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Have You Ever Been in Love?

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Have You Ever Been in Love?

Postby FreeWanderer » Mon Jul 30, 2012 3:19 pm

Have you ever been in love with a women? Was she American, or Foreign? What was it that made you fall in love? How did it affect you? Did it end well?

I started this thread because "Love" has been on my mind lately. I just had an encounter with my own "the one who got away"- an old flame who burned me quite badly. We met when we were both in high school and have had a long on again, off again interaction, but whenever we were together, there was so much chemistry between us we were a Biohazard. She was so witty, funny, when we were together it was like there was brilliant writer in the background giving us our lines.

The last time we were together, we got so close to being together... and then she disappeared from life. It took awhile to get over her.

We met up a few weeks ago- she is nothing like i remember her, but i guess my problem was always that I saw that same sweet girl from high school and ignored the monster she had turned into as an adult. She had become a cold, bitter, selfish, entitled gold-digger. I realize now as an adult the reason we got along so splendidly was because she is a sociopath and one of the most dangerous weapons a sociopath has is his/her ability to "mirror" people, and when you meet someone who is alot like you, you like them, or in my case you fall in love with them.

Part of me wonders what could have been if we had ever gotten together, but another part of me breathes a sigh of relief, because as bad as she did screw me over, i am sure it would have been far worse if I had given her full access to my life.

But looking back at it, I miss the electric feeling of love that I felt for her when I did burn so passionately for her. It may have been passion of first love, but i wonder if anyone here has ever found that kind of love again, perhaps in another part of the world. Has anyone else? I've looked elsewhere in America and no one else comes close to making me feel anything except disgust or depression.

More than anything, I want to feel that feeling of love again, and this time to have it returned to me.
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Postby WuFan » Mon Jul 30, 2012 7:05 pm

Real love is only reserved for beautiful people.

Everything else is just two people settling for each other because they knew they couldn´t get anyone better.
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Postby publicduende » Mon Jul 30, 2012 7:16 pm

WuFan wrote:Real love is only reserved for beautiful people.

Everything else is just two people settling for each other because they knew they couldn´t get anyone better.


Mate, honest, WTF? Love is reserved to people who know how to love (far beyond bedroom gymnastics). Mostly, beautiful inside people. Perhaps things will be better if people put more effort in finding real beauty inside average-looking people, instead of whining that the model-looking blonde they just saw at the bar is only settling for people who wield Veuve Cliquot jumbos and promise them exotic vacations on their yachts.
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Postby WuFan » Mon Jul 30, 2012 7:18 pm

publicduende wrote:
WuFan wrote:Real love is only reserved for beautiful people.

Everything else is just two people settling for each other because they knew they couldn´t get anyone better.


Mate, honest, WTF? Love is reserved to people who know how to love (far beyond bedroom gymnastics). Mostly, beautiful inside people. Perhaps things will be better if people put more effort in finding real beauty inside average-looking people, instead of whining that the model-looking blonde they just saw at the bar is only settling for people who wield Veuve Cliquot jumbos and promise them exotic vacations on their yachts.

She is a nurse and is funny and caring. I dare you to love her:

Image

































Now look at her. I bet you feel "love" now and want to be with her simply by looking at her face.

Image

It´s human nature, bro. Unfortunately this world is shallow as f**k.
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Postby publicduende » Mon Jul 30, 2012 7:41 pm

WuFan wrote:
publicduende wrote:
WuFan wrote:Real love is only reserved for beautiful people.

Everything else is just two people settling for each other because they knew they couldn´t get anyone better.


Mate, honest, WTF? Love is reserved to people who know how to love (far beyond bedroom gymnastics). Mostly, beautiful inside people. Perhaps things will be better if people put more effort in finding real beauty inside average-looking people, instead of whining that the model-looking blonde they just saw at the bar is only settling for people who wield Veuve Cliquot jumbos and promise them exotic vacations on their yachts.

She is a nurse and is funny and caring. I dare you to love her:

Image

Now look at her. I bet you feel "love" now and want to be with her simply by looking at her face.

Image

It´s human nature, bro. Unfortunately this world is shallow as f**k.


I think you're missing the point here. Yes, of course given a chance I would rather f**k Jessica Alba than "ugly nurse" (who has got a pair of decent eyes btw, did you notice?). Luckily when looking for love, well my definition of love at least, you won't be just looking at a photo, press a red button and have your new bride delivered to you on Fedex the day after! It takes an emotional build-up, it takes friendship, intimacy, understanding, all the conversations in the world, perhaps a few fights thrown in for good measure. I know ugly women who might not win a first glance from you when seen on a profile photo, but once met in person, they might show you something that Jessica Alba just doesn't have, or cannot be bothered to show you in the first place.

It's not the world that is shallow, it's just some people. It's sad to see every new generation is actually more materialistic and unable to get their priorities right than the previous one... How old are you WuFan? I am 37. This might explain the gap in mindset, who knows...
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Postby WuFan » Mon Jul 30, 2012 7:55 pm

publicduende wrote:It takes an emotional build-up, it takes friendship, intimacy, understanding, all the conversations in the world, perhaps a few fights thrown in for good measure.


No, it doesn´t. Love happens instantly for men. The moment you lay eyes on a hot girl you are immediatley in love. Needing to spend time and "falling" in love with a girl is your ego telling you: "I know I can´t truly get the girls I want. She´s the best I can get so I better rationalize why I love her to protect my ego".

It´s exactly the same for women.
but once met in person, they might show you something that Jessica Alba just doesn't have, or cannot be bothered to show you in the first place.

like what?

A nice and warm personality?

If that was what men really wanted they´d date their dog.
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Postby Voice of Reason » Mon Jul 30, 2012 10:12 pm

WuFan wrote:She is a nurse and is funny and caring. I dare you to love her:

Image


She doesn't look after herself, she looks like she eats 20 cakes a day.

Now look at her. I bet you feel "love" now and want to be with her simply by looking at her face.

Image


Nope...I just see too much make-up.

Perfect looking women just don't do it for me...it's like they are so perfect they become ordinary.

like what?

A nice and warm personality?

If that was what men really wanted they´d date their dog.


Quite possibly the most ridiculous analogy I have ever read.
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Postby publicduende » Tue Jul 31, 2012 12:28 am

WuFan wrote:
publicduende wrote:It takes an emotional build-up, it takes friendship, intimacy, understanding, all the conversations in the world, perhaps a few fights thrown in for good measure.


No, it doesn´t. Love happens instantly for men. The moment you lay eyes on a hot girl you are immediatley in love. Needing to spend time and "falling" in love with a girl is your ego telling you: "I know I can´t truly get the girls I want. She´s the best I can get so I better rationalize why I love her to protect my ego".


You are probably mistaking love for sexual desire. Two very different things indeed. If all your ego is looking for is the best possible looking chick given your current level of physical fitness and the size of your bank account, then forgive me for being rude if I say you're one of the shallowest people I have ever talked to. Do yourself a favour and grow up to the reality of human relationships. Real ones, not the ones you see on the Kardashians series.

WuFan wrote:It´s exactly the same for women.
publicduende wrote:but once met in person, they might show you something that Jessica Alba just doesn't have, or cannot be bothered to show you in the first place.

like what?

A nice and warm personality?

If that was what men really wanted they´d date their dog.


It was already clear enough from your statement above that you can't care less about your (sex) partner's personality, you simply long for a piece of meat to consume in the sack. So long you don't take an effort in looking for personality matches in your female friends and acquaintances, I won't be surprised that all you see in the opposite sex is shallowness.
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Postby odbo » Tue Jul 31, 2012 4:03 am

WuFan wrote:No, it doesn´t. Love happens instantly for men. The moment you lay eyes on a hot girl you are immediatley in love. Needing to spend time and "falling" in love with a girl is your ego telling you: "I know I can´t truly get the girls I want. She´s the best I can get so I better rationalize why I love her to protect my ego".

Lust is not love, instead of posting pseudo-philosophy jaded fools need to get off the internet and go somewhere genuine people still exist. The Jew-nited States of Hollywood is not the world.

http://www.happierabroad.com/forum/view ... hp?p=47504

Image
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Postby WuFan » Tue Jul 31, 2012 5:52 am

publicduende wrote:
WuFan wrote:
publicduende wrote:It takes an emotional build-up, it takes friendship, intimacy, understanding, all the conversations in the world, perhaps a few fights thrown in for good measure.


No, it doesn´t. Love happens instantly for men. The moment you lay eyes on a hot girl you are immediatley in love. Needing to spend time and "falling" in love with a girl is your ego telling you: "I know I can´t truly get the girls I want. She´s the best I can get so I better rationalize why I love her to protect my ego".


You are probably mistaking love for sexual desire. Two very different things indeed. If all your ego is looking for is the best possible looking chick given your current level of physical fitness and the size of your bank account, then forgive me for being rude if I say you're one of the shallowest people I have ever talked to. Do yourself a favour and grow up to the reality of human relationships. Real ones, not the ones you see on the Kardashians series.

WuFan wrote:It´s exactly the same for women.
publicduende wrote:but once met in person, they might show you something that Jessica Alba just doesn't have, or cannot be bothered to show you in the first place.

like what?

A nice and warm personality?

If that was what men really wanted they´d date their dog.


It was already clear enough from your statement above that you can't care less about your (sex) partner's personality, you simply long for a piece of meat to consume in the sack. So long you don't take an effort in looking for personality matches in your female friends and acquaintances, I won't be surprised that all you see in the opposite sex is shallowness.

yes, keep telling yourself that you´d rather date a 300pds warpig that works at an orphanage and is the nobel peace prize winnerthan a Jessica Alba lookalike with only an okay personality.

Whatever helps you sleep at night.
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Postby publicduende » Tue Jul 31, 2012 9:56 am

WuFan wrote:
publicduende wrote:
WuFan wrote:
publicduende wrote:It takes an emotional build-up, it takes friendship, intimacy, understanding, all the conversations in the world, perhaps a few fights thrown in for good measure.


No, it doesn´t. Love happens instantly for men. The moment you lay eyes on a hot girl you are immediatley in love. Needing to spend time and "falling" in love with a girl is your ego telling you: "I know I can´t truly get the girls I want. She´s the best I can get so I better rationalize why I love her to protect my ego".


You are probably mistaking love for sexual desire. Two very different things indeed. If all your ego is looking for is the best possible looking chick given your current level of physical fitness and the size of your bank account, then forgive me for being rude if I say you're one of the shallowest people I have ever talked to. Do yourself a favour and grow up to the reality of human relationships. Real ones, not the ones you see on the Kardashians series.

WuFan wrote:It´s exactly the same for women.
publicduende wrote:but once met in person, they might show you something that Jessica Alba just doesn't have, or cannot be bothered to show you in the first place.

like what?

A nice and warm personality?

If that was what men really wanted they´d date their dog.


It was already clear enough from your statement above that you can't care less about your (sex) partner's personality, you simply long for a piece of meat to consume in the sack. So long you don't take an effort in looking for personality matches in your female friends and acquaintances, I won't be surprised that all you see in the opposite sex is shallowness.

yes, keep telling yourself that you´d rather date a 300pds warpig that works at an orphanage and is the nobel peace prize winnerthan a Jessica Alba lookalike with only an okay personality.

Whatever helps you sleep at night.


You picked two extremes, and you're still missing the difference between having sex and falling in love with a potential life partner. Perhaps you're not the committing type and only looking for the former, well that's OK, keep on dreaming about Jessica Alba lookalikes and summoning your left hand whenever needed.

There are lots of decent women between the Nobel prize winner warpig and Jessica Alba. There are definitely women with good looks and a brain to match, not to mention a good heart. I haven't been exactly a playboy back in the years and yet I was able to find quite a few of them. Perhaps I was lucky, and yet something tells me that if one just tries to look past the good looks facade, he might be up for pleasant surprises.

One of the aspects of this forum I am still struggling to understand is why some of you guys are daydreaming about bedding as many model-quality girls as possible, whilst whining that they are all materialistic, feminist b*tches and don't deserve your long term commitment, or whatever you have to offer. You say you would never date the ladies whose profile pics you posted, but the point is: do you know them? Shouldn't you judge a person only after meeting her, perhaps talking to her a few times?

It looks to me you're barking up the wrong tree and complaining when cones fall down and hit you.
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Postby WuFan » Tue Jul 31, 2012 11:21 am

This is what I imagine everyone on this forum to look like after reading the posts on here:

Image
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Postby mariocarner » Tue Jul 31, 2012 1:39 pm

No i hate love :/
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Postby publicduende » Tue Jul 31, 2012 2:27 pm

Quite a few people here got seriously hurt during the dating game...
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Postby Winston » Tue Jul 31, 2012 4:10 pm

Have you heard this saying:

"People will recognize your inner beauty a lot easier when you have outer beauty as well."

So sad but true huh?
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
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