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Would You Marry Someone from outside Your Faith?

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Would You Marry Someone from outside Your Faith?

Postby zacb » Mon Sep 30, 2013 1:23 pm

I am having a difficulty. The people within my faith are no more practitioners of my faith (Christianity) than the people outside it, and the people outside are more practitioners of it than my fellow "brethren" (more outside the Anglosphere). So How do you square that with marriage? I am having a difficulty with this. There is this one women I have been chatting with, that is so sweet, and we just click (and her mother and father have middle class jobs, I think one is a manager, another is some type of maintenance I believe). She is from Mexico, and as soon as I have money for a tour, I am packing up myself and going down there to visit (over summer break probably). The only issue is she is not sure how to approach God, and her family is Catholic, but probably more culturally. I love her dearly, and she me, but this issue bugs me. The church and it's followers seem no different than the feminist, and many are similar to the believers should avoid. This leads me to an em pass. Should I marry a moral girl that has more care, or a supposed Christian?
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Re: Would You Marry Someone from outside Your Faith?

Postby kai1275 » Mon Sep 30, 2013 2:59 pm

zacb wrote:I am having a difficulty. The people within my faith are no more practitioners of my faith (Christianity) than the people outside it, and the people outside are more practitioners of it than my fellow "brethren" (more outside the Anglosphere). So How do you square that with marriage? I am having a difficulty with this. There is this one women I have been chatting with, that is so sweet, and we just click (and her mother and father have middle class jobs, I think one is a manager, another is some type of maintenance I believe). She is from Mexico, and as soon as I have money for a tour, I am packing up myself and going down there to visit (over summer break probably). The only issue is she is not sure how to approach God, and her family is Catholic, but probably more culturally. I love her dearly, and she me, but this issue bugs me. The church and it's followers seem no different than the feminist, and many are similar to the believers should avoid. This leads me to an em pass. Should I marry a moral girl that has more care, or a supposed Christian?


I understand your pain. I went through this with my wife. Still ongoing in a way actually. I am a non-religious Christian (non-denominational), but not a liberal/Unitarian type. She is Chinese and not a believer in anything really. I spoke about my faith on and off, and let her see the love of Christ in my actions. She believes in God, she knows he exists due to some things(miracles) that happened a certain way before we got married, but she still is not too sure about how Christianity itself works and is a little conflicted, but she goes to church with me but bible study is strange, due to Chinese Christians having certain elements that only a baby Christian have. Language and Chinese bible translations is not always great because of translation limitations. I think she will eventually understand it and that is my prayer. I am just continuing to walk in love and show her the Christ in me.

Often times people are not sure of Christ because of the multitude of terrible and hateful idiots running around throwing their faith in other's faces and trying to force our laws to become Christian laws and a Christian country, which it never has been. I would not have a hard time talking to her about Christ if it was not for the shitty reputation of Modern Christianity.

I say, pray about it and see where the Lord leads you. Ask for guidance. See if that is the person he has set aside for you to be with as well.
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Re: Would You Marry Someone from outside Your Faith?

Postby zboy1 » Mon Sep 30, 2013 11:14 pm

kai1275 wrote:
zacb wrote:I am having a difficulty. The people within my faith are no more practitioners of my faith (Christianity) than the people outside it, and the people outside are more practitioners of it than my fellow "brethren" (more outside the Anglosphere). So How do you square that with marriage? I am having a difficulty with this. There is this one women I have been chatting with, that is so sweet, and we just click (and her mother and father have middle class jobs, I think one is a manager, another is some type of maintenance I believe). She is from Mexico, and as soon as I have money for a tour, I am packing up myself and going down there to visit (over summer break probably). The only issue is she is not sure how to approach God, and her family is Catholic, but probably more culturally. I love her dearly, and she me, but this issue bugs me. The church and it's followers seem no different than the feminist, and many are similar to the believers should avoid. This leads me to an em pass. Should I marry a moral girl that has more care, or a supposed Christian?


I understand your pain. I went through this with my wife. Still ongoing in a way actually. I am a non-religious Christian (non-denominational), but not a liberal/Unitarian type. She is Chinese and not a believer in anything really. I spoke about my faith on and off, and let her see the love of Christ in my actions. She believes in God, she knows he exists due to some things(miracles) that happened a certain way before we got married, but she still is not too sure about how Christianity itself works and is a little conflicted, but she goes to church with me but bible study is strange, due to Chinese Christians having certain elements that only a baby Christian have. Language and Chinese bible translations is not always great because of translation limitations. I think she will eventually understand it and that is my prayer. I am just continuing to walk in love and show her the Christ in me.

Often times people are not sure of Christ because of the multitude of terrible and hateful idiots running around throwing their faith in other's faces and trying to force our laws to become Christian laws and a Christian country, which it never has been. I would not have a hard time talking to her about Christ if it was not for the shitty reputation of Modern Christianity.

I say, pray about it and see where the Lord leads you. Ask for guidance. See if that is the person he has set aside for you to be with as well.


Yes, my thoughts exactly. Nice post Kai. The "hateful idiot" Christians like Pat Robertson, Kirk Cameron, Rick Santorum and Jerry Falwell has made Christians look like total jerks and imbeciles...and the big reason why many young people no longer consider themselves Christian or religious.

Why aren't there more tolerant Christians like a Ron Paul or someone like that...? Stay out of the bedroom and social issues, and concentrate on preaching to the uninitiated and unsaved instead. Better use of resources, I say...
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Postby zboy1 » Mon Sep 30, 2013 11:19 pm

ZachB, you should go ahead and have a relationship with that Mexican women. I don't think religion would be that big-of-a-deal, tbh. I think most foreign women can look beyond that...I believe...
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Postby zacb » Tue Oct 01, 2013 3:41 am

True zboy. I think we have more in common than I do with most Christians. It is weird. Now the only issue is if we get married, how to skirt around the issue with my mom. I am thinking just try and avoid the issue and say she is Catholic (which her family is). What do you think?
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Postby magnum » Tue Oct 01, 2013 4:02 am

The girl I'm currently dating and plan to marry if I can pull my self out of my financial situation isn't christian.



she thinks Christianity is a joke yet on the flip side she has shown me more kindness then any whore of a American ever did, so you do the math.


Christian who acts exactly the same as any other person except they might sing a song every Sunday, or a person of higher intellect who treats you more attuned to what a partner should.


That's not to say every christian is like this, I'm speaking of the "wrongly named" Christians that reside in America.

I think we should change the name Christian in America to "Sundayers" to stop confusing people who might actually want salvation rather then a get out of guilt free card and free Donuts.

Besides you can always slowly work in the faith like Kai is doing, that's my plan if I am lucky enough to wed my treasure.
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Postby Teal Lantern » Tue Oct 01, 2013 4:59 am

magnum wrote:The girl I'm currently dating and plan to marry if I can pull my self out of my financial situation isn't christian.



she thinks Christianity is a joke yet on the flip side she has shown me more kindness then any whore of a American ever did, so you do the math.


Christian who acts exactly the same as any other person except they might sing a song every Sunday, or a person of higher intellect who treats you more attuned to what a partner should.


That's not to say every christian is like this, I'm speaking of the "wrongly named" Christians that reside in America.

I think we should change the name Christian in America to "Sundayers" to stop confusing people who might actually want salvation rather then a get out of guilt free card and free Donuts.

Besides you can always slowly work in the faith like Kai is doing, that's my plan if I am lucky enough to wed my treasure.

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Postby magnum » Tue Oct 01, 2013 8:05 am

Thank you for that tasty vocabulary upgrade. :twisted:
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Postby zacb » Tue Oct 01, 2013 2:45 pm

I thing I will call my former comrades that XD .... Not sure how they will receive that :D .
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Postby FinnMonash » Sat Oct 05, 2013 11:37 am

zboy1 wrote:ZachB, you should go ahead and have a relationship with that Mexican women. I don't think religion would be that big-of-a-deal, tbh. I think most foreign women can look beyond that...I believe...

I am also agree with you. He really must go ahead. If they both will be together from their heart than no religion or any other thing will come in between their way.
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Re: Would You Marry Someone from outside Your Faith?

Postby Raja » Wed Oct 09, 2013 2:01 pm

zacb wrote:I am having a difficulty. The people within my faith are no more practitioners of my faith (Christianity) than the people outside it, and the people outside are more practitioners of it than my fellow "brethren" (more outside the Anglosphere). So How do you square that with marriage? I am having a difficulty with this. There is this one women I have been chatting with, that is so sweet, and we just click (and her mother and father have middle class jobs, I think one is a manager, another is some type of maintenance I believe). She is from Mexico, and as soon as I have money for a tour, I am packing up myself and going down there to visit (over summer break probably). The only issue is she is not sure how to approach God, and her family is Catholic, but probably more culturally. I love her dearly, and she me, but this issue bugs me. The church and it's followers seem no different than the feminist, and many are similar to the believers should avoid. This leads me to an em pass. Should I marry a moral girl that has more care, or a supposed Christian?

So at this point she is nominally Catholic?

I would say if you believe yourself to be of separate faiths rather then taking a separate path and rituals of the same faith then it is time to ask yourself are you as "culturally" Christian as you think her family may be culturally Catholic. In the end if either of you find yourselfs on the fundamentalist, my way or the highway side of the spectrum then do not pursue. Join a site which specialists in your particular sect of Christianity and accept that most of the world is unavailable to you because you will be unequally yoked.
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Re: Would You Marry Someone from outside Your Faith?

Postby zacb » Wed Oct 09, 2013 4:50 pm

Raja wrote:
zacb wrote:I am having a difficulty. The people within my faith are no more practitioners of my faith (Christianity) than the people outside it, and the people outside are more practitioners of it than my fellow "brethren" (more outside the Anglosphere). So How do you square that with marriage? I am having a difficulty with this. There is this one women I have been chatting with, that is so sweet, and we just click (and her mother and father have middle class jobs, I think one is a manager, another is some type of maintenance I believe). She is from Mexico, and as soon as I have money for a tour, I am packing up myself and going down there to visit (over summer break probably). The only issue is she is not sure how to approach God, and her family is Catholic, but probably more culturally. I love her dearly, and she me, but this issue bugs me. The church and it's followers seem no different than the feminist, and many are similar to the believers should avoid. This leads me to an em pass. Should I marry a moral girl that has more care, or a supposed Christian?

So at this point she is nominally Catholic?

I would say if you believe yourself to be of separate faiths rather then taking a separate path and rituals of the same faith then it is time to ask yourself are you as "culturally" Christian as you think her family may be culturally Catholic. In the end if either of you find yourselfs on the fundamentalist, my way or the highway side of the spectrum then do not pursue. Join a site which specialists in your particular sect of Christianity and accept that most of the world is unavailable to you because you will be unequally yoked.


It would think of he rmore as secular, although she wa sbrought up at least somewhat catholic. She is sympathetic to christianity, and has traditional views on the family. I am no ta denominal guy, although I believe the basics, I would lean more quaker if pressed. I believe in a mor epeaceful gospel, that was against aggression, and spoke well of individual cooperation and responsibility. Still sorting out child rearing.
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Postby Raja » Wed Oct 09, 2013 10:49 pm

Well if you lean more Quaker then it would be the level of her faith which will be the determining factor. While you may never baptize she will need a priest. While you may sit quietly in a meeting she will have mandatory Mass attendance with certain rituals expected of her in order for her to receiver sacraments.

Of course there are the big family and sexual rules she is nominally bound to follow which most Catholics do not. But in the end as someone who leans Quaker i can't see you having a problem unless she is actually following the orders of her Bishop.
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Postby zacb » Wed Oct 09, 2013 11:55 pm

I think she is more cultural, but not per se practicing. More like she likes the morals of it, but not necessarily be a Catholic. To put this in perspective, she does not care about birth control or such. So I don't think she is serious about the tradition. I think she pulled some things from her former religion, but she is not a Catholic. Get what I mean mate?
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