Join John Adams, world renowned Intl Matchmaker, Monday nights 8:30 EST for Live Webcasts!
And check out Five Reasons why you should attend a FREE AFA Seminar! See locations and dates here.



View Active Topics       View Your Posts       Latest 100 Topics       FAQ Topics       Switch to Mobile


I went to live in China... ask me anything!

Post your trip reports, travel experiences, and updates abroad. Or your expat story if you already live overseas. Note: To post photos and images, insert the image URL between the tags [img]and[/img] after uploading them to a third party site.

Moderators: jamesbond, fschmidt

Postby magnum » Tue Feb 26, 2013 2:38 pm

your exciting me with all this information, its sounding more and more like a better deal than japan, my problem is when I set out to do something I DO it.....missing japan this trip is unacceptable and makes me want it more, however......The objective was to find a woman and a new country to live in, even though I was supposed to experience both of them.


The classes you mentioned... I'm actually vary interested in learning, I've never had a traditional class room experience of any kind, learning chinese and seeing as I love athletics kung fu would be a dream.


So you've only been going for so long, but let me ask you this, lets say in 5 months I come down and go to the same exact college, you can't read the future, so you tell me in your opinion, what are my chances with girls, break it down for me, each race, if you could best guess it for me.


it's exciting what your telling me, because it gives me a huge opportunity to do something I've never to do, have a college experience and learn something useful and substantial, I've literally never been to a normal school more than 2 days, I don't reveal that easily, but in this case its to get my point across.

Set on getting out of the country already in my heart and mind, I'll work 2 jobs if I have to, but everything your telling me....I see my self killing 3 birds with 1 stone, that's how fantastic it could be, problem is, if I hit my goal for 5k USD that's only about 32k RMB, so that's 15k rmb left over, not too bad, but without a job I'd see that going fast.

Sorry for the long post, but you got me excited now.
magnum
Junior Poster
 
Posts: 555
Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2011 9:43 pm





Postby Jester » Tue Feb 26, 2013 3:46 pm

odbo wrote:I need to go to China and start cock-blocking like crazy, preventing scumbags from the west from perverting Chinese women. Most of the males on this forum are pathetic and make me sick to my stomach, especially when I realize they are 30-60 years old and have the thought patterns of some douchebags in high school. Real men are an endangered species.

http://www.chinasmack.com/2013/stories/ ... n-men.html
The laowai who come to fool around in China can all be described with one word, “shrewdâ€￾. But the laowai who come to China, some are losers, which is to say they have no job, no house, not even a car, or even in debt in their own countries.

http://www.chinasmack.com/2013/stories/ ... n-men.html
http://www.chinasmack.com/2013/stories/ ... marry.html
http://www.chinasmack.com/2010/stories/ ... gners.html


Fascinating to read interracial relations from the other side's perspective. Seemed very truthful. I guess the author was a girl?

Funny that her initial criticism was Chinese girls should be MORE materialistic, and demand gifts and courtship.

But I can see the sense of the initially sober Chinese approach to relationships.

The sober up-front assessment of a mate used to be performed by parents.

I think noble famiies of old would have been amused greatly by the idea that their daughter should be allowed to run off with a minstrel, just because she "liked him".

Nevertheless, in an age with parents all AWOL, I guess a young noble needs a little minstrelship.

What really stung was parts 2 and 3, where she discussed how Western men evaluate long-term commitment based on a girl's finances and the image she projects. I know a guy like this. I thought he was just a weird exception. Guess not.
Last edited by Jester on Tue Feb 26, 2013 6:50 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Jester
Elite Upper Class Poster
 
Posts: 7874
Joined: Tue Jan 20, 2009 9:10 am
Location: Chiang Mai Thailand

Postby Intolerant » Tue Feb 26, 2013 4:04 pm

I think these days, families in China are going back to the old ways by arranging marriages, which are considered to be more stable and results in long-lasting relationships compared to 'love marriages' that often end in divorce. Believe me, my parents have told me: "If you can't find a girlfriend, we'll find you a wife.", a prospect that I don't mind, certainly given how American women are bitches though Chinese women are like that as well.

Personally, I think Japan and Korea are pretty bad if you want women, they're very Westernized and are just as bitches as the average American woman.
Intolerant
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 123
Joined: Sat Feb 23, 2013 7:51 pm

Postby magnum » Tue Feb 26, 2013 4:10 pm

eh...the problem with "arranged" anything nowdays is....people use it as a excuse to hook you up "match" you up with the most ugly lowest most desperate thing that exists within any 20 miles of your location, my personal experience anyway.

Why is it you never see attracted well rounded people being "matched"

My only complaint with that process, sure they'll find you a nice girl, I'm sure she'll even stay by your side, because no one wants to be by her side in the first place most likely.

Sorry for the mini-rant but I've had bad experience with people "helping" me out.
magnum
Junior Poster
 
Posts: 555
Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2011 9:43 pm

Postby Jester » Tue Feb 26, 2013 6:56 pm

magnum wrote:eh...the problem with "arranged" anything nowdays is....people use it as a excuse to hook you up "match" you up with the most ugly lowest most desperate thing that exists within any 20 miles of your location, my personal experience anyway.

Why is it you never see attracted well rounded people being "matched"

My only complaint with that process, sure they'll find you a nice girl, I'm sure she'll even stay by your side, because no one wants to be by her side in the first place most likely.

Sorry for the mini-rant but I've had bad experience with people "helping" me out.


Haha I know exactly what you mean. I never let older women hook me up anymore, or my male friends either. Yeccch.

Best bet for arranging is if you meet a guy who has a very hot wife or fiancee, of the same ethnicity you desire. This worked for me well once. (They met me, then the wife invited her best friend to join us at the party..)
Jester
Elite Upper Class Poster
 
Posts: 7874
Joined: Tue Jan 20, 2009 9:10 am
Location: Chiang Mai Thailand

Re: I went to live in China... ask me anything!

Postby XJBrave » Tue Feb 26, 2013 7:05 pm

xiongmao wrote:OK for those of you who are new here, here's a quick recap.

I started looking for a Chinese wife back in 2009. I was 37 at the time, had a good career, but started to feel lonely.... and that feeling that a woman was what was missing from my life.

Why Chinese? Because they were the girls I thought were hottest on the ForeignLadies.com mail order bride themed site.

Why didn't I look for love earlier in life? I've always liked foreign ladies, but it just never occurred to me that Asian women would be interested in younger guys like me. And also my Uncle was a long time visitor of Thai ladies, but Thai ladies don't rock my boat like Chinese ladies do.

OK so my first visit to China confirmed that while the Internet (and certain dating sites) can lie, China really is full of absolutely beautiful women.

I've dated a succession of Chinese (and a couple of Japanese) women but I've come to the conclusion that I'm just too darned picky for the dating site > chat to women > go to Asia for a fortnight to meet a woman/women thing to work. It can work, but marriage is just too big a step in my opinion.

It needs careful thought.

So I quit my well paid job, sold most of my possessions and here I am, in Guangzhou, China.

Why Guangzhou?

My first visit to China was to Wuhan in Hubei Province. Geographically it's in the middle of the country. It's quite a boring city, with not much for a Westerner to do. The ladies are beautiful, but you might go out of your mind if you spent any length of time there.

So for my 2nd visit to China I chose Guangzhou. It's about 100 miles up the Pearl River from Hong Kong.

I really fell in love with Guangzhou (or Gz as the locals call it) as soon as I got on the metro that whisked me right into the centre and I could walk to my hotel. The hotel has Pizza Hut, McDonalds and a whole load of Asian restaurants nearby.

Gz is also a good place to take a date - there are lots of tourist sites. And there's a couple of great shopping streets which will allow you to check if your date's a shopaholic!

The weather is also good here, although it's almost always stupendously hot and humid. I'd rather have that than the biting cold I witnessed in Shanghai last January!

OK so China is harder to get a visa for nowadays and if you want to find a Chinese wife I recommend you stay for a year. You've got 3 main options: teach English, work as an expat or study.

Teaching English is good if you don't have much cash savings. The little girl on the plane next to me was learning English from a book - it's a massive industry here. For a better chance of a job head for medium sized cities like Changsha.

Expat jobs are available but you'll need some kind of expert status. Younger guys can try and land an internship though. Remember that China has no shortage of unskilled labour and you'll not get a work visa if a Chinaman can do your work.

Finally Chinese universities offer reasonably priced education and options include MBA's or just learning Mandarin. I've chosen the Mandarin option - it does cost around $2600 a year but students here get bargain basement health insurance, food and accommodation.

So here I am, and assuming my visa gets processed OK, I'll be here until early July. Will Winston visit? Who knows :-P

Anyway, ask me anything about China, Chinese women, and if you want to meet up here, then I'll be happy to show you around.

I'll post more updates as they happen. Sorry no photos tonight as it's really cloudy and not ideal conditions for photography.


Of all the women in China. I believe the southern women worship westerners the most. Especially in GZ. Is this true Louzhu?
I only know one god, and that is the god of justice Allah
XJBrave
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 23
Joined: Tue Feb 26, 2013 8:04 am

Postby Intolerant » Tue Feb 26, 2013 7:47 pm

magnum wrote:eh...the problem with "arranged" anything nowdays is....people use it as a excuse to hook you up "match" you up with the most ugly lowest most desperate thing that exists within any 20 miles of your location, my personal experience anyway.

Why is it you never see attracted well rounded people being "matched"

My only complaint with that process, sure they'll find you a nice girl, I'm sure she'll even stay by your side, because no one wants to be by her side in the first place most likely.

Sorry for the mini-rant but I've had bad experience with people "helping" me out.


That's only in amurrica, to be honest. I'm Asian and people tend to arrange their marriages quite a bit.
Intolerant
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 123
Joined: Sat Feb 23, 2013 7:51 pm

Postby magnum » Wed Feb 27, 2013 12:52 am

I can't complain, I had 3 old ladies while I was here trying to get me to hang out with a girl each, the problem was, 2 canceled saying they don't know or don't want to speak english, and the 3erd was cute, hung out with her, but it didn't go anywhere and she was 25 and a workaholic with no time, or no time for me anyway.


hardly a arranged marriage, but I guess my point is I still don't see it working out well.

Why can't this be the the old west, I'd just find a chines/japanese immigrant , and treat her like a goddess.


If only I had a time machine...
magnum
Junior Poster
 
Posts: 555
Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2011 9:43 pm

Postby xiongmao » Wed Feb 27, 2013 11:22 am

Well my life in the UK was boring, and now every day is packed with interesting occurrences.

I met my third Chinese teacher today. I have 10 classes a week from 3 different teachers - it helps to get a different perspective on things. All the teachers speak English, but they tend not to use it unless absolutely necessary.

I now have a Middle-Eastern friend - like many here he has come to Gz to seek his fortune. I wish I had come here when I was his age (late 20's).

Anyway, we had an interesting restaurant meal at an Italian restaurant. The food wasn't that bad considering how difficult it is to get good cheese here.

A class mate joined us. He's from a less well known "stan" and speaks little English. We managed to communicate with a combination of bad Arabic and bad Chinese.

I put my Middle Eastern friend on the bus into town. His spoken Chinese is better than mine, but I can read better, which is useful when it comes to the bus timetables.

On the way back to the hotel I met another English teacher, and we chatted for a bit. He's right - foreigners are drawn to Guangzhou. There's something about the place that makes you fall in love with it.

Oh, and he had a Chinese girlfriend, and a really attractive one at that.

There were so many pretty girls walking around today, it defied belief.
In February 2013 I quit my boring job and now I'm Happier Abroad...
Do YOU want to date beautiful foreign women? Find out which country's women are best for you, and which dating site to look for them on!
Plus, if you like Asian girls, then check out my free Asian dating site.
xiongmao
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 2584
Joined: Wed Mar 09, 2011 5:09 pm
Location: London

Postby magnum » Wed Feb 27, 2013 11:39 am

here are a few questions for you.


How many hours would your student visa allow you to work, and would it be worth it to do so, how long will it allow you to stay?


How much free time do you have, and is it enough to have a relationship, and in that case, would the girls even be interested in a relationship with all the studying they would be doing, here, at least the chinese girls seem so focused on study or work, that a boy friend seems almost imposable to some these women.
magnum
Junior Poster
 
Posts: 555
Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2011 9:43 pm

Postby xiongmao » Thu Feb 28, 2013 4:05 am

Don't count on working on a student visa. If you need to work, get a working visa. These are hard to get unless you come here to teach English, or you're an expert at something that Chinese people aren't.

You can stay here on a student visa forever, but you'll need to be enrolled in a University and study something. Generally you enroll per semester (Sept-Feb, Feb-June). For study Chinese is the logical choice - there are 8 levels of competency in my University, so moving up the classes will keep me busy for a few years. I'm also taking a communication course and they also run courses in paper cutting, Cantonese, kung-fu and other Chinese related cultural activities.

A few Universities also offer English taught courses. I'd love to do an MA in international business or something.

My classes are mornings or afternoons M-F and I have two lessons of 1hr20mins a day. There's a 20 min break between the lessons. So I have plenty of time. Bear in mind most ladies work during the day here, but evenings are mostly free as are weekends and public holidays (of which there are lots).
In February 2013 I quit my boring job and now I'm Happier Abroad...
Do YOU want to date beautiful foreign women? Find out which country's women are best for you, and which dating site to look for them on!
Plus, if you like Asian girls, then check out my free Asian dating site.
xiongmao
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 2584
Joined: Wed Mar 09, 2011 5:09 pm
Location: London

Postby magnum » Thu Feb 28, 2013 1:29 pm

I project I'd only have 17k RMB after paying for the classes, thats a vary thrifty budget, I'd have to do online english teaching or something, otherwise i'd find my self in big trouble fast.


Learning chinese, kung fu, and even taking a dance class all sound awesome to me.

I'll have to seriously think about this, depending on if I go to japan I might have to delay it, we'll see, funny how you go from no options to more options than you've ever had in your life, and all it takes is a air plain ticket to unveil the world to you.
magnum
Junior Poster
 
Posts: 555
Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2011 9:43 pm

Postby xiongmao » Fri Mar 01, 2013 5:00 am

Yeah, it's supposed to be cheap here, but I keep getting hit with extras, especially as far as getting the residency visa. Like the medical is 550RMB, insurance 600, etc, etc, etc.

Also food here is really cheap, but unless you love chicken feet, offal or tree bark then you'll need to go to the more expensive restaurants that do less alien dishes.

Really you need to stockpile cash for a year or two, have a thrifty life back home, then come here with a warchest of cash.

There are other options though. There's a Colombian girl in my class... my god I need to go to Colombia!
In February 2013 I quit my boring job and now I'm Happier Abroad...
Do YOU want to date beautiful foreign women? Find out which country's women are best for you, and which dating site to look for them on!
Plus, if you like Asian girls, then check out my free Asian dating site.
xiongmao
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 2584
Joined: Wed Mar 09, 2011 5:09 pm
Location: London

Postby xiongmao » Fri Mar 01, 2013 1:42 pm

OK I got my student apartment today. I must post some photos.

1200RMB a month, plus extras (lift, garbage disposal, internet, water, electricity).

It's really basic. I have a couple of beds, a couple of tables, a stool, and that's it.

I've got a big room, a balcony, a small room, a kitchen and a wet room with a Chinese WC and a shower hose.

Well I'll try living like a local for a while, but quite honestly by the time I've bought my bedding and stuff for washing I may as well have just tried to find a hotel with a good rate for long stays.

I can't fault the location though - just 5 minutes to my classroom. Also they have a secure entry system and a CCTV system which is useful for round here.

I guess I will only really use the place for sleeping - I'll eat out all the time and go out and about meeting as many people as I can.

One good thing - it's cheaper than the on-campus accommodation!

What else? Well it rained today and the rainy season is approaching apparently. I asked my friend how much rain. Apparently it's just small rain, but it's a real challenge to dry your clothes. Also I'm a little worried about my feet going mouldy! I need some tips for living in the tropics.

The girls are getting ever more beautiful here. There are some exquisitely beautiful creatures here. While I haven't talked to any, at least I can watch them going about their daily lives :)

Oh, and I've got a new lead on Chinese Love Links. This one is a 10, but she lives in Shenzhen. I hope next week's classes cover buying train tickets.
In February 2013 I quit my boring job and now I'm Happier Abroad...
Do YOU want to date beautiful foreign women? Find out which country's women are best for you, and which dating site to look for them on!
Plus, if you like Asian girls, then check out my free Asian dating site.
xiongmao
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 2584
Joined: Wed Mar 09, 2011 5:09 pm
Location: London

Postby magnum » Sat Mar 02, 2013 3:04 am

I thought you said 12'000 rmb, I was about to give up the idea of china!


That's a vary nice deal, 1200 with all the perks.

here in shenyang, not counting the cost of wifi, I think I can get a apartment above the mega mall streets for 750 rmb a month.

your city seems a little more expensive but that's to be expected, this is more of a industrial city I think, truth is i might have a completely different experience, that could be said for any city in china though, so much culture packed in to one country, it's amazing how blind you are to that fact until you come here.
magnum
Junior Poster
 
Posts: 555
Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2011 9:43 pm

PreviousNext

Return to Trip Reports, Travel Experiences, Expat Stories

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest