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The myth of sexual freedom in America
Perhaps my cultural consultant put it best when he explained:
http://forum.internationalliving.com/vi ... .php?t=491
â€œ***If you grew up in the West, you may have developed the idea that sexually, it is very free. In a way, it is, but in order to enjoy the "sexual liberation" of the West, you cannot just be an average Joe. In order to meet exciting and beautiful women, you have to be either super good-looking, tall, and handsome (and young, too) or be super successful. That means that a small percentage of men enjoys this kind of life and a big percentage lives lives of drudgery and hard work. in addition to all that, there is a great deal of ageism in the West- unless you have a glamorous job as a senator or a movie star, meeting younger women if you are over 40 ( in some cases, over 25) is also not an easy proposition. In other words, for an average bloke who is middle income and middle aged, life can be pretty lonely and sexually frustrating. That is , if you mind dating many women who are overweight or divorced with kids or plain unattractive.
The prostitution industry in the US is highly regulated, extremely expensive and the majority of women who are involved in it are not very attractive physically.
In spite of the Hollywood culture portraying life in America as an endless sex party, an average person there hardly has more than 10 partners in his or her lifetime.
This is in stark contrast to many societies, Thailand, for one, where many local men visit prostitutes regularly and have a choice of incredibly beautiful ones for a very affordable price. However, this is done more or less discreetly and is not mentioned in casual conversation. Expats who lived in Thailand for a long time would come up with the statement: "Americans talk about "it" but don't do it, Thais don't talk about it, but do it.
If you visit any big entertainment area in Bangkok, Manila, Phnom Penh, Rio, and even Moscow, you will find thousands upon thousands of Westerners who either live there or visit regularly all for the purpose of being able to have sex any time they want. If the West were as liberated as it is portrayed in the movies, why would there be such a powerful sex tourism movement *out* of the West?â€
Nothing could be closer to the truth. Iâ€™ve never experienced any of this â€œsexual freedomâ€ in America, only heard about it. It was all talk and no action as far as Iâ€™m concerned. On the other hand, here in the Philippines, I experience TRUE SEXUAL FREEDOM â€“ the freedom to have sex with a hot woman ANY time I want, as well as the freedom from datelessness and desperation! That is something that America never provided me, giving me only stupid excuses instead.
As expats in Thailand say, "Americans talk about it but don't do it, Thais do it but don't talk about it."
Last edited by Winston on Mon Apr 18, 2011 4:21 am, edited 1 time in total.
Yes, I'm back:)
I just had to reply to this total B.S. It's funny how Winston seems to think that he deserves all the "hot" girls, and yet what about the "not so hot" girls? His standards are high for women, but he "whines" and cries if "attractive" women have standards that exclude him.
I guess since it's a women role to be attractive, he doesn't have to be. He states that he is too good for ugly, fat girls and that they should be just ignored. Ohh, kind of like "attractive" women ignore him? Ironic, huh? A little poetic justice?
Listen up! Mating is biological. If you want to be with "hot" women, you have to be "hot" yourself and actually "work" on your appearance like they do. You think they don't work on their appearance? Sure, it would be nice if these "hot" girls would just be turned-on by your sparkling wit, intelligence, and sweetness. But, how many of you guys are "turned on" by these same traits in a women? Yeah, that's what I thought.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Sorry, but Love and Lust are two different things also.
The reason "hot foreign women" might sleep with you are many and varied:
5.)You won't be staying there long
You see gentlemen, in poorer third world countries you will be looked on as a novelty at best and a walking ATM or Visa at worst. The reason why Winston stuck out with Russian girls(non-prostitutes) is because they didn't need him enough to overlook his "ways". In the P.I, things are different. Also, Winston looking Chinese helps there because I've read that the Chinese are very prominent there. But then again, "Bar Girls" are "Bar Girls" are "Bar Girls". Sorry to make judgements, but would any of you really want to have an ADULT relationship with someone who sleeps with other men for a living? "The Knight in White Shining Armor" is just a fantasy they will use to bleed you dry.
Think about it
I see that there are still men that are misinterpreting "sexual freedom" to mean "Sex on Demand".
A little bit of a history lesson seems to be in order.
Sexual freedom, as originally conceived, was the concept that women can express themselves sexually without being condemned for it. It was lashing out at the apparent double standard that men were praised as studs and ladies men for such expression while women were regarded as tramps.
Did this mean that all men were entitled to getting sex? Not necessarily. You still have to be desirable to these women. The reality is that there are more men that want 10's then there are 10's to go around. It's a fact of life that we must accept.
If you gave up on being competitive, then you have no body to blame but yourself. What do you expect, that you can dress like a slob and women should have sex with you? Or that you can court a woman without spending a dime and she'll still have sex with you? Or do you think that you can have no ambition and women will still have sex with you?
There is no sense complaining. Half of the people you talk to won't care. The other half will think you deserved it!
So just explain all this to Diane and her family. That might settle the marriage and divorce issues once and for all. Particularly when you're scrounging for money for childbirth while having to spend it to have sex with a hot woman ANY time you want. And while Diane has already decided she wants to live in Philippines near her family, so she has someone reliable to help her with the baby. I have a suspicion the explanation above will make complete sense to them, and they just might ease up quite a bit on pressure to marry. Especially if you explain you're already looking for how to get a divorce or annulment. Just try telling them the truth.
W: Sorry Ozmodius, but you are WRONG! Here in the Philippines, I am considered HOT and good looking. I guarantee it 100 percent. IN this culture, I'm attractive. Sorry if you can't accept that. But it's the truth.
Almost all girls that like me want me to stay here. The only one that didn't was Mary, but she was a proven hustler.
So far, I've not met any girls here who have asked me to take them to America.
You are obviously not a traveler, so you believe that dumb myth that I debunked long ago.
Ozmodius, did you read these bulleted points, or do I have to repeat them again?
Many girls here don't care about my money and STILL like/love me even after they see that I'm a cheapskate and very frugal. They don't even care if I spend money on our dates, as they just like "being with me" and enjoy my funny, charismatic, positive, enthusiastic, personable personality.
This is probably the biggest reason, and my cultural consultant, a long time visitor to the Philippines who speaks two Filipino dialects, attests to it too. Most of the Filipinas Iâ€™ve met or dated here prefer that their boyfriend or husband stay with them in THEIR country. After all, family is everything to them, and so they prefer to remain close to their immediate and extended family. But if their lover insists, they will try to go overseas, albeit reluctantly. In fact, out of all the many women Iâ€™ve dated here, NOT ONE of them has asked me to take them to America or even brought up the subject! That right there DEBUNKS this common misconception. Besides, it is an American myth that most people in other countries want to come to the US. The well traveled know that is not so.
Iâ€™ve slept with bar girls and girls who normally sleep with men for money here for FREE, simply cause they liked me and found me sweet, romantic, tender and charming! They never asked me for any money! Imagine that. That could never happen to me in the States. That proves right there that they arenâ€™t after me only for money, but that I am very likable and charming to them. And Iâ€™ve gotten FREE kisses here from HUNDREDS of girls too, including French kisses from bar girls and dancers that I never paid or bought commissioned ladydrinks for (and NO, they donâ€™t do that to every guy!).
A few girls here (but not most) have told me that Iâ€™m not their type, for they like white guys or bigger masculine guys. And conversely, Iâ€™ve seen some reject white guys in favor of me, because Iâ€™m more of the type they like and go for. Now, if it were all about â€œmoney and a green cardâ€, then â€œtypeâ€ wouldnâ€™t matter now would it? But it does, because relationships and romantic chemistry are personal and subject to taste and chemistry.
Filipinas have shown favoritism toward me over other older richer guys or customers. (I can't get into details about how since it wouldn't be appropriate to describe here ) This also proves that they don't like me just for money, since I am treated better, given favoritism and preferentail treatment over other guys who have more money than me, due to my higher likeability. Some bar girls have reached down from the stage to give me a kiss on the mouth, which they don't do for most customers. I have a fun loving free-spirited personality that a lot of Filipinas resonate with, as well as a sweet romantic side, and a face they find young and handsome (gwapo). Those are the reasons why I am liked so much here that even bar girls let me hang out in their bar without paying or buying any drinks. Iâ€™m likable and entertaining to them.
I've been able to get acquainted and befriend middle class girls here who have enough money themselves not to need a guy (which I can't do in the states). Sure, the middle or upper class girls aren't easy to "pick up" in public, but they find me interesting and likable too, once they get to know me. And they are willing to spend personal time with me, unlike girls in the US who always make excuses and say they are busy.
There are some guys here with looks and money who donâ€™t do well at all with Filipinas. I know one good looking American guy here with a good income from an international job, and my cultural consultant knows a good looking young French guy here with a successful art business. Yet believe it or not, both of them canâ€™t get a girlfriend in the Philippines! They have had nothing but bad luck and bad experiences with the women here. Itâ€™s obviously not their looks or status. But rather, something in their vibe and personality just doesnâ€™t jive well with the girls here. Some peopleâ€™s chemistry just doesnâ€™t mix well with certain countries, just like mine doesnâ€™t mix well in American culture and its fake politeness social culture. Sometimes, things just donâ€™t click, not just between individuals, but between individuals and countries as well. Thus, itâ€™s not all about money and status, like some think. Yet here in the Philippines, my personality seems to jive extremely well with Filipinas as a whole, regardless of whether Iâ€™m their physical type or not. And thatâ€™s why almost all Filipinas, even those who arenâ€™t into me romantically or are already taken, ENJOY hanging out with me.
There are men I know here who have a lot of money and a high class professional occupation. Yet the girls who go out with them look unhappy around them, and donâ€™t stay with them for long. Though they will accept their money and presents, they still leave them after a while because they simply donâ€™t like them and donâ€™t enjoy being with them. Now, if it were all about money, this wouldnâ€™t happen. Iâ€™ve seen this happen to doctors, oil company professionals and business owners. As a result, these wealthy men who splurge to impress women, become jaded and cynical, unlike the happy optimistic me who even though poor, wins over women here with charm, looks, sweetness, and confidence. Youâ€™ve got to remember that these girls, though mostly poor, are HUMAN BEINGS who, like you, prefer to be with those they LIKE and CLICK with, not just anyone with money and a US passport.
From my experience with gold diggers and users in Russia and the Philippines, Iâ€™ve come to recognize their common patterns, such as the way they manipulate and tell lies, the way they tell you what you want to hear yet their actions contradict their words, and their tendency to ask for money within the first week of knowing you. And what I can tell you is that MOST of the girls who like me here do NOT exhibit these traits. However, oddly enough, there are some women (and men) who genuinely believe that giving money is a demonstration and sign of true love. These folks see no shame in â€œbuying loveâ€ and are proud to utter the phrase â€œno money, no honeyâ€. Such women will even ask for money from a man she truly loves, seeing nothing wrong with it. But of course, I do not share their values. An effective way Iâ€™ve found, to weed these types out is to simply tell them that you are poor and on a tight budget, and act like it. If they disappear after that, then you know what they were probably after. If not, then youâ€™ve got a more genuine girl. Needless to say, if you want to impress somebody, you donâ€™t have to take them to a fancy restaurant everyday; rather, mix it up with several days of going to fast food or cooking at home. A nice sweet Filipina will appreciate that.
One cannot deny that the US in its beginning had lots of Puritan sects and even some sects where all sex was prohibited and the people just died out. For a country with such a beginning, it is no wonder that people have hard time getting laid in the US.
A brain is a terrible thing to wash!
you just said that there is no such thing as "free sex"
Ozmodius, you try to think about what you have written, because this kind of writing is coming from an overly ignorant person who looks down cold. Probably you have never traveled before, or maybe you did, but you might have not tried to pick up hot girls in foreign countries. OF COURSE we men deserve hot girls, especially you, and you might have the same feeling when hot girls excludes you as well. There are not ugly girls, there are girls that have different body image and shape that attracts certain people. So, Winston likes certain kinds of girls we all like, like girls that are hot, that have tone to make themselves presentable, have confidence, and dress a certain way for attraction and showing the best side of you. What he considers unattractive is girls that don't tone themselves, that are overly obese, have no confidence and self-esteem, those kind of girls that put themselves as inferior, we don't like those kinds of girls.
BTW, many overseas women see foreign men to be interesting due to the attraction of culture a person brings that attracts people, not because of money or Visa. You might like Hispanic girls or Asian girls because of their beauty, same goes with overseas women (Maybe not Americans, since they are money driven people and not cultured people). What Winston is trying to point out is that superficially, hot American girls only go for guys that are buff, tall, have a lot of money, those kinds of guys you see on TV, and leave the average joes on the street. So to say, American women's attractiveness is more superficial than men's desires. Let me tell you something, men are more open than women are, even if there is a less attractive women trying to pick up on a hot guy, then atleast the guy won't make it seem like it's a threat like women do. Though physical attraction is also important, and some women SHOULD atleast improve themselves for dating to attract men, men portray themselves as more friendly in North America.
I watched a special on cable, I think Discovery channel, on the science of human attraction.
The show claimed that, from a biological point of view, men and women are attracted to those with evenly-portioned faces. That is, the right and left side of the face mirrors each other. The closer the match, the more appealing.
Scientists involved in the study conducted surveys in England and Japan, were photos from a variety of people (of different races) were shown. In both places, they ranked photos of those with the most evenly-portioned faces to be most attractive, while those with subtle difference between right and left (side of the face) were ranked as being less attractive.
This factor of attraction seems to cross racial and cultural lines, and IMO give an interesting perspective to cosmetic surgery. Rather than a face lift, perhaps the patient would ask the surgeon to do a computer image analysis on both sides of the face and find "imperfections" where the face is not matching.
If you're already with your partner, your wife/husband might not care as much because they've already accepted you. But if you're meeting someone for the first time, the person may decide in the first few seconds if they'd consider or reject you as a potential mate. When women are with men with evenly-matched facial features, they feel more attracted to the person and report more satisfying sexual experience and enjoyable orgasms.
I find this study fascinating. I have a very minor strabismus (squint/lazy eye) on the right and unless if I mention it, most people wouldn't notice. But I wonder if I get corrective surgery (or corrective glasses), it'd improve the initial meeting with the opposite gender, if they can spot such variations subconsciously?
Another interesting study from the show was that, when women were shown a variety of men's photos, they didn't rank the men with the most "manly" features (buff, sharp jaw, etc) to be the most appealing. They preferred men with softer, more caring facial features. The program/show speculate that women are looking to be with men who will return to them and not just mate and leave.
On th flip side, I've also read studies that showed some women preferring manly or "bad boy" men for sex, but softer, nicer men for marriage. But it's not consistent enough to claim that most women want to bear "bad boy"'s children and marry the "nice guy" to raise 'em.
Research has shown that only about 5% of men in America are sleeping with lot's of women. For example, Wilt Chamberlen said he has slept with 20,000 women. Magic Johnson said he slept with 10,000 women. Charlie Sheen has said he has slept with 2,000 women. What do all these guys have in common? They are all celebrities! So of course, they will have no problem meeting and sleeping with tons of women. Remember back to high school and college? Who were the guys sleeping with lots of girls? It was the football players, baseball players, basketball players and guys in frats. In other words, only a small percentage of guys in school were sleeping with lot's of girls. Most guys are not sleeping with lots of chicks, only a small percentage are.
Last edited by jamesbond on Sun Oct 07, 2012 3:03 am, edited 1 time in total.
Sexual freedom is a myth in the west ONLY if it is heterosexual sex. The Fem-luminati encourages women to shack up with women and men to shack up with men, but if a man so much as approaches a woman, it's soliciting and wrong. This is why, at a bar, no single woman can ever say two words to you (not sober, at least), but expect a gay guy(s) will ask you out or offer to "dance for you" because homosexuality is slowly becoming the only allowed socialization between strangers in this police state. Do you really want to live in a country that insinuates that unless a man is married to a bitch or is a flaming fαggot, then he is a dangerous criminal? America's agenda is to "hurt the man" and keep him away from "our women" (as if you were an American sex tourist in a Latin country, except you can bet that this is occurring in your own city now)!
If you stay here: Either you jack off for life, or you marry a promiscuous whore who needs your money, or you choose to be a flaming fαggot.
If you go abroad: Either you spend your entire life's savings, possibly return to the States broke, and live and die homeless or in Mommy's basement for the rest of your life.
There's no "middle way" or positive future to look forward to for single, straight men in America.
"Manginas grovel. Men travel." - me (04/17/2012)
"I used to be one of those men who believed that men are better than women at everything. Then I stood corrected!
Women are better than men at... getting fat." - me (02/24/2013)
Black women suck at life.
Or more succinctly ...
не поглеждай назад.
"Even an American judge is unlikely to award child support for imputed children." - FredOnEverything
Society does encourage Male/Male or Female/Female cohabitation otherwise known as platonic relationships.
When Male/Female become roommates, more often than not nature takes its course.
One of my acquaintances from high school shared an apartment with another girl who moved out after she married her long time boyfriend. She was desperate for another roommate because she couldn't afford it alone. My buddy who was renting a room from his ex-girlfriends parents had been looking to get out of his ex-girlfriends house for some time.
He was asked if he wanted to move in with a female, a woman he didn't know.
Well about six months after he moved in, they became sexually active.
He proposed to her about a year after moving in and she said yes. Were we shocked? Not really, the girl had been struggling for awhile dating. Its not that she was ugly or fat, she was just average looking. My buddy on the other hand came from a small town in Alabama but moved to Arizona to go to HVAC school and eventually landed a job in the city where he met his ex-gf while she was still in high school. When she left for college, she came back a changed woman, IE: there was no need to go out with White Trash from the Deep South anymore.
I took Sean under my wing and introduced him to LA's nightlife and all the different people I knew. He told me he was eternally grateful and gave him the self-confidence he had lacked.
His now wife Betty as I said was vulnerable, had recently broken up with a boyfriend, wanted to get married and have children. Sean just happen to be at the right place at the right time.
They moved back to Alabama but Betty's parents still live out here, I happen to see them as I was getting some lunch at Taco Bell about a decade ago now. I assume they are still doing okay, if I really wanted to find out, I know who to talk too.
Women are largely against prostitution as they sight violence against women as the reason not to allow it. But every study conducted in places like Germany where its regulated, taxed and legal, they have seen no increase in rapes, its actually has been trending down for years.
They don't want it because they would lose control of easily the most important part of relationships, sex.
It is legal outside of Clark County in Las Vegas however but very expensive.
Since Winton has warned about this subject matter, that's all I'll say about it.
I second what dj4m said about P4P in the U.S. It is expensive and dangerous in the States. Save it for when you're abroad. I mean, here in the Matrix, you never really know if the cops are monitoring Craig's list, and also the AWs here will charge you $500 an hour just to touch her soiled panties or something - they rarely offer actual sex since you will only be a victim of her latent misandry, on top of that you should know better than to spend ANY money on an American woman at all.
"Manginas grovel. Men travel." - me (04/17/2012)
"I used to be one of those men who believed that men are better than women at everything. Then I stood corrected!
Women are better than men at... getting fat." - me (02/24/2013)
Black women suck at life.
Freedom comes with mastery and intelligence. Therefore, sexual freedom would come to those who can get sex when they think they need it, but also have the brains to NOT have sex and let it destroy their lives, even when it is offered for free.
Westerners are too stupid to realize, that sex with ANYONE bears consequences, not just with western women. Westerners are just too stupid however. The strong, overbearing, uncontrollable desire to f**k 3rd world women is just one symptom. Why waste a hard earned fortune just for that?
I've never been in danger when doing P4P in the US. Only idiots would put themselves in danger when having sex... >_> It's all about conducting yourself right.
With that, sexual abundance has been destroyed in the US. All love and sex has been corrupted by money. Even back in the 60s, there was never any sexual freedom. Just abundance.
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