It's over, I'm actually Happier-In-North-America

[insanity]

As for being seen as gay, it's difficult to hang out with male friends for this exact reason. I workout daily; I'm reasonably tall 6'1", decent-to-good looking, and am not shy nor withdrawn in public. In fact, I'm rather comfortable in my own skin, with a lot of eclectic interests in life. Thus, everyone's Gaydar is on alert

I think this is really the one thing you are overly paranoid about. Since when does working out and not being shy make you appear gay? I think you really have some kind of an paranoia about this. Just be confident and be yourself. Being friends with a woman just because you are scared people think you are gay is madness and very very "beta". I hate the word "beta" but it really describes this behaviour best. There is nothing more "manly" than doing your own thing without worrying all the time what people think about you.

[insanity]

Male friends, however, don't want this cultural label and thus, there's always this notebook/laptop, etc, floating about showing to the world around us, that we're straight guys talking business when we're at a dinner.

And yes, it does affect your business associations and possibilities of finding contracts/jobs, etc, if your target clients think that you're gay.

It´s all in your head S_Parc. Nobody is going think of you as being gay for eating out with a friend. Why do you worry about this so much? Look around, there are two or more males eating in some restaurant all the time. It´s totally normal. How pathetic is it to bring a laptop to a restaurant just to make people think you are talking business?

[S_Parc]

Male friends, however, don't want this cultural label and thus, there's always this notebook/laptop, etc, floating about showing to the world around us, that we're straight guys talking business when we're at a dinner.

And yes, it does affect your business associations and possibilities of finding contracts/jobs, etc, if your target clients think that you're gay.

It´s all in your head S_Parc. Nobody is going think of you as being gay for eating out with a friend. Why do you worry about this so much? Look around, there are two or more males eating in some restaurant all the time. It´s totally normal. How pathetic is it to bring a laptop to a restaurant just to make people think you are talking business?

Whose notebook do you think it is? ... the other person's.

So is the paranoia in my head or is it around me ?

[insanity]

Whose notebook do you think it is? ... the other person's.

So is the paranoia in my head or is it around me ?

Maybe it´s in your head that the reason for the notebook is paranoia about getting considered gay?

As I have said...You seem to be a really special case as I have never heard of other people behaving like that. Who has ever brought a laptop to a restaurant because they were scared to be considered gay?

[Teal Lantern]

You fellas don't seem to get it, the reason why it works is that her and I don't b@ink.

You'll find most men CAN'T get it.

Most don't have much to say to women they don't find attractive.
This means THEY are always the ones who get friend zoned, and always by women they wanted more than friendship from; that's a constant source of frustration for many.
They waste YEARS getting treated like disposable utilities and competing with the other orbiters.
It also means they never get to friend zone a female (or learn the uses that has)

Most males never learn ANYTHING while in the friend zone other than ... they don't like being there.
Most also figure any woman you're talking to, you must (or should) want to b@ink; any other possibility upsets their frame.

For all these reasons and more, if THEY don't find her attractive, they will express wonder at why YOU are talking to her.
Modern "men" are as bad as the female herd, in some respects.

She's not hot: *Derp* Mane, you couldda done better dan dat. *Derp*
She is hot: *Derp* Mane, why ain't you hittin' dat? I'd be all up .... *Derp*

In H.S., one former friend thought he was being funny, teasing me about a girl I was just friends with (she wasn't hot).
Cut to a couple years later, his H.S. sweetie is frivorcing him & taking his kid. Who's clever, now?

[insanity]

Most also figure any woman you're talking to, you must (or should) want to b@ink; any other possibility upsets their frame.

What if it´s true? I think if a man is really honest about that he will admit it. Do you have any ugly female friends? No? I thought so...

I don´t know any friend of mine that has ugly female friends...

I just don´t see the point of female friends. Most man really don´t find female friends to be a pleasure unless they want to f**k them or become their BF/husband. That´s just the way man are if you take away feminist/mangina non-sense.

To be honest with western woman even a simple conversation is painful. I would have no clue on what to talk about with them. Seriously nothing comes to mind. Might as well talk to some aliens. If I think about the conversations I am forced to have while staying in the west I have to say none of them have been even somewhat pleasant. Often the ugly looking women have even worse attitudes than the pretty ones.

With foreign woman it´s a bit different as it´s somewhat interesting to hear their point of view on things or talk about their home countries but that´s about it. There is also the bonus of not getting their views forced on you. There is nothing more annoying than some western political hipster activist chick

[S_Parc]

This means THEY are always the ones who get friend zoned, and always by women they wanted more than friendship from; that's a constant source of frustration for many.

The entire "pining over a female friend" phase was over at 20 yrs of age for me. For me, that's worse than smoking or being addicted to drugs. At least the latter gives one a few ups (& downs) versus all downs. If I like someone, she'll pretty much know within a short while. If she then proceeds to 'friend zone' me. Well, it's over, I don't give her a second round at romance, even if her bad boy BF dumps her later. Since I'd started going abroad, at the age of 24, that policy has worked out fine. Today, hetero women are orbiting me, as a way of getting me to ask 'em out. I don't fall for it, now that I'm in my 30s and a little wiser.

As for insanity, yes, I've had conversations with physically unattractive women & have made acquaintances with them. For me, it's no different than talking to a guy except that with women, I tend to keep things short (if not a little aloof), as I know that they jump to the wrong conclusions quickly.

Well at least this thread is now turning into a discussion of sorts

[S_Parc]

Wow, I'm glad you've found happiness before robot wives become the only option for most guys. (I'm personally waiting for this to happen).

You have found happiness abroad after all. The only problem I see is your lesbian will eventually find a woman and dispose of you. However, enjoy it while it lasts and maybe it will last for a few years.

I'm really happy for you.

Yeah, the 'bots will be there, but that'll start sometime circa ~2025.

I wasn't exactly planning on this, turning into platonic marriage of sorts. However, if she really doesn't like dating unattractive, aging women, once she's in her 40s, then perhaps this thing can persist.

Today, it's Lesbian pal & then b@inking pros and then perhaps, I'll transition into a Sugar Daddy-Sugar Baby role in my 40s (utilizing various continents) and then, come middle age, the engineers will have the 'bots ready for mainstream use.

[S_Parc]

Does anyone remember from 20 years ago, a flash in the pan band called The Breeders?

There are biological twin sisters, Kim and Kelley Deal, in the band. Kim's the lead singer/acoustic rhythm guitar player and Kelley, backup vocals/lead guitarist. Both women are clearly beautiful (& they're biologically the same), however, Kim being completely man-ish, is basically undesirable whereas Kelley, the "dolled up one" is practically a female wallflower. Now, as a man, I wouldn't mind doing Kelley (I mean she is gorgeous), however Kim, on the other shoe, may attempt to bite off my salami during oral so I wouldn't even think about it. Plus, her manliness is a turn off. In fact, I remember one reviewer, back in '93, giving her a scathing comment ... "Kim, take a bath!"



Aside from the handsome/fit drummer getting his big musical break here, how much would you bet that he wasn't getting any, from any of the gals in this band?

[zboy1]

S_Parc, nice retro music video. I remember the Breeders well back in the day. I miss the alternative music scene from back in the 80s and 90s. It was mostly good stuff...and listening to the radio was a half-decent thing to do, not like today...

[xiongmao]

Let's get the Happier Back Home movement started!

Though I think it would be too strange to go home now after living abroad for a while. I might do something stupid and try to bar fine the waitress in my local bar or something!!!

[S_Parc]

Ok fellas, experiment number two results are...

This past weekend, we got ourselves a two bedroom suite and two esc@rt/dancers. They did a little Stag Party for us, grinding it out to classic rock/heavy metal (you know... Deep Purple, Manowar, Metallica). Then, when the grinding was done, we tossed a coin and each took one back to the private room for a massive b*ink.

It's Monday and I find myself relaxed and happy, doing my work. I'm also listening to some Deep Purple, reminiscing a bit This gives 'Highway Star' and 'Burn', a whole new meaning.

[Jeremy]

I don't think most guys care that much about f***ing their female friends. It seems like they just want the social status that comes from being seem with attractive girls. Sex would merely be a bonus.

[Billy]

maybe we need a happier at home section as most of the users will practically need those advice much more.

[S_Parc]

maybe we need a happier at home section as most of the users will practically need those advice much more.

Well that's just the thing, I had my romp, and then, moved onto a short term business trip. It felt kinda seamless whereas in the past, being at home for a weekend, and then going to another town/city for the *same old same old* Americana thing, was a bit depressing.

I mean there's probably a chance I'll be meeting up with some typical "Joe Blow" Americans at a TGIF, for drinks and talking business/American sports nonsense, a bit later on or tomorrow, but that doesn't matter. Work is work but now, my free time is kinda my own special time.