A German immigrant's interesting observations about America

[E_Irizarry]

America is generally not a great place for intellectuals to bloom ( unless you get a PhD and become a college professor), but it is an excellent place for a little guy to make something of himself or for a refugee from a dictatorial government to start a new life. And yes, to a German, America is very prudish.

This is why I stopped hanging around American ex-pats in every country I've gone to: they are too too prudish. For example, a couple of weeks ago, my brain was preoccupied with trouble at my English-teaching job. I had borrowed money from an American that is my co-worker here (yup, you probably know where this is going by now).

MInd you, I have paid him back a couple of times before; it takes me 1.5 to 2 times longer to pay him back as fast as he lent it to me.

So I got paid the day before and he just got his money because he just quit but didn't get a chance to pick up his last check until the day after. So it literally went like this,

He: "What's up, man? How was your day today?"
I: "It was fine. What are you doing now?"
He: "Nothing."
I: "Yeah. I'm going to next door to pick up some groceries."
He: (then he comes along)

We're food-shopping, and then right before we get onto the queue in order to check out, this is what happened:

He: "Dude, you got my money?"
I: "I told you that I will give it to you; I terribly forgot about it. We see each other at least 3 times a week"
He: (started yelling and got emotional) "Man! I gave you many chances to pay me back RIGHT AT ONCE because whenever you needed money, I gave you money all at once"
I: "Yeah you're absolutely correct, but you know I pay you back, man. I just don't pay you back all at once because you know I don't make shit at this job, but my intentions are to pay you back as THE EXACT WAY you lent money to me".
He: "You're missing the point!"
I: "Man, tried to be nice and pay you back by treating you to your own 18"-pizza"
He: "If I'd known you were going to do that, I would have spent that money on meals instead of a pizza that only lasts for one sitting"

Then we both walked to his house lugging groceries in our plastic bags and he's bitchin' and complain' the whole time.

Then he finally said in the midst of it all, "You know I'm prude, man. I expect more and no less when it comes to things like that, man."

While he was putting his groceries, I said, "Yo man. I have to go and put away my groceries at my house (which was 20 minutes away on foot)". He didn't hear me. Then I got a call on my cellular 5 minutes later. It was him, and I picked up. He was like, "Hey man I thought you were going to stay here and cook with me." Mentally I screamed, "ARE YOU f***ing KIDDING ME? AFTER ALL THAT EMOTIONAL SHIT YOU DUMPED TENFOLD ON ME??"
Then I literaly said to him, "Nah man. I have to get these groceries home. I'll talk to you later."

He: "Peace."
I: "Peace out."
-End of conversation-

And then it dawned on me mentally and internally i said to myself, "Damn. Everytime you don't EXACTLY give back to an American or one doesn't anticipate in etiquette or favors well ahead of time, then that person holds you accountable for that."

So I cannot hangout with American ex-pats anymore because their expectancy level is CONSTANTLY MONITORING me while "building rapport". The moment one miscalculates the SLIGHTEST move, you get called out on it or get laughed or disrespected on or have it thrown in your face that you're one that f***ed up.

No more Western/Americanized offline friends for me, guys.

PS: I paid him back for the last time and now he and I are "even Steven".

[gmm567]

I don't know dude...you best off not asking or accepting money from a friend. Your best off not lending money to a friend too unless you plan on losing the friendship.

I don't think Americans are any different than the rest of the world.

[E_Irizarry]

I don't know dude...you best off not asking or accepting money from a friend. Your best off not lending money to a friend too unless you plan on losing the friendship.

I don't think Americans are any different than the rest of the world.

Thanks for your input, but isn't that unfortunate that a lot of people base their friendship on a tit-for-tat merit system?

[Winston]

Yeah man. Your people should stop asking whitey for money. Whenever some black trash asks me for money I put it in its place. I would never be so stupid as to give a black man money.

W: To be honest, I once lent 300 roubles ($10) to a black guy in St. Petersburg that was staying in the same hostel that I had befriended. I thought it was a given that he would pay it back, but he kept stalling and reassuring me that he would pay it back. He was from Africa. But he never did though. That was the only bad experience I had with a black guy.

[gmm567]

yes , it is unforntunate...but that is the way relatsionships are. Don't borrow money from a friend. Don't lend to a friend unless you're willing to never see you money again. Just get used to it. That's the way it is. You'll save yourself a world of hardache if you take that perspective.

You can't have friends if you're a banker. Banker's know this! They are hardnosed about being payed back--that's what it takes to get paid back.


Bankers are not your friends. Don't lend to friends.


Learn from the experience. Thats the only thing you can do.

[Winston]

Yeah man. Your people should stop asking whitey for money. Whenever some black trash asks me for money I put it in its place. I would never be so stupid as to give a black man money.

W: To be honest, I once lent 300 roubles ($10) to a black guy in St. Petersburg that was staying in the same hostel that I had befriended. I thought it was a given that he would pay it back, but he kept stalling and reassuring me that he would pay it back. He was from Africa. But he never did though. That was the only bad experience I had with a black guy.

Sorry Winston. That was foolish. You should never give a black person money - or anything for that matter. They don't deserve anything from us. They only believe that from the news media and Hollywood movies and other propaganda. You will always be played for your money from this race. I'm glad it happened to you if only to teach you a lesson. Never trust the black race.

W: Well prior to that, all my experiences with blacks were good. This guy was from Africa though.

Hey I know a black joke that you might like. It's really bad but funny as hell and had me cracking up for hours. I got it from one of those Julius Alvin book series of tasteless jokes. Here is how it goes: (no offense to anyone black here, this is just humor)

Question: "What's the difference between a black parent and a white parent?"

Answer: (I usually say this with an ebonic accent) "Well when a white parent checks his kid's "marks" he looks at his report card. But when a black parent checks his kids "marks" he rolls up his SLEEVE!"

Hahahahahahaha so bad but funny as hell huh? So racist and taboo too!

[Mr S]

You could probably use an Asian as the white parent and a latino as the black also as they both fit the stereotypes as well. It's funny cause it has a ring of truth to it that liberals aren't willing to admit.

[Master]

To E_Irizarry:


That was an interesting Chit chat you posted. I agree a lot of the rapport from people are always analzing you while they "act" in a way that they cant be analyze. While in the first slip you make they scar you for life. I dont get why that happens? As if they want to be perfect and make you inperfect because they get off on it. Very sadistic behavior. You just cant be you a person with stupidity and flaws. you have to be perfect with manners and all.