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For Asian Americans to discuss Asian American issues and topics.
2 posts • Page 1 of 1
When you dated all those Taiwanese females, what about you attracted them to you?
Do they compliment you on your intelligence? Your character? Your height? Your professional career? Business sense?
When they compliment you, or tell you what they like about you, what do they say?
From my impression, they care most about a guy's ability to be stable in character and income. Is that true?
What about you impresses them? Have you been able to pin it down?
Or is it too subjective to describe?
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"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
OK -- my brain was still scrambled from EDC, so have to come back and edit this a bit
On first meeting/introduction, the girl will usually not compliment you directly, or do so politely in small talk. Over-complimenting or flattering someone will make you look fake. The girl will be less reserved with her comments to her friends, and in my case they usually say "he's tall!". If you're with younger girls at a night club, they'd be less reserved and comment to you directly.
Like elsewhere first impressions are important, so dress to impress and don't blab too much unless if you have the charisma . Guys who are all talk and no action are lame and don't impress women. Smart people are dime and dozen, nobody is impressed with your IQ or knowledge of banana slug's mating habits. You do not want to be a "little smarts" (Shao Tsun Meng) in Taiwan, it's about as bad as a jack of all trades and master of none. A job simply means you're on someone's expense column. Women in TW are more impressed if you own you own successful business, they like guys with $ but dislike guys who brag about $. If the women is older and looking for a meal ticket, then she'd give more consideration to your professional career status.
In the US, the girls might decide if she'd ever sleep with you within the first 10-20 seconds. In TW the girls have lower expectations and are more likely to give you a second chance. If you're wearing something that she doesn't like, and she comments "you dress too formally", listen to her and wear something casual on the next meeting. Your ability to attract and create positive kimochi (気持ち) will determine if you can turn it into a date.
Since I'm older and from Los Angeles, the girls I went out with are in the marrying age. The girls would sometimes communicate non-verbally through her actions, such as taking you to NY Bagels restaurant. That's a hint to say that she's sophisticated enough to know bagels (uncommon in TW at the time) and might be open to American food and, possibly American lifestyle (hint hint). If you're dumb enough to comment "OMG this menu says they import frozen bagels from America, why would they do that to this cheap ass food", don't expect a good response. Many women in TW don't want to ditch their family and friends to move abroad -- I learned that lesson the hard way.
If a girl likes you, she'll find reasons to say why she likes you. If she is not attracted to you, then she'd find reasons to state why she doesn't want to date you. It doesn't matter if the reasons to like or dislike is the same, the only difference being the guy. Taiwan is full of hard-working, career-oriented men. There's nothing special about yet another guy who's focused on his work/career.