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To the man who does nothing

Discuss and talk about any general topic.

Moderators: jamesbond, fschmidt

Postby S_Parc » Tue Jun 10, 2014 8:06 pm

MarcosZeitola wrote:
Luc Furr wrote:3) lonely man find a companion; perhaps it would be better to first discover why he is lonely.


He's lonely because he does not have a companion. You're arguing in circles.


There's also the art of being alone but not lonely.

After I'd broken up with the Brazilian, that's what I started to work on, as a way of gaining self-mastery.

Eventually, Mel caught onto my ways and now, we're a couple, practicing some of these arts together. It was more or less unexpected, as I was content being alone but now, see the relationship as a journey to a new horizon but not as a treatment for loneliness.

If I were to find myself alone again in the distant future, I could become like the mad scientist in my Avatar and still have a happy and fulfilling life. But serendipity had it, that I'd be with someone and as the Taoists say, why go against the flow of the universe :wink:
16 years ago, the Best Picture of 1999, "American Beauty", telegraphed the message of Happier Abroad to the world.

Beware of long term engagements with AWs, you may find yourself in a coffin.

AB discussion thread

BTW, despite settling down with an AW, myself, the warning is still in effect.
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Postby publicduende » Tue Jun 10, 2014 10:01 pm

Marcos, this was an amazing post from you. You're very young, and yet, at least judging from your online writing persona, you know what your dreams are made of and are determined to reach them, no matter what. Little does it matter that you're short on cash and not in the Philippines right now. You'll join your family soon and have the quiet, simple yet fulfilling life you desire.

For, as you so masterfully say...if the small things in life don't fill you, the big ones won't either.

Best of luck, mate. In the space of a few posts, you have sculpted your status as the ultimate Happier Abroader in solid granite.
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Postby publicduende » Tue Jun 10, 2014 10:06 pm

S_Parc wrote:There's also the art of being alone but not lonely.

After I'd broken up with the Brazilian, that's what I started to work on, as a way of gaining self-mastery.

Eventually, Mel caught onto my ways and now, we're a couple, practicing some of these arts together. It was more or less unexpected, as I was content being alone but now, see the relationship as a journey to a new horizon but not as a treatment for loneliness.

If I were to find myself alone again in the distant future, I could become like the mad scientist in my Avatar and still have a happy and fulfilling life. But serendipity had it, that I'd be with someone and as the Taoists say, why go against the flow of the universe :wink:


There is dignity in being alone but not lonely, yet you must admit that being a monad isn't everybody's cup of tea. Sure, a self-centred loneliness predicated on observation, spiritual discipline and solitary learning is a good path to individual development. So many though may prefer going the opposite direction, plunging further into society and its contradiction, loving and suffering, falling and crying and cursing. And yet, still with some residual desire to hold another hand.

Mel is, as you put it, a co-pilot in a journey of self-discovery that you had already chosen to begin on your own. Nothing wrong with it. Some other people, including myself, just won't survive a week without crashing that wall of singleitude and reaching out for the Other, whoever and wherever they might be.
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Postby OutWest » Tue Jun 10, 2014 10:37 pm

publicduende wrote:Marcos, this was an amazing post from you. You're very young, and yet, at least judging from your online writing persona, you know what your dreams are made of and are determined to reach them, no matter what. Little does it matter that you're short on cash and not in the Philippines right now. You'll join your family soon and have the quiet, simple yet fulfilling life you desire.

For, as you so masterfully say...if the small things in life don't fill you, the big ones won't either.

Best of luck, mate. In the space of a few posts, you have sculpted your status as the ultimate Happier Abroader in solid granite.


+1. He has more basic common sense and courage than most will ever muster. I wish him well and
would be glad to show him a good turn if he is in my area.


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Postby S_Parc » Tue Jun 10, 2014 10:40 pm

publicduende wrote:There is dignity in being alone but not lonely, yet you must admit that being a monad isn't everybody's cup of tea. Sure, a self-centred loneliness predicated on observation, spiritual discipline and solitary learning is a good path to individual development. So many though may prefer going the opposite direction, plunging further into society and its contradiction, loving and suffering, falling and crying and cursing. And yet, still with some residual desire to hold another hand.

Mel is, as you put it, a co-pilot in a journey of self-discovery that you had already chosen to begin on your own. Nothing wrong with it. Some other people, including myself, just won't survive a week without crashing that wall of singleitude and reaching out for the Other, whoever and wherever they might be.


The way I look at it, let's call it the Art of Proactive Living (leaving out the terminologies/explanations of Tao, Shamanism, etc) is that it's one of the gifts that the west had received. I believe throughout the prior century, ppl like Yogananda, Suzuki, Mantak Chia, and even a handful of westerners who'd gone abroad, have brought back teachings/instructions which could be of greater benefit to ppl here than even in their originating countries.

Part of that is that western living, which combines a high degree of stress and daily isolation, is a good place to develop oneself, even w/o a monastic order like the Shaolin or the Franciscans (from your former home country). In a sense, these arts are actually being kept alive by the fact that it's needed in modern life and not relegated to some dying geezers in some remote Himalayan caves.

And at the same time, it gives one great resolve, esp when life throws its uncertainties. One guy I knew, who used to do some of this stuff (but stopped abruptly at the age of 30), got divorced and his wife had taken off with the kids. Well, he's a mess today & regrets the fact that he didn't follow my advice, years ago. Hopefully, in a few years, he'll be alright but it's hard to tell, who can recover from a serious blow, if they didn't take the time earlier, to cultivate their inner being.
16 years ago, the Best Picture of 1999, "American Beauty", telegraphed the message of Happier Abroad to the world.

Beware of long term engagements with AWs, you may find yourself in a coffin.

AB discussion thread

BTW, despite settling down with an AW, myself, the warning is still in effect.
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Postby droid » Wed Jun 11, 2014 4:03 am

S_Parc wrote:Part of that is that western living, which combines a high degree of stress and daily isolation, is a good place to develop oneself, even w/o a monastic order like the Shaolin or the Franciscans.
Way to make lemonade out of lemons LOL.
I'll take a pass on that one at this juncture, thanks :mrgreen:
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
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Postby In2dadark » Wed Jun 11, 2014 4:26 am

pete98146 wrote:That's really a wonderful post! I think one of the biggest issues with this forum is the majority of the guys on Happier Abroad are, or will be card carrying members of MGTOW. I'm one of those guys that is happily married to a foreign lady but it's not for everybody. It still takes quite a bit of money, luck, social skills and patience to find a foreign wife and not everybody here has the resources to succeed.

More and more men find it easier to function alone. I'm a 52 year old male and most of my guy friends are single. The bitterness eventually soon replaced by apathy and they don't see being alone as abnormal. In the words of Pink Floyd, they morph into becoming "Comfortably Numb."


So tragic not to have a female to validate me.. haha...
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Postby droid » Wed Jun 11, 2014 4:29 am

Cornfed wrote:
Jonny Law wrote:Everyone who is employed does have what it takes to be Happier Abroad.
The current federal minimum wage is $7.25 per hour. A full-time minimum wage employee earns $15,080 annually.
Just by saving 20% a person will have over $3,000 to travel.
NO PERSON WITH A JOB CAN TRUTHFULLY SAY THEY CANNOT MEET A FOREIGN GIRL.

OK, so you spend a year saving $3k to go on holiday for a week and meet a foreign girl. What then?


MarcosZeitola wrote:You can get by using very little. A very basic income, even slightly below average, would allow you to get decent housing and set up some form of business abroad from which you could then live. This can be achieved in a few years work.


If a guy's prospects in America are $7.25 per hour and fapping, there's no point in staying. They're better off going for $3 abroad and at least getting laid/having companionship.
In that situation I'd rather pay $200 for some apt in Cebu, than $800+ in the states.

I've posted this before, sorry to be redundant:
http://www.numbeo.com/cost-of-living/compare_cities.jsp?country1=United+States&country2=Philippines&city1=Miami%2C+FL&city2=Manila
It's an extreme comparison, but kind of illustrates the point.
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
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Postby Cornfed » Wed Jun 11, 2014 4:37 am

droid wrote:If a guy's prospects in America are $7.25 per hour and fapping, there's no point in staying. They're better of going for $3 abroad and at least getting laid/having companionship.

Of course, but he would need the ability to earn an income in his chosen country. When you consider the need to purchase insurance, internationally traded goods like electronics, medical care etc. expenses could easily run to $1k per month no matter where you are, especially if you had dependants, and that is not always doable. We have of course been over this in other threads.
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Postby Jonny Law » Wed Jun 11, 2014 4:45 am

Cornfed wrote:
Jonny Law wrote:Everyone who is employed does have what it takes to be Happier Abroad.
The current federal minimum wage is $7.25 per hour. A full-time minimum wage employee earns $15,080 annually.
Just by saving 20% a person will have over $3,000 to travel.
NO PERSON WITH A JOB CAN TRUTHFULLY SAY THEY CANNOT MEET A FOREIGN GIRL.

OK, so you spend a year saving $3k to go on holiday for a week and meet a foreign girl. What then?


Personally I spend more than $3,000 a year.

Then what? I bring alone them to my hotel room or in some cases we go her to her bedroom. Then I take her cloths off.

In fact there is a whole website called Happier Abroad filled with people who go to foreign countries and enjoy foreign women.
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Postby Cornfed » Wed Jun 11, 2014 4:57 am

Jonny Law wrote:
Cornfed wrote:
Jonny Law wrote:Everyone who is employed does have what it takes to be Happier Abroad.
The current federal minimum wage is $7.25 per hour. A full-time minimum wage employee earns $15,080 annually.
Just by saving 20% a person will have over $3,000 to travel.
NO PERSON WITH A JOB CAN TRUTHFULLY SAY THEY CANNOT MEET A FOREIGN GIRL.

OK, so you spend a year saving $3k to go on holiday for a week and meet a foreign girl. What then?


Personally I spend more than $3,000 a year.

Then what? I bring alone them to my hotel room or in some cases we go her to her bedroom. Then I take her cloths off.

In fact there is a whole website called Happier Abroad filled with people who go to foreign countries and enjoy foreign women.

What I'm saying is, if it takes a whole year just to save enough to spend a week or so in a foreign country and f**k some foreign hoe, what is the point? You can't live in the country on that kind of money for any length of time, so you can't responsibly get married. You can't take a foreign bride home if you are poor. What is achieved by saving every penny of your meager wage for such a purpose?
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Postby In2dadark » Wed Jun 11, 2014 5:00 am

Judging by the HA facebook page Winston didn't have much luck in a recent encounter w/ a U.S. hooker...

I rather enjoy my own space & sleeping in my bed alone, doing what I want, when I want.
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Postby Jonny Law » Wed Jun 11, 2014 5:49 am

Cornfed wrote:
Jonny Law wrote:
Cornfed wrote:
Jonny Law wrote:Everyone who is employed does have what it takes to be Happier Abroad.
The current federal minimum wage is $7.25 per hour. A full-time minimum wage employee earns $15,080 annually.
Just by saving 20% a person will have over $3,000 to travel.
NO PERSON WITH A JOB CAN TRUTHFULLY SAY THEY CANNOT MEET A FOREIGN GIRL.

OK, so you spend a year saving $3k to go on holiday for a week and meet a foreign girl. What then?


Personally I spend more than $3,000 a year.

Then what? I bring alone them to my hotel room or in some cases we go her to her bedroom. Then I take her cloths off.

In fact there is a whole website called Happier Abroad filled with people who go to foreign countries and enjoy foreign women.

What I'm saying is, if it takes a whole year just to save enough to spend a week or so in a foreign country and f**k some foreign hoe, what is the point? You can't live in the country on that kind of money for any length of time, so you can't responsibly get married. You can't take a foreign bride home if you are poor. What is achieved by saving every penny of your meager wage for such a purpose?


If you are too stupid or unwilling to meet a foreign bride then you also will not be able to meet an American women either.

The average cost for an American wedding is $27,021

http://www.reuters.com/article/2012/03/ ... 1O20120323

I personally make many times minimum wage and I enjoy life and do travel. My point is "NO PERSON WITH A JOB CAN TRUTHFULLY SAY THEY CANNOT MEET A FOREIGN GIRL"

All the energy you spend making stupid excuses could have been spent enjoying women abroad (my suggestion Russia, or Ukraine)

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2013/04/ ... 40x463.jpg
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Postby Cornfed » Wed Jun 11, 2014 5:53 am

Jonny Law wrote:If you are too stupid or unwilling to meet a foreign bride then you also will not be able to meet an American women either.

Of course it is easy to meet a foreign potential bride, but what would be the point if you are too poor to actually marry her.
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Postby OutWest » Wed Jun 11, 2014 5:56 am

In2dadark wrote:
pete98146 wrote:That's really a wonderful post! I think one of the biggest issues with this forum is the majority of the guys on Happier Abroad are, or will be card carrying members of MGTOW. I'm one of those guys that is happily married to a foreign lady but it's not for everybody. It still takes quite a bit of money, luck, social skills and patience to find a foreign wife and not everybody here has the resources to succeed.

More and more men find it easier to function alone. I'm a 52 year old male and most of my guy friends are single. The bitterness eventually soon replaced by apathy and they don't see being alone as abnormal. In the words of Pink Floyd, they morph into becoming "Comfortably Numb."


So tragic not to have a female to validate me.. haha...


As Pete points out, it's not for everybody. Very few of the bitter or comfortably numb men I know in the USA are comfortably so. Most are bitter or resigned. Validate me, or whatever...sounds like Pop-psych whatever. Few of us who are happily married will be anything but amused by those who dismiss love and care as validation...sounds more like sour grapes. At any rate, when one finds a very nice girl, if you validate often, you can have a baby on the way like my wife does now...LOL...yes, she can be quite aggressive and insisted on very frequent validation!
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