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Do not do it brother. Do not give in to the path of least resistance. You came here for a reason now fufil that reason. Patience, planning and hard work can get anybody where they need to be. Do not give up.
There is a young lady i know and she wants to live abroad and teach english. She has no children and no bills yet she is stuck in depression and overeating. She is 26 and 300 something pounds and recently had a heart attack. Can you imagine if she was to die young without living her dreams?
I told her to wake up and stop being lazy, i say the same thing to you!
This right here, good post NAG.
It's really quite the bitch, isn't it gentlemen? Every time we interact with American women in a romantic/intimate/sexual manner we put ourselves at a HUGE risk. Yet, at the same time, we're men and we go crazy when we go long periods of time without the company of a female and everything it brings. I really don't know what to do with myself, honestly. For me to do this right way -- for me to take care of my debts, save up a good nestegg, finish a 4-year degree and get CELTA certified so I can leave and teach English abroad, it's going to be a good 4 years or so before I'll be ready to go. Every day I wonder how the HELL I'm going to last that long alone, no girlfriend, no sex, very few friends, etc etc.
But if I give in and try to hook up with women here (or heaven forbid get into an official relationship with one) my entire life and dream of heading abroad could be RUINED forever.
I have to persevere. But HOW do I persevere when the NEED to have sex and have female companionship is so great and undeniable within me? I can't go to escorts because I have to have an emotional connection to women to enjoy sex with them. I took a risk and had a couple of flings last year because I was desperate to have sex again, but I just didn't enjoy myself and felt gross afterward because I had no interest in these women.
It's a cruel, twisted world and now more than ever, only the strong survive. Sad but true.
We have to keep fighting the good fight and PROTECT OURSELVES if we want our greatest dreams to one day come true.
Why do you need a girlfriend when all it will do is result in an unexpected pregnancy? Then you'll be in worse shape than you are right now.
I take natural herbs that you can buy for my emotions, you guys should do the same. Nothing is more important than getting your life together before getting a girlfriend.
You should masterbate like your life depends on it, then you'll feel better. Attend seminars and meet people who are wealthy so you can learn from them.
Being needy with women will mess up your life including getting into long term relationships with American women. Check your ego and hire a escort for Christ's sake.
If you saw me in person, you would swear we are both twins. You and I are around the same age. We're both black and we favor each other in the face. You remind me of myself. I think the biggest thing for us guys on here is self control and self discipline.
Why are you guys so afraid of being alone? All a girlfriend in America will do is make your life miserable with the nagging, cheating, denying you sex, lying about her being on the pill ect.
The only thing I could suggest that if you can't survive without an American woman is that you have to project the image like you're wealthy. Buy a suit that looks expensive and walk around in it, then you will get more looks from women.
While you guys wait until things get better, how about modeling yourself after someone who is successful?
Develop a special talent that could help you make it big or increase your exposure.
I remember that Winston said he became involved in acting when he was younger. Which is why I wonder why never tried to get into Hollywood.
You could learn how to be an internet personality, learn how to build and own your own radio station or even tv station, take acting lessons and audition for films. I mean do something so that you can keep yourself occupied until your life gets better and who knows maybe you might make it big.
Read books on how to become a comedian if you ever wanted to do that. Take care of your education but you could be developing talents that you never thought you had. It may be hard and people might discourage you but many successful people had people who told them they could not do it.
You could learn professional phototraphy and start your own photography business. I know that America sucks but there are still many opportunities you can take advantage of.
At the end of the day if your life sucks it's your fault and until you including myself takes responsibility for how our lives are then it will be that much harder to fix the problem.
You have to fix the damn problem even if it hurts. We gotta stop blaming others. I know that American women suck but do they control everything we do?
While you wait for things to get better why not start TODAY and improve your life? Then it will take your mind off of it until things improve. There are so many resources available to be whatever you want to be without even going to college but I think you should go to college if it will get you where you want to go.
Even with foreign women, I wouldn't suggest getting serious with one UNTIL you have achieved your dreams in life. If you get married or in a LTR even with a good woman, she will be your dream killer.
Play the field, then once you are content where you are in life then get into a serious relationship.
I choose to live ALONE. I can still have fun with women. Then I can come home however late I want, do what I want when I want, go out with friends whenever I want, eat what I want, I can leave my socks on my bedroom without someone complaining about it.
No one telling me how wrong I am. Even with a foreign woman, it's still great to to alone.
Alright fellas. I'm back and ready to continue this discussion. First off, I just want to say I appreciate the advice. I see the encouragement to stay steadfast to my decision to eventually move abroad and find love wherever that may be. Good looking out fellas.
However, I didn't give up on my dream. It's on my mind everyday. Mexico, Southern Spain, or even Peru. It's just that as a man I crave being with a woman. It's been too long. I love the company of a woman. You all know. You're men. You understand where I'm coming from.
Now the things is there are a select few of people that know how I feel about women in this country besides you guys. These people I'm referring to, say there [i]are[i] good women out and I always say, well, there either married or with the wrong guy. And, yes, there are cases where good women are with good men. But I see it time after time good women ending up with the wrong guy or desiring to be with the wrong. So what's my point? It's time to see for [b]myself[b] if I can find a good American women. Like I said, to get experience. They are out there. Since I can't go anywhere due to my financial obligations here and the lease renewal I might as well just see what I can find. Fellas, I DON'T TAKE THEM SERIOUSLY. That's the mindset to have. I'm relaxed about it now. If things fail...oh well. I'm not boning any of these broads. That's not my style. I know what you said E_Irizarry about me looking like Jack Napier.
Although I say that I'll be selective and give certain ones a chance, there are a couple things that make me want to rethink that decision. For one, emotions get involved when you're dating someone and if there is an emotional attachment between us I feel my dream of escaping this circus called the US to another country will slowly dwindle. Also, dating as we all know it in this country is just a complete joke. I hate the formalities and rigidness of dating. It's tiring. All in all, my heart says stick to your plan but being the man that I am I start to give in to those feelings of wanting a female companion. It's tough fellas.
To answer your question Maker 55, yes, I'm still trying to work on my online business from time to time.
I get what you're trying run down to me man. I appreciate the words of encouragement. I'm not giving up. I'm just getting impatient and craving some female energy.
The same to you too Havetofly I'm just getting impatient.
Also an announcement. I did in fact meet a beautiful Indian girl. She's 30. I met her on Shaadi.com. She sent the interest. So we've been talking about a month now on Saturdays. I talk to her and her mother. She is definitely wife material. She says she wants to give this 6 months to a year to make a decision if she wants to make the move over here. However, we did make an agreement that we wouldn't restrict ourselves from talking or getting involved with someone if someone happens to come our way. So I do have something cooking abroad which could potentially turn into a wife. We'll see. If we don't end up being together I'll continue on with my plan. In the meantime, like I said, we'll see what happens here. Most likely it's not going to be much because I just don't have the energy or desire to want to approach woman and do all the stupid crap required to get one. Now the black girl, I mentioned at my job, I'll see what's up because the attraction is mutual and like I said, besides her beauty, she seems very humble and warm.
I'm still holding on to my dream fellas even though I'm anxious for that female companionship. I'm just out to have a good time and get some experience.
Last edited by OTB on February 1st, 2012, 4:42 am, edited 1 time in total.
We love you here at H.A., man (as AhhhMovingOn from YouTube said, "No fag [no homo]" LOL!!). Therefore, we want to see the best for you. That's why @ times we give that tough love as I expect it sometimes, too.
And that Black girl at the job?!?? OMG. Where's SSJ Parris? Where's Contrarian Expatriate? Where's well-informed to inoculate some sense into ya??
1) NEVER EVER FRATENIZE WITH AN A.W. ON OR OFF THE JOB. With the competitive crab-in-the-barrel SINdrome and people trying to get "one up" on ya culture (as well as people scared of losing their job and will rat others out just to look worthy of keeping their job), don't think you are untouchable from being bamboozled into losing that job f***ing with some shit like that. And she's Black too? Get off of that Hotep nuts and berries incense ghost ride, man! You look like Jack Napier that should be smashing a Russian version of a cougar like Nina Hartley the porn star or a nice European squirter like the EU version of Cytherea the squirting queen porn star or some shit.
Stop feeling just because you are Black that you have "loyalty" to your own "race". One of your ancestors looked like they used to make mangu and pastelitos in the bath tub with scorching-hot water so you have that advantage with Dominican (not the state-side bigoted ones) among other Latinas.
2) Forget Peru. So for the sake of not reinventing the wheel and not going into my spiel, I am not going to repeat why, but don't, ok.
"I appreciate the opportunities I have in America. Opportunities that allow me to live abroad." **Smiles** - Have2Fly@H.A. (2013)
"The only way to overcome that is to go abroad to get a broad."
- E. Irizarry (2009)
"MGTOW resilience is the key to foreign residence. You better muthafuckin' ask somebody!!"
- E. Irizarry (2012)
"I rather be ostracized by 157.0 million (27.3% of the US of Gay pop), then to appease 1 feminist." - E. Irizarry (2013)
TanBoy by DNA | Despedido, Hugo Chavez...Descansa en paz!
I set a no dating coworker policy on myself but then I said you never know man. Just see what's up. But I agree E_Irizarry. I think I should leave that one alone.
No, I don't feel I have to be loyal to my race. It's her vibe that caught my attention. It's funny you say I look Dominican. When I lived over there they thought I was. Even my coworkers thought I was Puerto Rican or Dominican. I speak Spanish so that really threw some of them off. I come from a line of mixed ancestry. So that explains why I resemble a Caribbean Latino.
My other advice to you brother man OTB is this just deal with American women as concubines only. They are only good for casual sex. They made America this way along with their Mangina handlers. I have women coming at me too looking at the fine light skin brother that i am and i tell them all "We can f**k that's about it". They all look sad and say "I am looking for love". I tell them "I had love now i have child support and problems". So just f**k a few here and there and concentrate on dealing with a foreign woman for the long term.
American Women=f**k buddies, Foreign Women=Wives or LTR
But that's the thing right there -- what about false rape charges? What about accidental pregnancies or STD's? The risk is high for all of those with ameriskanks.
Is getting your dick wet really worth the risk of having the big dream ruined forever?
OTB, all I can say is good luck and God speed, friend. I highly advise you don't do it because getting involved with someone at work could turn out to be a gigantic catastrophe. If things turned sour between you two, then you are left with 2 options:
1) quit your job
2) continue working at your job with the awkward and disdainful feeling of being around your ex.
I'm sure you don't want either which only amplifies the reason to not date a woman you work with.
OTB, that "vibe" that you speak of between you and that black girl at work - it's called desperation. I don't have to tell you how many red flags are up with dealing with an American(1) black woman(1000) that you work for the same company(15) with. Do the math, and that's a lot more than zero red flags there.
"Manginas grovel. Men travel." - me (04/17/2012)
"I used to be one of those men who believed that men are better than women at everything. Then I stood corrected!
Women are better than men at... getting fat." - me (02/24/2013)
Black women suck at life.