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Here's my situation: I have no experience living abroad. I have lived in my parents' house ever since I was born (I am now 28. *Yes*, I know). I am a very private person, don't make many friends easily, most of the friends I've had were exchange students in college and they have gone back to their respective countries, so I am left here with a couple of people I hang out with but would not really consider to be close friends. I am very attached to my parents and my sister, we share most of the same interests and values, so it's easy to do a lot of stuff with them. We connect very well. My sister moved abroad (around 7 hours away by plane) last year, and it was very hard for me and my parents (and her, I'm sure).
I've been given the opportunity to work on my dream job, in actually my dream city. The only problem is: it's literally the other side of the globe. Literally. I've been selected together with a handful of other people to send CV and Portfolio to apply for the job. I believe I have a very good CV and Portfolio and so, a very good chance to get one of the 4 placements. But I am SO confused that I don't know what to do. I can't even begin to think what it would be to be so far away from my parents. I don't know what's going to be like for them to have both their children so far away. I feel kind of guilty, really sad and confused right now, I don't know if I should apply or not.
If I don't do very well living so far away, I would only be able to come back 6 months later. Plus, it's a totally different language and I don't have any experience with it... granted, if I get the job, I get training in my field and in the language, and it is not exactly needed to do the job.
I feel really scared and a really weird mix of emotions: I am excited, scared and sad at the same time.
Should I just do it? I'm terribly scared of getting depressed for being so far and actually hindering my life there, but there's no career in this field where I live, so if I don't try I will get stuck for a few more years doing jobs I don't really enjoy.
Anyone ever been in a similar situation? Any advice would be amazing...
Thanks in advance!
6 months isn't the rest of your life, it's a opportunity to see the person you never thought you could be, in a environment that has no good or bad expectations for you, it allows you to mature more as a person
I'm 28, and I live with my parents, I've gone to china twice, it will change your perspective and how you feel about your self to get out of your safe zone and home.
Even if you ended up coming home, you'd have a story to tell and a experience you didn't before, and how knows you might even meet a girl along the way.
It's going to feel weird maybe even scare you, but these are all healthy good things, one should do something they're scared of if it ends with them being a better person with a broader experience!
Do it, and don't look back, only look forward.
I would have to agree with the other magnum, take the opportunity. I am kind of envious of you for getting the chance to go abroad. I am happy for you, too. Congratulations!! Other posters here have said you could set up skype to communicate to your parents. I am not sure how to set that up on the computer, though.
@magnum Thank you, that's kind of what I think to myself. But I often get drowned by the other thoughts, my head's been a mess lately.
@?????? Thank you! My parents use Skype to work, so they're all set. We also use it to talk to my sister. Thanks for the kind words!
@abcdavid01 Maybe that's what I "subconsciously" want to hear... maybe it will motivate me further.
Hey what a cool opportunity! You don't have anything to lose! Maybe your family can even come and visit you! I say go for it.
Go for it, Rampage! The biggest risk of all is never taking one. If you pass up this opportunity, you may regret it for the rest of your life.
A quote from Teddy Roosevelt comes to mind:
"Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much because they live in the gray twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat."
@pete98146 Thank you for the encouraging words!
@Hero Thanks! That helps
@Ghost Well, sorry I was feeling confused and needed some motivational words.
I'm sure I opened this thread while subconsciously knowing that would be sending my CV. I just needed the extra push, and it helped! Plus, my family is being very supportive and keeping me motivated, I am working on updating my CV and Portfolio right now to send them as soon as possible. I'm feeling really excited about it right now, hope I luck out!
BTW it's 6 months minimum.
I wish you the best of luck! International travel can be very hit or miss. Some of us take to it like a duck takes to water whereas others can't accept the cultural changes. You even see it here on the forum where guys have lived abroad but all they do is complain about the heat, pollution, differences compared to back home. It's very difficult to know which side of the coin you'll find yourself on until you actually go over and experience.
You need to mentally prepare yourself now because it WILL BE DIFFERENT. You will experience culture shock. If I were you, I'd even try to find some sights were you can meet some friends online in advance. The more integrated you become in activities, the more you'll enjoy the assignment.
When travelling abroad, you get out of it what you put into it. Meaning you can't sit around your apartment like a homesick puppy and expect to get the most out of your trip. You need to get out and see the city, experience the culture, stay positive, flirt with girls, be positive and accepting of others. Also, remember that you are a guest in their country. If things go foul (and they will) you need to stay patient and polite. I remember sitting in a bar in the Philippines and this German guy sits next to me and asks me "what are you drinking?" I said Heiniken. So this complete stranger bought me a beer. Guess what? Now he's not a stranger and we talked for an hour and had a blast. He taught me a good lesson. That's the type of guy that you want to be!!!!!!! Have fun, talk to old ladies who sell the food, get to know their names. Little things like this will make it much more fun.
A lot of this is common sense or corny but you'd be surprised how many "Ugly Americans" are out there overseas. Don't be one of those guys!!!!
Again, good luck and keep us posted!
Last edited by pete98146 on January 28th, 2014, 8:56 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Thank you very much for your advice. Right now, I'm only worried about finishing compiling my portfolio and sending the application. Then I have to wait for the answer!
I'll be honest by saying I don't care much for my own country's culture (with no offense to anyone out here, it just doesn't "click" with me), I always felt like I was born in the wrong place. I love the chinese culture, I've investigated it thoroughly in college and on my own free time during most of my life. I looked at videos from people living there from abroad, I always wanted to experience that. Now it actually became a possibility and it just hit me hard and scared me. But I can't let this opportunity pass up! I also can't get my hopes up too much, as there is a chance I could not be accepted. We'll see how that goes. So yeah, I think I will fit in, but I could be wrong! I can only answer that when I am out and about and experiencing it!
I left home at 18, it was the best thing I've ever done.
I'm living with my family now, it's a nightmare of dogs, cats and spoilt kids.
I went to Asia for 10 months and all I missed about England was the food. I made loads of new friends in Asia, from wacky expats to cute girls. Oh, and I also met a few guys from the board.
So yeah, go for it.
Thanks for the encouragement xiongmao!
I'll definitely miss some of the food here, but I absolutely love chinese food! I eat chinese food every week, more than once, so that is also something I'm excited for (if I get to go of course).
Just finished updating my portfolio and CV, tomorrow I will send them! The next few weeks will feel like an eternity!