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Depressed or Apathetic?

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Depressed or Apathetic?

Postby zacb » Thu Oct 24, 2013 3:58 am

Maybe it is just me, but I am worn out. I have been trying to apply for work, and not much has changed in my area. I have been talking with a girl, but as of late she has seemed kinda busy. There is not much to do where I am, and so I have been reading and going to school and working on making a little Amazon business. Maybe it is me, but I am plain disillusioned about normalcy, and I am questioning my own reality. I feel a mix between depression, apathy, stoicism, and just loathing of the life around me. I go on facebook and another forum, and it is bitching about this or that. Is there more than this? If my relationship or what not does not turn out with this one girl, I am thinking of visiting a few places (Thailand, Philippines, Mexico) and deciding on a residence. I want to be with my own kind, entrepreneurs, free spirits, intellectuals, not all this stifling around me. Anyone else like this? Do you feel a general detachment from society, and not take interest in things as much?
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Postby SilverEnergy » Thu Oct 24, 2013 3:59 pm

If you want to find motivation to the things in life you want to do, online forums are not the way to go.

You have to find some kind of community of entrepreneurs and investors who you can learn from and absorb from.

That's why I suggested seeking a life coach or a business/investing mentor who can guide you.

I think a lot of you are afraid to seek help for reasons that I know not.

There's help out there if you want it.

Maybe what you need is to really go overseas at this point because maybe American society is just wearing you out too much.

As for myself, I'm going to seek out all the help and advice from successful people in America and then use this to live my dream in America and overseas.

Have you thought about teaching English overseas?

Once again, 99.9 percent of people in online forums and website such as this are not qualified to give you life changing advice and direction.

Either go overseas or if you want to do business/investing in America then seek profession guidance from a life coach or a business/investing mentor.

Heck, if you need to see a therapist, do so.

Don't let your ego or pride keep you from seeking help outside of the internet.

Don't hide on the internet as a way to avoid finding help for your problems.

It requires an humble attitude to admit you can't solve all of your problems on your own and to seek advice from those who are qualified to give it.

If you don't want to pursue your dreams and ambitions, you might need to admit to yourself that you don't have big aspirations and that's OKAY.

There's NOTHING wrong with wanting just enough in life to get by.

Maybe business/investing isn't for you and that's OKAY.
"Allow me to show you the Power Cosmic!" - Silver Surfer
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Re: Depressed or Apathetic?

Postby tre » Thu Oct 24, 2013 5:40 pm

zacb wrote:Maybe it is just me, but I am worn out. I have been trying to apply for work, and not much has changed in my area. I have been talking with a girl, but as of late she has seemed kinda busy. There is not much to do where I am, and so I have been reading and going to school and working on making a little Amazon business. Maybe it is me, but I am plain disillusioned about normalcy, and I am questioning my own reality. I feel a mix between depression, apathy, stoicism, and just loathing of the life around me. I go on facebook and another forum, and it is bitching about this or that. Is there more than this? If my relationship or what not does not turn out with this one girl, I am thinking of visiting a few places (Thailand, Philippines, Mexico) and deciding on a residence. I want to be with my own kind, entrepreneurs, free spirits, intellectuals, not all this stifling around me. Anyone else like this? Do you feel a general detachment from society, and not take interest in things as much?


YES! After quitting my well-paid bartender job and investing most of my life savings into a business abroad and then LOSING it all...I definitely feel worn out. However, I'm older than you are so my options are more limited now. I was a bartender, which isn't something I can do anywhere outside of where I did it and still make good $$. Problem is, I'm too old to get the jobs I used to get.

So now what? I've been researching careers, but I have to be realistic about my age. If I get a degree in something that is useful (such as Engineering or Comp. Science), I'll be in my 40's when I graduate. I'd then have no experience and....I'm in my 40's. I can't lie to myself and tell myself that this doesn't matter...I know it does. Also, the media has been blasting out that Engineering and Computer Science degrees are the way to go. There have been many articles posted on Yahoo about this over the past year or so...in everyone's face. Now there are reports that there are too many applicants in those fields of study. If everyone goes into those fields, they will obviously become less lucrative. A lot of research must be done in order to find the right field and you can't trust the media to help in any way.

A friend of mine has recently started up a company (it's been in process for 3 years) and wants to hire me as soon as he needs to hire. It's looking very promising. I would be hired based on our relationship of trust. He doesn't want to hire anyone he doesn't trust no matter their qualifications due to government regulations and law. I think this will be a more important factor in the future due to our intrusive government.

It seems that success is based a lot on who you know and who knows you....not on what you know. The best paid job I ever had was given to me because of connections I had. There are many qualified people sitting unemployed right now. In many ways, it's better to be a good, trustworthy person with connections that know you and your qualities than a very qualified one.

The "life coaches" I know are losers that use that position to make money due to their lack of success in other areas. I'm sure there are really good life coaches, but I'd rather rub shoulders with an extremely wealthy businessman any day. I'd rather be around those that know more than I do and who can provide a wealth of knowledge about being successful. Also, they just might like you and respect you for a qualities that you possess....and give you a job.

Like many have said here, degrees are becoming more and more difficult to justify. They are expensive and you REALLY have to have a strategy in order to get a position after graduation. At the same time, life in the USA is getting more and more frustrating to those that have their eyes open to what is going on.

If you can't find a way to move abroad, then definitely take some trips as often as you can. They REALLY help clear your mind of the BS here....I can't tell you how great it felt.
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Re: Depressed or Apathetic?

Postby fschmidt » Thu Oct 24, 2013 7:22 pm

zacb wrote:Is there more than this? If my relationship or what not does not turn out with this one girl, I am thinking of visiting a few places (Thailand, Philippines, Mexico) and deciding on a residence. I want to be with my own kind, entrepreneurs, free spirits, intellectuals, not all this stifling around me. Anyone else like this?

I think everyone on this forum is like this to some degree. The question is what more one wants. If you are happy with friendly people and easy sex, then you will easily be happier abroad. But don't expect entrepreneurs and intellectuals in most countries. And especially, don't expect honesty and trustworthiness. It's because I want these things that I am interested in projects like CoAlpha and Biblic Judaism.
Following the Old Testament, not evil modern culture
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Re: Depressed or Apathetic?

Postby S_Parc » Thu Oct 24, 2013 9:11 pm

tre wrote:So now what? I've been researching careers, but I have to be realistic about my age. If I get a degree in something that is useful (such as Engineering or Comp. Science), I'll be in my 40's when I graduate. I'd then have no experience and....I'm in my 40's. I can't lie to myself and tell myself that this doesn't matter...I know it does. Also, the media has been blasting out that Engineering and Computer Science degrees are the way to go.


If you're 40, really, the only thing you can do academically, and still find work is in health care.

And yes, I knew folks who went to medical school, starting in their mid-30s to late-40s. All of them are employed today. In medicine, being older is an advantage as patients assumed that you'd been working in health care for all of those years. If you're an American, you can also study medicine abroad and still take the foreign student version (FMG) of the USMLE board exams, if you're worried about the huge stateside loans. Of course, it means that w/o a great score, your chances of an American residency go down. Still, there many be some native American reservations left, if you're willing to start at the bottom.

As for ancillary health care areas, like nursing, PA, physical therapist, etc, you'll have to do the research on the number of ppl entering the field vs interning opportunities, once they're in. I suspect that PAs will still have work, given the fact that there's a queue to see an internal medicine/GP doctor these days. As for non-traditional areas like chiropractic or acupuncture, those areas don't have a pre-made jobs pipeline so you're pretty much an entrepreneur from the start.

I'd stay away from engineering, law, accounting, and those types of degrees. Those programs were designed with 27-32 year olds in mind, as one is expected to be seasoned, come 40, and ready for a managerial or specialist role in the latter years. So a green 40 year old graduate is typically not very marketable. Of course, there's always being a self-employed contractor/consultant in these areas but I'm yet to meet a successful one, who didn't put in some years of experience somewhere, before striking out on his own.
16 years ago, the Best Picture of 1999, "American Beauty", telegraphed the message of Happier Abroad to the world.

Beware of long term engagements with AWs, you may find yourself in a coffin.

AB discussion thread

BTW, despite settling down with an AW, myself, the warning is still in effect.
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Postby zacb » Fri Oct 25, 2013 4:39 am

SilverEnergy wrote:If you want to find motivation to the things in life you want to do, online forums are not the way to go.

You have to find some kind of community of entrepreneurs and investors who you can learn from and absorb from.

That's why I suggested seeking a life coach or a business/investing mentor who can guide you.

I think a lot of you are afraid to seek help for reasons that I know not.

There's help out there if you want it.

Maybe what you need is to really go overseas at this point because maybe American society is just wearing you out too much.

As for myself, I'm going to seek out all the help and advice from successful people in America and then use this to live my dream in America and overseas.

Have you thought about teaching English overseas?

Once again, 99.9 percent of people in online forums and website such as this are not qualified to give you life changing advice and direction.

Either go overseas or if you want to do business/investing in America then seek profession guidance from a life coach or a business/investing mentor.

Heck, if you need to see a therapist, do so.

Don't let your ego or pride keep you from seeking help outside of the internet.

Don't hide on the internet as a way to avoid finding help for your problems.

It requires an humble attitude to admit you can't solve all of your problems on your own and to seek advice from those who are qualified to give it.

If you don't want to pursue your dreams and ambitions, you might need to admit to yourself that you don't have big aspirations and that's OKAY.

There's NOTHING wrong with wanting just enough in life to get by.

Maybe business/investing isn't for you and that's OKAY.


(I know you were not just directing that at me)I have sought professional help in relations to my health. All said in the long run I will be fine. True, but what about in the mean time, where I feel like busting a nerve. And as for the investing, I talked with a teacher today, and her advice was a tad generic about real estate, that being going to real estate school, and buying foreclosures. And I do have big dreams, I am not sure which to pursue (be monogamous and traditional, or going poly and living it up). I have places I want to visit, businesses I want to build, etc. I guess it is just finishing this school year, then I am leaving this behind and moving across state, and getting involved, saving up, and buying some real estate. I just feel sapped from being around here. I plan on moving out in June, and hopefully I can pound the pavement and find some work. Then I can start building an investment portfolio, then I can live off it, and move somewhere where it is cheaper to live, and live large on less.
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Postby magnum » Fri Oct 25, 2013 5:03 am

you seriously need to hear my words....


Though at the moment I'm not happy due to my heart being mocked and ripped out, I will say this.


The time I spent in china out of the usa gave me perspective and changed who i was and made me a better person, and that was only for a month.


Believe me, take the trip, and even better if you have a girl friend you can stay with for free, stay for as long as you can out of country, up to a month if you can.

You will be a changed man or at least a better one, I know I was.

Do it, what do you have to lose but your current lack of happiness, if you have the money and the contacts, make it happen.

God knows I'd be out of this country right now if I had the money.
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Postby zacb » Fri Oct 25, 2013 5:09 am

Thanks magnum. The only thing I need is money. But first, I must escape this rabbit hole that I am living at, and live on my own. Then I will start saving and visiting a few countries. Then when I have the money, I will live off that capital base and move permanently, especially if I don't have a new base in the new city. The city I am currently in has no jobs. Thus, I am going where there is more so I can permanently move abroad. Thanks for your inspiration. It is not a matter of if, just when. Once I have the money to visit, I am going down there.
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Re: Depressed or Apathetic?

Postby tre » Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:27 am

S_Parc wrote:
If you're 40, really, the only thing you can do academically, and still find work is in health care.

And yes, I knew folks who went to medical school, starting in their mid-30s to late-40s. All of them are employed today. In medicine, being older is an advantage as patients assumed that you'd been working in health care for all of those years. If you're an American, you can also study medicine abroad and still take the foreign student version (FMG) of the USMLE board exams, if you're worried about the huge stateside loans. Of course, it means that w/o a great score, your chances of an American residency go down. Still, there many be some native American reservations left, if you're willing to start at the bottom.

As for ancillary health care areas, like nursing, PA, physical therapist, etc, you'll have to do the research on the number of ppl entering the field vs interning opportunities, once they're in. I suspect that PAs will still have work, given the fact that there's a queue to see an internal medicine/GP doctor these days. As for non-traditional areas like chiropractic or acupuncture, those areas don't have a pre-made jobs pipeline so you're pretty much an entrepreneur from the start.

I'd stay away from engineering, law, accounting, and those types of degrees. Those programs were designed with 27-32 year olds in mind, as one is expected to be seasoned, come 40, and ready for a managerial or specialist role in the latter years. So a green 40 year old graduate is typically not very marketable. Of course, there's always being a self-employed contractor/consultant in these areas but I'm yet to meet a successful one, who didn't put in some years of experience somewhere, before striking out on his own.


You are probably right and thanks for the suggestions. The problem is that I wouldn't like the medical field. I don't have the stomach or compassion for it and I REALLY want to avoid anything dealing with customer service as I've done that most of my life and I hate it. I've thought of perhaps becoming a Pharmacist, but that is so similar to being a bartender....just different drugs...lol. They are both high-volume customer service jobs, but pharmacy customers are likely more grouchy. However, I would have a Pharmacy Tech and Cashier that could deal with a lot of the customer service BS. Pharmacist would likely be the only thing I'd consider in the medical field. The ironic thing is...that's what I'd planned on doing 15 years ago. I wasn't 100% sure though so I stopped and went to work instead....mistake. I would have been good at it...maybe I still could be. I think one problem may be just how many people are going into THAT field as well. I know many that are so competition is likely fierce. It is also my understanding that being a Pharmacist won't take you abroad...at least not easily. It just sucks to be approaching 40 and have to contemplate these types of things....shoulda, coulda, woulda.

I've mostly seen my ideal job as one that involves working as far away from people as I can and doing a task alone. I prefer to deal with people when I WANT to and not when I HAVE to. I like people in general more if I'm not forced to be around them all the time. I hated how I felt about people when I was a bartender....I really started to hate humanity. I like people, in general, more now and I want it to stay that way.

There have been a few posts I have found in a few threads here that have a good argument AGAINST going into Engineering/Computer Science these days...especially if you are older. This info just might have saved me over $50K, 6 years of tough study, and severe anxiety....for very little return. Thanks for that
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Re: Depressed or Apathetic?

Postby S_Parc » Fri Oct 25, 2013 2:10 pm

tre wrote:I think one problem may be just how many people are going into THAT field as well. I know many that are so competition is likely fierce. It is also my understanding that being a Pharmacist won't take you abroad...at least not easily. It just sucks to be approaching 40 and have to contemplate these types of things....shoulda, coulda, woulda.

I've mostly seen my ideal job as one that involves working as far away from people as I can and doing a task alone. I prefer to deal with people when I WANT to and not when I HAVE to. I like people in general more if I'm not forced to be around them all the time. I hated how I felt about people when I was a bartender....I really started to hate humanity. I like people, in general, more now and I want it to stay that way.

There have been a few posts I have found in a few threads here that have a good argument AGAINST going into Engineering/Computer Science these days...especially if you are older. This info just might have saved me over $50K, 6 years of tough study, and severe anxiety....for very little return. Thanks for that


Well, for the time being, Pharmacists are limited by the number of slots in PharmD programs. That could change. As for medicine/medical school, the careers of Anesthesiologists or Pathologists have little actual day-to-day consultations with patients, albeit, as an Anesthesiologist, you do put 'em to sleep in OR.

And yes, avoid all and any thing called 'Engineering'. Here's an anecdote... I once knew a guy in his late 30s; he went to college for chemical engineering. In his class, he was called 'uncle' by his classmates, who were all ages 18 to 25. Prior to starting at the university, he was running a family owned, successful restaurant in western Mass. During his time at school, his in-laws were taking care of the day-to-day tasks for the business. After graduation, he got zippo from all companies: energy, chemicals, biotech, etc. In fact, he couldn't even find a lab assistant internship, as even those had younger postdocs applying, just to get out of the academy. The end result was that his BS Chemical Engineering diploma was hanging in the office of the restaurant, as he went back to his prior work. And for some reason, he's proud of that achievement because it shows to his family that he's a smart guy even though it got him squat. For the life of me, I don't understand that type of need for ego satiation, I'd prefer a career or compensation over some empty symbol of intellectual prestige.

The other area, accounting, however, has a sliver of possibility. The aforementioned chemical engineer above, should have done that. Nowadays, it takes little audit hours/experience, to sit for the CPA exam. So if you have the ability to pass that exam, and provided that you can get some volunteer experience doing someone's books for them, you can break into that field, with less risk of a career implosion. The thing here is that you're kinda of an entrepreneur, as traditional firms like Ernst & Young don't take in older applicants. You'll have to get clients on your own and then perhaps later, find a controller position at some company. And once you're in charge of a firm's cash flow and capital, you'll have a stable career, even if you need to change jobs later. On the other hand, if you don't feel like that you can pass the CPA, don't go into the field. A non-CPA accountant cannot farm themselves out.
16 years ago, the Best Picture of 1999, "American Beauty", telegraphed the message of Happier Abroad to the world.

Beware of long term engagements with AWs, you may find yourself in a coffin.

AB discussion thread

BTW, despite settling down with an AW, myself, the warning is still in effect.
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Postby Ghost » Fri Oct 25, 2013 2:22 pm

Long term thinking. Keep your dreams clear in your mind, and know that they may take months or more to realize, but keep your thoughts on them. Sometimes your dreams are all you have (and let's hope you also have some family and friends as well.) Keep your dreams close but get used to long term thinking. Not being able to make progress or see progress on any given day is disheartening, but you have to trust that things will add up and get you there eventually if you keep at it.

At the same time I think you need to keep modest goals along the way. There's nothing wrong with eventually wanting to make your first million, say. But don't make that the one goal. Set a goal of $10,000, say, and go to the next "checkpoint" to speak afterwards. Likewise, if you are going to school, focus on gaining knowledge and wisdom day to day that will eventually culminate in some credentials.

I would also add, and this is perhaps the most difficult for me, but sleep and eat well! Not only will it give you energy to accomplish things, it will keep things in rhythm and balance. I know too many nights I've stayed up until 2 or 3 am researching things on the internet trying to figure out what I should do. It's not good to do things like that.
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Postby SilverEnergy » Fri Oct 25, 2013 2:44 pm

zacb wrote:
SilverEnergy wrote:If you want to find motivation to the things in life you want to do, online forums are not the way to go.

You have to find some kind of community of entrepreneurs and investors who you can learn from and absorb from.

That's why I suggested seeking a life coach or a business/investing mentor who can guide you.

I think a lot of you are afraid to seek help for reasons that I know not.

There's help out there if you want it.

Maybe what you need is to really go overseas at this point because maybe American society is just wearing you out too much.

As for myself, I'm going to seek out all the help and advice from successful people in America and then use this to live my dream in America and overseas.

Have you thought about teaching English overseas?

Once again, 99.9 percent of people in online forums and website such as this are not qualified to give you life changing advice and direction.

Either go overseas or if you want to do business/investing in America then seek profession guidance from a life coach or a business/investing mentor.

Heck, if you need to see a therapist, do so.

Don't let your ego or pride keep you from seeking help outside of the internet.

Don't hide on the internet as a way to avoid finding help for your problems.

It requires an humble attitude to admit you can't solve all of your problems on your own and to seek advice from those who are qualified to give it.

If you don't want to pursue your dreams and ambitions, you might need to admit to yourself that you don't have big aspirations and that's OKAY.

There's NOTHING wrong with wanting just enough in life to get by.

Maybe business/investing isn't for you and that's OKAY.


(I know you were not just directing that at me)I have sought professional help in relations to my health. All said in the long run I will be fine. True, but what about in the mean time, where I feel like busting a nerve. And as for the investing, I talked with a teacher today, and her advice was a tad generic about real estate, that being going to real estate school, and buying foreclosures. And I do have big dreams, I am not sure which to pursue (be monogamous and traditional, or going poly and living it up). I have places I want to visit, businesses I want to build, etc. I guess it is just finishing this school year, then I am leaving this behind and moving across state, and getting involved, saving up, and buying some real estate. I just feel sapped from being around here. I plan on moving out in June, and hopefully I can pound the pavement and find some work. Then I can start building an investment portfolio, then I can live off it, and move somewhere where it is cheaper to live, and live large on less.


You lack direction, guidance and a clear plan.

While you are waiting to move in June, you could still be taking action towards something.

Because you don't want to start suffering from what's known as "paralysis of analysis".

Look up that term if you don't know what it means.

Because you might already be suffering from "paralysis of analysis" as many people are.
"Allow me to show you the Power Cosmic!" - Silver Surfer
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Postby djfourmoney » Mon Oct 28, 2013 6:59 am

Tre, man I'm 43. I could get back into DJ'ing for people even with all the competition because I understand programing and a kid playing trance won't.

But I really don't want to deal with playing corny beats for mostly White audiences to frankly more often than not like corny beats. The pay is good, but overall its wack.

So I am blogging about things I am passionate about. If some dude can make a ton of money doing Walkthroughs of games on YouTube - http://www.youtube.com/user/theRadBrad then I can talk about road racing series in America and beyond.

I get about 40-50 hits per post right now and I haven't kicked it into high gear yet.

One of the keys to expanding that blog and the others is qualifying for disability because my other income options aren't that good and would take me out of the house 8-10 hours a day using public transportation and away from news I need to respond too, sometimes same day.

We'll see, if not then I'll be spending the majority of next year saving for plane ticket and maybe a month's savings and be on my way, somehow make it work, I will be 44 next year, I don't want to keep putting this off for financial reasons.
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