A Man that's a 28 Year Old Virgin

[xiongmao]

I waited ages before being with a woman. But after all that waiting for me P4P just isn't that great. It was good in China because it was a bit illicit and the nosy interfering hotel staff made it more exciting. But on the whole I attach much more value to the whole GFE thing and for that Asian women are hard to beat.

I do like the thrill of the chase. Like at the moment I am trying to find a job. I find that much more exciting than actually getting the job then having to go into the same office every f*cking day.

Why did I wait so long to discover women? I would say it has a lot to do with how slow my personality has developed - read Carl Jung if you're interested in this. Intuitive types like myself are particularly slow to develop their full range of cognitive functions, but when they finally do they are formidable.

[Tsar]

I waited ages before being with a woman. But after all that waiting for me P4P just isn't that great. It was good in China because it was a bit illicit and the nosy interfering hotel staff made it more exciting. But on the whole I attach much more value to the whole GFE thing and for that Asian women are hard to beat.

I do like the thrill of the chase. Like at the moment I am trying to find a job. I find that much more exciting than actually getting the job then having to go into the same office every f*cking day.

Why did I wait so long to discover women? I would say it has a lot to do with how slow my personality has developed - read Carl Jung if you're interested in this. Intuitive types like myself are particularly slow to develop their full range of cognitive functions, but when they finally do they are formidable.

I am an intuitive type. I am an INTJ.

[droid]

My motivation would be just to get the experience over with and with a hot girl or two, and then be done with it and know what it's like. I can control my feelings of lust and such. So it would purely be just to have the experience just to have it. Then just be done with relationships and females for awhile afterwards.

Yeahhh.. right

I've always been last at everything or almost everything. I would be superior to most modern guys if I were to be with a hot virgin.

What do you care about others? I know it's part of it, i also seek some external validation, but are you going to start advertising it or something if it happens? Again, I differ in that my main motivation was lust.

But if I do go to Greece I would probably do the p4p but do it with two girls at once so I'd feel better about that being my first time (considering it's p4p).

Good luck having the stamina for that.

Actually, there's no proper noun *posterer*, since your alternative, poster, is not a person by a posted sign, as thus, the former is a makeshift idiomatic colloquial expression for the 'Net than an entry in Webster-Merriam.

You guys are hillarious!

I didn't want to go down this path of inquiry but you didn't grow up in a household like mine. My dad would have tossed you onto the streets, years ago. He would have dubbed you as a lazy pseudo-intellectual. For me, the pressure was *on*, all of the time. There were no dillydally ways like studying liberal arts for four years and hoping for the best. It was all practical ... one was an engineer, accountant, pre-med/pre-nursing, labor/construction, police academy, or whatever.
I suspect that in place of the above practical ways of the world, you were allowed to dream around and believe that you were some undiscovered romantic writer of the 1800s. Well, you see the results of that today.

Makes sense.

@Tsar:
It's been over a month since the last discussion we've all had here on your situation. Did you look for some of the jobs I've suggested?

[Tsar]

@Tsar:
It's been over a month since the last discussion we've all had here on your situation. Did you look for some of the jobs I've suggested?

I have been working on getting self-employed odd jobs. Jester gave me an idea for something I'm trying to work on and I will post more about it if I get it lined up. I've been visiting places and explaining it, asking if I could pass out flyers for the service. I'm also thinking about buying something wholesale and trying to sell it, either on eBay or in-person, which Starchild thought was a good idea. So I should have something lined up to earn money even if it's not a job with a private business (or corporation).

[drronnie]

i dont think this is a problem ,if he is happy with that

The problem is that losing your virginity changes you, and that when you are a virgin emotional pain hits harder because everything surrounding sex and relationships is mystical. Once you get the monkey off your back and demystify p***y, it clears your mind of certain baggage. You'll never be quite as un-confident as you were when you were a virgin. I wish we had a culture that said that a young man needs to lose it by age 16. Have legal p4p and go get it done with a talented professional who can teach all the positions, but do most of the work for you and also make it a good memory. I think if guys like Tsar had had something like that done for them, they wouldn't end up so dysfunctional. In Tsar's case, he'll probably never break out of this spell because to do so would break his fantasies and he would have to confront sex and marriage and life as it is rather than what he fancies it is.

Ghost, you should save the above response, I couldn't have said it any better.

If anything, the deification of love/sex/relationships and then, not experiencing them during those formative years, is probably what's been creating these mass shooters, ala Holmes, Rodgers, etc.

Once the dream is broken, then reality can set in and a person can grow up. In particular, I'd put the finger on parents, for not knowing this stuff and touting society's BS. I'd already informed a few parents about taking a vacation to Thailand, while their son is in the 17/18 transit period before college. The idea being that the kid could take an escapade to a Soapy massage place while the mother and sisters are out shopping

I believe that you're correct about Tsar, which is why I'd given up trying to change his perspective or even M.O. He's too old and the stage he's stuck at is the mental age of 13/14, where the line between fantasy and reality is completely blurred. Typically, that's the age where one breaks from the dream land of Star Trek/Star Wars/Lord of the Rings/King Arthur to that of the actual world of homework/school, exercise/sports, vocational training, dealing with real ppl, etc. Now, add that to the line of ages 17/18, (where one is suppose to be banging women), and you have a very bad combination for the future. I suspect that unlike Tsar, you'd dealt with the 13/14 issues during your appropriate time frames and that your only delayed situation was the virgin thing, which is why you're doing fine today.

fully agree with this post. I am not very different from Tsar.

[Berg]

I didn't take offense to anything Ghost of S_Parc said but I do have a question for them and anyone else:

Is it really delusional and is someone such in a fantasy mindset if:

1. He want wants his first time to be with a virgin (another way of wording it is that he wants his first time to be taking a girl's virginity).
2. He wants a youthful girl
3. He wants to experience an emotional and romantic connection
4. He wants more than just the act of sex
5. If his having sex with a whore would most surely damage his pride, ego, and honor
6. That he wants his first kiss to precede sex (which means kissing a virgin girl)
7. Believing using his own money to pay a whore for sex (to lose his virginity) makes him less than a man and affirms/confirms worthless to women
8. Accepting seconds, thirds...or lasts, makes him less of a man

I don't believe it's delusional or a fantasy mindset. I think it's a personal preference and a personal choice. Why should a virgin man lose his virginity to a whore, then other men lose their virginity to virgin girls, or men that aren't virgins take the virginity of virgin girls?

Your first time desires were very complicated