S_Parc is the George Clooney of New England

[S_Parc]

Ppl, it's now out of control.

In the beginning, I didn't believe it.

Ever since Mel and I had decided to settle down ... women from all around, white (non-hispanic), Latin (any country south of the USA [including American Latinas]), East Asian (China, Korean, etc), South Asian (India, Sri Lanka, etc), middle eastern (Arabic, north/east African), etc, have been showing interest in me. And this is in the greater Boston metro area. I didn't move to Hollywood and buy myself a Lamborghini to create this effect.

If I go anywhere alone (this is w/o Mel), I get curious onlookers. I even went to dinner with a couple of guys and the waitress only asked me questions about my life. She ignored the other guys despite them being decent looking and in shape.

And finally, during a flash thundershower, a female store manager went out of the store (with her boyfriend right there waiting inside), and asked if I'd met earlier, under the store's canopy. She then introduced herself, asking for my name and when I'd be back.

Seriously, this is unbelievable. I'm getting randomly pursued by woman in the northeast, the hardest part of America to attract a woman.

I'm now, the George Clooney of New England. All it really takes is to be 'not available' and charming and all of the sudden ... women go nuts!

[Shemp]

You serious? I don't think unavailable is the whole story, if so. I think there are very subtle changes in our personality that affect how people perceive us. The whole charisma thing, or why some people were popular in high school and others were bullied. Very hard to describe these changes in words. Next to impossible to consciously and intentionally make these changes in ourselves, so as to go from unpopular to popular, though everyone from Dale Carnegie to the PUA gurus insists otherwise.

I used to be doing okay with women and now they shrink back when I go for the first kiss like I'm a monster. Dentist and a woman friend both said nothing wrong with my breath smell. Nor is my appearance much different. So must be subtle change in personality. Looks like the opposite direction of personality change happened to you since you tied the knot.

[S_Parc]

You serious? I don't think unavailable is the whole story, if so. I think there are very subtle changes in our personality that affect how people perceive us. The whole charisma thing, or why some people were popular in high school and others were bullied. Very hard to describe these changes in words. Next to impossible to consciously and intentionally make these changes in ourselves, so as to go from unpopular to popular, though everyone from Dale Carnegie to the PUA gurus insists otherwise.

I used to be doing okay with women and now they shrink back when I go for the first kiss like I'm a monster. Dentist and a woman friend both said nothing wrong with my breath smell. Nor is my appearance much different. So must be subtle change in personality. Looks like the opposite direction of personality change happened to you since you tied the knot.

I think being "unavailable", is a big part of it, though perhaps, only an aspect of the story.

Only a year (plus) ago, when I was in western MA, near upstate NY, a couple of hours from Boston, I'd gone inside a local diner and the first thing the waitress asked me was when my GF and I were going to settle down. Realize, I'd come alone and was in a transit situation. I wasn't looking for companionship nor even a bit of chitchat. But on some level, the waitress knew that I was a taken man and saw that at most, my only concern was getting a bite to eat.

[The_Adventurer]

When you're getting' some, they can smell it on you. It's like blood in the water for sharks.

[Rock]

Ppl, it's now out of control.

In the beginning, I didn't believe it.

Ever since Mel and I had decided to settle down ... women from all around, white (non-hispanic), Latin (any country south of the USA [including American Latinas]), East Asian (China, Korean, etc), South Asian (India, Sri Lanka, etc), middle eastern (Arabic, north/east African), etc, have been showing interest in me. And this is in the greater Boston metro area. I didn't move to Hollywood and buy myself a Lamborghini to create this effect.

If I go anywhere alone (this is w/o Mel), I get curious onlookers. I even went to dinner with a couple of guys and the waitress only asked me questions about my life. She ignored the other guys despite them being decent looking and in shape.

And finally, during a flash thundershower, a female store manager went out of the store (with her boyfriend right there waiting inside), and asked if I'd met earlier, under the store's canopy. She then introduced herself, asking for my name and when I'd be back.

Seriously, this is unbelievable. I'm getting randomly pursued by woman in the northeast, the hardest part of America to attract a woman.

I'm now, the George Clooney of New England. All it really takes is to be 'not available' and charming and all of the sudden ... women go nuts!

Wow, this sounds incredible. Please let's try to get to the bottom of this! If this was coming from someone else, I'd probably write them off as a troll. But you are a credible highly intelligent long term poster here.

For starters:

1. What is your apparent age meaning how old do you look? I think you've revealed that your around 35-40 chronologically.

2. What is the age range and mean/median of girls who are being drawn to you? And where do they fall on attractiveness scale?

3. How tall are you, what is your body type, and how would you rate your face? Are you more masculine or feminine style?

4. Have you read the PUA literature and if so which styles, behaviors, and attitudes fit you most closely? Which methods, gurus, etc. do you recommend? Have you read "Unchained Male" by chance?

I hope you are willing to publicly micro analyze yourself and your results for the sake of millions of young decent looking guys in North America/Anglo world who are celibate or near celibate.

After so much bitching, moaning, and endless whiny threads about American women etc., your post stands out as encouraging and inspiring. Please tell more.

[Adama]

I don't think that's it. Now I believe that when a man has a woman he's happy with, his confidence and mood are enhanced greatly. Women can tell the difference.

There was one time I had a girl, and a woman I knew at that time said she saw a difference in my personality and asked me about it.

It is a confidence shift when you are with the right woman. Like an increase in assertiveness and machisimo.

[Shemp]

@Rock: Points 1 to 3 are irrelevant, since nothing changed between before and after tying the knot. Also, he was getting sex back in the old days, with P4P while Mel held his hand, or so I recall, so it isn't that he now has p***y smell on his body/face and didn't before. It must be behavioral change. Not his personality and overall style of behaving or dressing, but what changed recently. Not that points 1 to 3 aren't interesting, but I don't want him to get side tracked on these unimportant factors. Like you, I really would like to learn from S_Parc, so please hit the important point first.

[Rock]

@Rock: Points 1 to 3 are irrelevant, since nothing changed between before and after tying the knot. Also, he was getting sex back in the old days, with P4P while Mel held his hand, or so I recall, so it isn't that he now has p***y smell on his body/face and didn't before. It must be behavioral change. Not his personality and overall style of behaving or dressing, but what changed recently. Not that points 1 to 3 aren't interesting, but I don't want him to get side tracked on these unimportant factors. Like you, I really would like to learn from S_Parc, so please hit the important point first.

I think he got some attention even before tying knot. And I think it's very important to understand Pt. 2. If he's attracting middle aged girls who range 4-6, that's not nearly as inspiring as if he's getting offers from above average looking girls in their prime. And his own apparent age and looks, Pts. 1 and 3 are relative to Pt. 2 are important to understand the amount of sexual market arbitrage he's achieving, how large the physical gap between himself and the girls are.

Cus it's likely that there are fairly firm limitations to what you can attract there even if you are doing everything as well as possible (the changeable vs. fixed factors). It's a vastly different ballgame if SParc looks like a 30 something version of George Clooney himself vs. say a 55 yr. old version Danny DeVito. Most likely, he falls in the middle somewhere. I wanna understand just where he falls plus what he's doing specifically so I can get a better idea of what's really going on and whether or not he took limits past where I assumed they were.

[Shemp]

The problem is that every time we get started on looks, people start fishing for compliments and the peanut gallery starts throwing out opinions right and left, the subject of discussion tries to get an ego boost by being called handsome, his detractors can't resist saying he's fugly, blah, blah, blah. You just know that's what will happen here.

It's all good and well to maximize our looks, but behavior is where I think most of us are failing. It doesn't matter if the women going after him are hot or not so hot. The point is there were few women before and now lots of women. I don't need inspiration. I need help fixing my personality and behavior problems.

[gsjackson]

Rock, you're the ultimate scientist of social interaction, but I just don't know if these phenomena can be reduced to useful scientific laws, or at least rules of thumb. Everybody's different.

To the extent useful generalizations can be drawn, I think Adama is probably closest to the mark. You're happier, looser, more easy-going, more confident when you've hooked up with a woman who's an unusually good match. Women want to be around happy, etc. people. The Occam's Razor explanation.

[Devon]

I agree with jackson. I had a few quality women showing interest when I was in a long term relationship - now that I'm single, almost not a peep. The sisterhood look on you kindly when you have the Stamp of Approval (ie a girlfriend).

[S_Parc]

1) For age, both Mel and I look like we're in our early 30s, despite being in the latter half. I attribute it to the extra supplements of brown seaweed, some vitamins, qigong, and regular exercise.

2) For the girls, they appear to be in the spectrum from the mid-20s to perhaps, the mid-40s. As for looks, the worst was a chunky Latina, think of Sofia Vergara's cute smile but on Rosie's body. So yeah, the excess bloat really ruined it, making her a '4 minus' instead of a '7'. And on the other end, think of the Indian star, Aishwarya Rai, an '8'. Yes, she was from Sri Lanka originally, just across the straits from India. Many of the Latinas were in the wide range between the two women. The Arab woman, however, was a perfect '10'. She'd be a movie star in either Jordan or Lebanon, if the mideast were a peaceful place to settle down in. Instead, she's trying to get into some program at Harvard As for the white women, they look like anywhere from let's say an older Kristen Dunst (~5) to a younger Sarah Michelle Gellar (7-8), as in her buffy days.

3) I'm 6'1" and since I exercise daily, I look fit. The closest famous person who resembles me a bit is a younger version of Kyle Maclachlan, however, Kyle's been aging poorly so you have to go back some fifteen years. He needs a dietician because his aging looks almost accelerated.

4) Only know about PUA from others. Don't have first hand experience with it.

I believe that what's happening, since I also observe a lot of couples out there is that many male/female duos, especially in this generation, meaning ages 25 to 45, are miserable. This is 80% of the population demographic of that cohort. Mel and I tend only do couples' things with folks in their 50s and beyond.

I suspect when one of these guys appears in front of a random woman, even if he's got a GF, that woman, whether it be Buffy, Aishwarya, or an obese Sofia, sees someone who's henpecked and looking to fondle some T/A for relief. Since Mel and I had been fondling a busty RealDoll for some time now, even the most attractive woman does nothing for me because my hands are satisfied.

If you recall from my RealDoll thread.

http://www.happierabroad.com/forum/view ... =1&t=26219

A few years ago, when I'd see a slim, big breasted woman in let's say a corporate env, my eyes would be drawn to her chest, just before I disengage the glance . Since I'd been with the doll, I had another encounter with a random busty hottie in the elevator but this time, I didn't even acknowledge her, for I'd already been fondling and suckling on the doll's DD b**bs for half a year . I only knew of the woman's rack size from my peripheral vision. This lady then turned towards me, with a bit of a surprised look/expression and asked if I were new to the firm. That's the Iron General in action

I believe that many women, on the whole, have a homewrecker's mentality. In a sense, they want what they can't have or that they feel that they're entitled to, with little work involved. And thus, we have an 80% misery rate among couples. When a man and a woman are clearly outside of that pool, they get noticed and then, the "welfare queens" show up to break 'em up and take the spoils.

[Shemp]

Just as I predicted, points 1 to 3 tell us nothing. [Edit: actually, his point 1 comment about brown seaweed might be useful. Never tried that.]

As for point 4, what he's saying is that his generally happy mood, lacking sexual neediness but also lacking the "bitch shield" that guys like me have deployed and which gets worse when a man is alone for a long time, is what attracts women. BUT he also suggests that most or perhaps all of these women he's attracting, regardless of where they rank on the HB scale, are boobie prizes and no man should envy men who actually get into relationships with boobie prize women.

All this confirms my own experience. On scale of -100 to +10, with catching AIDS and having your dick cut off and bring imprisoned on false rape charges corresponding to -100, and great sex with your soulmate corresponding to +10, and lack of all sexual pleasure, including masturbation, corresponding to 0, then for me masturbation is +8, the best whore is +7, and most women are less than 7, which is why I've been a wanker most of my life. Note that this is an experience scale, not the HB scale, so a 10 experience might only be an HB6. Looks is not that important in a long-term relationship. Personality is what matters and most women are a royal PITA where personality is concerned.