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All females on foreign dating sites are damaged goods

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newlifeinphilippines
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Re: All females on foreign dating sites are damaged goods

Post by newlifeinphilippines » February 3rd, 2015, 7:44 pm

MarcosZeitola wrote:I would never advocate finding a wife on a dating sate, myself. A good friend of mine has found a lovely lady through an otherwise notoriously bad dating site, and he seems to be genuinely happy with his choice of woman. Why would I rain on his parade?

That being said, I am well aware of the dangers of online dating, and far too many men are naive about it. I met my own wife online as well, but when I met her I was not looking for a partner and neither was she. We simply chatted on a chat site, an anonymous one, and had such a connection that we shared contact details and began Skyping. We stayed in touch for over a year, as she and I both focused on our studies and work. By the time we met up, we were already deeply in love and got engaged shortly after.

Had I not come along, she says she would have probably married a Filipino. Her sister says she does not want to date a foreigner because "she is lazy to speak English" and "they are all old and ugly anyway". So she just focuses on her engineering study. This is the type of girl that you want: the type who does not "hunt" for any foreigner, who is not as infatuated with everything American or Western and who does not have marriage to a foreign guy high on her list of priorities, if at all. Her love interests and crushes will have been Filipino men, and you will be an exotic treat to her, rather then the latest cashcow. You will continue to be as interesting and fresh to her as she is to you, and with her you can find a lasting happiness knowing that you're number one, not number fifteen on her list.
i agree that is the woman you want but man it aint easy finding a girl like that unless you practically live there and even then it still be work like trying to find the right girl for you and go through the process. Just cause a girl is sweet and all doesn't mean she is the right one for you for me my standards are high on many things so it wouldn't be easy. And no way would i advocate someone pack their backs and live there for many months in one single location just to find a wife. Moreso like take yearly vacations and sightseeing and hope you find a wife along the way especially if you do solid activities along the way to get you exposure (and im not talking about bars or hotels).




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MarcosZeitola
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Re: All females on foreign dating sites are damaged goods

Post by MarcosZeitola » February 3rd, 2015, 8:00 pm

newlifeinphilippines wrote:i agree that is the woman you want but man it aint easy finding a girl like that unless you practically live there and even then it still be work like trying to find the right girl for you and go through the process. Just cause a girl is sweet and all doesn't mean she is the right one for you for me my standards are high on many things so it wouldn't be easy. And no way would i advocate someone pack their backs and live there for many months in one single location just to find a wife. Moreso like take yearly vacations and sightseeing and hope you find a wife along the way especially if you do solid activities along the way to get you exposure (and im not talking about bars or hotels).
I said it before and I will say it again: your biggest issue is your high standards. If you meet a girl who really is amazing in many ways but in other ways she "doesn't make the cut" for you, you have to ask yourself: who am I to dismiss this girl as a partner? You have your own flaws too. Your own sins, your own vices. And you, by your own admission, aren't physically attractive either. Why then do you keep putting so much emphasis on a girls looks? Why are your standards so high?

I think you would be a lot happier if you found a girl, a girl you find at least mildly physically attractive at first, and talk to her. Someone who is actually good enough at English to have a good conversation. Someone who can make you laugh. Someone who cooks well. Someone who isn't a whore or a golddigger with a giant list of exes. You talk to her, like a normal human being, and see where things go. Don't make it into some sort of beauty contest with being your wife as the "grand prize". Because you're not that much of a catch. You're just a flawed guy, why expect perfection from a girl?

You make so much of your newfound Christian faith. Fine! So follow in the example of Christ and be humble.

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Re: All females on foreign dating sites are damaged goods

Post by newlifeinphilippines » February 3rd, 2015, 8:13 pm

MarcosZeitola wrote:
newlifeinphilippines wrote:i agree that is the woman you want but man it aint easy finding a girl like that unless you practically live there and even then it still be work like trying to find the right girl for you and go through the process. Just cause a girl is sweet and all doesn't mean she is the right one for you for me my standards are high on many things so it wouldn't be easy. And no way would i advocate someone pack their backs and live there for many months in one single location just to find a wife. Moreso like take yearly vacations and sightseeing and hope you find a wife along the way especially if you do solid activities along the way to get you exposure (and im not talking about bars or hotels).
I said it before and I will say it again: your biggest issue is your high standards. If you meet a girl who really is amazing in many ways but in other ways she "doesn't make the cut" for you, you have to ask yourself: who am I to dismiss this girl as a partner? You have your own flaws too. Your own sins, your own vices. And you, by your own admission, aren't physically attractive either. Why then do you keep putting so much emphasis on a girls looks? Why are your standards so high?

I think you would be a lot happier if you found a girl, a girl you find at least mildly physically attractive at first, and talk to her. Someone who is actually good enough at English to have a good conversation. Someone who can make you laugh. Someone who cooks well. Someone who isn't a whore or a golddigger with a giant list of exes. You talk to her, like a normal human being, and see where things go. Don't make it into some sort of beauty contest with being your wife as the "grand prize". Because you're not that much of a catch. You're just a flawed guy, why expect perfection from a girl?

You make so much of your newfound Christian faith. Fine! So follow in the example of Christ and be humble.
The girlfriend i had in 2014 was decently attractive but she was a bit of a leech and i just was bored to tears with her and never could converse and the sex never was enjoyable cause i always had to ask for it and it was hard for her to enjoy it as much as i had hope and her attitude on other things wasn't that great and she was a bit annoying and kind of shallow and nor was s he really into being a passionate sweet lover. it was like a puppy dog too you feel sorry for. I dont want to get into a relationship with girls like that so that is one reason im picky. I want to be in a relatinoship with a girl i actually desire not cause im lonely and have no one else.

actually one of my biggest is probably i hate socializing and lack confidence. and im a horndog. For example that one girlf rom teh baptist church turned me off cause she was a virgin and seemed so boring. I dont want to hang out with a girl as a friend. i dont know i couldn't imagine marrying a girl like that i was bored to tears after just hanging out for 5 minutes LOL. I think going to church, etc though is slowly helping to learn how to socialize though.

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MarcosZeitola
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Re: All females on foreign dating sites are damaged goods

Post by MarcosZeitola » February 3rd, 2015, 8:20 pm

newlifeinphilippines wrote:actually one of my biggest is probably i hate socializing and lack confidence. and im a horndog. For example that one girlf rom teh baptist church turned me off cause she was a virgin and seemed so boring. I dont want to hang out with a girl as a friend. i dont know i couldn't imagine marrying a girl like that i was bored to tears after just hanging out for 5 minutes LOL. I think going to church, etc though is slowly helping to learn how to socialize though.
Plenty of issues for you to work on, then. As for a girl being boring: that's exactly what I advice you to avoid. You can't f**k every hour of every day, there will be moments where you just sit together with your wife and you'll have to find other activities to engage in. If you can't even hold a proper dinner table conversation, how can you ever expect to marry and entertain a wife for life? You talk about relationship quite often, but make up your mind: it's either meaningless sex with hoes or a lasting, meaningful relationship. If you go for the former, stay the same and continue to piss your life away. If you want the latter, you have to be able to be her best friend and confident as well as her lover.

And this talk about "not being ready yet", Jesus Christ man. You're in your thirties, so you're ready. Try to engage in more church activities and talk to more people, improve your social skills. All that is key if you ever want to have a wife instead of a fuckbuddy.

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Re: All females on foreign dating sites are damaged goods

Post by hammanta » February 3rd, 2015, 8:26 pm

newlifeinphilippines wrote:
MarcosZeitola wrote:I would never advocate finding a wife on a dating sate, myself. A good friend of mine has found a lovely lady through an otherwise notoriously bad dating site, and he seems to be genuinely happy with his choice of woman. Why would I rain on his parade?

That being said, I am well aware of the dangers of online dating, and far too many men are naive about it. I met my own wife online as well, but when I met her I was not looking for a partner and neither was she. We simply chatted on a chat site, an anonymous one, and had such a connection that we shared contact details and began Skyping. We stayed in touch for over a year, as she and I both focused on our studies and work. By the time we met up, we were already deeply in love and got engaged shortly after.

Had I not come along, she says she would have probably married a Filipino. Her sister says she does not want to date a foreigner because "she is lazy to speak English" and "they are all old and ugly anyway". So she just focuses on her engineering study. This is the type of girl that you want: the type who does not "hunt" for any foreigner, who is not as infatuated with everything American or Western and who does not have marriage to a foreign guy high on her list of priorities, if at all. Her love interests and crushes will have been Filipino men, and you will be an exotic treat to her, rather then the latest cashcow. You will continue to be as interesting and fresh to her as she is to you, and with her you can find a lasting happiness knowing that you're number one, not number fifteen on her list.
i agree that is the woman you want but man it aint easy finding a girl like that unless you practically live there and even then it still be work like trying to find the right girl for you and go through the process. Just cause a girl is sweet and all doesn't mean she is the right one for you for me my standards are high on many things so it wouldn't be easy. And no way would i advocate someone pack their backs and live there for many months in one single location just to find a wife. Moreso like take yearly vacations and sightseeing and hope you find a wife along the way especially if you do solid activities along the way to get you exposure (and im not talking about bars or hotels).
I don't get it. Then what is your suggestion NewLife? What is the means that can get you to the end? You shoot down everyone's suggestions and advice as something that would not work for you because of blah blah blah. I'm not saying everything can or will work but do you even try? How can you find that Christian nympho virgin you so seek?

You gotta find your own way. Not everything works for everyone but you gotta put yourself out there. I met a guy a couple weeks ago, probably early 30's married to an attractive Japanese girl. They have a kid and she seems nice. I was kind of jealous of him. He met her while stationed in Japan with the military. His situation is different than mine but he was at the right place and time. Finding a great girl happens at different moments and different situations, you just have to put yourself in them. I met a cute chinese girl at an orientation last weekend for a youth volunteer program I am doing. We hit it off well and she wants to come with me on a hiking trip I'm planning for the students. Who knows I could end up dating her later on or maybe not but at least the possibility is there. I wouldn't have the chance if I was home all day or not involved with anything. One can wallow in their sorrow til they drown themselves with tears, filled with dreams and aspirations that never come true. Or they can get out there and stop making excuses. You may never find that virgin Christian nympho but at least you can say you tried. And then you never know what may come of it.

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Re: All females on foreign dating sites are damaged goods

Post by newlifeinphilippines » February 3rd, 2015, 8:29 pm

There seems to be an issue though. The girls i lust after and am extremely into are the ones who aren't the kind you would marry cause they lack conversation and sincerity on many levels (religion, spirituality, intellect). or they aren't intersted in ME in the first place. The ones who bore me to death might be into me but im not into them. LOL. I dont know ive never seen a girl that fires my intellectual or emotions. I usually can't stand to be around any woman unless there is sex involved. I just can't stand most of them. It feels like cock teasing or something.

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Re: All females on foreign dating sites are damaged goods

Post by newlifeinphilippines » February 3rd, 2015, 8:34 pm

hammanta wrote:
newlifeinphilippines wrote:
MarcosZeitola wrote:I would never advocate finding a wife on a dating sate, myself. A good friend of mine has found a lovely lady through an otherwise notoriously bad dating site, and he seems to be genuinely happy with his choice of woman. Why would I rain on his parade?

That being said, I am well aware of the dangers of online dating, and far too many men are naive about it. I met my own wife online as well, but when I met her I was not looking for a partner and neither was she. We simply chatted on a chat site, an anonymous one, and had such a connection that we shared contact details and began Skyping. We stayed in touch for over a year, as she and I both focused on our studies and work. By the time we met up, we were already deeply in love and got engaged shortly after.

Had I not come along, she says she would have probably married a Filipino. Her sister says she does not want to date a foreigner because "she is lazy to speak English" and "they are all old and ugly anyway". So she just focuses on her engineering study. This is the type of girl that you want: the type who does not "hunt" for any foreigner, who is not as infatuated with everything American or Western and who does not have marriage to a foreign guy high on her list of priorities, if at all. Her love interests and crushes will have been Filipino men, and you will be an exotic treat to her, rather then the latest cashcow. You will continue to be as interesting and fresh to her as she is to you, and with her you can find a lasting happiness knowing that you're number one, not number fifteen on her list.
i agree that is the woman you want but man it aint easy finding a girl like that unless you practically live there and even then it still be work like trying to find the right girl for you and go through the process. Just cause a girl is sweet and all doesn't mean she is the right one for you for me my standards are high on many things so it wouldn't be easy. And no way would i advocate someone pack their backs and live there for many months in one single location just to find a wife. Moreso like take yearly vacations and sightseeing and hope you find a wife along the way especially if you do solid activities along the way to get you exposure (and im not talking about bars or hotels).
I don't get it. Then what is your suggestion NewLife? What is the means that can get you to the end? You shoot down everyone's suggestions and advice as something that would not work for you because of blah blah blah. I'm not saying everything can or will work but do you even try? How can you find that Christian nympho virgin you so seek?

You gotta find your own way. Not everything works for everyone but you gotta put yourself out there. I met a guy a couple weeks ago, probably early 30's married to an attractive Japanese girl. They have a kid and she seems nice. I was kind of jealous of him. He met her while stationed in Japan with the military. His situation is different than mine but he was at the right place and time. Finding a great girl happens at different moments and different situations, you just have to put yourself in them. I met a cute chinese girl at an orientation last weekend for a youth volunteer program I am doing. We hit it off well and she wants to come with me on a hiking trip I'm planning for the students. Who knows I could end up dating her later on or maybe not but at least the possibility is there. I wouldn't have the chance if I was home all day or not involved with anything. One can wallow in their sorrow til they drown themselves with tears, filled with dreams and aspirations that never come true. Or they can get out there and stop making excuses. You may never find that virgin Christian nympho but at least you can say you tried. And then you never know what may come of it.

I was just saying there that it aint easy finding a wife abroad it takes a lot of time and effort and money and still can lead to failure. Its not realistic for many guys to go to a foreign country for months and go wife hunting. and even if they do find this elusive wife they would have to keep going back to make sure she is legit.

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Re: All females on foreign dating sites are damaged goods

Post by hammanta » February 3rd, 2015, 8:53 pm

newlifeinphilippines wrote:
hammanta wrote:
newlifeinphilippines wrote:
MarcosZeitola wrote:I would never advocate finding a wife on a dating sate, myself. A good friend of mine has found a lovely lady through an otherwise notoriously bad dating site, and he seems to be genuinely happy with his choice of woman. Why would I rain on his parade?

That being said, I am well aware of the dangers of online dating, and far too many men are naive about it. I met my own wife online as well, but when I met her I was not looking for a partner and neither was she. We simply chatted on a chat site, an anonymous one, and had such a connection that we shared contact details and began Skyping. We stayed in touch for over a year, as she and I both focused on our studies and work. By the time we met up, we were already deeply in love and got engaged shortly after.

Had I not come along, she says she would have probably married a Filipino. Her sister says she does not want to date a foreigner because "she is lazy to speak English" and "they are all old and ugly anyway". So she just focuses on her engineering study. This is the type of girl that you want: the type who does not "hunt" for any foreigner, who is not as infatuated with everything American or Western and who does not have marriage to a foreign guy high on her list of priorities, if at all. Her love interests and crushes will have been Filipino men, and you will be an exotic treat to her, rather then the latest cashcow. You will continue to be as interesting and fresh to her as she is to you, and with her you can find a lasting happiness knowing that you're number one, not number fifteen on her list.
i agree that is the woman you want but man it aint easy finding a girl like that unless you practically live there and even then it still be work like trying to find the right girl for you and go through the process. Just cause a girl is sweet and all doesn't mean she is the right one for you for me my standards are high on many things so it wouldn't be easy. And no way would i advocate someone pack their backs and live there for many months in one single location just to find a wife. Moreso like take yearly vacations and sightseeing and hope you find a wife along the way especially if you do solid activities along the way to get you exposure (and im not talking about bars or hotels).
I don't get it. Then what is your suggestion NewLife? What is the means that can get you to the end? You shoot down everyone's suggestions and advice as something that would not work for you because of blah blah blah. I'm not saying everything can or will work but do you even try? How can you find that Christian nympho virgin you so seek?

You gotta find your own way. Not everything works for everyone but you gotta put yourself out there. I met a guy a couple weeks ago, probably early 30's married to an attractive Japanese girl. They have a kid and she seems nice. I was kind of jealous of him. He met her while stationed in Japan with the military. His situation is different than mine but he was at the right place and time. Finding a great girl happens at different moments and different situations, you just have to put yourself in them. I met a cute chinese girl at an orientation last weekend for a youth volunteer program I am doing. We hit it off well and she wants to come with me on a hiking trip I'm planning for the students. Who knows I could end up dating her later on or maybe not but at least the possibility is there. I wouldn't have the chance if I was home all day or not involved with anything. One can wallow in their sorrow til they drown themselves with tears, filled with dreams and aspirations that never come true. Or they can get out there and stop making excuses. You may never find that virgin Christian nympho but at least you can say you tried. And then you never know what may come of it.

I was just saying there that it aint easy finding a wife abroad it takes a lot of time and effort and money and still can lead to failure. Its not realistic for many guys to go to a foreign country for months and go wife hunting. and even if they do find this elusive wife they would have to keep going back to make sure she is legit.
And that's my point. What do you suggest? Give up? Stay in America? Don't do anything? Take a risk? Either way the end outcome for most will be failure if they don't branch out.

Out of most here, you have one of the best opportunities to live abroad. 6 months is a hell of a lot more time than most guys are allowed to have off or could afford. While you are there, make the most out of your time. But as Marcos has pointed out, you seem to be at a crossroads between what your body wants and what your mind/religion wants. That is something only you can come to grips with.

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Re: All females on foreign dating sites are damaged goods

Post by newlifeinphilippines » February 3rd, 2015, 9:05 pm

hammanta wrote:
newlifeinphilippines wrote:
hammanta wrote:
newlifeinphilippines wrote:
MarcosZeitola wrote:I would never advocate finding a wife on a dating sate, myself. A good friend of mine has found a lovely lady through an otherwise notoriously bad dating site, and he seems to be genuinely happy with his choice of woman. Why would I rain on his parade?

That being said, I am well aware of the dangers of online dating, and far too many men are naive about it. I met my own wife online as well, but when I met her I was not looking for a partner and neither was she. We simply chatted on a chat site, an anonymous one, and had such a connection that we shared contact details and began Skyping. We stayed in touch for over a year, as she and I both focused on our studies and work. By the time we met up, we were already deeply in love and got engaged shortly after.

Had I not come along, she says she would have probably married a Filipino. Her sister says she does not want to date a foreigner because "she is lazy to speak English" and "they are all old and ugly anyway". So she just focuses on her engineering study. This is the type of girl that you want: the type who does not "hunt" for any foreigner, who is not as infatuated with everything American or Western and who does not have marriage to a foreign guy high on her list of priorities, if at all. Her love interests and crushes will have been Filipino men, and you will be an exotic treat to her, rather then the latest cashcow. You will continue to be as interesting and fresh to her as she is to you, and with her you can find a lasting happiness knowing that you're number one, not number fifteen on her list.
i agree that is the woman you want but man it aint easy finding a girl like that unless you practically live there and even then it still be work like trying to find the right girl for you and go through the process. Just cause a girl is sweet and all doesn't mean she is the right one for you for me my standards are high on many things so it wouldn't be easy. And no way would i advocate someone pack their backs and live there for many months in one single location just to find a wife. Moreso like take yearly vacations and sightseeing and hope you find a wife along the way especially if you do solid activities along the way to get you exposure (and im not talking about bars or hotels).
I don't get it. Then what is your suggestion NewLife? What is the means that can get you to the end? You shoot down everyone's suggestions and advice as something that would not work for you because of blah blah blah. I'm not saying everything can or will work but do you even try? How can you find that Christian nympho virgin you so seek?

You gotta find your own way. Not everything works for everyone but you gotta put yourself out there. I met a guy a couple weeks ago, probably early 30's married to an attractive Japanese girl. They have a kid and she seems nice. I was kind of jealous of him. He met her while stationed in Japan with the military. His situation is different than mine but he was at the right place and time. Finding a great girl happens at different moments and different situations, you just have to put yourself in them. I met a cute chinese girl at an orientation last weekend for a youth volunteer program I am doing. We hit it off well and she wants to come with me on a hiking trip I'm planning for the students. Who knows I could end up dating her later on or maybe not but at least the possibility is there. I wouldn't have the chance if I was home all day or not involved with anything. One can wallow in their sorrow til they drown themselves with tears, filled with dreams and aspirations that never come true. Or they can get out there and stop making excuses. You may never find that virgin Christian nympho but at least you can say you tried. And then you never know what may come of it.

I was just saying there that it aint easy finding a wife abroad it takes a lot of time and effort and money and still can lead to failure. Its not realistic for many guys to go to a foreign country for months and go wife hunting. and even if they do find this elusive wife they would have to keep going back to make sure she is legit.
And that's my point. What do you suggest? Give up? Stay in America? Don't do anything? Take a risk? Either way the end outcome for most will be failure if they don't branch out.

Out of most here, you have one of the best opportunities to live abroad. 6 months is a hell of a lot more time than most guys are allowed to have off or could afford. While you are there, make the most out of your time. But as Marcos has pointed out, you seem to be at a crossroads between what your body wants and what your mind/religion wants. That is something only you can come to grips with.

well i can't afford such endeavours anymore more. Im taking a break. Also if i travel again i can't sit in my hotel or apartment for a few months in one location i can't be a sexpat anymore lol its pointless and immoral. But it almost requires sitting in one place for awhile to find a wife but usually what happens is you wind up with sluts instead and its all downhill then. Thats why i was thinking like you advocated to travel for other reasons. Also keep moving around to different locations so you dont stay stagnant. if you find a wife along the way so be it if not well it wasn't atotal failure. Thats why i was thinking of india in the future cause you can do other things there (at least i can).

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Re: All females on foreign dating sites are damaged goods

Post by pete98146 » February 3rd, 2015, 10:21 pm

Come on now! All of them? Don't tell me I got the only good one in the entire country!!

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Re: All females on foreign dating sites are damaged goods

Post by MrMan » February 3rd, 2015, 11:32 pm

Banano wrote:It might sound unpopular and crazy thing to say on site that promotes happier abroad life but im talkin from expirience.
I talked to about 50+ women for at least a day or 2, all of them are 5-7 on a scale, 18-30 yo and im very disapointed with results and thts not because of lack of interest but bc ALL of them are damaged goods.

Every single of them admited 'dating' westerner, at least one or 2, but im not silly these women will always claim low number coz who wants to come across as easy rite?

Most insulting are the ones who say that they are tired of casual meaningless sex and now they want serious relationship.. yep. After all these random white cocks she is looking for mr sucker whoz will not judge her.

If you thought american women are promiscous then think again.

Look i dont mind doing sluts but what pisses me off is when slut wants u to treat her as if she never saw cock in her entire life. Some of them will say they like westerners coz let women be free
In some countries, virginity until marriage is considered the norm. Maybe your dating site attracts women who don't act that way. But that doesn't mean that all women on the site are that way or that all women on all dating sites are that way.

If you are looking for a virgin, you could not let on that it is important to you and try to illicit comments on her feelings on meaningless sex, and if she hasn't ever done that, she might mention the fact. But women can lie, too, and you don't know the character of a person based on their picture on a site.

If a woman has dated a westerner, that doesn't mean she's slept with one of them. It might make it a bit less likely she's a virgin than if she dated a local man or if she'd never dated at all.

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Re: All females on foreign dating sites are damaged goods

Post by OutWest » February 4th, 2015, 12:02 am

pete98146 wrote:Come on now! All of them? Don't tell me I got the only good one in the entire country!!
Yes...you girl hog!

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Re: All females on foreign dating sites are damaged goods

Post by Mr Natural » February 4th, 2015, 1:23 am

MarcosZeitola wrote:I would never advocate finding a wife on a dating sate, myself ......... I met my own wife online as well
:roll:
MarcosZeitola wrote:This is the type of girl that you want: the type who does not "hunt" for any foreigner, who is not as infatuated with everything American or Western and who does not have marriage to a foreign guy high on her list of priorities, if at all. Her love interests and crushes will have been Filipino men, and you will be an exotic treat to her, rather then the latest cashcow. You will continue to be as interesting and fresh to her as she is to you, and with her you can find a lasting happiness knowing that you're number one, not number fifteen on her list.
But this is excellent advice.
hammanta wrote:I don't get it. Then what is your suggestion NewLife? What is the means that can get you to the end? You shoot down everyone's suggestions and advice as something that would not work for you because of blah blah blah.
He doesn't have any suggestions. He reminds me of the old story about a guy who searched the world over for the perfect woman. But when he finally found her, turned out she was looking for the perfect man.
Everybody has a plan til they get punched in the mouth
Mike Tyson

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