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After experiencing that massive culture shock in Albuquerque, I decided it was time to go back to Mexico. And here I am in Ciudad Juarez for the fifth time, and this trip has definitely been the best one compared to the first three. Anyways here's what happened on the trip since returning from Albuquerque.
Day 1 - Not much happened. I rested in my guy friend's apartment, and then I ate a chicken sandwich for a late dinner.
Day 2 - I went busking near the cathedral and made around 30 pesos. Then I went to Augustin Melgar street to meet up with Claudia and the 50 year old woman who was only getting me single mothers as potential girlfriends, and this was the last time I saw her as I was tired of her always asking me for money. She even shot me down just for not buying 5 flauta meals to save money for the hostel. And then when I complained about Claudia falling for another guy instead of me, the 50 year old said "that's what you get for not spending a bunch of money on a girl". And then the guy Claudia fell for told me that women are the same everywhere (but thank goodness he didn't say that foreign women only wanted a green card). He is from New Mexico, which could explain his douchey alpha male behavior. The 50 year old is very likely a radical feminist since she lived in the U.S. for a while before being deported. She told me that being nice to a girl is trying to impress her (aka putting her on a pedestal); that's actually being too nice not to mention it feels unnatural. So then I finally stopped talking to them and have not gone to that part of Juarez since. On my way to the bus stop, I ran into the bad apple and her 50 year old boyfriend near the Mercado, and I was explaining to her boyfriend my situation. He said to not listen to the 50 year old woman and that she only wants my money. He also said to just be myself around women.
Day 3 -
I got checked into the hostel, and not long after, I went busking in downtown, and there I met an average-looking woman; initially she dropped some pesos into my violin case, but then a man who I met the last time I was in Juarez took me over to her. Her name is Maria. I played a few tunes for her, and then I started getting to know her. I asked her if she was hungry, she said she was, and then I told her I was hungry as well. Then I asked her if she wanted to eat with me...and she said yes. Wow, did that really turn my life around! So she and I ate flautas at an open-air restaurant a block from the cathedral. She was very curious about me, and she gave me a sincere compliment. She spend 5 dollars on both of us. And then we walked around a bit as she had to run a few little errands, but we had lively conversations. Then I got her number. Later I helped one of my good female friends Nicia (the hostel owner) in the hostel's garden. And we had intellectual conversations with one another. We did agree that people can get traumatized after a loved one passes away, but I told her America is the worst place to be when losing a loved one because of the social isolation not to mention dysfunctional people tearing you down even more.
Day 4 -
I met up with Maria in downtown when I was busking. She heard me playing, and then we had lunch at Subway. Afterwards we hit it off at the Benito Juarez Plaza. There she asked more questions about me like if I had a girlfriend and what I was planning to do in the future. And there were times where she giggled hard, like when I gave her a sincere compliment. We even held hands most of the way. Later that night she invited me for dinner at her friend's house in the west part of Ciudad Juarez. We had pollo asado, and it tasted so natural compared to KFC or McDonald's. She spent 6 dollars on both of us. But as she walked me back to downtown where I caught the bus to go back to the hostel, it was already raining. And from the bus I could see that some of streets looked a little flooded. But I got back to the hostel safely.
This was the best day so far on this trip. Maria and I went to El Parque Chamizal. At first we walked around the park for a little while. She asked me if I wanted a Mexican girlfriend or an American girlfriend, and I told her hands down I wanted a Mexican girlfriend because of how dysfunctional American women are. Then we sat by each other on a picnic bench. We gave each other long hugs and flirted with one another. How mesmerizing is that after years and years of loneliness and frustration in the U.S. Then we went to the same house we went for dinner the previous night, and we had chicken tamales. I spent 5 dollars on both of us for the dates. Then I went busking in downtown and made almost 130 pesos, being that more people go there on the weekends.
Maria and I have another date tomorrow. On Monday she's spending time with me at the hostel. And Tuesday, we're going to El Paso because a fríend of hers who lives there wants to meet me. Compared to the first three trips to Ciudad Juarez, this trip has been the best one so far. Not only I'm dating another woman, but the one I'm currently dating is a giver and not a taker. A big part of it was me getting out of my shell more. Also, I think Ciudad Juarez is more up and coming compared to when E Irizarry R&B Singer went in December 2013.
Listening to the podcast between Winston and Rock really helped me get a better understanding of the HA concept.
You're doing very well out there. So you play music on the street to make some pesos while in Mexico? Now that's an interesting idea for making money abroad. At least it can cover some basic expenses, like food for the day.
I dont know how safe it is to deal with street people, but I suppose you have enough wisdom to stay away from the true undesirables who dont value their lives.
The only thing I can say is that I wouldnt go around reminding yourself and everyone around you how much American women suck. It is true, but also you want to be careful what kind of information you're transmitting about yourself. A better story might simply be that you prefer the femininity of Mexican women (or whatever else you like about them), without complaining about American women. You aren't there to complain. Complaining makes you look like a loser, and it makes you sound like a miserable person.
Remember your complaints translate into "I can't get a woman easily." I'm not advising you to lie. I am just saying that transmits desperation, and sometimes people will get the wrong impression of you based on that.
Look for women who automatically want to please you because it pleases them. Any woman who seeks to please her man is a treasure. Even better if you don't have to ask but rather suggest.
Yeah, that is good advice. When I'm asked about it, I usually just say that I don't prefer AWs. Sometimes I go a bit further and say that they are only good for sex and not good for relationships. (Which is half-way true, since they actually aren't good for anything.) That way you insinuate that you don't have trouble getting women, but that you have preferences.
But better to have other reasons to visit a country so that women don't seem like your sole purpose. Matt speaks Spanish (presumably increasing his fluency each trip) and he performs, so he's got a lot he can say about his reasons for traveling.
As far as me telling her I prefer Mexican women over their American counterparts, all I said to her was that American women were simply unfriendly. I didn't go into full detail about how AW are dysfunctional. A big part is because many foreign women haven't been to the United States before, either that or they go there as tourists and don't spend much time there to observe people's patterns.
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