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Regardless of whether or not you believe the Philippines is "the right place" for you to live, OP's fear that having his son grow up in the Philippines will turn him into an asshole is ridiculous and unfounded. Like any nation the Philippines has it's pros and cons, but unless you live in Angeles city or a metro Manila slum, I don't see it as a particularly bad place to raise a child in.
I also do not believe the average Filipino is more dishonest compared to other citizens of foreign nations. Of course there's a shit ton of corruption, but all poor countries are usually corrupt. If you don't want your child to grow up in a corrupt country, move to some place like Sweden or something. There's not a lot of places to pick from. All countries are corrupt to some extent, but the wealthier the country the less you will notice the corruption.
Marcos, the OP concerns about his son growing up to be an asshole are not unfounded. Have you spent time around d groups of middle class or upper class young men? Most of them could be used as "exhiibit A" for a Wikipedia article on assholes. Most of them are raised like little Lords, and fairly drip with an entitled attitude. They specialize in treating people like $hit.
Between my in-laws and my wife and myself, we employ 4 younger women. All of them talk of how their past Filipino employers treated them like dogs.believe me, if you are a middle class, upper middle or wealthy family son, you are an asshole almost by definition.
Due to an inheritance from his ancient aunt, my father in law went from being a middle class man, to being well off even by American standards. He is still a humble and kind gentleman who shows mercy and care towards the poor maids that work for him. That is exceptional in the Philippines, and probably exceptional for anywhere, but it especially glaring in the Philippines. Imagine, if you are a housekeeper, being told that you cannot eat any of "the good food" you prepare for your masters.. our housekeepers were in shock that we have them sit down and eat with us, and they eat the same food we do.
If your are not exposed to that social strata, it's not so evident, but if you are, the OPs concern is realistic.
The OP is a bit different from the average newbie question on this forum. He's not asking where he should go; he's already there and has been for years. Even if he is dead wrong, in all likelihood his mind is made up that for his family he should look at other options. Nor is he saying, "I live in Cebu - what other cities/towns should I consider?" So he will either: find another 3rd world country, fall in love with it or discover it too has dishonesty; go back to the 1st world, with it's pluses and minuses; or stay in the Philippines and either adjust or become one of those older guys living there (and there are lots) who rail about the country, people, politics, etc.
Whether moving to a new house, neighborhood, city or country I always recommend making a list of must haves, nice to haves, and can't have, then decide what my proposed destination has and doesn't have and what I can live with. That list is gonna be different for everyone.
A tiny example. I'm at my work's cafe the other day waiting in line for breakfast. Next to me is a friend of mine. He's talking to the Mexican food server about how hot it is going to be that day (93) and they are both griping. I laughed and said, "I love it!" And it's true - I couldn't wait for the heat; it's been a cool summer so far. My friend turned to me and said, "I guess that why some people want to live in the Philippines."
You have to know yourself and what you can and cannot live with. Another buddy's married to a Pinay, likes the Philippines but can't stand the lack of sidewalks, as he likes to walk. For him, that's the deal breaker. For me I think that's a foolish reason but for him that's what strikes him as the biggest negative. To each his own.
Check out my blog @ www.marriedafilipina.com
Great responses, everyone. I was afraid I might be walking into an ambush here....haha. There's many things I love about the Philippines and I have several Filipino friends that will likely be lifelong amigos, but having a kid changes a lot. It shocked me to hear of Marcos suggesting to let your kid roam around the village...in a country where incestual rape is so prevalent and well documented. Hopefully he is exaggerating, and keeping a close eye on his kid. Thanks for your comments, Dave. It really comes down to knowing yourself and what you can tolerate. And thanks Outwest for elucidating what I could not.
Anyways, I didn't join the forum to bash on the Phils. If I was single, I would surely stay. Married?....maybe. Married with kids?....need to look elsewhere. And Malaysia is first on the list...hoping to travel there and a few other countries in the region in a few months. There's a place abroad for everyone....
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