That's why I don't understand! If I like a girl and I'm talking to more than one, I would choose the one who makes me feel great most of the time, and keeps my interest. I don't know about you guys, but based on that criteria, it was easy as pie to choose one person.Renata wrote:what an awful situation for those women to be in .. how stupid can they be ... obviously if you're smart you would choose either of the two.
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get two separate memory cards for you camera & while you're at it, different sim cards too; in case one calls while you're with the other one ... lol you guys are such fun to read about My brother was kind enough to give me the FYI' on guys growing up. I would have to say he did well by me since I've never fell into any traps, love triangles, married men or bad boys. I spot them from the time I meet them. Good luck Winston & safe trip.
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On our site Chrisitan Filipina we encourage our members to meet first just as friends. We suggest that they should not become financially or emotionally involved with anyone they have not yet in person. We suggest that they plan to visit the Philippines, and just meet around 5 ladies as friends first. When the men ask us, "Is that ok?", we reassure them that it is not only ok but it is the only smart way to do it. If the ladies ask for an explanation, the man should explain that it is the specific suggestion of Christian Filipina's owners. After meeting several ladies as friends only in public, then we encourage the men to be more open to following up with just one of them.
We believe that ultimately if you bring honesty into a relationship that you will be less insecure with who you are; we also believe that if you choose wisely and act respectfully, then you will be rewarded with commitment, stability, and generosity. I understand that many of the posting men at happier abroad seem to say they embrace a flower sniffing approach to ladies so I am not sure if our advice is helpful to you or not.
That's good advice Peter.
When your clients do that though, meet 5 ladies and are open and honest about it with them, how do the ladies usually respond? Don't they get angry or jealous when they find out that their guy is visiting other women too?
I don't think I'd have the guts to be open about that. It just looks bad to tell them that directly. If I were a girl, I wouldn't want to know about it either.
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"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne
That is what we recommend, and we think it is only effective if the gentleman is clear from the beginning (with himself and the ladies) that he is starting off slow and just meeting friends in person. On the other hand, if the gentleman leads the ladies each on separately, that's when it would lead to uncomfortable feelings and jealousy. We think that if a man is looking for a relationship he can count on for the long-term, he has to start off on the right foot with honesty.
We have many members who ignore our advice, fall in love before meeting in person, then get married, and now they're happily married.
Our site: Christian Filipina Dating
Winston you Chinese guys just crack me up. My Chinese landlord is always asking me for pointers on how to get some SIDE p***y. He knows the black guys have swag. I need to start charging you guys for real. Now like the other posters have said just tell them. Do not lie be real. Hell even tell a few of them that you are f***ing other women. They will offer you p***y more just to get you to stop f***ing the others.
Women are easy to be played if you know how.
Truth women are way more competitive then men, sex and love are no differant. If a women thinks she is your only option you will be in the friend zone in no time. Using your feet and walking away from one woman in the direction of another is like an on switch to their sex drive...
"Never underestimate the predictability of stupidity"!!!
Great advice, thanks. Will check out your site.
Whether you do it ChristianFilipna's way, or you do it Erk's way, the bottlm line is, women like competition, and they adore honesty.
When I was dating two women at the same time they BOTH tried getting "angry and upset" about that. So what?
Why should I care if women are PRETENDING to be "angy and upset" so as to dominate and control me?
Women do not care when men KILL THEMSELVES from criminal abuse from a woman.
Why should men care when women are PRETENDING to be "angry and upset"?
If was WOMEN who HATED on us first. I am far above women and will not hate them in return...but I sure as hell will not let them dominate me and control me via lies and manipulation any more either. And women LOVE that I am willing to say that out loud. Male indifference to female manipulation and control is one of the BIGGEST turn ons for women. Women really HATE men that they can dominate and control. They like it up front because it gives them the buzz of "power" but over time they come to HATE the man.
Example. My fav#1 was telling me one day how her second husband was weak willed and had to be told what to do and was like a "sack of potatoes" that she had to push around everywhere...she described him as a "burden"...
So I said to her words to the effect... "I am sure he was like that when you met him and when you were dating him. And I am sure you felt "powerful" that you were able to push him around and manipulate him. I bet you tried to manipulate him and dominate him and control him just like you have tried with me, only I will not allow you to do that with me. Your problem is you liked the feeling of "power" that you got from dominating and controlling a man. But what you hated was you ended up with a man you HAD to dominate and control. You picked the sort of man you would inevitably come to dislike and disrespect. Your choice. Your responsibility."
You could almost see the light go on. She suddenly "got" that she chooses men and then tries to dominate and control them. Then she only selects the men who CAN be dominated and controlled by her emotional manipulation....and, of course, she ends up with men who NEED to be dominated and controlled.
She tried this in our time dating and my response was simply to upgrade a prospective woman to "fav#3" and tell fav#1 all about her. She got "angry and upset" but she got the message and she FOUGHT HARDER for my time and attention for 10 months. As did fav#3 trying to win me away from fav#1.
It was a lovely time and I will never forget it. Fav#3 has moved on now....fav#1 is reconsidering that which was the basis of our split...my refusal to have more children....you can be assured that I have made it clear to her that I will never be monogmous again and that if she wants to be in my life that is part of the deal. Apart from that? I am perfectly happy to remain single.
Winston...you need to learn that it is the MAN who is the prize and the WOMAN who is the predator for the prize.
Women do NOT want men to know this.
The question men need to ask women they are interested in is this.
"what do you offer a man like me"?
Of all the women I have asked that question of only fav#3 gave a sensible answer. Try it for yourself. Ask women what they have to offer...99%+ of the time they will have no answer. If they can not articulate what they have to offer? Why would you entertain their "offer"?
Women like to tell the lie that "any man would be lucky to have a woman like me". And it is a lie. I have found that women have very little to offer a man like me, so little that when asked they can not even articulate a sensible list. How about that?
Erik is absolutely spot on. Before I was divorced I did my best to make my marriage work and gave my wife far too many opportunities....and I refused to "play" her. I wanted to be honest with her and not make her "upset and angry" by manipulating her. I was a beta, loser, smuck. So I know what one of those looks like.
As I slowly made my way from beta to alpha and learned more about women by dating more of them and observing them more closely I got to understand women far better...remember..I was 20 when I started dating Jennifer and I had no sisters...so I was lied to very successfully by all around me about women and how to deal with women. Since everyone was telling me the same lies it sounded like the truth to me, an inexperienced young man.
But as a 45/46 year old and watching women very closely it was no longer possible for them to get away with the same lies and hypocrisy. And now I am sharing how women manipulate men in the free ebook in my sig.
Not long after I made it to alpha...and I admit I had training wheels on....I started to see the MASSIVE difference in how women responded to me when I was in alpha mode versus beta mode. It is VERY different. Even the SAME women respond VERY differently.
In those days I would slip between high beta and low alpha when spending time with fav#1. Her responses to me were VASTLY different depending on how I was being at any given time. When I was being beta she would be more domineering and controlling. When I was being alpha she would be vastly more deferential to me. It took me a while to wake up to this. Since my wife was domineering and controlling during our whole 23 years together I did not even notice that is what it was. It was "normal"...and all the women around her let her get away with it....hell men and women alike socialise men to accept domineering and controlling from women. It is called "man up" and "be a man" and "you have to do what it takes to keep your wife happy". This is all domineering and controlling the man.
So....when I met other women I started "playing" them a bit...it was childs play....so much so that I got tired of it inside a year and do not bother doing that any more...I just "tell them like it is" and tell them they can always go find some other man if they are not interested in me....that simple.....
Now that I know women FAR better than I did 4 years ago? I have lost 90% of my interest in them. Women are SO FAKE that it is just not funny. The problem women have with lying to men all our lives is that when we wake up and come to realise who much we have been lied to men like me find women very unappealing and unattractive. How could I be expected to be attracted to people I know have lied to my fellow men all their lives?
This is why I hope fav#1 changes her mind on kids.....as far as I am aware she is the only honest woman I know who is a prospect for me. I have two close women friends I really like whom I would think are honest but they are both married. Good luck to their husbands!!
women only "adore honesty" in men because it gives them control over the man. Women themselves know they are liars and they know they lie a great deal of the time. Women simply are not honest people in the main. And I mean 99.9%. Shopenhauers essay on women makes this quite clear that this has been known for a long time.
one of the issues women like yourself and the women who are your clients face is how badly chrisitian women in the west treat christian men. A christian man like me takes the immediate position that if a woman calls herself "christian" she is already very suspect of hypocrisy.
Why would I say that? My wife loudly proclaimed her christianty in our time as teens and in our dating period and in our early marriage. But she renounced her religion soon after our son was baptised. NONE of my christian sisters helped me when I asked for help to bring her back to our religion. NONE of my christian sisters helped me when I asked for help with my children whom my wife now refused to raise in the christian faith.
In divorce ALL of my so called "christian sisters" supported this woman who was a criminal child abuser non christian over me the loving christian father.
Indeed, I have recently served a notice on the Pope that he is doing his religion a great dis-service and is himself a hypocrite for not speaking up about the issues that Christian men face in being hated on by christian women in divorce...and I mean the women AROUND the wife, not the wife herself.
MUSLIM women, on the other hand, will denounce a muslim woman who abuses her husband, will denounce a muslim woman who does not raise her children in the faith she married in.
When christian women and muslim women are compared for how much they value their religion over and above how much they like to be able to get away with crimes Christian women come a very poor second. Indeed, christian women are nowhere in that comparison. Christian women claim that other christian women have a "right" to renounce the religion they married in, break their wedding vows, break their vows at baptism, criminally abuse their husbands and make off with his children. That OTHER christian women do not denounce this behaviour and ensure it does not happen among their own peers is a warning bell for any man considering any christian woman be she from the west of from a place like the philippines.
It is well time that Christian women stopped supporting such actions of other fallen women. It is giving christian woman a bad name to be doing so...and I am telling every young men I can that christian women are far lower quality in general because of these things I describe.
Here is a suggestion.
Why dont you get a whole lot of christian women to send a lawful notice to the pope and have the women sign a petition with the notice and tell the pope that you expect him to make the statement that a christian man who is being criminally attacked and having his family destroyed against his will should be supported by his christian sisters and not attacked by them. Why not do that?
After all. The phillipines is a very catholic country. You have every right to ask the pope to voice your concerns about how so many christian men are being treated....he is certainly not listing to ex-christian men like me. Doing such things as speaking out against the abuse of christian men in the west would do more to establish the credibility of christian women in the philippines than any assurances you are attempting to give men about your clients.
Further...what we are doing in the west is proposing to woman that they create all women courts and all women juries so that a man who is criminally victimised by a woman can gain a path to justice without being called a "woman hater" as is the case today. If christian women in the phillipines are so good then you could set up the same so that men from the west marrying and moving to the phillipines can be confident that if their wife criminally abuses them, as so many of us have had happen in the west, that the other women will actually defend them so they do not have to defend themselves.
Doing THAT sort of thing will buy you a LOT of credibility. In the phillipines the effects of CDAW are already being felt. And there are many men in the west who see that it is only a matter of time before even women in places like the phillipines become just as horrible and man-hating as women in the west are now.
I am sorry to hear that your ex disrespected her vows, commitment, morality, and took advantage of you, and that her "friends" encouraged her to do so. I remember first reading The Myth of Male Power by Warren Farrell and at that time I was surprised by it but saw that the points were correct.
I appreciate your suggestion but am not blessed with enough time or the appreciation for religious authority to take on the project you suggest.
It seems that in your experience and mine, that claiming to be Christian is not in and of itself a necessary or sufficient basis for choosing a partner. On our site we have to reject a lot of member applications from men and women who say they are Christian and may believe it, but who we feel are not the kind of people we would like to present to friends in our living room.
It is a common subject to consider whether the "liberation" and multiple sexual partners that was popularized alongside in the 60s etc is a contributing factor to the higher incidence of divorce etc. On this forum I often see a worship of this same liberation attitude, and I do wonder sometimes whether that becomes part of the problem itself in a vicious circle, liberation and the need for liberation each fueling each other. What do you think?
Our site: Christian Filipina Dating