Join John Adams, world renowned Intl Matchmaker, Thurs nights 8:30 EST for Live Webcasts with FREE Prizes!
And check out Five Reasons why you should attend a FREE Live AFA Seminar! See locations and details.


Scam free! Check out Christian Filipina - Meet Asian women with Christian values! Members screened.
Exclusive book offer! 75% off! How to Meet, Date and Marry Your Filipina Wife



View Active Topics       Latest 100 Topics       View Your Posts       FAQ Topics       Switch to Mobile


The 'Greener on the other side' syndrome of American culture

Discuss and talk about any general topic.

Moderators: jamesbond, fschmidt

The 'Greener on the other side' syndrome of American culture

Postby Cantthinkofausername » Mon Apr 30, 2012 5:08 am

This is likely to be my first and most likely only post but I feel there's a great deal of toxcicity and confusion with a good deal of the young (and older) men here and though I'm not sure if this type of topic has been posted before I feel it is appropriate.

I've noticed here and elsewhere on the internet there seems to be a great gender war between Americans. American Male vs American Female. I see a great deal of finger pointing on this site towards American Females and a great deal of finger pointing on female dominated sites towards American Males, each blaming the other for various problems.

And while the guys here and the women there all have very good, if extreme, points that they bring up about the other gender I honestly feel most people seem to be missing some key reasons as to why Americans, like no other, have turned on their own Countrymen/women in a way I rarely, if ever, see in people from other countries.

This is purely the opinion of an outsider and there will be generalizations so be warned.

The problem is neither American Women, nor is the problem American Men for the constant dissatisfaction both sexes seem to feel for each other. Indeed, I believe the problem lies squarely with your culture, specifically your consumerism culture.

Overall the consumer culture of America seems to be one of perpetual dissatisfaction and 'the grass is always greener' syndrome, this had spilled over into every facet of American life, most notably into relationships and it's had an EXTREMELY toxic effect on the way American Men and Women relate to each other and go about relationships. You've been raised on the idea that you deserve more, you deserve better, you shouldn't have to settle and the idea of instant gratification and the disposablility of things that don't make you "happy" in favor of newer and shinier things that DO make you "happy".

Think about this for a moment. Almost from the day they were born modern American women have been forcefed a diet of Disney promises, Harlequin dreams and Twilight-esqe prince charming expectations. They are told constantly that every girl is a princess and every girl deserves The Perfect Man, Prince Charming, Her Soulmate etc. This of course poses a problem for mortal men as nobody is perfect except in fairytales and harlequin romance novels.

On the other end of the spectrum American Men have likewise been forcefed a message and this is one of the Insatiable Slut, The Girl Gone Wild, and the Not A One Woman Man idea. In the complete opposite direction from American Women, American Men have been fed the idea that they should either have a perfect woman or, more commonly, that they should have a veritable revolving door of ageless, spotless, 'lady on the street but a freak in the sheets' supermodels. There has also been an increase in the message aimed directly at men (specifically young men) that marriage is a trap, that settling down will rob you of your manhood and cage the tiger inside and that having children and staying with one woman is an end to your freedom and the beginning of your new enslavement. There is an additional problem in the incredibly easy access to porn has had an almost greater affect on the happiness of American Men because real women don't seem to compare and when American Men do find a good Woman for themselves they don't want to settle down because there's the lurking idea that something better might come along and when it does you'll be chained in the bonds of matrimony.



So what does this mean for the sexes? It mean you have a country full of entitled princesses and eternal boys, both out to fill the void of discontentment that their society has sowed within them and unable to do so because their expectations are so out of whack with reality that true fulfillment is impossible.

This sometimes leads to 'the grass is always greener' syndrome to the scale where American Men and Women seek happiness with the 'other'. Another country and their people, trying to find contentment in what they perceive as being superior members of the opposite sex (for Men this is often Asian Women, for Women this is often European Men). Sometimes they do find their elusive happiness but more often than not this leads to even more problems. If you can't find fulfillment at home it's not going to be a picnic finding fulfillment across language and cultural barriers.

In the end I think it's important to realize that "Feminazi, stuck up bitches" and "immature man-children" aren't really the problem, the problem is something far more complex than being able to point a finger at the opposite sex and proclaim "them" the problem. The problem is something deep and complicated and insidiously subtle in the very culture of America and its people where promises are made to the populace that can't possibly be kept and thus leads to disappointment and dissatisfaction in everything: your clothes, your looks, your car, your relationships, even your very country and language.

Hopefully this has resonated with some if the discontent and lonely that prowl this site and will lead to honest discussions and exploration. If not at least I hope I've brought an intelligent opinion to the table.

signed,
25/f/Canada ;)

Image
Cantthinkofausername
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 1
Joined: Mon Apr 30, 2012 3:32 am







Postby Falcon » Mon Apr 30, 2012 5:54 am

Bravo! I am highly impressed by your post and really did appreciate your well thought-out opinion. Some points I'd like to make:

(1) Family law is highly messed up in many Western countries, so men are afraid of potential future alimony and other financial consequences. However, I do agree that many American men appear to be perpetually immature, remaining as "eternal boys," preferring to play computer games and party rather than focusing on family and on intellectual issues. Many non-American men are far more mature.


Sometimes they do find their elusive happiness but more often than not this leads to even more problems. If you can't find fulfillment at home it's not going to be a picnic finding fulfillment across language and cultural barriers.


(2) Yes, there are some cases where language and cultural barriers with a foreign mate have caused big problems, but many cases have also been tremendously successful. Evidence: We have plenty of long-term success stories in this forum. Has the grass been greener on the other side? For many of us, yes. But I do agree that one needs to have a certain degree of mental/physical health, optimism, and social skills in order to also be happier abroad.


Overall the consumer culture of America seems to be one of perpetual dissatisfaction and 'the grass is always greener' syndrome, this had spilled over into every facet of American life, most notably into relationships and it's had an EXTREMELY toxic effect on the way American Men and Women relate to each other and go about relationships. You've been raised on the idea that you deserve more, you deserve better, you shouldn't have to settle and the idea of instant gratification and the disposablility of things that don't make you "happy" in favor of newer and shinier things that DO make you "happy".


(3) The typical American woman AND man are usually very stuck-up, narcissistic, entitled, and depressed people. Both genders often talk about each other more like objects than like actual people. There is a lot of focus on superficiality.
Falcon
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 1651
Joined: Sun Nov 06, 2011 11:59 pm

Re: Greener on the other side

Postby DarkMinxMish » Mon Apr 30, 2012 7:12 am

Hey,

you mentioned some really nice points and a fresh view that isn't often discussed. It's getting to the root of our problems, views, and culture as you have stated. The problems are only a by-product of what we as Americans have been fed all of our lives. I've noticed in the past few years that our society is about keeping people apart in any way, shape, or form possible. America doesn't want happy healthy united people, not at all. Thank you!
Pricking up her golden head:
We must not look at goblin men,
We must not buy their fruits:
Who knows upon what soil they fed
Their hungry thirsty roots?"
DarkMinxMish
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 82
Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2012 6:14 am

Re: Greener on the other side

Postby sushiman » Mon Apr 30, 2012 8:48 am

Cantthinkofausername wrote:This is purely the opinion of an outsider and there will be generalizations so be warned.

The problem is neither American Women, nor is the problem American Men for the constant dissatisfaction both sexes seem to feel for each other. Indeed, I believe the problem lies squarely with your culture, specifically your consumerism culture.

Overall the consumer culture of America seems to be one of perpetual dissatisfaction and 'the grass is always greener' syndrome, this had spilled over into every facet of American life, most notably into relationships and it's had an EXTREMELY toxic effect on the way American Men and Women relate to each other and go about relationships. You've been raised on the idea that you deserve more, you deserve better, you shouldn't have to settle and the idea of instant gratification and the disposablility of things that don't make you "happy" in favor of newer and shinier things that DO make you "happy".



Sure, very well said. The enemy is the system not a gender, both genders are victims of that system. Not sure that what you said is that controversial, most the guys here know that and THAT'S WHY they want out, or are already out. One man can't help an entire culture of fools become enlightened.

The grass is greener sometimes though, I moved to Asia and it's really green and nice over here! :)
sushiman
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 324
Joined: Mon Mar 21, 2011 5:56 pm
Location: Seoul

Re: Greener on the other side

Postby sushiman » Mon Apr 30, 2012 8:59 am

DarkMinxMish wrote:I've noticed in the past few years that our society is about keeping people apart in any way, shape, or form possible. America doesn't want happy healthy united people, not at all.


That's true also. Dividing men and women is the most basic way a smart person would go about designing good slaves, err just not sure why that would be the goal...the country is crumbling what they need is a strong foundation, and that comes from strong people/families.

But you're right, it's seen everywhere there; make people distrust each other, backstab each other, divorce, etc. Competition inside and outside the home 24/7. Americans actually seem terrified of any sort of sincere communication, like they feel guilty they are doing something they shouldn't be doing. Geez, really weird f***ing place! :/

The grass really is greener elsewhere, run for your life I say.

But for American women, nobody wants them, so there is nowhere to go. Sorry, but it's true.
sushiman
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 324
Joined: Mon Mar 21, 2011 5:56 pm
Location: Seoul

Postby djfourmoney » Mon Apr 30, 2012 10:14 am

All you have to do is watch "Century of Self" and you'll understand what has happen here, especially the last two parts of this series.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lhxfArTAcfM[/youtube]

As long as you know what's going on you can fight against it. I've given up on saving others largely, when American dives head first into Humble Pie like the UK started too in the 1960s and throughout the 1970's it won't be pretty because we have large minority populations that will be used as escape goats and too many guns, making for a very violent series of events.

From the Government cracking down on protest or the Army being called to quell rioting mobs from coast to coast and millia forces looking to either overthrow the Government or start a "Race War".

Ugly, ugly times ahead.
djfourmoney
Elite Upper Class Poster
 
Posts: 3129
Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2010 11:09 pm
Location: Los Angeles

Re: Greener on the other side

Postby ladislav » Mon Apr 30, 2012 3:25 pm

Code: Select all
But for American women, nobody wants them, so there is nowhere to go.  Sorry, but it's true.


Actually, American men want them so they don't need to go. And abroad many want them because they think of them as Hollywood stars. Arabs, Turks, Italians, Black Africans and Caribbeans will take them any time.
A brain is a terrible thing to wash!
ladislav
Elite Upper Class Poster
 
Posts: 3578
Joined: Thu Sep 06, 2007 6:30 pm

Postby sushiman » Tue May 01, 2012 7:29 am

Hmm learn something new every day. I haven't spent much time in those places. Feel sorry for those suckers!
sushiman
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 324
Joined: Mon Mar 21, 2011 5:56 pm
Location: Seoul

Re: Greener on the other side

Postby FREEDOM1 » Tue May 01, 2012 7:35 am

ladislav wrote:
Code: Select all
But for American women, nobody wants them, so there is nowhere to go.  Sorry, but it's true.


Actually, American men want them so they don't need to go. And abroad many want them because they think of them as Hollywood stars. Arabs, Turks, Italians, Black Africans and Caribbeans will take them any time.



Yeah they want them for a f**k and chuck

do seriously beleive that these men would want to marry them

i dont believe they are as ignorant as you think

i doubt it , i think they know amercian women are easy

and thats all
FREEDOM1
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 147
Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2011 1:46 am

Postby sushiman » Tue May 01, 2012 2:45 pm

^ Yep. That's the stereotype in Korea. Korean guys heard that American women are sluts (from movies I think).

An american woman will bang some stranger in the alley they just met at a bar, which is very different from how any normal Korean woman would behave. So the Korean guys want to go talk dirty to them, bang, and dump. Ha poor dudes, it just doesn't work out like it does in the movies and they don't understand what went wrong.

Western women living in Korea will tell you lots of stories about K-pervs eyeing their breasts or grabbing their ass in the subway. But it's because their reputation is that of whores!! Not because they want an AW long term.
sushiman
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 324
Joined: Mon Mar 21, 2011 5:56 pm
Location: Seoul

Re: Greener on the other side

Postby Jackal » Tue May 01, 2012 3:24 pm

Cantthinkofausername wrote:Think about this for a moment. Almost from the day they were born modern American women have been forcefed a diet of Disney promises, Harlequin dreams and Twilight-esqe prince charming expectations. They are told constantly that every girl is a princess and every girl deserves The Perfect Man, Prince Charming, Her Soulmate etc. This of course poses a problem for mortal men as nobody is perfect except in fairytales and harlequin romance novels.

Sure, this may often be the case, but as far as the guys who post here go, most of us have grown up somewhat outside the usual system of the mainstream media in America: We always thought differently, liked different things, and watched different shows than most Americans. The very fact that we weren't as conditioned by the media as the others was one big reason why we never fit in in America.

Sure, both men and women in America are generally playing a pointless game--but at least they get praised for playing the game! Whereas true outsiders are despised more than anything in America. That's why many of us felt we had to leave.
Jackal
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 1229
Joined: Tue Mar 04, 2008 3:24 am
Location: Hungary

Re: Greener on the other side

Postby PeterAndrewNolan » Tue May 01, 2012 3:32 pm

Cantthinkofausername wrote:Hopefully this has resonated with some if the discontent and lonely that prowl this site and will lead to honest discussions and exploration. If not at least I hope I've brought an intelligent opinion to the table.

signed,
25/f/Canada ;)


25/f/Canada
All you did was to confirm your stupidity and ignorance. You have NO IDEA what is really going on and it shows. You women can just never shut up can you. You always have to have your say no matter it marks you as stupid and ignorant in the extreme.

The war between the sexes was instigated by the Illuminati as part of the depopulation program. It was a deliberate effort by MEN at the top of the tree who say there are too many useless eaters on this planet. And they would be right in your case.

To instigate a war of the sexes to reduce the population the Illuminati incited women to hate on and a compete with men because only women are stupid enough to fall for the idea that they are "equal" and "a woman can do anything a man can do". No man of any intelligence at all falls for a lie so blatant. A woman can not even pee standing up without getting her feet wet. A simple task any boy over the age of 5 accomplishes with ease.

Thanks for showing men how stupid and ignorant western women are. It will help them remember why they should not date you.
PeterAndrewNolan
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 1722
Joined: Sat Apr 21, 2012 10:25 am

Re: Greener on the other side

Postby Empyrian » Tue May 01, 2012 6:06 pm

PeterAndrewNolan wrote:25/f/Canada
All you did was to confirm your stupidity and ignorance. You have NO IDEA what is really going on and it shows. You women can just never shut up can you. You always have to have your say no matter it marks you as stupid and ignorant in the extreme.


This reminds me of someone else I know. You've lost it, young padawan.
Abolish fear; abolish doubt; dismiss pride.
Empyrian
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 48
Joined: Tue Apr 17, 2012 4:38 am
Location: Maryland, USA

Postby Jester » Tue May 01, 2012 8:08 pm

Great thread here.

All good input except for, well, Peter.

Peter it's amazing how you can cite actual facts, yet end up turning your post into a torrent of irrational anger. I don't think the hosility was justified by the OP's thoughtful insights.

You are an educated person and this is not your best.
"Pick a point and go to it."
-- Dr John Hunsucker, speaking about canoeing on Georgia's Lake Lanier, with its irregular shape, and 1000 miles of meandering shoreline
Jester
Elite Upper Class Poster
 
Posts: 7869
Joined: Tue Jan 20, 2009 9:10 am
Location: Chiang Mai Thailand

Postby S_Parc » Tue May 01, 2012 9:30 pm

Jester wrote:Peter it's amazing how you can cite actual facts, yet end up turning your post into a torrent of irrational anger. I don't think the hosility was justified by the OP's thoughtful insights.


Up until a year ago, any topic or conversation which resolved around my sister, would send me into a rage.

Now, since I've basically stopped associating with her, much of it is gone.
S_Parc
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 2414
Joined: Fri Nov 12, 2010 7:01 pm

Next

Return to General Discussions

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Google [Bot], Google Adsense [Bot], Winston and 4 guests

cron