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Cool story bro! How old are you and your girl? It would be nice to know.
Anyway, I hope you can return to China real soon. Make it your mission to get an English teaching certificate when you return home, it's your best way of coming here for the long term.
My last gf was into the heavy kissing thing, I think it kinda means you're valuable to her, yeah Western guys are a definite trophy asset here.
Chinese women aren't that complicated really though, they want money, a baby (or two babies) and security for their parents.
On the downside, they can be terribly clingy. I made that mistake but in truth I need to meet a lot more girls before I can know that I can stay with one forever.
And to all the guys who are thinking about coming here... Well today I dated a 10. Yes, an actual 10. Maybe not in looks, but in her presentation and all-round sex appeal, yeah, she was a 10. If a girl is that hot, then you'll not be able to keep your hands off of her.
On the downside, it is HARD to live in China, not least because the Chinese are keen on keeping out the riff-raff. To come here you'll need to study or teach English, unless you have your own business or work for a good company who will send you here. And both of those options involve hard work as well!
My Chinese teachers are incredibly good. I'd expect the Western guys living the dream teaching English and living here work just as hard as my Chinese teachers do. It's hard work to hold a class's attention for 80 minutes.
Studying is also pretty hard work - learning Mandarin, yeah that's a crazy thing to attempt.
But the rewards for coming here are limitless. I saw some amazing stuff today. And I met a spectacular woman.
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I'm 27, in may I'll be 28.
She had a birthday not too long ago and is 20 years old.
I actually love the fact that my girl is clingy, but I understand if you don't, not all guys like that.
I really can tell a little bit of a maturity gap, or maybe it's culture, not quite sure, but it isn't negative, she's just really playful sometimes.
Nothing you've said here sounds bad!
Age difference is OK - it's the same as my last gf's brother and his gf (now wife).
Chinese girls under 30 can be playful at times. Chinese women generally are quite clingy as well - a man is a valuable asset here, especially a rich one!
Just bear in mind that it's usually the older girls who go for foreigners. Make sure her parents aren't holding out for a Chinese husband for her. However, if she has brothers (especially older brothers) then they're often less bothered about who their daughter marries.
My girl friend called in sick to her university so she could not only see me off at the airport *almost didn't make the flight* but so she could spend the night with me at a hostel that she paid for...
I almost fell to my carnal impulses, but no orgasms were made while staying with her in the hostel, a lot of making out, she wasn't fully clothed *coff* but in the end i said i can't, she could fully understand and then one of the most romantic things a girl has ever said to me came out of her "your worth to be loved" she realized that I was in it for her, not just to get sex, she even once said, "but shouldn't you wait" when she thought I was going to break my virginity rule. That not only made me look better in her eyes realizing I'm not like the other guys, she defended my honors and morals even when she obviously wish I kept it in my pants.
She told me she loved me that night, we hardly slept, I think I slept 1 hour, and woke up to her grabbing me and kissed me like my mouth was the only way she could breathe.
While at the airport we were in a rush, she was depressed for sure that I was leaving, this girl is a good find, I was fast to talk serous as I had no time to ease in to it, I said "if you want me to come back, what about your plans, you were going to go study in france for 2 years, I wouldn't be able to go with you, I don't fit in to your plans" and she responded "my plans can change" I said "I believe love is a choice after you get passed all the emotions at the end of the day, passed all the good and bad times, it's a choice to love someone, if i come back and make the choice to love you, will you only be mine and always try to stay pretty for me" she said "yes, of course I will wait for you, yes I can" every time she started to see I was serous she got more excited I told her "when i say something I mean it, so I choose to love you" so then we made out and I said "i love you" she was excited to hear me say that, but I can tell she's scared, she knows I'm not like the other guys, I will still save for 3 to 5 months, but it will be to go back to china, I'll have a nice chunk saved up, if it works out with this girl, I'll laugh in my grave, if they don't, I'll head to japan just as I had planned.
I can't believe that happened in 3/4 days, but the way she treats me...the things she says to me... she randomly dances for me, she sings to me...she makes me feel like a valuable man, instead of always working for a SCRAP of even acknowledgment that I even exist.
This post is rushed, as I'm getting everything situated here at home.
After getting off the plain I RIGHT AWAY knew the pain of being back...
Incredible magnum. I'm very happy for you. I know it's out there, but it's good to be reminded. Tons of other sad lonely men in U.S.A. never think outside their hometown and settle for Ameriskanks if they have any relationship prospects at all. Happier Abroad indeed.
Yeah, I think eurobrat is right with his tough love. I ruined things with my first Chinese gf because I was too polite and reserved.
There are a lot of very beautiful girls here, and your Chinese gf really needs to know that you're totally into her.
Well I learned from my mistakes, and with Miss Xiang who I met at the weekend I held her hand on the first date. I'm having to be as alpha as possible, but it seems to be working.
I heard a good saying - if she's easy, she won't be special, and if she's special, she won't be easy.
How do you know she's special? Well I wanted to rip her clothes off and make love to her there and then.
I've dated some great ladies before, but when Miss Xiang touches me it makes my hair stand on end.
Anyway, come back here and bag yourself a 10! I watched a 100 or so Chinese students arrive for class this morning. About 90% were girls, and there were a few 10's amongst them.
hey, if she passes the kiss test, it's fine.
I met a lot of girls that didn't pass that test...
The test being, if they're too ugly for me to ever kiss they arn't relationship material.
Besides, trust me, I showed alpha.
What's more alpha than a man who can set down rules on If or if not a relationship will happen, and who he him self isn't easy, I bet you no other man has ever NOT banged her when she offered.
And hey, When I go back don't think for a second if the relationship fails I won't be looking for another, but I wont operate under the impression it's doomed from the start, I didn't get this far by thinking that way Muahaha.
No question she wanted him to lead the way and plough the field.
Because she indeed had selected him as her man.
He could easily have ploughed ahead, and most of us a little more experienced would have done just that.
But if he had, he would have felt obligated. Especially if she was sweet, and lovable, and he was her first.
Now, instead, he is free. Dry dick, but a free dick.
Good to know you can get it. Good. So KNOW you can get what you want. Know it, don't prove it, at least not as an exercise to impress peers, chums, acquaintances. f***ing to impress guys is just a little gay. Butch for sure, but gay.
And decide what - WHO - you want, before you get it. You choose the p***y, don't let the p***y choose you.
Damn, I hate you magnum! I was hoping for a better HA ending to this story, or NO ending. I TOLD you not to go back!! Still, meeting that girl at the last minute sounds TOO awesome. Reminds me of the early days starting off with my wife...
I know you are back in hell now, and can't change that, but do your plan GET BACK TO HER.
This is still one of the best threads on here....
Any update to Magnum's story?
Returning home is agonising and I've never really managed to progress a relationship when I've been on the other side of the world to my girl.
There are plenty of opportunities for foreigners here - if you're old and smart you can do business or teach English. Younger foreigners can do all kinds of jobs like modelling/entertaining.
I don't have any regrets about quitting my cubicle slave job. I miss the money but it's just been so exciting and interesting living here. I mean I had an earthquake day, a day with 4 thunderstorms as well as seeing all kinds of weird goings on downtown.
Plus this city is packed with beautiful women and just going to the supermarket is a great experience.
I agree with xiongmao. Like him, I work in IT and it is really annoying that I have go to a job where I have limited vacation and because my job requires support 24 hours/ 7days a week, I have to work with my group when to take some holidays and when I can stay home. I see if there is a way to work and earn decent money I will it is just most countries where you can find a great girl plus nice friends has limited jobs where you can make a decent amount of money.
In Mexico (I know this is about China), I have a girlfriend but trying to find a job that can pay at least 24,000 pesos ($2k) is difficult since I make 3 times that back in the US. I think in Magnum you can look for work modelling or teaching English. You can use the English teaching job for a valid work permit and you can do small work like modelling and/or private lessons to have a decent income.
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