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I had a talk with my buddy's dad earlier this year about AW. I told him women in this country seem to reject men who want to make them feel loved and wanted. He said that wasn't true and that that's all women want is to be loved.
When they talk about certain superficial things a man has to have before they can even date a man tells me that being loved is not the primary focus. Also, if their main desire was to be loved, then why are between 66% and 90% of divorces initiated by women?
My buddy's sister was saying Sunday that a lot of women are just very picky and won't give a man a chance if he doesn't match the image that they have in their heads of what they want. So is it about love?
What do you guys think?
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In this regard... I think I agree with you, but on the flip side a lot of men are the same way.
If I wanted love and only love, I could find that in a fat woman on the street in under 3 seconds, the catch 22 is....women can find that in a decent to model looking man who's rich any second they want.
So that makes the normal mens value zero, where is in America a attractive man who's well off would still have to battle or date a uglysih girl.
I want love, but I wont accept it from a woman who isn't considered attractive, that's the flat truth of it, but that's my personal need, that isn't to say all men are like this.
Women are just given too many options, so love isn't even the question as they feel they can get that any moment they want, so sure they want love, but it isn't something hard to find, at least in the sick head of a feminist.
They probably do want love, but they are hard-wired to seek status among their peer group and reproductive success first, which in practice in the West means spreading their legs for dirtbags and distaining decent men who might be inclined to love them if they weren't so vile. The fact that they miss out on love is probably one of the reasons they become so hateful and bitter.
I think you're all right in one way or the other. Relationships have become toxic. It's a battle sometimes. Everyone wants to fall in love & be loved but it's like the world fights us sometimes.
OTB there are so many prerequisites girls require a guy to have in order to be dateable .. It takes away from the romance & they end up having lots of missed opportunities. For example; The guys here are becoming burdened with the task of owning a house before they get the girl to marry them. The girls here don't want to rent they expect to be married & taken to a home. It's ok to have standards & be picky but I think lots of people are becoming materialistic.
- It's easy to give, when you know what it's like to have nothing. -
- Develop a backbone, not a wishbone. -
They want love, but are picky about who they want it from. Men do the same thing- I don't want just any girl to love me, I want the right girl to love me. Women are certainly more picky than men though.
A huge problem is the balancing of attraction with love. A man who is too easy to catch puts most women off, just as a woman that is too easy to f**k puts most men off when it comes to marriage material. You can't get too close too fast, unless they're young and have little relationship experience.
Women in the U.S., to me, are like a polluted waterway. That's how I view them; and since our bodies are mostly water, it's not far from the truth. Wandering eyes, materialism, alcohol & drug abuse are on the menu pretty much every time. Their latest scheme seems to be getting you in a compromising situation where they have dirt on you they can leverage. From there they clean house & not in a good way.
I think this is true...and it's a problem. Many women (not all) want to spend time in "self-discovery" while the men they end up wanting are slaving away trying to attain a future. Then, when the inexperienced, hard working man marries one of these girls, she ends up divorcing him and taking half or more of everything he's spend his life trying to obtain. This is my biggest pet peeve with marriage in the USA and other westernized countries. Marriage is supposed to be between a man and wife...and God if they are religious. Marriage has become a contract that allows the government to destroy the productive partner in the event of divorce. It encourages bad behavior on the part of the unproductive partner. Since people these days have a warped sense of what "love" really is, relationships are easily corrupted in many different ways.
Women will never admit it, but a woman's love is directly correlated to a man's social standing in some way shape or form.
Men want the looks and body proportions, while women want the status and security. Hard pill to swallow, but it's hard to undo so many eons of biological wiring.
I once had a girl i was dating come out of the blue and ask, "Do you love me Jeffrey?" I behaved like I loved her but I simply liked her a lot and told her as much. Not two minutes later, she asked if I could assist her with a money issue.
That illustrated to me that this girl wanted me to love her so she could USE me for her own purposes. I submit that women want love, not for altruistic reasons, but for reasons of self-interest and sometimes greed.
The larger point is women could care less about love, they want only what they can extract from men who are enraptured with loving them.
You two touched on a topic that I wasn't able to reply to the other day. Long story short, the only reason why so many women overwhelmingly initiate divorce, and subsequently raked their husbands over the coals, is due to the fact that these women never really loved their husbands in the first place as these women simply married out of superficial reasons such as benefiting economically and/or increasing their own social status.
Along with what TRE said, my own rendition is that in the Western world today, women start having boyfriends and start having sex as young as grade school ages, and these women go around from guy to guy and it continues on until college, or a few years post college. Any real feelings these promiscuous women have are given away and locked up with one or numerous men in the past as women experience sex differently in that they develop strong feelings for whoever they're having sex with, particularly their first series of lovers/boyfriends.
What then happens is just like the game of musical chairs where women know the music is going to stop soon so they have to hurry up and find a man to marry; and they do, they just don't disclose that the love they have for the groom is a farce as the real love they have has already been given away to the X-boyfriend who somehow got away, or broke her heart and broke up with her.
Just look at the kind of men women have one night stands with, and then look at the kind of men women marry. Most of the women I know who are married never would give the guy they married the time of day when she was wild and single.
Anyhow, it's like clockwork (read the stories on dadsdivorce.com), once a woman has her kids and gets tired of playing house with a man she never loved or respected, they pull the leaver to to claim their cash and prizes and ride off in the sunset with the x-con druggie first boyfriend they never got over.
Guys, this is why if you want to get married, you marry a virgin!