Discuss and talk about any general topic.
Ahh, the sexual purity topic arises again. Finding a virgin bride-of-your-youth in your teens or early 20s at bible college or something is cute and even feasible. Setting a premium for virginity beyond that age is stupid since 90+% of women have had sex by their 21st birthday and the majority of the remaining virgin pool are fatties and head-cases whom no one wanted to have sex with in the first place.
All the above, once again, leads me to wonder: what are you still doing in the US? Is there any family, medical, educational or financial reason why you can't sell off what you don't need and start backpacking through Poland, Ukraine, Lithuaniaa, Russia, Kazakhstan, etc.? I am still puzzled why lots of members here, especially the younger ones who should be by definition the more resourceful and adventurous, prefer talking about meeting the foreign women of their dreams, rather than going there and meet them! WTF guys, arm yourself with a bag and a laptop, buy a few of those Ryanair or Air Berlin tickets and see the other side of the fence by yourself. No trip report is better than the one you could be writing!
David, well, flattered you're entrusting me and my "experience" with such a delicate topic
If you want to pass your genes on and you're prepared, as it sounds from the above, to skip the love, relationship and parenthood experiences altogether, the solution is dead simple:
1) run a few IQ tests and get them on paper;
2) pop to a sperm bank and get a hint of your jizz frozen.
3) some woman at some point in time will pick up your ID from the database, and will have the undoubt privilege of bearing your heir. The beauty of this is, you won't even know whether she's a good, smart woman married to an infertile man, or a military-grade feminist on a single motherhood ego trip.
You're a very smart young man. As Eurobrat was saying, though, you have a tendency to over-think and apply your full arsenal of logic, rationality and finely-researched arguments to a domain, that of love and human interactions, which feeds on emotions, perceptions, and feelings much more than rational choices. It's a cocktail bar we're talking about here, not a gentleman's club: to get your daily dollar, you will have to learn to mix your world class whiskeys and brandies with cane sugar, mint leaf and grapefruit juice.
If, as you may agree with me, you don't know too much about women, use the principle of information isotropy to your advantage: since little is known, any place is a decent enough starting point! Start dating church girls, virgin and non-virgin, ladies off dating sites or the local grocery cashier. You may think that most of hitting on such pseudo-random specimens will be a waste of time, as they are all far from your definition of female utopia.
Think again! You've never been there, so how do can you know?
For gosh sake, take the plunge, talk to them, meet them, get rejections and one-night stands, cry, laugh, get hammered, learn by trial and errors, not by philosophical speculation, logical inference or from the vague advice you could get from people like us who - for all the "experience" they may have - are definitely not you. Hit them on dating websites, at the grocery store, at the synagogue (you told us your Dad is Jewish...aren't Jewish communities great for mingling?). Don't be concerned about their age, or the number of kids they have left with the baby sitter. You're not going to marry them. You can even ask your feminist sister to introduce you to some of her friends: even a simple chat with a couple of them, if done with unbiased mind, will have given you more experience than the one you would gain by sitting here exchanging posts!
Once you have a few points in the female universe map, for incredibly off the mark they could be, they would be useful for you to "triangulate" your tastes and preferences, and choose more and more precise specimen of women, until you will start finding your local maxima and will decide when good is good enough. In the meantime, you will have learned a lot about women and, most importantly, what you want from them. Have you discovered a fetish for large breasts? Would you be able to compromise on genetical optimality for a girl who will spend a few hours with her head buried into your chest? Are you really as keen as you think you are on intellectual conversations, once you have had the pleasure of jizzing on a girl's tonsils? And so on (pardon for the raunchy examples).
Cultivate your emotions, your intuition, your ability to "feel the vibe" and go with the flow of a conversation, an evening out. You're still incredibly young and have plenty of scope for failing, succeeding and learning in either case.
Just. Do. It.
Well...I think I'm a little "street smart" as far as relationships go. More than Tsar at least (no offense) or, say, that Donnely Miller guy from youtube who came here. I mean, my last relationship I was the mature one. I do have an idea of "utopia" as you put it, which is why I'm here. That girl was an immigrant.
You're right about my overthinking things though. I've hit on randoms before. Thanks for the advice.
If you've seen my other posts you know about my views on the matter.
I'm a 27 year old virgin, I've been keeping it that way not only out of morality, and my christianity, but it's a valued thing in a relationship.
You can't expect a girl to be one if you aren't it's redundant in my opinion, and it brings both partners closer, not to mention in theory it should keep you from wanting to sex up every attractive thing that walks by if you've only stuck with your partner.
I'm in to the asian side of the world when it comes to women, but after seeing the chart here its making me think twice about it, only problem is, I'm not attracted to white women, at least not the average ones, sure every race has the 10 out of 10s, but good luck finding a 10 who's a virgin that will go out with a forigner, that could be lack of experience mind you, but I just don't see it, even more so after my experience here in china.
I would be interested in a chart like this for asia though!
Tsar, I'm wondering the same thing. What are you doing in the USA? Why do you want a virgin? Are you a virgin? If you are planning on living in FSU then you may be successful. I don't blame you for wanting to leave the US. I lived in Ukraine for about 8 months and dating many girls. They are beautiful but hardly a pushover. Yes they lie, cheat, and con. Ask Winston about Russia. He spent about 2 years total there. He got robbed, assaulted, girls used him, etc. It will hardly be a cakewalk. The girls don't like weak guys. They will use your weaknesses to exploit you. I have written about 4 post so far about the Ukraine on my website. I may write a book one day from the experiences, because I kept a diary.
http://partytravelsexlove.com/2012/10/1 ... he-conner/
Here is a link to one and the others are easy to find. Read them. You should go through Winston's photo dairies tp get an idea of some of the hardships. There may be actual diaries too. Good luck. Just get over there and do it!
I am a virgin and I am keeping it that way until I find the girl I am seeking. It reflects my moral code and it is also one way to weed out the bad girls (and their dishonorable motives). What I'm doing in America is finishing establishing myself. I'm only 23 so I should have time and I'm not financially ready. It wouldn't be fair to a girl if I went and married her, and was unable to provide and support her. I wouldn't say I'm weak, more like reserved and cautious. I think before I speak or act. I would say I'm definitely not a pushover and I don't spend my money easily. If a girl wants a small gift or token then once in awhile might be okay, but if we're not in a relationship no gifts. My high expectations should add an extra layer of protection and my philosophy is trust must be earned overtime. Clubs and bars are not my style, I'm more of a fine dining kind of person which is more formal and esteemed which I would only take a girl when I know her better. I would prefer to take the girls to cafes, casual restaurants, museums, symphonies, and activities I find desirable. The more aristocratic and regal activities would seem to draw higher quality girls. Statistically girls that go clubbing, drink alcohol, or smoke are more likely to not be a "good girl."
In America, I can assume that being a nice guy makes me seem like a pushover but I'm really not. I will respect others but I will not flatter them, go out of my way to make them happy, or be pushed around by anyone unless it's in my best interest. In regards to a woman, trust and honor is a very big thing for me and I will not be pushed around or instantly be her provider. I don't put women on a pedestal, I'm looking for a girl that is worthy of being with me and deserving of my love. My personality type is INTJ which makes me almost impervious to manipulation because my type is the best at manipulating events to work in our favor, strategic planning, and exposing deceit. I might seem cold to others but inside I'm a great person looking for the right people before I show my emotional side. Rejection doesn't mean much to me because I know my self-worth and I have pride.
When I do move abroad I would like to live in the girl's country. I wouldn't want to keep her away from her family, good girls will likely love their home, and I want to live in a culture that would make me feel at home. I will definitely ask Winston and others about some of their experiences in the FSU.
Tsar, set the goal at 27. I'm 21 and that's where I'm at. If I don't accomplish by 27 I'm screwed. I figure because at 27 you're not a young man anymore and 27 year olds can easily get younger women. After that it gets harder and harder. Or at least it's more looked down on.
How do you dress Tsar? I mean, I'm wearing a track jacket in my avatar and I have a pair of ripped jeans I wear, but when I was a freshman in college I used to dress up. I have a closet full of dress shirts that I'd wear every day and some days I'd even wear a tie. I figured a suit jacket would be pushing it. Still, I was the best dressed in all my classes.
27 is definitely my goal, I am 23 and I can't envision myself being single for another five years. I would be lying if I would say it was easy on my path but my pride and honor is what keeps me going.
I dress highly fashionable. I don't have too many dress clothes but I wear top of the line fashion. I have many fashionable "clubbing" shirts, some fancy designer jeans, a few Christian Audigier hoodies, and a faux fur coat I wear infrequently. I would say I'm one of the best dressed out of all all the guys at my college. I do it because I want to and it makes me feel good about myself. Clothing is one element of appearance and how others perceive you. It's one of the more malleable aspects of physical appearance and it can be used to convey power and sway people to regard you in higher esteem.
Last edited by Tsar on Tue Feb 19, 2013 6:09 am, edited 1 time in total.
I would suggest you date as many American women as possible before going over. The more you know about women the better. The guys that came over that were naive got killed. FSU girls can spot this a mile away and take advantage of it. Learn Russian too, then you'll have access to all the women and not just a small percentage.
Sexual practice? WTF? No just give them the books and a dildo to practice with if she really really wants to. Not give her to some random dude or asshole douchebag and then she becomes used up.
Also no. Japanese families did not usually give their female children books depicting sexual acts and the like. Where the hell are you getting this from? Only low class or very suspect families would do such a thing.
Even I agree to that. You should just talk to women or try to make friends even. The great thing is that once you get most women started talking you only have to listen. So the conversation's like 70%-90% on her just because women are usually more social. Have some banter with the cute cashier girl next time. Or maybe make friends with an FSU girl online. Just helps you be emotionally mature.
You can learn about sex without having f***ed a lot of different people. Sure you may not have had actual experience but you KNOW about it.
In theory and remaining a virgin is better than being a well practiced whore or he-whore who has multiple STDs or STIs. Also, having sex with too many partners before commitment. No having sex with ANYBODY without commitment will undoubtedly lead to bonding issues because sex itself is a form of bonding and expression of love. Why do you think I think NEITHER MEN NOR WOMEN should be sexually promiscuous? It f***s everything up. I'd rather see a society free of STDs and a little sexually deprived at first than a completely sexually free society that has tons of STDs and everyone has bonding and personality and mental problems. Maybe some men can f**k many women but not feel anything, but for women, who are WAAAAY more emotional than men, any sex is EMOTIONAL and causes imprinting and bonding. That is why women who have many sexual partners are USED UP. That's why female whores have been ESPECIALLY HATED, and rightly so.
Also, restraint and discipline, especially in the matter of sex, are hallmarks of civilization while being sexually free is being no better than the "savages" and "barbarians" that all civilized nations and empires have disliked and rightfully so. Being unrestrained is simply being an animal.
Do you not notice that all Western talk is about dominance/submission or being "sexually free" and to be able to "express our natural instincts" or comparing big, tall men to "cavemen who dragged women by the hair back to the caves?"
Well guess what, that's because western civlization, anglo civilization for all of its technology and "culture" are still the descendants of barbarians (and most are still pretty much barbarians) and that is why it is embedded in the culture and genes. The west are not Romans. In fact the Romans would frown upon such promiscuity. The Roman Empire fell right when they were most promiscuous and sexually open and that was when they were most corrupt.
The whole point of civilization is NOT to be like cavemen and NOT to have the "sexual dominance/sexual submission" idiotic type of thinking and TO HAVE DISCIPLINE.
This is why most westerners don't understand East Asian culture at all AND NEVER WILL because most westerners are GENETICALLY BARBARIANS, especially Americans who are the descendants of robbers, nutjobs, highwaymen, religious zealous psychos, murderers, thieves, genocidal scum, peasant trash and filth and refugees etc. e tc..
Between husband and wife in East Asia, only the thugs and LOW LIVES and criminals practice SEXUAL DOMINANCE/SUBMISSION and the BDSM type shit that westerners love so much.
Traditionally, the whole point of culture and civilization was for man and women to be able to play their roles as husband and wife, protector and supporter, etc. etc., but still treating each other EQUALLY, which means there is NO DOMINANT and NO SUBMISSIVE in the relationship between man and wife.
You destroy any ability to form such a connection and for man and woman to play their roles when you screw with one of the most important tools of bonding which is sex.
Add in the element of porn addiction...
Here's a fascinating article about the Middle Ages Winston posted earlier:
http://www.cracked.com/article_20186_6- ... ieves.html
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