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Re: Slow Death Through Loneliness

Postby S_Parc » Wed Aug 31, 2016 6:14 pm

droid wrote:
s_parc wrote:Don't worry about ppl like Adama.

He reminds me a lot of some Jehovah's Witnesses, who spend all of their time, contemplating Armageddon, so that the Kingdom of Heaven can arise on the visible plane, and save 'em from capitalism, communism, feminism, as well as a few other *isms.


I thought that was Taco


When I said JW, I'd meant an insular personality where everything is about some exalted future event(s) and not living in the here and now. I wasn't talking about whose denomination is better than the other, as Adama immediately jumped upon, since he hates JWs along with host of other ppl.

As for Singapore, Adama doesn't know jack about it. It's practically Orange County California, but as an island in Southeast Asia. It's all about shopping, status, etc. More and more guys there, are dating women in Malaysia, Vietnam, etc, instead of local women because of the excess materialism there.
16 years ago, the Best Picture of 1999, "American Beauty", telegraphed the message of Happier Abroad to the world.

Beware of long term engagements with AWs, you may find yourself in a coffin.

AB discussion thread

BTW, despite settling down with an AW, myself, the warning is still in effect.
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Re: Slow Death Through Loneliness

Postby Adama » Wed Aug 31, 2016 6:29 pm

S_Parc wrote:Adama immediately jumped upon, since he hates JWs along with host of other ppl.



I said they are enemies of the gospel. I did not say they are my enemies or that I hate them. Who is the host of other ppl I hate?
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Re: Slow Death Through Loneliness

Postby Adama » Wed Aug 31, 2016 6:55 pm

S_Parc wrote:I'd meant an insular personality where everything is about some exalted future event(s) and not living in the here and now.



Like those men who are worried about a possible future divorce 20 years from now? Instead of loving the women they have, they are so afraid of the mere possibility that they could be destroyed. They even run away to the other side of the world because of this fear. Literally couldn't run any farther than SEA. That is allowing fear to control you. Same as allowing some future possibility of something bad happening keeping you from enjoying your wife today. Is this what you meant by the future vs here and now?

Why is it you are in MA and married to an American woman? Isn't that dangerous? Don't you have money? Why would you risk your life?

I tell you. They can take 50% of your assets, but so what. The solution to that certainly isn't to move to Asia to earn less money to prevent the future of possibly losing money. Can men get utterly destroyed in divorce? Yes. Does it happen to many men? No, otherwise there would not be two, and three time divorced men. If each divorce caused a suicide, then there would be no second time divorced men. There is loss of assets. Then there is emotional devastation. I don't think these men are left destitute.
Look for women who automatically want to please you because it pleases them. Any woman who seeks to please her man is a treasure. Even better if you don't have to ask but rather suggest.
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Re: Slow Death Through Loneliness

Postby S_Parc » Wed Aug 31, 2016 7:07 pm

Adama wrote:
S_Parc wrote:Adama immediately jumped upon, since he hates JWs along with host of other ppl.



I said they are enemies of the gospel. I did not say they are my enemies or that I hate them. Who is the host of other ppl I hate?


A reference to the infamous dialogue between you and Yohan

http://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=31456&start=60
16 years ago, the Best Picture of 1999, "American Beauty", telegraphed the message of Happier Abroad to the world.

Beware of long term engagements with AWs, you may find yourself in a coffin.

AB discussion thread

BTW, despite settling down with an AW, myself, the warning is still in effect.
S_Parc
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Re: Slow Death Through Loneliness

Postby Adama » Wed Aug 31, 2016 7:13 pm

S_Parc wrote:
Adama wrote:
S_Parc wrote:Adama immediately jumped upon, since he hates JWs along with host of other ppl.



I said they are enemies of the gospel. I did not say they are my enemies or that I hate them. Who is the host of other ppl I hate?


A reference to the infamous dialogue between you and Yohan

http://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=31456&start=60


Not worth my time to investigate what you're on about.
Look for women who automatically want to please you because it pleases them. Any woman who seeks to please her man is a treasure. Even better if you don't have to ask but rather suggest.
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Re: Slow Death Through Loneliness

Postby S_Parc » Wed Aug 31, 2016 7:18 pm

Adama wrote:
S_Parc wrote:I'd meant an insular personality where everything is about some exalted future event(s) and not living in the here and now.


Why is it you are in MA and married to an American woman? Isn't that dangerous? Don't you have money? Why would you risk your life?

I tell you. They can take 50% of your assets, but so what. The solution to that certainly isn't to move to Asia to earn less money to prevent the future of possibly losing money. Can men get utterly destroyed in divorce? Yes. Does it happen to many men? No, otherwise there would not be two, and three time divorced men. If each divorce caused a suicide, then there would be no second time divorced men. There is loss of assets. Then there is emotional devastation. I don't think these men are left destitute.


Actually, many of these men, don't know women, and clearly, don't know 'em well.

For me, I'd known my wife for eons and I'm even good friends with her dad. I'd gained a father which I never had emotionally, growing up. This is far more than just some young guy falling in love and throwing caution to the wind. Many of those aforementioned ppl are my currently unhappily married or divorced cohort. As for Mel, it would be worth risking losing her in the end, than in never having tried. The problem is that I can't say that for anyone else, including my Brazilian ex-GF from 7 years ago. I could live alone like Bosstone and prosper, but since that option is always there, at least for some time of my life and hopefully for the rest of it, I'd rather spend it with her than w/ anyone else.

As for the culture of Singapore ... it's very close to Southern California but Chinese majority, as oppose to white. So with the angle that the guy is kinda a fish out of water, w/o a true grasp of his situation, why shouldn't he be apprehensive?
16 years ago, the Best Picture of 1999, "American Beauty", telegraphed the message of Happier Abroad to the world.

Beware of long term engagements with AWs, you may find yourself in a coffin.

AB discussion thread

BTW, despite settling down with an AW, myself, the warning is still in effect.
S_Parc
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Joined: Fri Nov 12, 2010 7:01 pm

Re: Slow Death Through Loneliness

Postby Adama » Wed Aug 31, 2016 7:26 pm

S_Parc wrote:
Adama wrote:
S_Parc wrote:I'd meant an insular personality where everything is about some exalted future event(s) and not living in the here and now.


Why is it you are in MA and married to an American woman? Isn't that dangerous? Don't you have money? Why would you risk your life?

I tell you. They can take 50% of your assets, but so what. The solution to that certainly isn't to move to Asia to earn less money to prevent the future of possibly losing money. Can men get utterly destroyed in divorce? Yes. Does it happen to many men? No, otherwise there would not be two, and three time divorced men. If each divorce caused a suicide, then there would be no second time divorced men. There is loss of assets. Then there is emotional devastation. I don't think these men are left destitute.


Actually, many of these men, don't know women, and clearly, don't know 'em well.

For me, I'd known my wife for eons and I'm even good friends with her dad. I'd gained a father which I never had emotionally, growing up. This is far more than just some young guy falling in love and throwing caution to the wind. Many of those aforementioned ppl are my currently unhappily married or divorced cohort. As for Mel, it would be worth risking losing her in the end, than in never having tried. The problem is that I can't say that for anyone else, including my Brazilian ex-GF from 7 years ago. I could live alone like Bosstone and prosper, but since that option is always there, at least for some time of my life and hopefully for the rest of it, I'd rather spend it with her than w/ anyone else.

As for the culture of Singapore ... it's very close to Southern California but Chinese majority, as oppose to white. So with the angle that the guy is kinda a fish out of water, w/o a true grasp of his situation, why shouldn't he be apprehensive?


It's been said before, you can die in the shower, crossing the street, by lightning and numerous other accidents. Does that stop you from getting out of bed in the morning? That would be hopeless, thinking about all the possible accidents you could run into, while you're lying in bed, talking yourself out of getting out of bed. It sounds to me like women are too dangerous for most of these men to interact with. Always that possibility of danger lurking underneath. Better to avoid women altogether, since there is no defense.
Look for women who automatically want to please you because it pleases them. Any woman who seeks to please her man is a treasure. Even better if you don't have to ask but rather suggest.
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Re: Slow Death Through Loneliness

Postby S_Parc » Wed Aug 31, 2016 7:43 pm

Adama wrote:
S_Parc wrote:
Adama wrote:Why is it you are in MA and married to an American woman? Isn't that dangerous? Don't you have money? Why would you risk your life?

I tell you. They can take 50% of your assets, but so what. The solution to that certainly isn't to move to Asia to earn less money to prevent the future of possibly losing money. Can men get utterly destroyed in divorce? Yes. Does it happen to many men? No, otherwise there would not be two, and three time divorced men. If each divorce caused a suicide, then there would be no second time divorced men. There is loss of assets. Then there is emotional devastation. I don't think these men are left destitute.


Actually, many of these men, don't know women, and clearly, don't know 'em well.

For me, I'd known my wife for eons and I'm even good friends with her dad. I'd gained a father which I never had emotionally, growing up. This is far more than just some young guy falling in love and throwing caution to the wind. Many of those aforementioned ppl are my currently unhappily married or divorced cohort. As for Mel, it would be worth risking losing her in the end, than in never having tried. The problem is that I can't say that for anyone else, including my Brazilian ex-GF from 7 years ago. I could live alone like Bosstone and prosper, but since that option is always there, at least for some time of my life and hopefully for the rest of it, I'd rather spend it with her than w/ anyone else.

As for the culture of Singapore ... it's very close to Southern California but Chinese majority, as oppose to white. So with the angle that the guy is kinda a fish out of water, w/o a true grasp of his situation, why shouldn't he be apprehensive?


It's been said before, you can die in the shower, crossing the street, by lightning and numerous other accidents. Does that stop you from getting out of bed in the morning? That would be hopeless, thinking about all the possible accidents you could run into, while you're lying in bed, talking yourself out of getting out of bed. It sounds to me like women are too dangerous for most of these men to interact with. Always that possibility of danger lurking underneath. Better to avoid women altogether, since there is no defense.


Normal daily incidents ... like getting into an accident or even credit card fraud, etc, are merely thorns in the way of life. Anyone can adapt to wearing a cast (plus eating Codeine), buying identity insurance while filing police reports, etc, however... a relationship with a woman is different.

That guy in my other thread, let me repaste it here ...

S_Parc wrote:And if you want to know about single moms, there's a senior managing director of IT, who's footing the tuition bill for his step-daughter, whom he met when she was 14, because that when he'd started dating her mother. And no, she's not attending a UMass campus but one of the most expensive private colleges in the region not named Harvard/MIT. What a waste of money! Seriously, if you're not attending Harvard Law School then you might as well take the delta of that private school tuition vs let's say Framingham State's tuition, and throw it into the bonfire. But no, the mother feels like her daughter deserves the "best", outside of the big H :roll:


Is getting his life bamboozled by this woman & her daughter. And BTW, she's a Chinese immigrant, not even a 2nd generation American. It's not as simple as shrugging off a busted knee cap during a hockey game. There are long term emotional scars from these kinds of relationships.

If you recall the famous story of the 'Lost Battalion' of World War I, Major Whittlesey, who was only able to get less than 40% of his men out of that triangulation in the Argonne Forest, had committed suicide only a few years after the Armistice. Those events had haunted him and he was never quite whole again, esp given all the attention he was given after the war. The 2001 movie doesn't even mention that point, as it's trying to be inspirational.
16 years ago, the Best Picture of 1999, "American Beauty", telegraphed the message of Happier Abroad to the world.

Beware of long term engagements with AWs, you may find yourself in a coffin.

AB discussion thread

BTW, despite settling down with an AW, myself, the warning is still in effect.
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Re: Slow Death Through Loneliness

Postby Adama » Wed Aug 31, 2016 7:57 pm

He should just tell the wife and the step daughter "no." That is easier than it seems. But the problem is, since we know he is already in that situation, he probably didn't know enough to pick a woman who wouldn't dare boss him. You pick one of those chicks who bosses you around and it wont matter which side of the earth you live on. She will make your life miserable. This is common sense really. He obviously never stood up for himself with his wife. If he had known better, he wouldn't marry a woman who would do such things to him. He would have eliminated her the first time she tried to boss him or pull a stunt.

That's right she's Chinese cause nationality doesn't matter as much as we think it does. It matters who is the man and who is the woman. If you allow the woman to boss you around like she's the man, then you're in for terrible mistreatment.
Look for women who automatically want to please you because it pleases them. Any woman who seeks to please her man is a treasure. Even better if you don't have to ask but rather suggest.
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Re: Slow Death Through Loneliness

Postby S_Parc » Wed Aug 31, 2016 8:06 pm

Adama wrote:He should just tell the wife and the step daughter "no." That is easier than it seems. But the problem is, since we know he is already in that situation, he probably didn't know enough to pick a woman who wouldn't dare boss him. You pick one of those chicks who bosses you around and it wont matter which side of the earth you live on. She will make your life miserable. This is common sense really. He obviously never stood up for himself with his wife. If he had known better, he wouldn't marry a woman who would do such things to him. He would have eliminated her the first time she tried to boss him or pull a stunt.

That's right she's Chinese cause nationality doesn't matter as much as we think it does. It matters who is the man and who is the woman. If you allow the woman to boss you around like she's the man, then you're in for terrible mistreatment.


A lot of these women are not bossy in the beginning. The result of the above is a case where the guy shouldn't have dated a single mom, to begin with, and two, have observed/experienced enough relationships, to know when women flip from the courtship phase to that of actual living.

I've known lots of women, from varying backgrounds, who make the switch somewhere in the middle. All and all, the fact that Mel and I don't waste our energies, controlling each other, has led to my George Clooney-hood in New England society. And what my Clooney-hood tells me is that women are the problem, not the fact that I've suddenly become attractive as a result of tying the knot.
16 years ago, the Best Picture of 1999, "American Beauty", telegraphed the message of Happier Abroad to the world.

Beware of long term engagements with AWs, you may find yourself in a coffin.

AB discussion thread

BTW, despite settling down with an AW, myself, the warning is still in effect.
S_Parc
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Re: Slow Death Through Loneliness

Postby Adama » Wed Aug 31, 2016 8:26 pm

A feminist isn't going to go out of her way to please a man. It would be obvious they're faking it. It isn;t about controlling the other partner. It's about the natural biological roles.
Look for women who automatically want to please you because it pleases them. Any woman who seeks to please her man is a treasure. Even better if you don't have to ask but rather suggest.
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Re: Slow Death Through Loneliness

Postby Ghost » Thu Sep 01, 2016 8:10 am

You're unbearably naive and can afford to be so because you don't have a woman, nor any serious prior experience with women. I keep bringing this up not to belittle you personally but to point out how bad this makes your advice and anti-wisdom in your posts: you're posting from a standpoint of made-up beliefs that have no bearing upon reality, while I and others with experience speak from having been through the mess that is women.
Last edited by Ghost on Fri Oct 14, 2016 8:44 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Slow Death Through Loneliness

Postby S_Parc » Thu Sep 01, 2016 12:49 pm

Ghost wrote:You're unbearably naive and can afford to be so because you don't have a woman, nor any serious prior experience with women. I keep bringing this up not to belittle you personally but to point out how bad this makes your advice and anti-wisdom in your posts: you're posting from a standpoint of made-up beliefs that have little bearing upon reality, while I and others with experience speak from having been through the mess that is women.


This is known as armchair quarterbacking, a person who is not a quarterback (or general, etc.), but offers opinions and criticism on the performance or decisions of those who are.

I'm in a happy relationship and all around me, I see unhappy ones.

The couples whom we hang out with, tend to be a decade or more, older than us. That doesn't bode well for the younger generations.
16 years ago, the Best Picture of 1999, "American Beauty", telegraphed the message of Happier Abroad to the world.

Beware of long term engagements with AWs, you may find yourself in a coffin.

AB discussion thread

BTW, despite settling down with an AW, myself, the warning is still in effect.
S_Parc
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Re: Slow Death Through Loneliness

Postby Nomad » Thu Sep 01, 2016 1:02 pm

I don't see much wisdom in Adam's current posts.

From my understanding, it would be like recruits in the army. The men are afraid because they are about to hit the beach running. Bombs will be dropping, bullets wizzing by, mines to be evaded, and the prospect that any second could be your last, is met with: "What are you worrying about? As long as you have a helment on, a rifle in your hand, and some body armor, YOU'LL BE FINE!"

As others have pointed out, its not women we fear, but the government destroying our lives. You can judge and evaluate women, use the best of Gods wisdom to discern if she is the right one for you, but you can never nor ever, control women. They have God given free will. And can choose to change over-time, thus ensuring a divorce 20 years later.

Lets not forget that even inspite such risks, men still get married regardless, but to say that they "made mistakes" as if there is perfect choices, is a very limited and narrow mindset. There is no perfect answer and no perfect choice. There is only a lot of options, some leading to better lives and others, leading to hell.

Government in this current climate, can literally incarcerate any man who divorces and is under their jurisdiction to pay alimony. Failure to do so is met with a Prison sentence. Thats right, your only crime is getting married.

Women already have, and been known to abuse this. There is always the saying, Prepare for the worst, hope for the best, and your odds are better than those who don't prepare, but to act as if you just have to make perfect choices perfectly for the next 50 years.. get out of here. There is no perfect solution to all lifes problems, and no man should be subjected to this type of torment and evil in his life just because he said "I do" to the wrong one.
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Re: Slow Death Through Loneliness

Postby S_Parc » Thu Sep 01, 2016 1:27 pm

Nomad wrote:I don't see much wisdom in Adam's current posts.

From my understanding, it would be like recruits in the army. The men are afraid because they are about to hit the beach running. Bombs will be dropping, bullets wizzing by, mines to be evaded, and the prospect that any second could be your last, is met with: "What are you worrying about? As long as you have a helment on, a rifle in your hand, and some body armor, YOU'LL BE FINE!"

As others have pointed out, its not women we fear, but the government destroying our lives. You can judge and evaluate women, use the best of Gods wisdom to discern if she is the right one for you, but you can never nor ever, control women. They have God given free will. And can choose to change over-time, thus ensuring a divorce 20 years later.


That's one of the reasons why I'd brought up the 'Lost Battalion', as a metaphor for that kind of trauma.

Nomad wrote:Lets not forget that even inspite such risks, men still get married regardless, but to say that they "made mistakes" as if there is perfect choices, is a very limited and narrow mindset. There is no perfect answer and no perfect choice. There is only a lot of options, some leading to better lives and others, leading to hell.

Government in this current climate, can literally incarcerate any man who divorces and is under their jurisdiction to pay alimony. Failure to do so is met with a Prison sentence. Thats right, your only crime is getting married.

Women already have, and been known to abuse this. There is always the saying, Prepare for the worst, hope for the best, and your odds are better than those who don't prepare, but to act as if you just have to make perfect choices perfectly for the next 50 years.. get out of here. There is no perfect solution to all lifes problems, and no man should be subjected to this type of torment and evil in his life just because he said "I do" to the wrong one.


I'm beginning to think that *pinning the tail on the govt donkey*, isn't the full story here.

As with the World War I metaphor, I believe a big part of the issue is that of modern industrialization and the diminutive value of the average life. Realize, prior to WWI, soldiers fought with single round muskets, swords, as well as hand-to-hand combat skills. WWI, with its continuous fire machine guns, heavy artillery, poison gas, tanks, etc, changed that forever. Things like martial arts/boxing, etc, were relegated to hobbyists, much like ham radio, not to the professional soldier. Going along with that metaphor, as ppl had left the small farms, small workshops, small shipping boats, etc, they lost more and more control of their lives. Larger and larger corporate or govt entities, started dividing up ppl, as a resource. When a society is based around such large scale machinations, isn't it feasible that the relationships between men and women, since it's "highly inefficient", would go into decline as well?

As more and more societies become like America/UK of the early 1900s, the phenomena grows to a global level, not just the original industrial states. So what's an aftershock wave in the Anglosphere, soon grows into a global wave, where more and more ppl feel the effects of this type of dehumanization and insensitivity. Remember, the so-called happy 1950s was a cultural phenomena, akin to the internal Marshall Plan, where Anglosphere was made to look better than the cold hand of Soviet Communism. But as Ned Beatty said in the movie, 'Network', it's all about the big corporations and the strings that they pull, not ppl. So with the yolk of communism removed, the effects of global industrialization are re-exerted on the populace, as a whole. And in this case, the govt is merely a partner in arms, with the corporate powers.
16 years ago, the Best Picture of 1999, "American Beauty", telegraphed the message of Happier Abroad to the world.

Beware of long term engagements with AWs, you may find yourself in a coffin.

AB discussion thread

BTW, despite settling down with an AW, myself, the warning is still in effect.
S_Parc
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