Join John Adams, world renowned Intl Matchmaker, Thurs nights 8:30 EST for Live Webcasts with FREE Prizes!
And check out Five Reasons why you should attend a FREE Live AFA Seminar! See locations and details.


Scam free! Check out Christian Filipina - Meet Asian women with Christian values! Members screened.
Exclusive book offer! 75% off! How to Meet, Date and Marry Your Filipina Wife



View Active Topics       Latest 100 Topics       View Your Posts       FAQ Topics       Switch to Mobile


Get the Dark or Tall Girl No One Wants

Discuss and talk about any general topic.

Moderators: jamesbond, fschmidt

Get the Dark or Tall Girl No One Wants

Postby MrMan » Tue Jul 14, 2015 8:59 am

When I was in Indonesia, one of my female co-workers told me that white men usually go for darker girls. I noticed that darker girls can be ignored at times, even if they have beautiful faces. Indonesians see them as less attractive because of their skin color. I'm not especially attracted to darker skin, but I don't care that much either. If a girl is beautiful, she's beautiful. My wife is reasonably fair skinned if she stays out of the sun or uses sunscreen, which she does.

I remember an Australian friend of mine in Indonesia married this Balinese girl who was absolutely gorgeous about the same time I married my (absolutely gorgeous) wife. She was a bit darker skinned. I mentioned them recently to my wife, and said his wife was pretty. We hadn't seen them in over a decade, and she said she didn't remember his wife being pretty. But I remember she was a bit dark skinned, so my wife probably wouldn't have perceived her as pretty.

The thing is, you can go to a country where dark skin is considered unattractive, and you might be able to get a much prettier girl than you otherwise would because you don't have to compete much with locals. A lot of pretty girls have a lot of 'self confidence.' They have an attitude that men are going to try to please them. Not all pretty girls are like that. It depends on how they were raised. My wife doesn't have that attitude. Someone who was raised an only child could have a similar attitude if he or she was doted on by parents and grandparents and not disciplined. But it's not a guaranteed thing that someone who is pretty or an only child will have a bad attitude from being shown favor all their lives.

I believe darker girls are considered less attractive in the Philippines and S. Korea. I would imagine this is the case also in China. I heard some kids teasing one of their dark-skinned friends in Korea using the word 'Africa' on a bus, while they giggled. Most people are fair skinned, but one of my co-workers, a receptionist for a while, who couldn't speak English, was rather dark but really pretty. Dark skinned people are kind of rare, there. But in Indonesia or the Philippines, you could find a beautiful dark girl who hasn't grown up thinking she's pretty, and who may be very thankful and overwhelmed that a white guy would show interest in her. She may feel unworthy and unevenly matched.

I mentioned in another thread that I'd seen some episodes of 'Take Me Out- Indonesia.' 'Take Me Out' is one of those game shows they use to fill up time right before prime time on TV in the US, but apparently they have farmed it out to other countries. I was fascinated by the cultural differences between the US and Indonesian. The women push buttons to reject men after seeing they are in the entertainment industry or have an entry level job, or after watching them do martial arts as the talent part. A lot of the comments from the women are marriage-focused, and the hosts wish couples they match will end up getting married. They give women a hard time for their reasons for rejecting the men, and a lot of contestants apologize for pushing the button. There is less sexual innuendo and it's all a lot more polite.

One thing I saw on the show as that some of the prettiest girls rarely got picked. They were taller than the men. I looked up the average height in Indonesia. For men it is 5'2" and for women 4'10". I knew I was considered tall there. I didn't realize the averages were so low. Maybe people are just a bit taller in Jakarta. But these girls who are rejected on the show for their height could be 5'6" (which I know because the hosts asks their height if they reject a man for being to short.) The girls often gave a man's height as a reason for rejecting him, and when they'd pick a good-looking or well-to-do shorter man, the man would pass over the prettiest models for girls who weren't as good-looking but were shorter than they were.

I don't know of beautiful tall girls will tend to be more humble that beautiful regular-sized girls. They may have grown up being considered pretty, but when they reached their full height, found that men think they are pretty, but don't show interest because they want a girl shorter than themselves.
MrMan
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 1216
Joined: Thu Jul 31, 2014 2:52 am







Re: Get the Dark or Tall Girl No One Wants

Postby GoingAwol » Tue Jul 14, 2015 9:13 pm

I love tall girls! I'm 6'3 and prefer women that are 5'9 or taller. But guess what? I still can't get a woman here in the U.S to give me the time of day.
GoingAwol
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 474
Joined: Tue May 26, 2015 10:07 am

Re: Get the Dark or Tall Girl No One Wants

Postby MrMan » Tue Jul 14, 2015 10:48 pm

Going Awol, are you tall, too? You have a lot of other tall guys to compete with in the US. Would you go for a girl who is 6'5 or 6'7? If you were 7' you might. If you went somewhere like Indonesia, girl who is 5'9 might have the difficulty of a girl who is 6'5 in the US in finding a partner. In the US, though, there are guys who would take a pretty tall girl out and try to have sex with her who wouldn't marry her because of her height. If you date an Indonesian girl, it's expected you are looking for a marriage partner. They might not want to date someone who is shorter than themselves. Being marriage-focused in dating changes the rules a bit.

Southeast Asian women also tend to marry younger. Women marry at 22.3 years old instead of 27, on average, in Indonesia as compared to the US. Americans will waste years in frivolous dating without much purpose other than having fun and think nothing of it because it is a (foolish) part of the culture. Finally, American women wise up and date with the intent to marry. Some do this after wasting their virginity, unfortunately. If you find a single girl in her mid-20's in Indonesia to date, she will likely be very marriage-minded, since she's a little late getting married. Of course, the low figure is probably influenced by the countryside where marriage ages are young, while women in the cities may marry later in their 20's.
MrMan
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 1216
Joined: Thu Jul 31, 2014 2:52 am

Re: Get the Dark or Tall Girl No One Wants

Postby MrMan » Tue Jul 14, 2015 10:48 pm

Going Awol, are you tall, too? You have a lot of other tall guys to compete with in the US. Would you go for a girl who is 6'5 or 6'7? If you were 7' you might. If you went somewhere like Indonesia, girl who is 5'9 might have the difficulty of a girl who is 6'5 in the US in finding a partner. In the US, though, there are guys who would take a pretty tall girl out and try to have sex with her who wouldn't marry her because of her height. If you date an Indonesian girl, it's expected you are looking for a marriage partner. They might not want to date someone who is shorter than themselves. Being marriage-focused in dating changes the rules a bit.

Southeast Asian women also tend to marry younger. Women marry at 22.3 years old instead of 27, on average, in Indonesia as compared to the US. Americans will waste years in frivolous dating without much purpose other than having fun and think nothing of it because it is a (foolish) part of the culture. Finally, American women wise up and date with the intent to marry. Some do this after wasting their virginity, unfortunately. If you find a single girl in her mid-20's in Indonesia to date, she will likely be very marriage-minded, since she's a little late getting married. Of course, the low figure is probably influenced by the countryside where marriage ages are young, while women in the cities may marry later in their 20's.
MrMan
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 1216
Joined: Thu Jul 31, 2014 2:52 am

Re: Get the Dark or Tall Girl No One Wants

Postby GoingAwol » Tue Jul 14, 2015 11:24 pm

MrMan wrote:Going Awol, are you tall, too? You have a lot of other tall guys to compete with in the US. Would you go for a girl who is 6'5 or 6'7? If you were 7' you might. If you went somewhere like Indonesia, girl who is 5'9 might have the difficulty of a girl who is 6'5 in the US in finding a partner. In the US, though, there are guys who would take a pretty tall girl out and try to have sex with her who wouldn't marry her because of her height. If you date an Indonesian girl, it's expected you are looking for a marriage partner. They might not want to date someone who is shorter than themselves. Being marriage-focused in dating changes the rules a bit.

Southeast Asian women also tend to marry younger. Women marry at 22.3 years old instead of 27, on average, in Indonesia as compared to the US. Americans will waste years in frivolous dating without much purpose other than having fun and think nothing of it because it is a (foolish) part of the culture. Finally, American women wise up and date with the intent to marry. Some do this after wasting their virginity, unfortunately. If you find a single girl in her mid-20's in Indonesia to date, she will likely be very marriage-minded, since she's a little late getting married. Of course, the low figure is probably influenced by the countryside where marriage ages are young, while women in the cities may marry later in their 20's.

If you read my post you would see that I clearly said i'm 6'3. So yes, i'm tall. At my height I'm taller than 90-95% of people on the planet. And yes I have a thing for tall women. I like em 5'9 or taller, preferably 6'0 or taller. But women that tall are rare. Given my height and my preferences you would think I would have no shortage of tall women willing to date me, but I don't. That goes to show you how low my sexual market value is here in the u.s
GoingAwol
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 474
Joined: Tue May 26, 2015 10:07 am

Re: Get the Dark or Tall Girl No One Wants

Postby MrMan » Wed Jul 15, 2015 12:48 am

GoingAwol wrote:If you read my post you would see that I clearly said i'm 6'3. So yes, i'm tall. At my height I'm taller than 90-95% of people on the planet. And yes I have a thing for tall women. I like em 5'9 or taller, preferably 6'0 or taller. But women that tall are rare. Given my height and my preferences you would think I would have no shortage of tall women willing to date me, but I don't. That goes to show you how low my sexual market value is here in the u.s


Sorry I missed that somehow. There do seem to be a fair number of tall men out there to date these taller women, but I don't see a lot of women over 6 feet. I read the Dutch have the tallest population on the earth, but I don't think of Holland as the best culture for producing good wives. If you like tall girls, Indonesia or the Philippines are probably not the best places for you. I hear certain regions of China have tall people. I can think of one rather tall Korean girl, but I think Koreans tend to be an inch or two shorter than Americans on average.

Why don't you think the girls like you? I have no idea what you look like. Do you think you are good looking? Are you in good shape? you could be good looking and in shape and still not find a girlfriend. It's hard to match up in the US. Back in the old days, when things were more marriage-focused, parents and community would get involved in matching people up for marriage. They still do that in Asia. In Korean churches, pastors will try to match people up. Managers in Japan do. Of course, parents do. I hear that when young people go past the age where they'd normally be married in Korea, their aunt will get their picture, strike up other conversations with other aunts at the bus stop and show pictures of their unmarried nephews and nieces and try to arrange 'meetings' (blind dates) for them. I never tried to pick girls up in bars. That would have to be a terrible situation in which to meet women.

I have very little sense of whether a guy is good-looking or not, unless he looks like an actor that women consider good-looking. Otherwise, I have to go on the reactions of women. I can tell if I think a woman is good-looking. So I can't tell if I'm good-looking or not. My mom said I was about as good-looking as Courtney Cox, the brunette off of Friends. That was back when she was young and the show was about half-way or a quarter through it's run on TV. But that's my mom. But I didn't seem to get much female attention in the US. But when I went to Jakarta, certain girls (probably not always the best wife material) would stare at me flirtatiously on occasion, overtly flirt with me, try to maneuver between my legs on the bus, and stuff like that. Of course, white=money over there, so that could be part of it. But the culture emphasizes practical stuff like providing more than looks and coolness over there, too, when it comes to marriage.

Still, I think the exotic factor and their concept of beauty there bumped me up a point or two or three on a one to ten scale as far as desirability over there. I had had this problem of being blind to interest from women I didn't consider hot, and started to stop being so naïve to that when I lived there. I can't remember the number of women I counted who I thought had sometimes subtly showed interest in me about the time I married. Probably 8 or 10 or so that I actually knew personally not counting flirtation from girls who worked at stores and such. I went from being just an average young guy to being considered a good catch, good-looking, and even well-to-do, on my teacher's salary. A lot of girls would go for a tall expat over there, too, though there aren't may 6 foot girls for you to choose from. If you like 5'7, 5'8, and up, you could probably find some girls interested if you went there and got to know people. Some of the peoples in the east of Indonesia tend to be a bit taller. You could probably find some tall very dark Papuans, or some Ambonese women who were tall. I've seen a pretty big Acehnese as well.
MrMan
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 1216
Joined: Thu Jul 31, 2014 2:52 am

Re: Get the Dark or Tall Girl No One Wants

Postby GoingAwol » Thu Jul 16, 2015 6:28 am

As far as looks go? I'm very average. I'm no Brad Pitt but I'm far from ugly. It's just average is the new ugly to American women. I have been corresponding with Russian and Ukrainian women online and they seem much more receptive to me. And guess what? They are tall too! Atleast half of the women I have seen on the site are 5'7 or taller. I'm talking to several that are between 5'8 and 5'11.
GoingAwol
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 474
Joined: Tue May 26, 2015 10:07 am

Re: Get the Dark or Tall Girl No One Wants

Postby MrMan » Thu Jul 16, 2015 9:13 am

I had a friend who went to my university who was kind of short, skinny, and pale. He was a friendly, funny guy. He travelled in Europe. In Greece, he said the women were beautiful, but they showed him no interest with all those tall Greek fit guys there. But he had girls really checking him out in Poland. If your look isn't 'marketable' in one country, you might be considered better-looking or at least exotic-looking in another. But even in your own country, you can be someone's type.
MrMan
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 1216
Joined: Thu Jul 31, 2014 2:52 am

Re: Get the Dark or Tall Girl No One Wants

Postby GoingAwol » Fri Jul 17, 2015 7:42 am

Mr.Man,
That's very true. I get the impression that Russian women like my look because they are very responsive to me and some have even told me I'm handsome. I'm tall,have broad shoulders, and have very masculine facial features and a masculine appearance overall. I get the impression that American women like pretty boys and I'm far from being a pretty boy type. So I am more marketable to Russian women than American women I suppose.
GoingAwol
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 474
Joined: Tue May 26, 2015 10:07 am


Return to General Discussions

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests