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How Do You Guys Deal with Loneliness?

Ask questions and get advice, or share advice. Disclaimer: Any advice you take here is at your own risk. We are not liable for any consequences you might incur from following someone's advice here.
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Re: How Do You Guys Deal with Loneliness?

Postby Falcon » Mon Jul 25, 2016 5:22 pm

There are plenty of lonely people out there too. Connect with folks like this who would be truly thankful for your presence. Make it mutually beneficial. Happiness comes by giving your love and time to those in need - not necessarily your money.

Instead of wallowing in self-pity, it's better to have an open heart. The Buddha taught this as well. This is what he meant by non-self and compassion.

Please read Ladislav's foster child story, for instance.
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Re: How Do You Guys Deal with Loneliness?

Postby Ghost » Tue Jul 26, 2016 5:47 am

I just pray for the meteor to come.
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Re: How Do You Guys Deal with Loneliness?

Postby Winston » Mon Aug 01, 2016 11:00 pm

USA_luxury_prison wrote:
Winston wrote:Here is a classic oldie song from the 70's dedicated to lonely people called "Lonely People" by America. It's a great classic with nice words. I guess even in the 70's, there were lonely people to dedicate this too, though probably not as many as today.

Another classic hit song dedicated to lonely people is called "Piano Man" by Billy Joel. Listen to the lyrics. They are good and talk about how lonely people are at bars drinking off their loneliness, pain and regret. That's the sad life of America, especially with no human connection in a society where no one cares about you.


So all this chaos and loneliness in America has been around for quite some time? When do you think things in America started to go downhill? What do you think is the main thing that caused people to suffer this loneliness here in America? I haven't done my research as much as you that's why I ask.


Yeah it seems like it. Even for young women in the 70's, there was loneliness. For instance, check out this female song and classic oldie called "At Seventeen" by Janis Ian. Here are the lyrics.

http://www.metrolyrics.com/at-seventeen-lyrics-janis-ian.html

"I learned the truth at seventeen
That love was meant for beauty queens
And high school girls with clear skinned smiles
Who married young and then retired
The valentines I never knew
The Friday night charades of youth
Were spent on one more beautiful
At seventeen I learned the truth

And those of us with ravaged faces
Lacking in the social graces
Desperately remained at home
Inventing lovers on the phone
Who called to say - come dance with me
And murmured vague obscenities
It isn't all it seems at seventeen

A brown eyed girl in hand me downs
Whose name I never could pronounce
Said - pity please the ones who serve
They only get what they deserve
The rich relationed hometown queen
Marries into what she needs
With a guarantee of company
And haven for the elderly

So remember those who win the game
Lose the love they sought to gain
In debentures of quality and dubious integrity
Their small-town eyes will gape at you
In dull surprise when payment due
Exceeds accounts received at seventeen

To those of us who knew the pain
Of valentines that never came
And those whose names were never called
When choosing sides for basketball
It was long ago and far away
The world was younger than today
When dreams were all they gave for free
To ugly duckling girls like me

We all play the game, and when we dare
We cheat ourselves at solitaire
Inventing lovers on the phone
Repenting other lives unknown
That call and say - come on, dance with me
And murmur vague obscenities
At ugly girls like me, at seventeen

Songwriters
Ian, Janis

Read more: Janis Ian - At Seventeen Lyrics | MetroLyrics"

Here is the song on YouTube. It has a very sad melancholy tune that will make you feel like you want to cry.

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Re: How Do You Guys Deal with Loneliness?

Postby Lorenzo » Tue Aug 02, 2016 3:39 am

I'm not clear your problem simply goes away by moving to another country. That said, if you meet the right SE Asian lady she will probably be quite "clingy" and you will no longer know loneliness in the same away. Even if you are ugly you will be getting laid as much as you can handle. Remember this, because all the trips to Europe will only frustrate you more.

I suffered isolation and loneliness after divorce, but trips to SE Asia made me a new man. I found my smile again and a new energy and I was getting laid a minimum of 3-4 times per day. When I came back to the USA meeting women became easier. Those SE Asian ladies will build your confidence and renew your soul, which at this time sounds damaged.
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Re: How Do You Guys Deal with Loneliness?

Postby Eric » Tue Aug 02, 2016 3:52 am

I read about God. I pray, talk to him. I'm never lonely; but always satisfied. You're never lonely, with God.
-"Virescit vulnere virtus"
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Re: How Do You Guys Deal with Loneliness?

Postby Winston » Wed Aug 10, 2016 6:13 am

Don't you guys hate it when you're lonely in the US, and when you go out you get no social interaction except when the cashier at the store says, "Here's your change. Have a great day."? lol Doesn't that suck? And doesn't it suck when you feel POWERLESS to do anything about it?

Don't you guys hate it when you want to travel or take a road trip around the US, but there's no one to travel with or everyone you know has to work? So you know it will be a lonely experience because traveling around the US alone is a lonely experience because all around you are couples, groups and families, thus making you feel out of place.

Don't you hate feeling lonely all the time but have no one to talk to about it? Even most friends can't talk about that because it's a taboo subject that no one wants to hear. And no one dares to admit that they are lonely. I am beginning to think that maybe some people don't get lonely, only some do, like us. Some people seem to not need social connection and will say so if you ask them.

Don't you hate it when you want to eat at a restaurant because you miss its good food, but you have no one to go with, and you know that if you enter alone, you will look like a loser? Waiters usually will look confused or puzzles as they say, "Table for one?"
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

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"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
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Re: How Do You Guys Deal with Loneliness?

Postby starchild5 » Wed Aug 10, 2016 8:59 am

I never felt lonely only horny :lol:

Otherwise, I would not even interact with women except when i get aroused. If you really appreciate nature and god's creations around you. You really do not feel lonely.

...For me Knowledge is king...I always do some stuff that enhance my knowledge,and never felt lonely.

I don't even feel like I need parents, siblings, friends, women...Just leave me alone...I have so much going on in my mind all the time...

Only issue is...I GET BORED...so I need to do somethings constantly....That's why I don't like India, not much to do...Wish to be in Thailand soon...so much do just by yourself...True freedom is in Thailand and Philippines...You can be lonely and yet not feel like it
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Re: How Do You Guys Deal with Loneliness?

Postby Hero » Wed Aug 10, 2016 10:57 am

Eric wrote:I read about God. I pray, talk to him. I'm never lonely; but always satisfied. You're never lonely, with God.

So why did God say in Genesis that "It is not good for the man to be alone"? Adam was living in fellowship was God, so he wasn't really alone; yet God saw the need to make a companion for Adam. It's great to have a relationship with God but you also need friends at your own level. It's like little kids needing friends their own age, even if they have parents who love them.
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Re: How Do You Guys Deal with Loneliness?

Postby Winston » Fri Nov 04, 2016 9:29 am

Short video about why we're lonely and also why the more complex your mind is, the more lonely you will be as a price to pay for complexity. So true huh?

Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
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Re:

Postby Eric » Sun Nov 06, 2016 4:06 pm

bennandsarah wrote:i started pursuing hobbies i've always had an interest in -- model railroading for example -- that keeps me busy and less worried about lonliness. also i've admitted my lack of poontang to my female friends. they are helping me. one wants me to move to charlotte NC -- where she lives -- she's talking me up to her single friends and already has dates lined up for me. i've found fuk being alpha -- being real is what life is all about.



This. I sure hope this is true. I've been living in China now for almost 5 months, and, despite their being loads and loads of amazing and gorgeous women, people in general and food, etc., my social life, dating life and sex basically seem non existant. ..I'm working my ass off most the time, and so don't have time or energy or resources to go out and meet people. Also, I hold people at a distance, I could really get laid a lot, but somethings holding me back still. Its like I'm waiting.
With that said, through the grime I see America as basically toxic in every way, I don't look forward to going back there - I wonder if I will "slip back" to where I was. And this is a horrible thought. I have to think I won't, I hope not.

Fix yourself first, then blame the outside world. I'm finding the real me brcause I had become a shell of a person and blocked who I was. There's usually something going on with you. Even in America you should be able to get some, although less or being poorer quality. how I thought or saw the world was messed up, making me hate constantly everybody and try and control everything...so I withdrew, having no fun and this was my unhappy existance for most of my miserable life; for a very long time. I felt it extreme importance to control at the expense of flexibility, openness. ... it's also why I didnt get laid, talk to people or have friends. Or a normal life. So, Im changing now, I can already feel the worlds a huge reservoir full to the brim of experiences, that I can y handle.
No problem. It just seems alnost like too much for me- And that's whats holding me back. Although the time is coming.

It really is a great, and mysterious feeling. Im not constantly negative all of the time, and I'm not an island...I'm hopeful and optimistic about the future. I am reaching on experiencing life. Now.
Last edited by Eric on Sun Nov 06, 2016 10:41 pm, edited 4 times in total.
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