Long time lurker and first time poster

[thecobra2]

I have been reading the forums for several months now and I am happy to say that I share a very similar viewpoint as those on this board. I was born as a Canadian but I was fortunate because I have always had little trouble finding girlfriends. As I stated earlier. I grew up in a small town in Western Canada and have never been satisfied with Western Women or Western society in general. A running joke between me and my friends in high school was that we were surrounded by a bunch of sheeple. I was a fairly big guy in high school and I was on the wrestling and football team. However, I was not a jock and I was friends with the unpopular people at my school. My friends got picked on a lot and I would always stand up for them. I had a bit of a tough guy image in high school. I was always in fights with people and basically stood up for the little guy. At this time I was completely brainwashed by Western Culture and was basically one of the useless idiots who were ignorant of the world around them. I thought it was normal to have deal with gang beatings, my car getting stolen, women being raped, being mugged in the streets and people constantly arguing with you over trivial things.

Anyways, my first trip abroad occurred in 2001 when I moved to Japan for a year to English. At that time I was 22 and I was dating a Canadian girl. We agreed that we would continue the relationship while I was living in Japan. I called her every week and emailed her on a regular basis. However, she never seemed too thrilled by my phone calls and never made any effort to contact me herself. In other words she changed a lot. After living here for 9 months, she came and visited me in Japan (at my expense). Before she left, I made one request which was to bring an empty suitcase so I could send some stuff back home with her. However, she could not even do that so we ended up getting into a huge fight and broke up. That was the biggest regret of my life. I will never recommend doing a long distance relationship. Far too complicated and people change a lot over the course of a year. After one year I was forced to leave Japan because I only had a Working Holiday VISA which was only good for a year. But that year opened up my eyes to two things. Other cultures and other women! I can't tell you how great that year was and I had no idea that such a wonderful place existed.

When I went back to Canada I did some soul searching and decided that I wanted to return to Japan again. So I went back to University to get a four year degree so that I could work in Japan again. During my first year in University I started dating another Canadian girl and we pretty much lived together for the four years that we were in University. This is when I got my first taste of what married life would be like. She was a nice enough of a girl but was very controlling. She would fight with me all the time because I would go drinking with my friends once a week and we would always argue about chores around the house.Also, she was horrible with money buying a new car while we were in University and maxed out her credit card. I managed to pay for 8 years of University with taking out a single loan (that's a whole other story). After four years, I finished University and headed back to Japan to teach English again. I brought the Canadian girl with me, which was the second biggest regret of my life. She was miserable in Japan and would cry herself to sleep at night because she was lonely and was scared. However, I had a fantastic year once again and I decided that I wanted to stay longer. But unfortunately I broke my foot and was forced to go back to Canada to get surgery. I made so many wonderful friends, had so may great memories and felt completely at home over the course of the year. I was so sad to leave Japan and return to a country that I had grown to despise.

While I was back in Canada (again!) I went back to University to get a Masters Degree. However, I hated every second of it because I was once again surrounded by the sheeple which I hated with a passion. I ended breaking up with the Canadian girl shortly after my first year in my Masters degree. We had been dating for 6 years at that point. We broke up mainly because she wanted to settle down, have kids, move to the suburbs, buy a mini van and become a soccer mom! I had no intention of doing any of these things. In fact these are the very people that I despise! Money hungry slaves to the bank. Anyways, I did some more soul searching and decided that I wasn't happy in Canada once again due to the culture. I ended up meeting a very nice Japanese girl in Canada and we started dating. However, her VISA expired after only dating for two months but I was absolutely blown away by her. She was kind, beautiful, open, honest, fun and never criticized me. Over the course of that year I was mugged at knife point, my apartment was robbed and I had almost no friends in the city. In fact most people thought I was pretty strange because I would openly criticize Canadian culture and the people I was surrounded by. So I hurried up and finished my Masters Degree and headed back to Japan for the third time.

I ended up living about 3 hours by train from the Japanese girl that I met in Canada and she really made an effort to make it work. We would alternate weeks when we would visit each others city. She would come and cook me dinner, help me clean my apartment, translate for me and basically made my life in Japan a dream. I have learned so much about the culture from her and I have come to really respect Japanese people and the culture. She has been absolutely wonderful. About 2 months ago I was granted a transfer with my company (still teaching English) and now we live about 20 minutes away from each other. We do everything together and rarely fight.

Anyways, I am 32 years old now and spent the last 10 years of my life going back and forth between Canada and Japan. During this time, I have discovered that my home is Japan and it is no longer Canada. When I visit home I am disgusted by the rude and ignorant behavior of the people (Vancouver riots after Stanley Cup), the women and the culture. I have no intention of returning home and will gladly take my adequate salary teaching English in a country I love surrounded by people I respect rather than living in a place I detest. My girlfriend is beautiful, has the Japanese work ethic, kind, never loses her temper, is good with money and is a blast to be around. The people are very kind, generous and overall it's a very very safe country to live in. There is almost zero crime in Japan. Women can walk alone at night, you never see any fights, and I feel so safe her in Japan. The entire country is based around peace and respect of your fellow man. Right now my Japanese girlfriend is sleeping peacefully in my loft upstairs and I am quietly typing on my keyboard so I don't wake her up. She has to get up at 5am for work! That's my girl!

I know this was a very long read and I appreciate anyone that has read the entire story. I believe that I am proof that you can make it happen if you put in the effort and hard work! I have escaped three times and I have no regrets about the path that I have chosen. If you are unhappy where you are living do not listen to what other people say. Just get up and find a place where you are happier. I have no doubts that you WILL BE HAPPIER ABROAD TOO! If you have any questions for me please feel free to ask!

[Think Different]

Great story! Very uplifting and positive...it gives hope to those who may not have any. Please stick around the forum and share your wisdom. I personally am fascinated by Japan and could learn a lot from you about the place. Japan tends to get a bit of short-shrift from some folks on here IMHO, so maybe you know something they don't, which made your experience so successful.

[pete98146]

Wonderful post TheCobra2! One of my best friends and his wife (both teachers) went to Japan as ESL teachers for 5 years and they had a blast. Like you they never wanted to come back to but they had a child and that sealed their fate and they came back to Seattle.

Congratulations on finding the joys of a good asian lady. I too have discovered true bliss as my wife shares many of the same traits as your partner. Also enjoy reading success stories. So many of these guys on the forum acknowledge that the western woman is a pain in the ass but they still sit on the fence and don't put forth a solid game plan to meet one.

Keep us updated and welcome to this forum.

[thecobra2]

I really appreciate the feedback. I think people should first travel to the country and see what it is really like before moving there. I was lucky because I jumped in feet first and found a place that I love. Japanese people are extremely shy but once you break the ice they are great people to hang around with. Girls are especially shy even around Japanese guys but this can be very cute especially compared to Western women. However, because Japanese men are also shy, a lot of times the women are not approached that often. So, girls tend to respond well when they are approached.

I should note that I am a big fan of Tom Leykis supporter and he is one of the people that got me set straight on women. Basically, what he talked about on his program I saw in all of my Canadian girlfriends and I did not like it. If anyone is interested in listening to some of his shows they are archived at:

http://www.leykisonline.com/

[E_Irizarry]

Why aren't there more comments reflecting upon this thread???? This one should be a sticky and it's a tearjerker of success here!!! (Fellas, I didn't cry this time so get over yourselves Hahahaha)

@TheCobra2,

You were an idiot for too damn long, but you have forced yourself to become cognizant of the very venomous culture that you had grown to despise. You had segued yourself into a culture where REAL veracity of multiculturalism is celebrated and not denigrated.

*I get my vocabulary from my 4-by-4 jail cell, homie* LMAO! Just playing on that part! LOL

But otherwise, I'm being vehemently serious here.

It sounds like you are going to die sayanora style over there in JP. BTW, how badly has the post-nuclear disaster become and how badly has the fallout become?

In more addendum, have you read my story about what happened to me and my last JP lady whom I had met in university? (I speak Canadian; I don't say "college", I say "university", eh/"A" Hehehe!!)

[thecobra2]

Yep I will fully admit that I was a complete idiot when it came to women and it took a while to find what I wanted in life. The main thing is that I am very driven person and I don't complain about anything. In other words I keep my damn mouth shut and just do it. At any cost, just get the job done.

To give you a small dose of the difference between Japan and Canada. I was living in Japan at the time of the huge earthquake and nuclear disaster. I was living about 2 hours south of the epicenter. When the earthquake stuck I was teaching a class and everyone evacuated the school. I have been in many earthquakes in Japan but this was huge! Parked cars on the street nearly flipped from the power of the quake. To make a long story short. One of my students, who happens to be a earthquake research rode his bike to my school to make sure the Native teachers at the school were alright. He then took us to a earthquake shelter. There was no water, electricity, grocery stores were closed and gasoline was quickly running out. He along with several other Japanese friends spent the night in the shelter with us. We were given food, water and blankets. After spending the night sleeping on a cardboard box I decided that I needed to get further away. Didn't fully understand what was happening around us because of the lack of electricity. Another one of students volunteered to drive me a train station approximately 2 hours away so that I could escape further south. These Japanese people were amazing during this time. I had so many people help me out in ways that I can not express in words and I am forever grateful of their kindness.

In comparison, when I I broke my foot in Japan 6 years ago and had to return to Canada to get surgery, I received the exact opposite treatment. I couldn't walk for about 6 months and do you know how many of my close friends in my hometown came to visit me. None! Not a f***ing soul outside of my family. Do you know how many phone calls I got to see how things were going? None! Not a damn person! Not only did I have a broken foot but to top it all off I just got back to town after being away for an entire year. If that does not show you why I hate my country I don't know what else will. I should note that my own family was wonderful during the entire ordeal.

Back to your question about the current state of the crisis. Things have settled down a bit. I am now living about 350 km south of the disaster area. I don't have to worry about radiation so much but there are reports of small traces of radiation showing up in our food and water supply. However, I am not particularly worried about it. Neither are any Japanese people that I know. Do not believe what you see on Western Media. Life is very very normal where I am living right now. In fact, I am going to Disneyland this weekend with my girlfriend. hah hah hah It is going to take more than the worlds largest earthquake, nuclear disaster, a tsunami and an active volcano to get me back to Canada!!!!!

[OutWest]

I have been reading the forums for several months now and I am happy to say that I share a very similar viewpoint as those on this board. I was born as a Canadian but I was fortunate because I have always had little trouble finding girlfriends. As I stated earlier. I grew up in a small town in Western Canada and have never been satisfied with Western Women or Western society in general. A running joke between me and my friends in high school was that we were surrounded by a bunch of sheeple. I was a fairly big guy in high school and I was on the wrestling and football team. However, I was not a jock and I was friends with the unpopular people at my school. My friends got picked on a lot and I would always stand up for them. I had a bit of a tough guy image in high school. I was always in fights with people and basically stood up for the little guy. At this time I was completely brainwashed by Western Culture and was basically one of the useless idiots who were ignorant of the world around them. I thought it was normal to have deal with gang beatings, my car getting stolen, women being raped, being mugged in the streets and people constantly arguing with you over trivial things.

Anyways, my first trip abroad occurred in 2001 when I moved to Japan for a year to English. At that time I was 22 and I was dating a Canadian girl. We agreed that we would continue the relationship while I was living in Japan. I called her every week and emailed her on a regular basis. However, she never seemed too thrilled by my phone calls and never made any effort to contact me herself. In other words she changed a lot. After living here for 9 months, she came and visited me in Japan (at my expense). Before she left, I made one request which was to bring an empty suitcase so I could send some stuff back home with her. However, she could not even do that so we ended up getting into a huge fight and broke up. That was the biggest regret of my life. I will never recommend doing a long distance relationship. Far too complicated and people change a lot over the course of a year. After one year I was forced to leave Japan because I only had a Working Holiday VISA which was only good for a year. But that year opened up my eyes to two things. Other cultures and other women! I can't tell you how great that year was and I had no idea that such a wonderful place existed.

When I went back to Canada I did some soul searching and decided that I wanted to return to Japan again. So I went back to University to get a four year degree so that I could work in Japan again. During my first year in University I started dating another Canadian girl and we pretty much lived together for the four years that we were in University. This is when I got my first taste of what married life would be like. She was a nice enough of a girl but was very controlling. She would fight with me all the time because I would go drinking with my friends once a week and we would always argue about chores around the house.Also, she was horrible with money buying a new car while we were in University and maxed out her credit card. I managed to pay for 8 years of University with taking out a single loan (that's a whole other story). After four years, I finished University and headed back to Japan to teach English again. I brought the Canadian girl with me, which was the second biggest regret of my life. She was miserable in Japan and would cry herself to sleep at night because she was lonely and was scared. However, I had a fantastic year once again and I decided that I wanted to stay longer. But unfortunately I broke my foot and was forced to go back to Canada to get surgery. I made so many wonderful friends, had so may great memories and felt completely at home over the course of the year. I was so sad to leave Japan and return to a country that I had grown to despise.

While I was back in Canada (again!) I went back to University to get a Masters Degree. However, I hated every second of it because I was once again surrounded by the sheeple which I hated with a passion. I ended breaking up with the Canadian girl shortly after my first year in my Masters degree. We had been dating for 6 years at that point. We broke up mainly because she wanted to settle down, have kids, move to the suburbs, buy a mini van and become a soccer mom! I had no intention of doing any of these things. In fact these are the very people that I despise! Money hungry slaves to the bank. Anyways, I did some more soul searching and decided that I wasn't happy in Canada once again due to the culture. I ended up meeting a very nice Japanese girl in Canada and we started dating. However, her VISA expired after only dating for two months but I was absolutely blown away by her. She was kind, beautiful, open, honest, fun and never criticized me. Over the course of that year I was mugged at knife point, my apartment was robbed and I had almost no friends in the city. In fact most people thought I was pretty strange because I would openly criticize Canadian culture and the people I was surrounded by. So I hurried up and finished my Masters Degree and headed back to Japan for the third time.

I ended up living about 3 hours by train from the Japanese girl that I met in Canada and she really made an effort to make it work. We would alternate weeks when we would visit each others city. She would come and cook me dinner, help me clean my apartment, translate for me and basically made my life in Japan a dream. I have learned so much about the culture from her and I have come to really respect Japanese people and the culture. She has been absolutely wonderful. About 2 months ago I was granted a transfer with my company (still teaching English) and now we live about 20 minutes away from each other. We do everything together and rarely fight.

Anyways, I am 32 years old now and spent the last 10 years of my life going back and forth between Canada and Japan. During this time, I have discovered that my home is Japan and it is no longer Canada. When I visit home I am disgusted by the rude and ignorant behavior of the people (Vancouver riots after Stanley Cup), the women and the culture. I have no intention of returning home and will gladly take my adequate salary teaching English in a country I love surrounded by people I respect rather than living in a place I detest. My girlfriend is beautiful, has the Japanese work ethic, kind, never loses her temper, is good with money and is a blast to be around. The people are very kind, generous and overall it's a very very safe country to live in. There is almost zero crime in Japan. Women can walk alone at night, you never see any fights, and I feel so safe her in Japan. The entire country is based around peace and respect of your fellow man. Right now my Japanese girlfriend is sleeping peacefully in my loft upstairs and I am quietly typing on my keyboard so I don't wake her up. She has to get up at 5am for work! That's my girl!

I know this was a very long read and I appreciate anyone that has read the entire story. I believe that I am proof that you can make it happen if you put in the effort and hard work! I have escaped three times and I have no regrets about the path that I have chosen. If you are unhappy where you are living do not listen to what other people say. Just get up and find a place where you are happier. I have no doubts that you WILL BE HAPPIER ABROAD TOO! If you have any questions for me please feel free to ask!

>>>Excellent post...a lot of men here should take heed, rather than spend their time bitching
about American women. I have been overseas most of the last 15 years, about 10 of those in
the Philippines. You capture my feelings perfectly as I am in the USA till July 7.

"When I visit home I am disgusted by the rude and ignorant behavior of the people (Vancouver riots after Stanley Cup), the women and the culture."

So many I observe here of all ages are stupid beyond belief, ignorant of any of the world and they behave
like absolute swine. I can almost handle the stupid and ignorant part, but the swine-like behavior
and hideously rude women is over the top. On top of all this, these people think they are God's gift...

Outwest.
Misamis Oriental, Mindanao

[E_Irizarry]

@thecobra2,

Again. Great post. +infinity!!!
I am glad that Western media embellishly exaggerates everything. Just like May 21, 2011 was supposed to be mankind's last day *like a 2012 movie or some shit*.

@OutWest,

Be careful here in the U.S. of Gay while on your visiting stay. [Don't be at the] Wrong place, wrong time: you know the slogan! And you've been warned!

[OutWest]

@thecobra2,

Again. Great post. +infinity!!!
I am glad that Western media embellishly exaggerates everything. Just like May 21, 2011 was supposed to be mankind's last day *like a 2012 movie or some shit*.

@OutWest,

Be careful here in the U.S. of Gay while on your visiting stay. [Don't be at the] Wrong place, wrong time: you know the slogan! And you've been warned!

Haha..LOL...yes, you are right...got to keep my eyes open. I do watch out most for bureaucrats...thugs
behind desks. Otherwise in the street I am still poor target even at 50...former career still holds...able
to do whatever it takes to "come back alive."...QK for those who know what that means...

Outwest

[Fenix]

Thank you for this post! I really appreciate it. Experiences like this make you want to work harder to get the hell out of your country. I am about to move to Europe by the end of 2011 (still haven't decided which country) so I am really excited to leave this hellhole called the United States. Thanks again for this thread. I had a bad day today and you made it much better.

[thecobra2]

I don't have any experience in Europe but I have left Canada three times now. So, I know that it may seem like a daunting task. Make sure you have a good plan in place before you leave......