think of ourselves
as forward-thinking, with our attention focused on the distant horizon. However, our worldview, strangely enough, is
locked into a specific period of time long since passé by in European
history. In short, the American Dream is a very old dream and becoming
increasingly irrelevant in the new era of globalization."
Mr. Rifkin though, offers hope in the new European
Union:
The European
Dream, page 13 – 14:
“The American Dream puts an
emphasis on economic growth, personal wealth, and independence. The new
European Dream focuses more on sustainable development, quality of life, and
interdependence. The American Dream pays homage to the work ethic. The European
Dream is more attuned to leisure and deep play. The American Dream is
inseparable from the country's religious heritage and deep spiritual faith. The
European Dream is secular to the core. The American Dream is assimilationist.
We associate success with shedding our former cultural ties and becoming
free agents in the great American melting pot. The European Dream, by contrast,
is based on preserving one's cultural identity and living in a multicultural
world. The American Dream is wedded to love of country and patriotism. The
European Dream is more cosmopolitan and less territorial. Americans are
more willing to employ military force in the world, if necessary, to protect
what we perceive to be our vital self-interests. Europeans are more reluctant
to use military force and, instead, favor diplomacy, economic assistance, and
aid to avert conflict and prefer peacekeeping operations to maintain order.
Americans tend to think locally while European's loyalties are more divided and
stretch from the local to the global. The American Dream is deeply personal and
little concerned with the rest of humanity. The European Dream is more
expansive and systemic, and therefore more bound to the welfare of the planet.”
Discuss this article in this forum thread: http://www.happierabroad.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=6759
See also:
The Industrial Culture of
America and Automaton Populace
Debunking the Myth of
Freedom and Democracy in America
The Big Lie: Why America is all about
Control and Conformity, not Truth or Freedom
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