UPDATE: The Forum has been RESTORED! See announcement here. Welcome back everyone!
Join John Adams, world renowned Intl Matchmaker, Monday nights 8:30 EST for Live Webcasts!
And check out Five Reasons why you should attend a FREE AFA Seminar! See locations and dates here.
View Active Topics View Your Posts Latest 100 Topics FAQ Topics Mobile Theme
Post your trip reports, travel experiences, and updates abroad. Or your expat story if you already live overseas. Note: To post photos and images, insert the image URL between the tags [img]and[/img] after uploading them to a third party site.
I don't post here very often, mostly just browse, but one thing caught my eye. You mentioned in one of the posts that middle/upper class girls are extremely hard to get and those that say they aren't, simply are mistaken the class of the girls. Well I definitely say middle class girls are quite obtainable and even upper class girls in the right situation but let me break down the classes to see if you agree. I have known filipinas from all classes (well my opinion of those classes). Feel free to disagree.
- Top tier, 1% born into rich families or top executives
- Almost impossible to obtain unless you have connections
- prefer attractive young professionals with long extended time periods in the Country
- money is no issue, multiple cars, Foreign schools, daddy's money, best clothes, private gated housing, shopping sprees, extravagant vacations
-very very rare on dating sites, but I did meet one : )
- Usually quite intelligent, hard workers, well educated, established high-end professionals in their firm, top Universities
- Private flats, Own a nice car, multiple maids, money usually not an issue, multiple trips a year
- Possible but rare on dating sites. Must get to know them through friends but still possible to meet at bars/ events
- Prefer Young (25-35) attractive guys with extended periods in country
- Nurses, engineers, accountants, Degree holders
- Small flat or live with friends, can provide for themselves but are more frugal and budget minded, take public transportation, a few small weekend trips a year
- 10-30% on dating sites, obtainable through friends or public areas, cold approach a little difficult but not impossible
- Prefer established guys (25-45) that are staying in the country but open to overseas relationships, helps to know friends
- Mall workers, hotel staff, restaurant employees
- Live with family or friends, high school or vocational school, frugal and very budget minded, trips are rare, public transportation used, eat cheap restos
- Easily obtainable in any venue, prefer (18-55) but age usually doesn't matter, 40-60% on dating sites
- Vender workers, rural province areas, maids, comes from very poor families, will need help
- Easily obtainable, 15-30% on dating sites
Now I've dated a girl in both upper, upper-middle, and middle. It is possible but to be honest upper-middle, and middle tend to have the best girls. Upper class girls are usually dual and materialistic, not much different from American girls. Upper class girls are nearly impossible but in all honesty, where aren't they in the world?
But lets look at your age group you've been pursing. 19-27 year olds. In what area of the world are 19-27 year olds highly established and well off and would fall into the upper to upper middle range? Unless they are top of their class, with boundless experience, they haven't progressed in their field enough to make a outstanding salary. The other side would be that they were born into wealth. So the age group that you tend to date are going to seem like lower class but in reality they are middle class and right where they should be. Now if you were looking at filipinas with, say, a chemical engineering degree in the age range of 32-40, you would find some upper to upper-middle girls. Intelligent girls with life experience, and an established career. But that same girl at 22-26 isn't going to be in that class yet and probably will be at least somewhat financially conscience. Remember the Philippines is a poor country and junior professionals starting out don't get paid shit.
Now I have several friends who fall into the middle class, (engineers, accountants, nurses) that are very open to dating foreigners and some are either married or looking for them. Some have tried dating sites but to be honest they tell me some legit horror stories (guys asking for sexual favors, wanting a mail order bride, being extremely weird, etc.), and most have given up. A 27 year old in the philippines isn't desirable by the local population. Some of these girls may have children, lost trust in guys, or have just stopped looking. Finding these girls should be the key. A man 46 years old in my opinion should not be looking for an 18- 23 year old. The mental connection (as youve seen) is simply not there. You can find some real jewels in the upper 20's early 30's range. Don't pass on women with children either. They are much more likely to be loyal and loving. I'm 24, attractive looking and I don't even go for the young girls. I prefer girls my own age or a year or two older. They tend to be more settled and less immature. I have pics of every girl in the classes above I've been with or that is a friend or that is married to a friend. I'm not gonna post them here but if you'd like me to pm you them, that would be some proof for you.
I'll echo Rock's thought process here. I dated my wife for quite a long time before we got married. Sex was absolutely out of the question until she was married. Never underestimate that number of "good Catholic girls" in this country....and they take it very very seriously!!!
I feel for you with these girls that looks like they are teenagers. I met this Filipina that looked 16 in the USA working as a waitress. I asked her how long she'd been in the USA and when did her parents move to USA. She said she was married to an American and was 27 and not 16!
Size and age are psychologically linked. A 6'4" 14 year old boy is going to "appear" older. A shorter guy is going to "appear" younger. When I was 25 since I was kinda short I looked like a teenager - not good for my dating success. But at 40 no one thought I was over 30.
Same with weight. Even in middle school girls are starting to get chunky. A 5'1" Filipina, weighing 90-something pounds is gonna seem younger. My 5'2" wife is just shy of 26 and some people think she is a teen. That's not her problem, it's the problem of fat 26 year olds who are already topping 150 lbs.
OTOH we have several Pinay friends who are in their mid-40s and look 10-15 years younger. I tell my wife that's her future
I'm talking to a Christian Fili girl now...who said no kissing before marriage...but then said she was joking. I def think sex is out of the picture too. Soooo...how it is AFTER marriage? I'm sure there's a lot of talk before hand...but do they continue to be sexual, affectionate and want to explore?
Steve is in Colombia now. He must be having a great time. We will await his trip report!
Check out my FUN video clips in Russia and Female Encounters of the Foreign Kind video series and Full Russia Trip Videos!
Join my Ukrainian/Russian Women Dating Site to meet thousands of legit foreign girls at low cost!
"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne
Did steve get scammed by his makati girl?
Quite a few malcontents have no real goal in mind, so closure is not an option. They are merely entertained
by the thrill of the chase and the inevitable explanations for the failure, a "failure" they needed in order to continue in the mode.
I am curious as well. He doesn't seem to post here much anymore.
As I remember, Steve has been engaged quite a few times over the years. But the actual marriage in each case never seems to materialize. Not sure why. That's a mystery perhaps only Steve understands.
I think the problem is like hammanta has always said the more and more you go to asia the more pickier and more you want to keep your options open.
I dont blame him actually. I think he is trying to force it on himself but really doesn't feel a connection with these girls he has met or feels they aren't quite up to his standards or maybe he feels there is som ulterior motive. F or example the makati girl. Yeah she is attractive but he ran off to columbia and said he wasn't impresse when he first met her. He later formed a bond online. Not exactly the type of girl youd want to marry. Generally you either are head over heels with a girl or not. At least in my case. I either like a girl or not and looks isn't even all of the reason either because ive had girls uglier than some and felt a great connection and friendship vs some girls who were more attractive or innocent and higher quality who I dont like for various reasons. Looks help though but they can only go so far.
I'd rather not speculate because I don't know the guy, but that can be a symptom. Once you go abroad a lot of times you gain a feeling of freedom and of choice. The same cute girl you would kill for in America might be something that you are unsure of abroad, or take for granted. I guess the feeling of unknown creeps in or "hey, if I can get this, perhaps there is a hotter or better girl out there somewhere in the world." I was always under the assumption that with age this feeling passes but of course there are always exceptions.
Then again perhaps he is still engaged to the girl and just hasn't updated us. Who knows?
yeah maybe he is still with her.
I dont think it passes with age i think what happens is as a guy gets older and uglier he sees that it becomes harder and hard to get what he REALLY wants so after a certain point he gets sick of the effort and because of his age and lower sex drive he just "settles" for what he can get because its not high enough to justify the extra work to find it. Pete is one example who didn't want to settle for a 5 or 6 he said, he was gunning for much higher. I dont think that desire ever goes away.
But I think will n dowd syndrome can affect someone very easily in asia especially if they are needy or have issues before going abroad. Thats one reason why im better back in america despite being lonely i just can't control myself and i get out of control. at least back in america i can save money and focus on my work. I really think asia is for 3 types of people (guys who go there for a few weeks to blow off steam and sightsee, guys who are looking for a wife and are willing to take it very slow and not go for any girl, guys who are living there permanently and can take the approach of looking for a serious good partner) The danger becomes when you become a sexpat or pseudo expat who is there on a temporary basis for only part of the year or permanntly where you plop yourself into a hotel and try to justify why you want to live in a rotten 3rd world country like will n dowd and mrbluelight and me.