Ask questions and get advice, or share advice. Disclaimer: Any advice you take here is at your own risk. We are not liable for any consequences you might incur from following someone's advice here.
Note: Before posting your question, do a search for it in the Google Search box at the top to see if it's already been addressed.
So guys, I may be able to visit Ho Chi Minh City either this year in Christmas or next year in spring break. If my mom honors her promises, she will allow me to travel on my own once I get into a miserable Canadian university. A few girls are already out of the game, or at least for the first visit (I will refer to them by their screen names from www.vietnameselove.com):
gwendolinepink (18)-when I first met her on that site she told me she was going to a military/patriotic education camp for 3 weeks. We talked on and off during those 3 weeks that she was busy, and after she went home I expected her to talk more with me. She was still busy. It's obvious that she isn't even interested in me because she told me to stop sending SMS messages, and that she wants a guy who is "rich, smart, successful on job. No need handsome, handsome not help me." I asked her some questions on whether she was a spiritual person, what she thought was the meaning of life etc. Refused to answer. Do you think she's intimidated by these kinds of deep questions? (AKA sign of immaturity)-she's a Japanese major in her 1st year of university
#She said that I'm childish just because I haven't entered university. WTF??? Also, I asked her whether she enjoyed the cmap. I said such a highly controlled and structured lifestyle would be painful for me. She said, "yes! So fun! My friends hug me to sleep each night!"..... (she's still a girl)
nhjcrazj / ho thao (22)-Very moral, honorable retreat. She told me she decided on a local guy that was her younger sister's ex, and that "I don't think it is right to talk to you when I am thinking of someone else. I will delete you now." This proves her loyalty. Perhaps it is because she's older and has less BS.
vothithuytrang123 / Ashley Vo (16): I may go to Da Nang next year and visit her. Cute girl.
pham kim nguyen (23): not from that website, but she's a good friend of hoang anh who met me from VNlove.com. Not too outstanding in terms of looks but is fun and intelligent. Works as an English teacher in Dong Nai, which I may not be able to visit this time but maybe next time. She's actually interested in learning Chinese!^^
chi e (22): Not too attracted to her. Good thing, she's a Christian.
tinabear (22): She may be busy, so I may not be able to see her. She isn't interested in a romantic relationship, so even if I see her, we will be just as good friends.
Chi Le (26): Maybe a bit too old? Not too attractive either. She may be in Singapore or her hometown.
MinaLuu (20): Don't know if she's going to be in HCMC in Christmas, so I guess I'll just call her off this time.
jyshee/Kim Vo (20): I've only talked to her like 4 times?
Who I Would Like To Meet For Sure:
Alice (21)-Quite pretty, really nice. Had video chat with her once and she likes to smile. However, she's busy as hell with university work (economics major), or is she just ignoring me on WeChat? (the last time she replied to my messages was April 4th)
ThiHua (19)-Chinese-Vietnamese with parents from HK/Guangdong. She's the cute and sweet type. Cares a lot about me. Warned me about Viet girls taking advantage of foreigners. She can cook, sew. Doesn't want to be in a relationship with me until we've actually met.
Rose (19)-Ermmm not too pretty, but she's nice. Likes Western music and movies. Works as a promotion girl for a company selling baby products. Also warned me about gold digging Vietnamese women. Likes shopping for clothes and dresses. She works until 5 or 6 PM each day so I can only meet her during evenings.
Vi Phuong Doan (20)-Again, not too pretty but a bit cute. English major (explains her superb English skills). Knows a lot about Western music, movies, even Russell Peters lol.
hoang anh (24)-She's in Tay Ninh, but said that she can visit me in HCMC easily. Fun and intelligent, average looks. She may think I'm a bit young for her though
thuyvo20 (21)-She's basically a slut. Lost her virginity at age 16 to an American more than twice her age. Broke up with him after 8 months, then dated another American working in HCMC as an English teacher. Also had a Vietnamese BF. Personality (along with English skills) is crap, gives "Yes", "No", "Oh", "Ok" as responses. Deep insecurity issues. "Where are you?" and "what are you doing?" are like the only 2 things she asks me. I stopped talking to her for a while and sent her a text telling her how slutty she is. Apparently she became emotional about it and said "I still love you" and all that shit. I was foolish enough to give her a second chance (I'm too compassionate/soft). Yesterday she said "if you think of other girl, I will kill you".
I actually don't really want to meet her, and I'd be more than happy if she ditched me now. That's one less to think about for me..... Oh well, if I do end up seeing her, I will see how she behaves in real life.
X-Woman=I haven't found her, but she will be Thuy's replacement. This spot could be filled by jyshee (if she decides to go online to FB more often), a new member on that site, or best of all, a woman I meet ON THE GROUND. Alice is an 8, so I'm aiming for a 7 to 8 with a good personality.
So I may end up with:
Vi Phuong Doan
Thuy Vo (let's see)
I have a few serious questions for you guys:
1. Is 6 or 7 too many for a 2 or 3 week trip? (all are in HCMC/can be in HCMC)
2. How many dates should I have with each?
3. How to tell the good ones from the bad ones?
4. How to tell the others once I've decided on one?
5. Do I need to bring gifts/stuff?
I only want good, solid advice. Well thought out responses.
I used to fly back to TW periodically to chase skirt, staying for 2-4 weeks at a time. Realistically, I think it's do-able to juggle between 2 girls, but 3 is a bit too much. Not sure how you'd deal with 6-7 in 2 weeks.
A few years ago I had arranged to have lunch with one girl at Taipei rail station (food court upstairs), then coffee with girl #2 in the afternoon. Consider, if I had missed up the timing, or one of the girls decided to arrive early or hang around to do a little shopping, it'd have been rather awkward. So, avoid using the same meeting place (or general area) for different girls if possible.
How should I ditch Thuy? And how do I tell the others/lie to the others that I won't be able to visit?
I'd ditch Thuy Vo (don't know how, but I've already been calling her "honey" and stuff), and save hoang anh for a later visit.
I guess its going to be:
Vi Phuong Doan
yuny / Rose
What do you think of this for a 3 week visit?
If I follow the plan to have 2 girls in a 2 week visit, I'm going to have to tell a lot that I won't be able to make it.
Just after I joined HA I went to Guangzhou for 2 weeks, met 6 ladies and... 6 ladies was too much dating in a fortnight.
I didn't marry any of them, but the main girl I went to visit is still a friend (and goodness knows I've caused enough chaos in her life!).
Bring small gifts for ladies - chocolates from Western countries are good as they can share them/eat them themselves then have no memory of a bad date if it didn't work out.
You'll know after date #1 if you want to go on date #2. If there was no chemistry, defriend and move on. Avoid clingy girls at all costs.
If you find The One, you'll have no need to talk to any of the others.
And yes, only date girls in one city, otherwise the logistics get too crazy.
OK so I guess:
Thuy Vo (to see how she behaves)
Vi Phuong Doan (her personality is like a chick with balls, one time jokingly called me a "p***y" for wanting to sleep but not admitting it)
Alice (if she darn replies)
Rose / yuny (only after 5PM each day)
Thi Hua (she's for sure)
Assuming a 2 week visit, maybe cut it down to 3 or 4?
UPDATE: Thuy Vo has been eliminated from my list.
Last edited by Bao3niang on Fri Apr 11, 2014 4:14 am, edited 1 time in total.
Just date as many as you can. You're one of the few on this forum who is still young and idealistic. And I think you're a good guy too. So better move in and find a nice one or more before vultures move in. But if you can find the truly good women you don't have to worry about the monger scum moving in cuz she'll send them away.
I'm speeding up the elimination process. Thuy Vo is maybe a 6 in terms of looks, but 2 or 3 when it comes to personality.
Like seriously? She put 4 dots (....) as her self-description. On the other hand, let's take a look at the profiles of the girls I get along with.
1. http://www.vietnameselove.com/Rosepearl (she recently made a new profile, her old one was more well written)
What do you notice that these 4 profiles have in common compared to Thuy Vo's profile? First, they specify the age of the guy that they are looking for. Thuy Vo's profile sets "Any" for both maximum and minimum age for the guy, which means that she can be with me today and run off with a 40 year old Westerner the next day. I know her history and it's been confirmed that she's slutty.
Secondly, and most importantly, the profiles of Vi Doan, Alice, and Thi Hua (along with Rose's old profile) actually tells us something about their personality, while Thuy's self-description is just 4 dots like WTF. The other profiles show that the girls are at least willing to put some time into introducing themselves, while Thuy's is just damn lazy.
Also, Thuy changed her country of residence from Vietnam to Thailand, but kept her city of residence as Ho Chi Minh City. Now unless I broaden my search to "All Countries" I can't even find her profile. Does this show something about her? I mean, what's the point of lying about your country of residence when anyone can go on Google and find that Ho Chi Minh City is in VN?
I haven't seen any good members join that site recently. Maybe I'm starting to give up a bit of hope. The chances of finding a good one that's relationship/marriage material is about 1 in 50 or 60. Before I was just playing around, but now that I'm serious, I'm setting much higher "admissions standards" for the X female:
1. Her self-description must have at least some reflection into her key personality traits, and if she has good language ability, it must also include her hobbies, current status, and what she's looking in a partner.
2. She cannot have any images of herself that are heavily Photoshopped or with strange decorative effects (sign of immaturity). She cannot have too many photos with weird expressions, nor can they be extremely flashy and provocative. I'd say a woman with more than 4 or 5 photos in her profile is at least somewhat of a narcissist.
3. She cannot set "Any" as the maximum and minimum age of the guy she's looking for. Again, these types can run off with a 60 year old just as easily compared to a 25 year old.
4. Her profile headline cannot have cliches like "I just want someone to love me", "I'm just a simple girl" etc..... I'd rather that you have a well-thought out, well-written self-description.
5. She must specify her occupation. "Student" is included.
6. She cannot have more than 1 comment by guys on her profile. A woman's profile with many comments from guys is an indication that she's the "everyone's lover" type.
Yes, 1 profile must meet all 6 requirements to be considered.
The "X" is ideally a woman that's a 7 or 8 in looks (maybe downgraded to six), and 7 to 10 for personality (maybe 8 to 10).
Hey, Baoning! The best thing to do is to narrow your list of girls to 3-5 people, and then, once you meet them, determine which ones to keep and which ones to avoid.
But make sure to meet them in-person to determine if there's any chemistry involved, and if there is, you'll know you met the right one.
Even seemingly decent and intelligent people seem to be living in a fantasy world now.
Meeting 3 women a week is ok if your looking for a relationship, I wouldn't do more than that. If she's not flirting with you and smiling a lot on the first date I would send her packing, its a sign she's not interested. The most trustworthy women love to cook and clean, if she can't cook it means she expects you to do it, get rid of her. Keep your options open, just tell the other women you need some time to think about it and you'll decide once you get home. Go to Walmart and buy some $20 perfume for each of them, they'll like it and it won't take up much room in your luggage, assuming the TSA will let you bring that much on the plane. I think they have rules about bringing liquids on board.
Why are you choosing Vietnamese women? Interesting. Well, I've had a great deal of experience with them and feel I know them well. Although I generally believe that most foreign women are not the ole perverbial "green card" hunters, I also firmly believe that certain countries are exceptions to that rule, or at least carry higher risks of that, which just means you have to be ultra careful in those places. I think Vietnamese women are more calculating and more likely to want you and marry you for wrong reasons and then leave you later. In fact, I dated strictly Vietnamese women between 18 yrs old and 32 years old and even they admitted that a great many of them will not stay with you after they get here. The lady who cuts my hair thinks the same. Well, just make very good use of your instincts. Generally, if a girl is super sweet, humble, doesn't party or bar hop, and is very caring to her parents and others, then you have a decent chance of finding a sincere one. However, since you are college aged (I'm presuming), hence I'll assume you are not ready to get married, then everything I just said is irrelevant and have yourself a good time parting with the ladies over there.
Those rules involved bringing liquids in your hand carries, and yes, they may well get confiscated. You can bring perfume in your check in luggage.
Yeah well it isn't 100%. And it's a lot more difficult these days to find these places. It usually means blazing your own path. As in, I mean Baoning might need to learn Vietnamese and head out to the jungles of vietnam...and if mongers eventually head out there then maybe a few need to end up deported in a pine box to make mongers stay OUT!
Who is online
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest