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new bloke from UK

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new bloke from UK

Postby mattyman » Wed Sep 29, 2010 8:58 pm

Hello there, I'm a 24 yr old guy from the uk who feels that it's time to start exploring the world a bit. I was recently laid off my job yet have accumulated a safe amount of money to think about travelling round europe, and I thinking now would be a very good time to do so. In the short term I'm very tempted to do TEFL teaching and am already enrolled on an introductory course this october. T this stage I haven't yet decided whether or not to do a full 4-week CELTA course. I've heard that Spain, Czech republic and Turkey have got good opportunities for TEFL jobs, though Spain has extremely high unemployment. Any advice on TEFL courses and jobs would be good would be more than welcome btw. In the longer run I aim to do some conservation volunteering work with the VSO, fingers crossed.
Anyway, more about myself later. One thing that I must say about this site is that some of the articles are really enlightening and highlight a lot of social problems that seriously need more attention. I especially like the articles that talk about the conformity aspect of american culture and how one is made to feel bad about themselves if they don't conform to an ideal. A lot of the social problems discussed on this site are sadly, just as bad in the UK i.e. the workoholic, rat race lifestyle, you-are-what-you-do, neighbours not talking to each other etc. In the UK people do keep to themselves and yes, it is very difficult to initiate conversation with strangers (except the elderly). Young women do often walk around with their noses n the air in a snobby manner and they seldom smile. So yes, in many ways, in my opinion, the UK shares many of the social dysfunctionalities that america suffers as talked about on this site. Plus the cost of living in the UK is ridiculously expensive. In the long run I would like to go somewhere with a reasonable cost of living (i.e. not working every hour god sends to live in a glorified tin can) and where people are less paranoid, the pace of life slower, there's less aggression and coldness and where people have more traditional values.
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Postby jamesbond » Wed Sep 29, 2010 11:05 pm

Welcome, Mattyman! You have some good ideas about traveling to different countries and seeing what's out there. It sounds like the way of life in the UK is the same as it is here in the USA (fast paced, working long hours, no social life, unfriendly women, etc.).
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Postby Winston » Thu Sep 30, 2010 4:57 pm

Welcome Matty.

Another Englishman. Awesome. I'm glad you like my articles.

I heard that UK people are more educated and aware about the world though. The UK people I've met do not seem like Americans at all. They seem far more down to earth.

And I hear that blacks and asians are more well adjusted there without the inferiority complex due to less racism against them.

Do you know any honest insightful people who have spent a lot of time in the US and UK? If so, how do they compare them?

You are lucky that you can just travel to Europe by train. I wish it was that easy for us.

Are you a Doctor Who fan by the way?

Regards,
Winston
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Postby BellaRuth » Thu Sep 30, 2010 5:33 pm

Hi Matt. I'm also 24 and from the UK.

You sound just the same as me. There's no way I'm staying here, working like a dog, to live in a tiny house and pay off debts all my life.

I want to live a more laid-back, traditional, happy life without being a wage slave. Prices of living in the UK are beyond a jpke. I know people who have worked full time their whole lives, lived modestly and are still scared they will end up on the streets.

I'm applying for a postgrad in another European country as I speak and hopefully it will go from there.

Any idea where you'd like to go?
Toute connaissance est une réponse à une question. - Gaston Bachelard
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Postby ladislav » Thu Sep 30, 2010 8:33 pm

Welcome! I have a question, though. You guys being from the UK and being British, why would you feel the coldness?

A walrus does not feel cold and mole does not mind living in the dark.

That is your environment, so how do you know it is screwed up?
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Postby BellaRuth » Fri Oct 01, 2010 10:55 am

ladislav wrote:Welcome! I have a question, though. You guys being from the UK and being British, why would you feel the coldness?

A walrus does not feel cold and mole does not mind living in the dark.

That is your environment, so how do you know it is screwed up?


I wouldn't say we are cold, as in, our traditional way. I'd say it was politeness. It has a lot of history. I.e. if you avoid sitting next to someone on a bus and get a seat to yourself, to a Brit that's not cold, it's giving the other person their own space. But in other cultures it is considered 'cold'.

I'm certain this isn't the behaviour Matt is talking about because he would understand the British 'reserve' and the ways to get round it (the notorious weather subject, for example, as a way of asking a stranger if they would like to initiate conversation). It's to do with humility, not presuming the other person wants to talk to you and that they may be busy, but it's not an 'ice barrier', and easy removed if you understand it.

I think the coldness he is talking about is very different, about pride and hostility, and from young people. It's a new thing (notice he says the older generation are friendly). It's not a traditional British trait. It's snobbishness, a sense of entitlement, Americanised behaviour, usually demonstrated by celebrity-obsessed, materialistic princesses with fake nails and hair extensions.

Or at least that's my experience.

I would say there are more people like this now, but I still wouldn't say it's the general type here, at all. Maybe it stands out more as its so frustrating.
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Postby mattyman » Fri Oct 01, 2010 8:38 pm

Winston wrote:Welcome Matty.

Another Englishman. Awesome. I'm glad you like my articles.

I heard that UK people are more educated and aware about the world though. The UK people I've met do not seem like Americans at all. They seem far more down to earth.

And I hear that blacks and asians are more well adjusted there without the inferiority complex due to less racism against them.

Do you know any honest insightful people who have spent a lot of time in the US and UK? If so, how do they compare them?

You are lucky that you can just travel to Europe by train. I wish it was that easy for us.

Are you a Doctor Who fan by the way?

Regards,
Winston

People in the UK are certainly a lot more aware of world geography than americans are. I've heard of infamous americans that think that Europe is a country, not a continental and who don't know which country lies south of Scotland. We certainly don't have that level of ignorance here with regards to world geography. Is it true that creationism is taught in american schools as well as scientology, intelligent design and other religious mumbo jumbo?
In the main the UK is pretty heavily dumbed-down by the cult of celebrity and pop culture, to the extent that they never question anything the media throws at them and accept it all as gospel truth. A lot of young people here exhibit the shallow, air-head behaviour patterns. Judging each other and basing their worth on how they look, how 'coo' they are etc. A lot of young women here dress like plastic barbies and walk round in public with their noses in the air as if they think they're a supermodel. That's one thing I have hardly seen in France and Spain for instance. Yes there are down to earth people here, but sadly their in the minority, especially among the young people. People here definitely are in bubbles and cliques can be really hard to break into, trust me, I have been on the recieving end. Young people here are very materialistic and shallow, often judging each others worth by their material wealth and how they identify with a celebrity idol (i.e. coolness). In public there is definitely this 'mind yiour own business' vibe from strangers, again especially the young. It certainly hit me hard when I returned from Spain. All I can say is that the young people here are extremely americanized. Millions of times more so than French, Spanish, Russians, Austrians, Germans, Czechs, Italians and Thais that I have crossed paths with.

Anyway I have in fact met some young americans, last time I went to Spain. They seemed pretty sound though and more cultured than the average young brit. But then again they're probably the type of american that likes to travel and try out new cultures. I have heard some say that brits are more reserved than americans though. Beyond that I can't really compare the two. What I'm asserting is that the behaviour patterns and materialistic consumer culture that's taken over the UK has so americanised it to the extent that, in my opinion, it could almost pass a a 51st state.

As far as I'm aware blacks and asians are reasonably well settled in the UK, though there is quite a lot of racial prejudice. I heard that a large segment of the prison population are black for instance. I must also add that the UK is one of the most unequal societies in Europe with regards to distribution of wealth. The rich are getting richer and the poor poorer.

Funny you should mention about access to Europe. I have never actually caught the train through the Eurotunnel myself, though I've channel-hopped to France a few times. I do in fact live fairly close to a cross-channel ferry port.

Are you quite into Dr. Who? I say that I only follow it occassionally though I do enjoy it. Have you ever seen any of the very old series? The other week I was watching the very first series starring William Hartnell made in the 1960's. I love the suspense that those older episodes create. What are your favourite monsters btw? I think the cybermen and daleks are fantastic. The daleks are such a unique idea for a monster.
Ae you much into british comedy at all? Have you ever seen blackadder, fawlty towers, dads army, red-dwarf or even mr bean? I love all those classics myself.

Anyway if you have any questions about the UK I'd be happy to answer them.

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Postby Winston » Sat Oct 02, 2010 11:11 am

Hi Matt,
So it looks like the same powers that control the US also control the UK? I mean the "shadow government" or anglo elite.

Have you ever listened to David Icke? He's one of the most brilliant people I've ever listened to.

Creationism isn't taught in most US states, except for Tennessee. I think both theories should be taught though. Not Bible Creationism, just the intelligent design arguments.

What do most Brits think of Richard Dawkins? For an Englishman, he sounds very militant and opinionated.

I probably have a mostly positive impression of the English cause most of the ones I've met are travelers.

Is it pretty easy to meet people in pubs there?

When you say you hopped the channel, do you mean you took a ferry across the English channel? How long did that take? Is it cheaper than the underwater subway?

So the UK is like the US in that only old people and children are friendly, while people in between are stuck up, cliquish and uptight?

It's funny that it is a taboo to say that. We are only allowed to say one of two things:

1) People are so open and friendly here and wonderful!
2) I don't have time to meet people, or I lack social skills so I don't have many friends or much of a social life.

But you are NOT allowed to say "I am open and friendly, but people are stuck up, anti-social, segregated, uptight and not very open" even if it's true.

Don't you hate how truth is a taboo? Billy Joel was right when he sang this song:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0r12BP1IIDY&ob=av2n[/youtube]

Yes I'm a BIG fan of Doctor Who, both the old and new series. I like all the monsters. I haven't seen the black and white episodes for a long time. They were ok, but kind of fake by today's standards. I do like the characters though. It's too bad a lot of the black and white series episodes are missing.

I saw a few episodes of Faulty Towers. It was very over the top. I can't imagine reserved Brits acting like that.

How did you find this site?
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Postby mattyman » Mon Oct 04, 2010 11:03 pm

BellaRuth wrote:Hi Matt. I'm also 24 and from the UK.

You sound just the same as me. There's no way I'm staying here, working like a dog, to live in a tiny house and pay off debts all my life.

I want to live a more laid-back, traditional, happy life without being a wage slave. Prices of living in the UK are beyond a jpke. I know people who have worked full time their whole lives, lived modestly and are still scared they will end up on the streets.

I'm applying for a postgrad in another European country as I speak and hopefully it will go from there.

Any idea where you'd like to go?

Well my immediate plan is to get qualified as a TEFL teacher, I'm still thinking about which countries to go to, to do the course. On my short list are Spain, Czech republic and Turkey though I feel I have more investigation to do and am doing so still. This Friday I'm attending a taster course in Bournmouth. This will give me a feel for what the work would be like plus I will be able to get into contact with people who are widely experienced in the field. This, fingers crossed should help me make an informed decision. I ideally would like to go on a full 4 week CELTA course since I've heard that this would put one in the best position for landing work. I plan to do TEFL work as a means to both explore the world and fund my travelling. I am thinking about perhaps doing conservation work for the VSO in the longer term. I currently have beginner level spanish which I would like to take to the next level, though every course I've enrolled on locally has cancelled due to low numbers, which is extremely annoying. So I think it may be most viable to learn spanish in spain, since I did my spanish last year on an immersion course in Malaga. I must admit I thouroughly enjoyed the whole experience. I couldn't believer how quickly I managed to pick it up, and the people I met there were so down to earth and easy to get on with. Yes, definitely much more effective and reliable than learning spanish in the uk, definitely worth doing again. I've saved up loads of money over the past few years so I think now would be a damn good time.

Anyway, what are you studying for your postgrad btw? Have you ever studied overseas before? I have a mate who did the second year of his course in international relations in Ankara Turkey though he's doing the final year at Keel. He is also planning in the longer term to do a postgrad overseas. He had a fantastic life-changing time and met many fascinating people and saw some amazing sites, I recently met up with him for the first time in a year.

I must say, I think that the UK is a great country in general, I mean I love the counryside, thatched cottages and sunday roasts. I love traditional pubs, the kind where you can just sit and chat over a quiet drink without piped music, widescreen tvs and aggressive, zero-social-skilled lager louts in the background. Though sadly a lot of pubs, especially in urban areas have now become watering holes where people just go to get drunk. I absolutely loath the modern hyper-materialistic, hyper-shallow celebrity-obsessed 'culture' that has overtaken this country. Better not discuss it now 'cause I'll go off on a rant.

Well as for wage slavery, I have another mate who's a contract taxi driver that works seven days a week and gets a day off on average of once a month.. No, I'm not joking. He gets paid on average £100 a week, though he's technically 'self-employed'. Freedom!?

Another thing.. Do you think that people are generally more laid back and friendly in the countryside? I remember when I lived in village in somerset back in the 90s. The thing I remember most vividly was the sense of community and how everybody seemed to know each other and how friendly people seemed. I miss that a great deal. If only they would put sky-high taxes on those greedy second home owners.

Anyway, I hope you're successful in getting your postgrad. Good luck to you.
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Postby mattyman » Tue Oct 05, 2010 12:28 am

Hi Winston, thanks for your reply. I would say we definitely have a very strong 'concernsus=truth' mentality here, similar to that described in the essay about control and conformity in america. When I read that it rang so many bells. I haven't yet listened to David Icke yet, though I'll make sure I look him up on youtube by the next time I post.

I don't think that intelligent design and creationism would do any harm if taught though, but the bible variety is something that is highly questionable and yes I would agree with you on that one. Richard Dawkins seems like a bit of an athiest fanatic, though I can't really comment a lot on him 'cause I haven't seen much of his material. I don't know how popular he is among us I'm afraid.

About pubs in the UK; Ah, I was hoping I'd be asked that question. The straightest answer I can give to that question, in my opinion and experience is, no, except for middle-aged people. Traditional pubs, mainly foun in rural areas I would say are ok, but sadly that variety is dwindling. Unfortunately pubs have become in recent years a place for people to go and 'get pissed' as opposed to purely social venues. This is especially so in the town I live in. Many pubs are now frequented by drunken, antisocial yobs, have big screens, they blare piped music out and manners have deteriorated to the point that pigs would feel insulted if compared. I don't know whether you've heard about this before but the UK has got severe 'binge-drinking' problem. There is a term here we have for young women that get absolutely trashed and behave in extremely unfeminine, antisocial ways; the infamous 'ladettes'. This is a relatively recent phenomenon.

Young people generally just stick to themselves unless they are stupidly drunk, after which you can't have a decent conversation with them. Also it can be very awkward to hold conversations in those environments as there is often a highly aggressive competitive vibe in the air. Plus the fact that there is always this pressure to go out on friday and saturday nights. One thing I must add is that the types of girls that frequent bars and clubs, especially in my area do tend to be very shallow, air-headed bimbos. Oh, btw I was looking at the comparison 'cultured soulfull eyes vs. soulless empty ones' where sweet east european and asian girls are compared with plastic californian party airheads. What I will say is that the picture of the californian party girls in that article is, I hate to say, uncannilly similar to what you see in UK bars and nightclubs on friday and saturday night. There have been times where I have smiled at girls in bars and they give me dirty, sometimes downright hostile looks in return. Bear in mind, that not every town in the UK is quite this bad. I'll let you know more about the place at a later time. As for me, I have stopped frequenting bars and clubs since it feels like a waste of time and money, damage to health, acheives absolutely nothing, has no positive developmental function, damages your health and is, from my point of view a social dead end.

All in all' I'd definitely say without a doubt that young people here are a f@cking unnapproachable lot. Most of them seem to lack personality and seem to need a completely different set of social skills than most other people. So yeah, the teens and 20's are definitely the most difficult to get to know people there are. I have definitely found mainland european, Indian and Thai young people a completely different kettle of fish in this respect. I used to work with a lovely Indian girl. There are a few other guys in my age group that feel similarly to me about the social environment, including my brother.

Anyway, I found this site when I was randomly googling once when I discovered the article about 6 major advantages of european/russian women in the search results, thought that looked interesting; not the sort of thing you find normally on google and I discovered your site. I'm glad I discovered this site anyway. I certainly feel far less alone now than I did before I discovered it. It feels really good to know that there are so many people out there in my boat and who feel the same way that I do about the anglo-american workoholic consumer culture and social environment, and who have similar goals to me. Thank goodness we have the internet.
re matt
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Postby BellaRuth » Tue Oct 05, 2010 5:49 pm

Bournemouth ay? I visited it last summer, went to Swanage as well, pretty place. I used to live in Cornwall but am now in the Midlands.

Yes, get CELTA. I have a TEFL qualification and after completing it I found out no one would employ me (apart from very far-flung places that couldn't care less) because CELTA is the only one that gets taken seriously.

I'm learning Spanish too, I learn it through Livemocha. It's a free way to learn languages (LOADS of choices) and you might be able to meet up with people through it too.

I'm thinking of doing something along the lines of Fine Art, somewhere like Barcelona, but I went to uni today and was told I might be better off spending my time setting myself up as an artist rather than forking out for a Masters, so let's see. But i definitely want to emigrate.

An immersion course sounds fantastic, as does the conservation work. I've been thinking of conservation volunteering too (I've done some in the UK) but they're all in hot countries and I burn at a lightbulb being turned on. I bet it would be a great experience.

I had a friend who did law at Keele! No I've not studied abroad before, I wanted to do an Erasmus but got in too late (didn't hear about it until halfway through my 2nd year).

mattyman wrote:I absolutely loath the modern hyper-materialistic, hyper-shallow celebrity-obsessed 'culture' that has overtaken this country. Better not discuss it now 'cause I'll go off on a rant.


Me too. I don't even drink (apart from the odd glass of wine with a meal). I don't go 'out' at night cos there's just drunk people everywhere and a horrible atmosphere. Last time I went out for a friend's birthday a chav built like a rugby player (female) decided she wanted to hit my friend for no reason. The night was spent trying to hide from the nutter. Sigh.

And celebrity magazines. I look at them and think, who buys this crap?

I also don't like feeling out of it, as if people think I'm not having fun or being young. I just don't want to waste my life on nonsense.

On the jobs issue... I have a fairly good CV, I think, for my age and situation. I've volunteered, worked as much as I can through my studies since I left school, etc. I have been unemployed since FEBRUARY. I took a year out from uni thinking I could save up some money. I have applied to part time, full time, everything, incliding Macdonalds and Subway. Nothing but tumbleweed. Thank goodness I'm going back to uni for my final year. I'm terrified of what will happen when I graduate this summer. I think I have better prospects abroad, at least working in a cafe- nowhere is worse than here, and you don't have the good quality of life here anymore either.

Another thing.. Do you think that people are generally more laid back and friendly in the countryside? I remember when I lived in village in somerset back in the 90s. The thing I remember most vividly was the sense of community and how everybody seemed to know each other and how friendly people seemed. I miss that a great deal. If only they would put sky-high taxes on those greedy second home owners.


Totally. I was born in a tiny village with cockerels and sheep and old fashioned houses. Then I moved to the very west of Cornwall for 10 years. I'm so used to the countryside and the laid-back rural life. I was forced out of Cornwall by second-home owners from London buying up all the property and not living there for at least half the year... the place is like Mars, it's empty, no employment, nowhere to live. Really depressing. So I moved near Birmingham where my sister is. I am having a real hard time adjusting. It's like another world. I can't wait to get out
:)
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Postby Winston » Wed Oct 20, 2010 6:04 am

Matt,
It seems that Englishmen who visit America find out that Englishwomen are better by comparison. Check out this story of such a case:

http://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=7976

What do you think?

Also, maybe you can give your take on this thread about feminine elegant English girls here?

http://www.happierabroad.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=8827
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Postby london » Wed Oct 20, 2010 10:41 am

hello from London
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Postby Marcus Aurelius » Wed Oct 20, 2010 7:28 pm

I'm not so sure about that, Winston. We have some english guys that write on the Happy Bachelors forum and they have nothing good to say about British women. He's posted all kinds of articles and commentaries about how they are always drunk, rude and abrasive. I think to find a good white girl you are going to have to go totally outside of the west. Russia, Ukraine, Norway...things like this. I'd be curious to hear about places like Spain though. I don't really know anything about their women. This was one of his links, and my reply on HB to the article.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... l#comments

"That article was a great find. +1. I love reading stuff like this. I think it's great america ranked in at number two because you would consider america and the uk to be the pulse of the West. And there my friends, is the state of our women for you. Haha.

But guys, men are waking the f**k up. That is the point. More and more western men are realizing that their women have f***ed themselves into oblivion, and guess what, no one cares anymore! As the writer on nomarriage said "they have priced themselves out of the market." Those are CHOICE WORDS BECAUSE IT IS NOW A GLOBAL MARKET. It is with the economy, so let it be with women. Did any of you gents read down? Check out one of the comments a guy wrote...this is priceless:

"When I was younger and used to go to bars and nightclubs, I used to find the women (British) were incredibly obnoxious and would tear any poor bloke apart who dared to chat them up. They only seemed to go out in order to humiliate guys, but in those days, there wasn't any other option but to go and suffer the same ordeal week after week. It always struck me that British women despised their menfolk, whereas a lot of foreign women actually valued a British gentleman. Now, thanks to globalisation, cheap airfares, the increase in working abroad, and immigration you see a lot more British guys with Asian(Chinese, Japanese and Indian), European and USA/AUS women than in previous years. These same British women are still waiting in the pubs and clubs, ready to give the guys a tongue lashing, but unfortunately the guys are not bothering with them any more. Why would they when they can bypass these dragons completely and get a much more attractive girlfriend abroad?"

I love the part where he says "British women are still waiting in the pubs.." I wanted to applaud in my seat. I think women are simply too f***ing stupid to realize what is going on. I see this HERE when I was going to bars and clubs. Men don't even try to approach women hardly anymore...just the pua's and some idiots. They are just sitting there, getting drunker and drunker, and grinding on themselves...while the men show no interest, or watch them as if they are zoo animals. Whether you import or export for foreign women is besides the point here, what this guy wrote is just an illustration...these bitches have given men so much shit...and the men...are disappearing.

With articles like this popping up on MAINSTREAM PUBLICATIONS like the dailymail....by proxy...gentlemen..I think it is only a matter of time before even more men start to wake up. I call pieces like this RAISING AWARENESS"

Read more: http://happybachelor.proboards.com/inde ... z12vedh56s
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Postby BellaRuth » Wed Oct 20, 2010 8:40 pm



Very depressing article. I do want to point out three things though:

1. The reputation of the Daily Mail
2. The source poll itself
3. The other comments people left in addition to the one you pointed out. Mostly people seemed to be acknowledging the reason for this stereotype and that they were annoyed all Brits are tarred with the same brush. We are aware of what foreigners think of us due to the 'chav' and 'ladette' influences and the people who go getting drunk, violent, etc. in popular cheap destinations like Spain and Greece. We realise these people exist in a large part of the population. But to say this is what all British women are like might be pretty inaccurate.
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