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Getting thrown out of bars for chatting up random people

Posted: April 20th, 2016, 6:41 am
by MattHanson1990
I was going to address this issue more as it wasn't really discussed, but does anyone remember getting thrown out of a bar just for chatting up random people? I'm sure that this DOES happen a lot in the US of Gay. But it happened to me last summer in Mexico. Let me share my experience.

It was during my first two week stay in Ciudad Juarez as I wanted to get better acquainted with Mexican culture and also get a break from America before I was supposed to start working on a film score with another composer. And the event I'm going to talk about took place on a Wednesday. As you may remember, the hostel I regularly stayed at relocated to a commercial district east of downtown a year ago. At the time, it was right across the street from Asenzo Cafe Bar. So that evening on Wednesday, I met up with a few people I met earlier through Nicia, the owner of the hostel. And then I saw this group of three girls going inside. So I went inside and asked if I could sit with them, and they said yes. Two of them weren't Ciudad Juarez natives. The fatter one was from Costa Rica while one of the hot ones was from El Paso but went to school in Boston. Anyways, the conversations flowed naturally, and they were much easier to get along with. Meanwhile, as I was trying to take some photos of me with the mamasitas, one of the girls asks someone at another table (co-ed group) to take photos. There were many attempts, but most of them failed; however I have two photos shown below. As the girls left, I got one of their numbers. And then I tried chatting up the co-ed group. But then a young male bartender came up to me, said something to me in Spanish, and took me outside; however, some things he said I didn't understand since my Spanish level at the time wasn't near where it is now. So I went back inside. And a few seconds later, there were two big security guards. One of them said to me "Two tables said you were being annoying. You need to leave. He will show you the door. Thanks for coming". Boy did that deflate my ego. Later, Nicia suggested to me that it would've been because people from the east part of Ciudad Juarez tend to be closed off whereas those from the western part are more open to meeting new people. Eventually, as I checked out the interior of Mexico, I realized that I was thrown out of Asenzo Cafe Bar probably because Juarez is heavily influenced from the US, and then I found out there are plenty of folks from El Paso who cross the border to go to Asenzo. So my guess is that the people I tried chatting up the moment I was thrown out were likely El Pasoans, and one of them reported me to the young male bartender. Also, El Pasoans tend to be closed off because it's still the US of Gay.

Anyways, here are the photos. From left to right: the El Paso chick, a hottie who may be from Juarez, me, the fat Costa Rican girl
Image
Image

Re: Getting thrown out of bars for chatting up random people

Posted: April 20th, 2016, 8:12 am
by cdnFA
Maybe some people just want to hang out with their friends.

Maybe you are not socially calibrated enough, especially in another culture to get the hit to sod off.

I get that here in Canada. I am reading my book and trying my best to give the cold shoulder, look away, give one word answers and they just won't get the freaking hint to sod off.

Re: Getting thrown out of bars for chatting up random people

Posted: April 21st, 2016, 8:26 am
by Jester
People are snotty and touchy and image-conscious nowadays, unless you hang around with people in villages or who grew up in village.

So a lot of this is to be expected.

And yes, Matt, you may indeed need more suave, allegre, smoothness and coolness, and tha will comein time.

What you ALREADY have, is BALLS.

HUGE balls.

+1 for asking to sit with them
+1 for being noticeable not innocuous
+1 for having the balls to post here, pics and all.

Stay thirsty, my friend!

PS Next time when the MexiGuys are chick-guarding / jealous / racists etc. try to make friends with them up front. Get them to lower their guard. As I'm sure you know, they are often very cool when they decide you view them as equals and comrades.

And as you point out in your OP, for God's sake quit hanging out in f***ed up border towns.

Re: Getting thrown out of bars for chatting up random people

Posted: April 21st, 2016, 9:15 am
by droid
The "bar/club scene" and "mall scene" are by definition western contraptions. Don't expect radically different outcomes in those.
I believe you need to settle down and try other things like school, or some job; somewhere to have repeated interactions with the same girls. Rapport is #1 south of the border.
jester wrote:What you ALREADY have, is BALLS.

HUGE balls.

+1 for asking to sit with them
+1 for being noticeable not innocuous
+1 for having the balls to post here, pics and all.
+1™

Re: Getting thrown out of bars for chatting up random people

Posted: April 22nd, 2016, 1:17 am
by Moretorque
pppppppppp




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Re: Getting thrown out of bars for chatting up random people

Posted: April 22nd, 2016, 1:25 am
by Moretorque
[
droid wrote:The "bar/club scene" and "mall scene" are by definition western contraptions. Don't expect radically different outcomes in those.
I believe you need to settle down and try other things like school, or some job; somewhere to have repeated interactions with the same girls. Rapport is #1 south of the border.
jester wrote:What you ALREADY have, is BALLS.

HUGE balls.

+1 for asking to sit with them
+1 for being noticeable not innocuous
+1 for having the balls to post here, pics and all.
+1™
[/quote]

I love how you handle yourself in bars when they try and throw you out, in T 2 you got a new Harley some new clothes and a nice pair of Sun glasses with a shot gun to boot and left the place completely trashed as you drove off on somebody else's motorcycle. :D .

Re: Getting thrown out of bars for chatting up random people

Posted: April 22nd, 2016, 2:09 am
by Eric
Those girls, are pretty!

Re: Getting thrown out of bars for chatting up random people

Posted: April 22nd, 2016, 4:46 am
by Teal Lantern
MattHanson1990 wrote: Image
The one in dark blue looks like she's getting ready to issue some talk-to-the-hand to the one in black. :lol:

Re: Getting thrown out of bars for chatting up random people

Posted: April 22nd, 2016, 1:28 pm
by droid
Moretorque wrote:
Moretorque wrote:
droid wrote:The "bar/club scene" and "mall scene" are by definition western contraptions. Don't expect radically different outcomes in those.
I believe you need to settle down and try other things like school, or some job; somewhere to have repeated interactions with the same girls. Rapport is #1 south of the border.
jester wrote:What you ALREADY have, is BALLS.
HUGE balls.
+1 for asking to sit with them
+1 for being noticeable not innocuous
+1 for having the balls to post here, pics and all.
+1™
I love how you handle yourself in bars when they try and throw you out, in T 2 you got a new Harley some new clothes and a nice pair of Sun glasses with a shot gun to boot and left the place completely trashed as you drove off on somebody else's motorcycle. :D .
If i remember well I walked in naked too!

Re: Getting thrown out of bars for chatting up random people

Posted: April 22nd, 2016, 3:18 pm
by jamesbond
Eric wrote:Those girls, are pretty!
Yes those girls do look nice. I avoid bars and clubs like the plague, even in foreign countries, the bar and club scene sucks.

Re: Getting thrown out of bars for chatting up random people

Posted: April 22nd, 2016, 6:38 pm
by droid
jamesbond wrote:
Eric wrote:Those girls, are pretty!
Yes those girls do look nice.


Come on guys, they're just "ok", only saved if they have a nice attitude. Kudos to Matt for all the improvements, but mexican chicks a re so fat... he deserves better.
jamesbond wrote:I avoid bars and clubs like the plague, even in foreign countries, the bar and club scene sucks.
It's a prepackaged concept that SUCKS ASS. Here in vietnam some guys with all the new money set up expensive venues, but because girls are traditional and mostly don't go there, it's mainly a bunch of chumps. I've checked out a handful of places just for scouting's sake and it sucks.
They actually have to hire stand-in girls for chumps to drink with (and pay for).

Quick note on those stand ins: The more chinese-looking ones are SO HOT, those long pale legs and tight asses, wow. Like 0% BMI, crazy. I have to get myself to china at some point....
But although girls here are nice, the ones at "9" or above in those settings tend to really be a lot more stupid and have an attitude, there's like an asymptote there
http://www.purplemath.com/modules/asymtote.htm

Re: Getting thrown out of bars for chatting up random people

Posted: April 22nd, 2016, 8:21 pm
by MattHanson1990
droid wrote:Kudos to Matt for all the improvements, but mexican chicks a re so fat... he deserves better.
Based on my experience in Mexico, there were different body types. Obesity is mostly affecting indomestizos and indigenous people. And it's also quite bad in the zona frontera where you'll see more American fast food joints than in the interior. On average, the girls will be more attractive the further away from the border you get. The thing is that many of them aren't slender like in Russia, Ukraine, and in Asia; and they aren't very tall. But they mostly have their fat better distributed.

Re: Getting thrown out of bars for chatting up random people

Posted: April 22nd, 2016, 11:45 pm
by Moretorque
droid wrote:
Moretorque wrote:
Moretorque wrote:


I love how you handle yourself in bars when they try and throw you out, in T 2 you got a new Harley some new clothes and a nice pair of Sun glasses with a shot gun to boot and left the place completely trashed as you drove off on somebody else's motorcycle. :D .
If i remember well I walked in naked too!
Yaa but a machine doesn't embarrass.

Re: Getting thrown out of bars for chatting up random people

Posted: April 23rd, 2016, 6:13 am
by fightforlove
Mad props to you for getting kicked out of a bar in Mexico. A+++

Yeah, try to make friends with the Mexican men, be assertive, but unassuming.

That Costa Rican would be do-able if she dropped a fast 10-20 lbs.

The El Paso girl looks pretty nice, are you still in touch with her?

Re: Getting thrown out of bars for chatting up random people

Posted: April 23rd, 2016, 7:02 am
by droid
MattHanson1990 wrote:
droid wrote:Kudos to Matt for all the improvements, but mexican chicks a re so fat... he deserves better.
Based on my experience in Mexico, there were different body types. Obesity is mostly affecting indomestizos and indigenous people. And it's also quite bad in the zona frontera where you'll see more American fast food joints than in the interior. On average, the girls will be more attractive the further away from the border you get. The thing is that many of them aren't slender like in Russia, Ukraine, and in Asia; and they aren't very tall. But they mostly have their fat better distributed.
Yeah there is no comparison to the anglo land whales. But still, it might be time you move on. Those girls would better have a decent attitude to compensate, otherwise it's not worth your time. Like I've said, maybe if you set up camp in a better city and actually enroll in school or get a job to build some circle. You still have youth man, I wish i was 26 again like you to actually do that.