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Finally Realizing That It's Not Me....

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Finally Realizing That It's Not Me....

Postby raindreamer333 » Thu Jan 14, 2010 7:42 am

Admittedly, I am not a big fan of everything that Winston Wu says and does, but I do believe there is a lot of truth in his ideas. My story is similar to his. I grew up being told that I was a freak, a weirdo, a homosexual, and a moron. I couldn't understand what I was doing wrong - I was smart, caring, insightful, hardworking, ambitious, and prosocial. I couldn't understand why some people believed in all the drama that came from living an antisocial life.

I was punched, pushed into urinals, and worse. I became convinced there was something wrong with me...I even seriously considered suicide when I was in grade 11. That was in 1999, when the Columbine School Shootings happened, and I identified with Eric Harris and Dylon Klebolt.

It wasn't until high school was done and that I got into the real world that I realized that really, there isn't anything wrong with me. In fact, some people looked up to me.

More importantly, I discovered Filipinas. Well, Filipinas discovered me. What a change it was being told that I was hunk. After years of being humiliated in school, I finally found myself being adored by Filipinas !!! Not just loved - lusted after. I could be sweet, and would get love back. Gone were the days of being punched for being a prosocial person. Western high schools reward mentally ill idiots who while ignoring prosocial go-getters who will actually make a difference in this world.

My unhappiness became a distant memory...now I am loved, cared for, listened to.....Filipina girls respect my character. They respect the fact that I am not just lusting and gambling my life away. I got Filipina girls telling me I am so handsome. In fact, my Filipina girlfriend's friends all send her messags telling her that she is so lucky to have me, and one even asked whether it would be possible to marry my dad (she assumed my dad must be similar to me).

More than anything, I feel vindicated. I know that really, it isn't me. I am normal; it was the people around me who were mentally ill.


One could write an essay over one hundred pages long about the benefits of having a Filipina girlfriend. Most men appeciate the care, the devotion to family, as well as general sexiness of Filipinas as the main reasons for choosing one. Also, many of them have been severely hurt from a previous relationship with a Westernized lady, and are determined to find someone who will never hurt them again.

For me, the best thing about having a Filipina girlfriend is that I am able to show love, care, and affection and be accepted and loved in return. Growing up, I was constantly told that I need to "man up" and "be more aggressive." In Western culture, men are taught to get what they want by fighting for it. You need to stomp on someone else's head so they won't stomp on your head. I was told that I was not aggressive enough, and that I needed to be a jerk to women. Men told me that I needed to treat my girlfriend like she was a dog and make her beg for a treat. I needed to be the prize.

For a while I actually (regretably) believed that crap. But I quickly realized the nonsense for what it was. My heart changed, and then I met Mahal. I know I can be sweet and caring, and not have to worry about her treating me like a doormat. Westernized women often think that being nice means being weak. In Filipina culture, being nice is returned with kindness, and perhaps a bit of sex too.

When I am with Mahal, I feel like I can be myself. I don't have to walk around all "macho" (whatever that is supposed to mean). I can share my weaknesses, and we can laugh at each other in a supporting way. I have finally realized that it really isn't me that is wrong; for so long I had been with mentally ill people who viewed prosocial people as a weakness. You can't blame a Palm Tree for not growing in Alaska.

For the first time in my life, I have felt unconditional love and acceptance being with Mahal.

To be with someone who values me so much brings out the best in me. I want to be the best lover, the best husband, the best father, and the best servant in her church. I don't have to fear that my efforts will be replied with insult. I can serve her, cuddle her, listen to her, and support her, and not fear rejection. She is the best lady, so I want to be the best lover I possibly can be for her.

I wish all men still looking for their Filipina love lots of good luck !!!!
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Postby jamesbond » Thu Jan 14, 2010 8:30 am

Welcome to the forum raindreamer333, you have an interesting story. It seems as if a lot of guys who grew up in the western nations realize American women are emotionally unstable creatures. It's better to find a woman who is emotionally stable and date and marry her rather than an anglobitch. For more info on what an anglobitch is, check out the link below.



http://kshatriya-anglobitch.blogspot.co ... on-or.html
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Postby ladislav » Thu Jan 14, 2010 3:06 pm

All societies are dysfunctional in one way or another and are affected by some kind of social desease. Take an example of North Korea. An anti communist there is abnormal and will be persecuted for being such. To the N. Korean society he is the problem and is not normal. Across the border in S. Korea a communist is abnormal. In Saudi Arabia, a non-Muslim is a freak and being a woman is terrible. If a woman wants to go out alone or to expose her face, she is weird and got a problem. But none of those societies think that it is them that have problems. Because they cannot see themselves, and the way they see it, they are OK and the majority of their people are OK, but it is that person who is weird. In Iran, a man who does not hate America and the West and who watches Western movies is not normal. So, it is all in the culture in which you are in and how it treats you. I would say that being a man in the US now is like being a woman in Ayatollah's Iran. You are persecuted and are asked to act in 'normal' ways- put on the veil, do not talk to men, do not think, etc. Same in a way with a man in the US. But none of those countries see themselves as weird. To them being the way they are is natural.
I am in the Philippines now. My revival began here and I became myself here in 1991. You should move down here.

Growing up, I was constantly told that I need to "man up" and "be more aggressive." In Western culture, men are taught to get what they want by fighting for it. You need to stomp on someone else's head so they won't stomp on your head. I was told that I was not aggressive enough, and that I needed to be a jerk to women. Men told me that I needed to treat my girlfriend like she was a dog and make her beg for a treat. I needed to be the prize.


Yeah, to adapt to the unnatural situation in the US that is slanted in favor of young women. A lot of this is due to the demographic situation in the US where there are more young men than young women and you need to resort to weirdnesses to attract their attention. In RP, there are more women than men and the men are poor, so good men are a prize indeed. Different demographics of different countries as well as economic and religious conditions determine people's behavior. So, you find a place where the situation suits you.

I am now in touch with a native Siberian girl from Russia- you can't get more Asian in appearance than that- and she is now in Manila. She hates it here and she hates the people. So, while this is a good place for guys, it is not such a good place to be a woman. One person's meat is another person's poison. But there was once another Siberian girl who ended up in the USA. She became a model in New York, had a handsome all American boyfriend and a good life. It goes to show how the same place can be good for one kind and ugly for another.
Last edited by ladislav on Fri Jan 15, 2010 12:55 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Grunt » Thu Jan 14, 2010 9:48 pm

I will agree with ladislav to the point that each culture has its particular perspective, but America has a few unique problems above and beyond the normal dysfunction we see elsewhere.

In America the kids shoving other kids into urinals are the sons of police officers or school administrators. These same kids also sell drugs to the kids in the school, everyone KNOWS it, but they never get caught.

Keep in mind that the Columbine shooters were basically manipulated into position by the son of an FBI agent, one Scott Fuselier. This son of an FBI agent actually did a video walk-through of the Columbine shooting before it ever happened. Fuselier also provided guns and explosives to the Columbine shooters. Why was he never charged?

Kids learn early that there are those among them that can do or say whatever they want, and they never get in trouble. But if any kid not in this "protected" group so much as strays an inch out of line, the whole system comes crashing down on his head. Trust me, I know this from first hand experience! :D

As we get into our 20's we see those scumbag kids that sold us drugs in high school and ratted out some of our freinds are now...you guessed it...COPS!

So, unlike other nations where idiots tend to drop out of the gene pool due to their own stupidity, America actually *rewards* backstabbing scumbag idiots. And where America signs its own death warrant is, the entire American persona is no longer trying to achieve your own hopes and dreams, but in tripping up others around you in an effort to make sure they never reach their hopes and dreams.

So the rest of the world has a percentage, maybe 20%, of people that make life less enjoyable. But America has legions, armies, massive brigades (75% of the overall population) of snivelling little trolls that know they will never do anything of substance in life. So these trolls spend every waking moment trying to screw their fellow Americans any and every chance they get.

This makes life in America virtually impossible to enjoy in any real way, because when you are swimming in a sea of nitwits, life gets really tedious. I keep to myself, but because I married a hot young Ukrainian girl, ever neighbour on my block acts like a complete douchebag. Every other female on the block is a bloated pig faced hog, and all the men scowl at me. But they never bother to ask "Hey, good for you, can you give me any advice on women?".

And that is why America is doomed.
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Postby momopi » Thu Jan 14, 2010 11:15 pm

My instructor at the culinary school used to work in Beirut when he was young. It was his first adventure outside of Europe (he is from Burgundy) and he had the time of his life. He loved Lebanon and thought it was a far better and more exciting place to live than Paris.

Unfortunately, after the civil war broke out, he found himself in the middle of no-man's land and quickly left. He found employement with the Shah of Iran and was very happy there, until the Shah was overthrown in another revolution and he had to run away.

30 years later, the places where he enjoyed in his youth are stilll a mess, and all he could do is reminance the days gone by and teach me how to make baba ghanoush "the right way, how they did it in Lebanon".

If you live in a country where you didn't have to worry about revolutions, war, necessities, etc., and have the spare time to complain about the lack of better social life, you're already in a better position than many others. As an American, you can easily work and save the funds necessary for going to PH (and other countries) without VISA issues. People from many other countries cannot afford to do the same and have to work as domestic servants or cross the border as an illegal immigrant.

The world is a big place, and as an US citizen, we're in a better position to afford traveling abroad and entering foreign countries legally. It's a real shame that many Americans don't apperciate how lucky we are and utilize those opportunities to see the world. Sometimes, you only get to see a place at its best for a very short period of time, before it's gone. Learn to apperciate those opportunities, because they might not be there again in your life time.

For my teacher, at least he has those memories to look back upon, as he try to explain why tahini is better than Asian sesame paste for baba ghanoush.
Last edited by momopi on Fri Jan 15, 2010 7:21 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Adama » Fri Jan 15, 2010 12:01 am

momopi wrote:My instructor at the culinary school used to work in Beirut when he was young. It was his first adventure outside of Europe (he is from Burgundy) and he had the time of his life. He loved Lebanon and thought it was a far better and more exciting place to live than Paris.

Unfortunately, after the civil war broke out, he found himself in the middle of no-man's land and quickly left. He found employement with the Shah of Iran and was very happy there, until the Shah was overthrown in another revolution and he had to run away.

30 years later, the places where he enjoyed in his youth are stilll a mess, and all he could do is reminance the days gone by and teach me how to make baba ghanoush "the right way, how they did it in Lebanon".

If you live in a country where you didn't have to worry about revolutions, war, necessities, etc., and have the spare time to complain about the lack of better social life, you're already in a better position than many others. As an American, you can easily work and save the funds necessary for going to PH without VISA issues. People from many other countries cannot afford to do the same and have to work as domestic servants or cross the border as an illegal immigrant.

The world is a big place, and as an US citizen, we're in a better position to afford travel abroad and entering foreign countries legally. It's a real shame that many Americans don't apperciate how lucky we are and utilize those opportunities to see the world. Sometimes, you only get to see a place at its best for a very short period of time, before it's gone. Learn to apperciate those opportunities, because they might not be there again in your life time.

For my teacher, at least he has those memories to look back upon, as he try to explain why tahini is better than Asian sesame paste for baba ghanoush.


Well I would have agreed in 1995 or so. Slowly every route to the upper middle class has been cut off, either through outsourcing, H1B visas, or illegal immigration. Also malpractice suits, torts. Last but not least, the Second Great Depression.
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Postby ladislav » Fri Jan 15, 2010 1:19 am

I did not grow up in the US so I would not know. Actually from 4-14 I lived in central Russia and the kids there were cool. None of that stuff you described. What you described then is simply perverse. No camaraderie of any kind. Based on all the stuff you mentioned above the priority is online income to free you from the shackles of a 9-5 job in the USA. You do not even need a whole lot of money to live where you want. A US passport provides you with visa free entry to most world countries, and ESL jobs in the Middle East allow you to save pretty good money. Anyone with a BA/BS can take a DELTA/CELTA certificate and then move out. For example, with a Ukrainian wife, why not move back to Ukraine? If you absolutely determine that you can make money online, you are free. And while it is hard to become an upper middle class person in the US, in many countries you are already that if you have $1000-2000 a month coming in. The trick is to think very hard about how you can make it happen.
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Postby Grunt » Fri Jan 15, 2010 4:52 am

I am the type of person that needs to accomplish something. I do have a military pension, and its not bad at $3700 tax free per month. The problem is, when I am in Ukraine I get alot of unwanted attention from Ukrainian guys. Its not too bad, but that low level of hard stares and general hostility that over time gets on my nerves.

Also, who is to say the US dollar does not fall over dead like the Soviet Ruble? Then I would be stuck in Ukraine with no job, no skills, and 45 years old and disabled from the war?

I would like to try to start a business in Canada or Europe, but I simply dont have the money to start one. I am currently considering a move to New Hampshire or Vermont as both states are very very close to secession from the Union. Once they do that, its going to be an economic boom and I want to be there to see it happen.

I guess time will tell. All I know is, America is screwed.
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Postby ladislav » Fri Jan 15, 2010 1:05 pm

Where in Ukraine are you? Some rustbelt hicktowns? Why not go to Yalta? There are cosmopolitan places there where you won't attract stares. 3700 a month tax free? You are a king already.
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Postby Grunt » Fri Jan 15, 2010 4:40 pm

My wife is from Kherson, yes, its the rust belt. We currently live in Virginia.
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Postby ladislav » Fri Jan 15, 2010 5:27 pm

Place matters. Kherson is hard country- Hicksville. And you went to VA after that? From one provincial sticks-type area and into another. If you took a gal from Yalta or Odessa to Los Angeles, no one would even give you a second look in either place.
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Postby Grunt » Fri Jan 15, 2010 9:21 pm

Oh it gets worse, we lived in Montana for a few years. It was cheap but the local females were driven into blind rage at how hot my wife is, and the guys in Montana were every bit as idiotic and goofy as the females. No guy in Montana once asked me about how I got my wife or how they could get one too. They could never see past their own stupidity to form the thought.

My wife has citizenship now and we will be 100% out of debt by the end of 2010. Then its off to New Hampshire or Vermont and we will try our best to get into Montrea Canada at that point. I have a few pending claims and a lawsuit against the department of veterans affairs that could net me $100,000 within the next 2 years.

Bringing a foreign wife to America has shown me the true nature of Americans as a whole. Americans are fully fascist scum, they know little more than backstabbing and screwing people over, and the "men" in America have become very much like females. Never being honest, always trying to trip people up, and gossip is their only true skill.

Id give my left nut for a 5 year visa to France at this point.
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Postby ladislav » Sat Jan 16, 2010 3:35 am

Grunt wrote:Oh it gets worse, we lived in Montana for a few years. It was cheap but the local females were driven into blind rage at how hot my wife is, and the guys in Montana were every bit as idiotic and goofy as the females. No guy in Montana once asked me about how I got my wife or how they could get one too. They could never see past their own stupidity to form the thought.

My wife has citizenship now and we will be 100% out of debt by the end of 2010. Then its off to New Hampshire or Vermont and we will try our best to get into Montrea Canada at that point. I have a few pending claims and a lawsuit against the department of veterans affairs that could net me $100,000 within the next 2 years.

Bringing a foreign wife to America has shown me the true nature of Americans as a whole. Americans are fully fascist scum, they know little more than backstabbing and screwing people over, and the "men" in America have become very much like females. Never being honest, always trying to trip people up, and gossip is their only true skill.

Id give my left nut for a 5 year visa to France at this point.


And Montana is supposed to be one of the friendliest places in the USA with really honest country folks. Your wife must have felt very lonely there.

I agree about the nature of men in the US. I was with US military guys in Saudi Arabia. Constant gossip and no camaraderie. The only guys that were decent were black guys. The white guys would f*ck each other over all the time. The ones that stuck up for me and protected me were Southern black guys. These were friendly and they believed in friendship and all. Not all, but most were decent.

One Russian girl I knew said one thing about the US- the people constantly rat each other out.

Why is there always a complaint about immigrants not wanting to 'become' Americans? Why even bother? Who wants to become part of the mainstream?
Why do you guys not live in LA?
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Postby Hero » Sat Jan 16, 2010 4:20 pm

ladislav wrote: You do not even need a whole lot of money to live where you want. A US passport provides you with visa free entry to most world countries, and ESL jobs in the Middle East allow you to save pretty good money. Anyone with a BA/BS can take a DELTA/CELTA certificate and then move out. For example, with a Ukrainian wife, why not move back to Ukraine? If you absolutely determine that you can make money online, you are free. And while it is hard to become an upper middle class person in the US, in many countries you are already that if you have $1000-2000 a month coming in. The trick is to think very hard about how you can make it happen.


Hey Ladislav, somebody wrote on another thread that you can't expat with credit card debt and/or student loans. Is this true?
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Postby Hero » Sat Jan 16, 2010 4:30 pm

Hey Raindreamer, I know exactly what you mean about those Filipinas lusting after you. My first Filipina GF made out with me and let me feel her up (and down!) on our second date, gave me a BJ on the third date, wanted to sleep with me by the fifth date, and invited me to move in with her after we'd been dating for 3 months. She provided me with sex and BJ's whenever I wanted them. And this was an Americanized Filipina who'd been living in the U.S. for 20 years! Naturally, this experience made me decide to visit the Philippines to see if I could meet more women like this. I wasn't disappointed. I could not believe that so many 20-something girls who looked like models and movie stars were grabbing me and sucking the lips right off my face (I was 38 at the time). Dreams can come true.
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