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Post your trip reports, travel experiences, and updates abroad. Or your expat story if you already live overseas. Note: To post photos and images, insert the image URL between the tags [img]and[/img] after uploading them to a third party site.
2 months ago after seeing a bunch of very mismatched AMWF couples in some online threads I got hope and also found out half of them met online. Went to some AMWF dating website and as expected nearly all the guys were very unattractive so almost no competition. On the site for a few days and then I started connecting with by far the hottest girl on the site.
This is an example of an AMWF couple I consider extremely mismatched for reference. (This is not the girl I was talking to).
After hours of skype messaging and a bit of skype video chat she stopped responding to me out of the blue. She claims to be single but her facebook still says she is in a relationship so on our last call I brought this up and she played dumb about it so I knew she was lying. After a couple days of no contact I cracked and asked for an explanation. This was her response:
Basically saying she finds me unattractive and led me on for whatever reason wtf. I would be able to brush it off except this is what her boyfriend looks like...
And this is her...
Obviously I was in complete shock that she finds this guy attractive but not me. They met online on the same exact site when she was 15. Hes in Canada shes in Poland. Hes visited once in 2 years. They talked 1 year before first meeting. The mom somehow was ok with a 30yo man staying at their house and banging her 16yo daughter at the time. I don't know a single parent that would be ok with a 30yo guy banging their teen daughter. As a result I treated this whole "relationship" like a big joke and thought I could win her over in person if I just took a trip up there and we started connecting again.
As of right now I just got back from the trip. I ended up flying 6k miles to meet this girl only once. We met for 3 hours had dinner went for a walk and it went ok but then before 2nd meetup she says that her boyfriend will breakup with her if we meet again. At first it was I just broke up with my boyfriend, then it was we're still together but I'm unhappy and ready to breakup like I've done multiple times in the past, and now its I still love him so we can't meet anymore.
Impossible to get over. This is a 10/10 young village girl who speaks fluent english and has a serious asian fetish so I know this was by far the best looking girl I would ever have a shot with in my life who is also LTR material. Its only downhill from here since no girl will ever come close to her.
^last night @ dinner (i took this pic)
text log this afternoon
Listen i did meet you but i don't know if i can meet you more
My boyfriend told me he will break up with me if i meet again
How can u be with someone that controlling and insecure
Not a healthy relationship
Good? He isn't controlling. He is just worried about me. He thinks it is cruel that guy come to country for me and I shouldn't do that
Yeah because I am hurting someone
No you didn't do anything wrong I did it to myself
I thought u were not scared of him breaking up with u? That is literally the definition of controlling.
I am scared not because i need him but because i love him and i want to be with him
You've only seen this guy once in 2 yrs. You only feel this strongly bc hes all u know. If you were in korea instead of a small village u would see how much else is out there.
Trust is probably the number one component to making a successful relationship. I appreciate you as a friend but the fact that he is giving you an ultimatum is not really fair to you and he's not being very respectful.
Whatever decision you make I will stand by you and support you because I really value our friendship and I've had a great time while visiting
Listen i think you don't really know about my relationship. It isn't how often you meet. He met my whole family here. And my whole family accepts him as a part of family. He talks with me everyday. He is sacrificing a lot too. He could meet Canadian girlfriend. But he doesn't. He waits patiently for me. No matter where I go and how long. He has been good to me and he loves me. And I know it.
I guess this means u don't want to see each other anymore?
I guess I don't. My mom is mad I met you too. She just called me
Why? All we did was talk
But she thinks it is creepy you came all the way here
This is exactly what I was afraid of coming here. I guess there is no point in being here any longer
I don't know any person who would fly to a girl after knowing me for like 1 month, not even talking to me before too much, I think I did tell you not to come
What was the point of even being on the site if youre in a great relationship?
I am meeting people there. And honestly a lot of them are great friends. And don't criticize my boyfriend. They treat me as a friend. Not potential girlfriend.
Didnt realize it was that bad to be honest about my feelings
It isn't but being honest is just telling me how you feel, not trying to des courage me in my relationship or think I would move so fast after 2 years. Isn't it immature
You are right. And I dont mean to pressure you. I want u to be happy I just thought we could be happier. I still want to see u one last time on friday but if not I understand I'll leave here shortly. But I do need to know right away.
I won't meet you anymore I don't think it would change anything
Definitely got too optimistic when u said u tried to start a relationship with some other guy during your 1week break.
But I realized during that break that I don't want anyone else. I dont blame you for anything. I just think you were too crazy and unrealistic coming here
Crazy yes but unrealistic not necessarily I was willing to stay up to 2 months if things went well I think that was more than enough time. I felt if I were good enough I could win u over.
And that is crazy for me. You did talk to me little while but it isnt enough to really get to know me as a person and see if you would like to date me. You have only seen good sides of me and you really don't know who I am really. Before meeting my boyfriend we talked for 1 year everyday. Then I was sure he loves me not only because I am pretty. He got to know everything and then he came. For me coming like this is really scary. I basically don't know you. I can't start relationship so fast and knowing someone was so desperate to see me even if you don't know a lot about me
Sorry u feel that way I just felt it was necessary bc I cant expect u take the internet seriously. Like whatever bad thoughts made u initially stop talking to me I felt I could fix in person. Does that make sense?
No it doesnt. For me this is too much. This is way too crazy for me to understand. Why would you care so much. I am different kind of person I think you are good guy for American girls. Even the way you all talk. I am raised differently and many times I felt you are from different world. I felt you trying to buy me. You focus on things I don't value in my life.
For example if u stopped talking to me bc u felt there was no connection, nothing I could say online would change that. But if we met I felt I couldve changed your mind.
This is trying too much to win someone over. You don't need particularly me to be in relationship with you. I told you in Internet many times but you still came here. If I don't want to talk to someone it won't change when I meet them in real life. Internet has always been a place where I meet people and treat seriously.
It wasnt just your looks u probably forgot when I said I was blown away that u spend your birthday with your mom and take family so seriously in general, plus not wanting to ever take advantage of anyone. American girls dont have these character traits, esp when they have looks, so u were like the whole package and that is why. I wasnt trying to buy you I just wanted to let u know that I could take care of u well and I was willing to give u everything I had.
Do you want to say anything more?
Doesnt matter what I say at this point
Yeah I want to say goodbye
If you ever meet a girl that seems perfect to you never act the way you did with me. Even if I wasn't with my boyfriend and met you first I would not date you. Everything you did was scary and not healthy. Nobody acts like that. This was not necessary. It is too desperate it isn't how things normally evolve with the couple. If you ever meet a perfect girl and act like that you won't get her. Just relax, dont be so tense, just work, do your stuff and try to be a true friend first instead jumping into relationship right away. It is disrespectful to come to somebody's country and try girl you "care about" break up with her boyfriend. Did you really think I am so easy? Even if my boyfriend did break up with me I would need years to recover, not few days. Planning to stay here two months scared me most of all. When you asked me if I would be with you if I didn't know my boyfriend I wasn't brave enough to tell you that you are simply not my type. Physically and personality wise. You are opposite actually. I didn't want to be so harsh but I think if I will be honest like that will be best for you. Forget about me. My boyfriend means all to me now and I don't care if you think he is hopeless and you could give me better. You wouldn't and you couldn't. He knew that you came here only for me and he knew what you want to do. Being desperate like that will only hurt you. Take care and have a safe trip back home.
As a result of doing a ton of research on Poland and polish girls in general this was even more shocking because it painted a completely different image than what she actually is. Gave her benefit of doubt and thought she was a typical good village girl but shes actually pretty westernized.
-Didnt thank me for dinner
-Wanted to go to another sushi place the next time. I thought nothing of this but locals have told me that a true village girls first pick would be something really cheap.
-Posts fetty wap videos on her fb page
-When a pic of her and a guy at a party surfaced on IG gook bf got mad so she took a 1 week break. f***ed that guy immediately then went crawling back to gook bf bc the guy only wanted to be FWB.
-Spends a lot of time on cam chat sites like tinychat/chatroulette
Uploading these two audio clips to show how sweet & innocent she appears on the surface. Extremely deceiving. One of the most angelic voices I've ever heard.
In conclusion I know I was an idiot for coming out here. All of my friends urged me not to go on this trip it was a retarded idea, but she is also a horrible person for leading me on like this and wasting so much of my time. I will never make the mistake of putting myself in a position to get seriously hurt like this ever again. I do just fine with slightly above average American women here at home and get complimented on my physical appearance pretty regularly, but its never from a girl I would start a LTR with so its meaningless to me. I saw a real future with this girl even though she was only 17 so this hurts a lot. I am 23 btw.
Last edited by HawaiianStyle on April 9th, 2016, 2:44 pm, edited 3 times in total.
As far as I see, you never met this woman in real life.
To connect by internet and exchange of pictures and some nice text means nothing. Forget her.
My morale was too low to continue with the trip so I went home immediately. Can some of you expats chime in and tell me how different this is from the stereotypical polish girl? Aside even aside from this experience honestly the trip was pretty disappointing. I read so many good things about Poland that simply did not live up to the hype. I went to Rzeszow to meet this girl and thought it would be better than the overly touristy Krakow but the serious language barrier combined with the fact that there is seriously nothing to do outweighs any foreigner exotic effect imo.
She has a man. Leave her alone. I figure it this way. It isn't just that you aren't supposed to lust after your neighbor's wife. It goes on to say anything else that belongs to your neighbor.
That must include fornication partners known as girlfriends. Just imagine you were able to steal her. Then by necessity, someone would come and steal her from you. That wouldn't feel too good.
There are single women out there. You just have to find them. No reason to go stealing that which belongs to another man, if only because you wouldn't want some other man to do that to you.
I figure a man becomes your neighbor when you are able to steal his woman, because you are then capable of stealing her due to proximity (and you might imagine hurting him to free her from him).
You may choose to call it "Westernization," but I am sure that behavior existed even before there was a "West" to ize anyone. She's a ho, bro. Open your eyes. A hoe is a hoe. Nationality, ethnicity don't matter.
This is why I say men need discernment skills, not expatriation or foreign women. Open your eyes and evaluate women. Don't be so desperate that you'll ignore obvious signs of whoredom. Letting a whore into your
life is one of the surest ways to ruin it. Why bother running away from AWs if you are just going to run into the hands of a "westernized" woman? In other words, why run away from one whore because she's a whore,
only to run into the arms of another whore? Then when you encounter a whore, you blame it on a geographical location. Nope, it's cause she's a ho.
As much as I hate to say it, I have never flown some place to meet a woman who I knew had a boyfriend ahead of time. I like to know the women I want are truly available. A woman should give herself freely. I don't think a woman should have to
be talked into anything. Actually I don't think it is even possible to talk a woman into being with you (unless you are a deeply manipulative PUA, which most men aren't). The answer is either yes or no.
You should never let a woman string you along. Listen closely here. There are psycho women who will do this. I've experienced this myself, where some slut seriously needs to receive praise from men. They want to know that you find
them sexy and attractive. They'll do their best to reel you in, but they never have any intention of ever going with you. It is all just to see how far they can get you to go for them. They want to know how great their sexual hold over
men is. Unfortunately, Mr. Hawaiian, it sounds like you allowed yourself to become the victim of a rather serious and magnificent attention whore of the most massive proportion. You did ALL this FOR HER. Imagine the ego boast.
She probably feels the joy equivalent to what a woman who poses for Playboy feels, like a goddess who could get men to melt by just the batting of her eyelashes.
Don't allow this to happen again. That doesn't mean avoiding women. Pay attention. It means after the woman says no the first time, ignore her. She no longer exists as a sexual entity or prospect. They know that once they tell you no, and then
you come back, they know they have a sucker who will give them all the attention and praise they need, and who will also do backwards flips and jump through hoops, all on their own, without her having to ask him to do any of it.
Wake up. There are sociopathic women out there. They aren't all in the USA, Canada or England. They are in every nation on earth. That's why you need to evaluate women. Use judgment. Exercise your power to say no.
And if a woman ever says no, or doesn't do what you want, if it is a reasonable request, it is because she is not interested in you. If a woman wants you, she will find a way to make things work between you after you have opened the door.
Her boyfriend knows what's going on.
She told you her boyfriend knows what's going on.
Her boyfriend is correct about what's going on.
You also admitted you brought this upon yourself.
Stop being so desperate. See subconsciously you knew what was going on. IT IS CRUEL what she is doing, but you are also doing it to yourself. She doesn't want you. She just wants to see how
far you are willing to go, which is far indeed.
Bro you're lucky she even showed up at all. She could have just tried to check you out from afar, or dodge your call once you landed. If she were anymore cruel than what she is, she would have done those things to you.
There is no limit to the cruelty of some women. Forget this woman. She would have no problem if your life ended tomorrow. You are not a real person to her. You are just a thing, like a toy or a doll. Don't take it personally though.
Although you willingly walked into this, she would have done this to any other man who would have reacted the same way you did. There are many men like you.
But you don't have to be that way anymore. The man is the prize, not the woman. Wake up. Don't do extravagant things. You should wait to see which women are willing to do things for you as the man. You just have to be the one to
open the door, but they should walk through it willingly and freely, without hesitation, without second thoughts, without protest. If a woman is giving you such opposition, you know she is a double minded psycho. Those will also
ruin your life.
See the problem really is female freedom. They're allowed to do what they want, and when they have no morality, they are willing to do this to men. Since women are free to behave this way, men need to have an extra amount
of self respect, judgment, patience and open eyes.
This woman should of never agreed to meet you since she has a boyfriend. Forget this broad and move on to women who are single and available. Don't give up on Polish girls over this incident, then again don't just focus on Polish chicks either. There are quite a few white girls who like the idea of dating Asian guys.
"When I think about the idea of getting involved with an American woman, I don't know if I should laugh .............. or vomit!"
"Trying to meet women in America is like trying to decipher Egyptian hieroglyphics."
Holy mackerel!! talk about putting all your eggs in one basket.
You do not, DO NOT travel 6k miles without some kind of backups, unreal!
2/3 of women are absolute time wasters, with absolutely no consideration for your time, efforts or feelings, it's not even out of malice, those registers are just simply not up there. And add today's brain-rotting by social media, you are just some f*king text on the screen, and they can't deabstract that to a real person.
You have to be really careful and always have backups or what not to be able to get at the remaing 1/3 to find the gems. You MUST identify time wasters early on, your life is too valuable man.
Yesss, I'm not asian, but, what website is that one?
Fantastic comments, i can't quote it all
Last edited by droid on April 9th, 2016, 6:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
She is 5'2" 100lb very busty and has a near flawless face plus perfect english. Never seen anyone so physically attractive and young as well. Girls that have a face like hers on a petite frame almost always are flat chested. Its so hard to move on because it is extremely difficult to find a girl who even comes close to that level of physical attractiveness.
Thanks for taking the time to write all that. Needed it. Her boyfriend is a an ugly & broke 31yo guy who was recently living with his mom and shes only seen him once in 2 years so I treated their relationship like a joke and admittedly tried to use logic & reason to convince her to leave that guy. Ya like that was ever going to work...
I agree its unreasonable to base my thoughts on Polish women solely off this one terrible experience, but after this I was too broken in spirits to do anything but come back home immediately. After leaving such a sour taste in my mouth I don't see myself ever traveling abroad again unless I find a buddy to go with and I've had some time to get over this (at least a year). Reading about Poland extensively, namely what Polish women are like in detail created a lot of expectations heading into this trip which only caused further disappointment.
Last edited by HawaiianStyle on April 9th, 2016, 5:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.
I've made the mistake of giving up after a terrible rejection many times, and I regret this each time. One time I was trying to hook up with this chick who told all of my coworkers how much she was attracted to me, but whenever
we talked, she was rude, abrasive, mean and insulting. My idiotic friends told me that is normal for beautiful women, although she was just average. After I got fed up with her, a truly amazing beauty flirted with me one day when
I was in the emergency room. She was one of the most gorgeous women I had ever seen. But because I had recently been treated so terribly by that wench, I just couldn't muster up the courage to say more than hello to this rare beauty.
That also happened another time when I was traveling and the first girl said no. Then I was bummed for the rest of the whole of the trip, and I could not recognize that there were many other women who were blatantly flirting with me,
and who were willing. Just I was still locked in that woe is me I got rejected by my first girl mode for the whole trip. Real waste cause I could have hooked up with some amazingly hot chicks.
Last edited by Adama on April 9th, 2016, 5:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Thanks. You should know, at least I think I have a sound mind. I mean, people think I am crazy, but I do my best to be reasonable. I believe I see reality clearly for what it is.
Don't travel anywhere, not even down the block, for a woman!
What is your life about? What is your thing? Do that!
Women of all types are everywhere. The more you do your thing, and put your soul and energy into it, the more women will see a man going somewhere and want to go with him!
That Polish girl will be hung up on her bf for the rest of her life because he was her 1st man! There's a reason why some folks on this board will only consider marrying a virgin. There is a biological bond that happens with a girl's first man that can never be repeated. It will never be that strong with any other. It doesn't matter if she has only seen him once in two years. They did the deed. She is his and subconsciously always will be.
“b***y is so strong that there are dudes willing to blow themselves up for the highly unlikely possibility of b***y in another dimension." -- Joe Rogan