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Keeping Maids

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Keeping Maids

Postby MrMan » May 1st, 2017, 5:29 am

In Indonesia, it is common for middle class people to have maids. Indonesia exports maids around the world.

But it's hard to keep a maid in Indonesia. When my kids were small, two of them, were 4 and 1, we were renting a huge house with tile floors that required a lot of mopping. The kids made a messes, and we'd go through maids really fast. One in her late teens just disappeared and left the gate open. I assume she wanted to leave while we weren't there. Another stole my really cheap cell phone and my really cheap watch and left after one night.

If they'd have told us they were leaving, we would have told them how we felt about it, but we'd have paid them for every day they work.

When my kids were older, we had a one year contract with a maid we got through an agency. She did really well for three months. My wife and I were both pleased with her. She cooked, cleaned, and was pretty good to the kids who couldn't really understand her.

She would talk to herself a bit. But we were overall happy with her work. She was widowed or divorced and her children were grown. We didn't owe her days off according to the contract, but we'd let her take a day or so off out of the house every month. After three months, she told us she thought we'd agreed to giving her a 20% raise every three months. In several years, I would have had a second job to pay her salary at that rate. The contract said 10% after a year. It was a holiday when we had the discussion, and we were going to let her visit relatives if we went out of town, but our kids got sick, so we asked her to stay and take a day off some other day. We went to visit someone who was sick, and left the kids at home. Our daughter called us and told us the maid wasn't around and the kids were hungry. I was upset for her leaving the kids. The oldest was a teen, though, but he doesn't cook anything. We got footage of her leaving the elevator with a big plastic bag. My wife said it was bigger than the bag she came in with. I don't know about that. She could have bought some stuff on her trips.

We contacted her relative, who said she hadn't come by. He suspected she might have run off with a man. My wife said it seemed like she was flirting with the guy who painted our walls.

Anyway, my wife thought she might have been to nice with this maid. She said a lot of the Chinese are strict and bossy with their maids and they stick around forever. Maybe if you are tough with the maids, that makes them 'know their place' and stick around. If you aren't strict with them, maybe they leave you. (This sounds almost like 'game'. :) ).

We are thinking about getting a maid, so I'm wondering about this.

It seems like a lot of guys here are in their home country thinking about living abroad. What about you guys who've had maids before. Does being strict with them help them to stick around rather than other strategies like paying above market, giving days off that other maids don't get, and just being nice to them?
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Re: Keeping Maids

Postby MrMan » May 1st, 2017, 5:37 am

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Last edited by MrMan on May 1st, 2017, 5:38 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Keeping Maids

Postby MrMan » May 1st, 2017, 5:38 am

Btw, some people say Javanese maids are better for being submissive and sticking around than Sundanese, in an Indonesian context. We've had both. We had a Papuan maid, too. My wife was friends with the Papuan, but then she inherited some money, but she went back to work with us when we went to Indonesian, but seemed kind of bossy, trying to tell my wife what to do with our baby and stuff like that. It didn't work out.

The Sundanese didn't stick around that well. But the Javanese weren't that much better at sticking around when our kids were little and there was a heavy work load. We even tried two maids, or a maid and a nanny, but it was still hard to keep maids more than a few months. Some of them were marrying age or young married women, so I can understand not wanting to stick around forever.

The big problem people with maids has is they let them have the big Idul Fitre Islamic holiday off, pay them a bonus, and they don't come back. They don't tell you if they aren't going to work for you anymore, most of the time.

Javanese culture emphasizes submitting to authority, making people feel comfortable, etc. They tend to be polite and hide their feelings. I can think of some individuals who vary from that, but it's generally true. Sundanese are known for getting divorced and remarried a lot. The philosophy is that it is better to have been married and divorced than never to have married at all.

The maid we had that I told about in the last post was Sundanese. I don't know if she ran off with the painter, for sure, but that was our operative theory when she disappeared. She'd also only worked a few days past her last payday. We'd have paid her for every day she'd worked even though she violated her contract.

Does anyone have any experience with Indonesian maids who moved overseas? I know a guy who took a nanny back to a developed country with strict immigration laws, on some kind of visa, but it wasn't a work visa, and she started demanding American wages and they let her go.
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Re: Keeping Maids

Postby Kradmelder » May 1st, 2017, 6:55 am

It is common here to have all sorts of problems eith darkie maids from thievery, pilfering, absenteeism, constand demands. And i dont wqnt darkies using my toilet or cutlery or their hands on my food stuffs.

They are also a security risk.u For money or unknowingly they give away information about your hours, habits, where beams are located, the radio, gun safe etc.

So i have gone to a white maid. It looks like it costs more but she brings her own appliances so no more broken vacuums and irons, i dont have to provide lunch, she brings her own chemicals, and no 13th cheque. Also far less breakages. You also help employ white people.
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Re: Keeping Maids

Postby Contrarian Expatriate » May 1st, 2017, 6:59 am

Kradmelder wrote:So i have gone to a white maid. It looks like it costs more but she brings her own appliances so no more broken vacuums and irons, i dont have to provide lunch, she brings her own chemicals, and no 13th cheque. Also far less breakages. You also help employ white people.

We can only hope to hear that it is your white maid who does you in in an ironic twist.
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Re: Keeping Maids

Postby Cornfed » May 1st, 2017, 7:37 am

MrMan wrote:I know a guy who took a nanny back to a developed country with strict immigration laws, on some kind of visa, but it wasn't a work visa, and she started demanding American wages and they let her go.

So who is the bad guy in that situation?
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Re: Keeping Maids

Postby Cornfed » May 1st, 2017, 7:39 am

Contrarian Expatriate wrote:
Kradmelder wrote:So i have gone to a white maid. It looks like it costs more but she brings her own appliances so no more broken vacuums and irons, i dont have to provide lunch, she brings her own chemicals, and no 13th cheque. Also far less breakages. You also help employ white people.

We can only hope to hear that it is your white maid who does you in in an ironic twist.

Just like if one of your mudsharks does you in.
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Re: Keeping Maids

Postby Kradmelder » May 1st, 2017, 8:01 am

Cornfed wrote:
Contrarian Expatriate wrote:
Kradmelder wrote:So i have gone to a white maid. It looks like it costs more but she brings her own appliances so no more broken vacuums and irons, i dont have to provide lunch, she brings her own chemicals, and no 13th cheque. Also far less breakages. You also help employ white people.

We can only hope to hear that it is your white maid who does you in in an ironic twist.

Just like if one of your mudsharks does you in.


A mudshark would not even be suitable as a maid. Cant have someone touching a darkie then touching your clothes and foodstuffs.

Better to deal with a proper darkie than a mudshark. A darkie trying to make a living supporting her troop of pekkies is preferable to a mudshark defiling her own race.
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Re: Keeping Maids

Postby MrMan » May 1st, 2017, 6:13 pm

Can we not wish each other dead?
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Re: Keeping Maids

Postby Contrarian Expatriate » May 2nd, 2017, 4:16 am

MrMan wrote:Can we not wish each other dead?

That was not my thought, but now that you bring it up, Krad and Cornfed shall get whatever Karma deems suitable given their depraved dispositions. I can't say I would miss them.....

8)
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Re: Keeping Maids

Postby droid » May 2nd, 2017, 6:35 am

[quote="MrMan]...[/quote]

I'm a bit shocked by this, I thought you were the liberal guy here, but you are referring to them like monkeys on a leash or something. Some of these people are under duress and expecting them to stay in a room like a pet 29 days of the month is messed up. Not even the hardcore racist members here have expressed this kind of stuff (aside from mass murder lol).

I've seen how higher "class" people treat these maids in the third world, constraining them to a small room behind the kitchen and even having a lock on the fridge so 'they don't eat too much'. I myself would feel uncomfortable with someone sharing my space under that kind of serfdom. Mind you a girl comes to clean my place threee times a week and they iron my clothes in the hotels but those are non-indentured people so to speak.
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
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Re: Keeping Maids

Postby MrMan » May 2nd, 2017, 6:56 am

droid wrote:[quote="MrMan]...[/quote]

I'm a bit shocked by this, I thought you were the liberal guy here, but you are referring to them like monkeys on a leash or something. Some of these people are under duress and expecting them to stay in a room like a pet 29 days of the month is messed up. Not even the hardcore racist members here have expressed this kind of stuff (aside from mass murder lol).

I've seen how higher "class" people treat these maids in the third world, constraining them to a small room behind the kitchen and even having a lock on the fridge so 'they don't eat too much'. I myself would feel uncomfortable with someone sharing my space under that kind of serfdom. Mind you a girl comes to clean my place threee times a week and they iron my clothes in the hotels but those are non-indentured people so to speak.[/quote]


I didn't say anything about maids being like a monkey on a leash. I think you may be reading some things you've read about maids in the past into my posts or something like that. A lot of maids we had in Indonesia were from some distant part of Java or somewhere else. They live with us. Most of them didn't have somewhere to go during the month. They take a couple of weeks off a year and go home to the village. If they want to go somewhere, they can let us know. If they want a day off, they can discuss it with us. They aren't prisoners. But I don't want them to disappear without saying anything, especially if they are staying with the kids and we are out. The problem is maids just disappearing. That's common in Indonesia. Also, if a maid has worked days she hasn't been paid for, I want to pay that before they leave, too, even if they violate a contract. Disappearing doesn't give me a chance to do that.

The Sundanese one I thought was going to stick around had access to the elevator key card. We'd leave her home alone. If she wanted to steal the TV and leave, she could have. We trusted her. We didn't lock them up like a prisoner. I also let her know if she wanted to use the pool or the hot tub in the building, she could do so. She wasn't interested, I guess.

We never locked the fridge to keep the maids out. They ate what we ate. My wife might have told them not to eat certain foods like a lump of Mozzarella brought from America or jars of olives, but Indonesian maids wouldn't eat that stuff anyway. But in general, they eat whatever we eat.

We had one maid on a one-year contract. It's a little unrealistic to think that means she's going to stick around if she doesn't want to. The part about being strict had to do with how you talk to them, not locking them up or hitting them or something cruel like that.

Btw, I'm not 'liberal.' I'm not a white supremicist, but that doesn't make me 'liberal.' I'm a social conservative.

The maid room is usually smaller, but it's got a place to sleep and store some of their belongings, usually.
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Re: Keeping Maids

Postby droid » May 2nd, 2017, 7:27 am

I understand MrMan, I didn't say you were literally using 'monkey' and 'leash', just commenting on the tone.
Like I said, that's a duress position people find themselves in, as most people would not want that, so it's probably no surprise they disappear as soon as the painter makes some semi-serious proposal lol.
Not trying to flame you, but how much do they make per month there? As in any exchange the solution would be to pay some more i guess.
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
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Re: Keeping Maids

Postby MarcosZeitola » May 2nd, 2017, 9:01 am

I have always had maids ever since I established my family in the Philippines. We have one currently. At one point we even had two. They are live-in, eat with us, help with cooking, cleaning and household chores. Their wages are ridiculously low, amounting to around $100 dollars a month.
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Re: Keeping Maids

Postby Yohan » May 2nd, 2017, 6:14 pm

Japanese people strongly dislike the idea of live-in maids.
My wife wants to do all by herself, or with our children or with friends etc.

In Japan if you cannot do it yourself, you call for a service, there are companies for that. A group of people will come, clean or wash or whatever you need, and if the work is done, they go.

Food is the same, you order and it will be delivered, for parties all will be served and when finished, all plates etc. will be taken away again.

What you cannot wash yourself, call a laundry nearby, they come and pick it up. etc.

No maids in general, there is no visa for such a job in case of a foreigner, and most Japanese anyway will refuse such a work.

In our office we could register a Filipina as 'general office staff' long time ago, who did all the office cleaning and any kind of simple work also for my boss etc., she did this about 28 years up to retirement last year. Now her daughter took over the job of the mother.
Her salary is about USD 1600,- free room and utilities, ticket to visit Cebu once a year, 1 month fully paid vacation, full health insurance cover etc.

In Japan a working permit for a foreign maid is not easy to get, employment contracts are not really so cheap.
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