Join John Adams, world renowned Intl Matchmaker, Monday nights 8:30 EST for Live Webcasts!
And check out Five Reasons why you should attend a FREE AFA Seminar! See locations and dates here.
View Active Topics View Your Posts Latest 100 Topics FAQ Topics Mobile Friendly Theme
Ask questions and get advice. Disclaimer: Any advice you take here is at your own risk. We are not liable for any consequences you might incur from following advice here. Note: Before posting your question, do a search for it in the Google Search box at the top to see if it's been addressed.
11 posts • Page 1 of 1
I assume that most people on here are young males in their 20's/30's,dissatisfied and disillusioned with the social culture here in the US, struggling to get by without any complications with law and/or women. So how do you personally deal with the feeling of emptiness or loneliness that this place casts upon the likes of us? Do you work overtime or excessively indulge in your hobbies like reading or working out? You might say that I'm assuming and speaking from my perspective, but the question that I'm trying to ask the reader remains the same. What is it that you do to compensate for the lack of true friendship or romance, and the things that a normal dude that somewhat fits into this dysfunctional piece of shit culture does or takes part in? Then if you feel that those things are not all that important to you, maybe you could share with us how you get on with your life in general or how do you deal with the anger and frustration that comes as a result of dealing with these shitty mediocre middle-class douchebags that constitute the majority of the population in this country?
Jusqu'au bout a tout prix..
Check out our Dating Sites and International Romance Tours!
Special Offer! FREE 6 Month Membership on ForeignWomen.com! Sign up here.
Find Your Foreign Sweetheart Now! Try our international Dating Sites and Overseas Romance Tours!
Hobbies, more or less. But it goes deeper than that. There is the hope of going abroad again, of course. But living in America, the key is compartmentalization. Life goes into several different boxes; some of those boxes are hobbies or passions. Others are job, college, whatever else you do. If you have goals, you have boxes that you can delve into to keep your sanity. And when at work, you are in work mode, for example. Everything has its compartment. That way, things you love can remain things you love instead of getting mixed into your life as a whole, which would make you hate it all together. So in America, when I am doing something productive and useful (working for myself), I'm in a positive box and it helps me cope. When I'm in the work box, it's just a temporary thing until I can return to what I care about. If I thought about it as one continuous life that sucks, it would probably beat me down and keep me there.
Whom are we kidding....Nothing works...I have tried it all....Eventually It gets you one way or the other... ....The best way is to be prepared for it.
I tried watching comedy shows on youtube to feel lighter, did hobbies, watched movies, went out, went abroad, planned for abroad when back home- it helped for a while, tried cooking, chatting, facebooking, did yoga, meditation, video games, did internet research for passing time, worked my a** out, went to office, did freelancing, wanked....Allahs...All these were mere postponing of the inevitable....The anger, frustration, loneliness of living on earth will get you eventually today or tomorrow or after one week or a month....But It will find you.
The above are just temporary solutions to a bigger issue - The only permanent solution it seems is to escape the earth itself - It seems, everything we touch, we feel produce some sort of negative energy now a days that gets us eventually in the form of anger.
The thing I do now is...I built up my anger...store it all in...and let it go all out in one go....I don't get angry all day, frustrated, I suck it all up...I have prepared a day for being angry, letting out all the stored up frustration of one month and so far it has worked wonderfully.
Feeling Angry, being lonely, frustrated is the RIGHT kind of emotion a sane human being produces living in a Psycotic place. Its not your fault.
The problems just don't go away, if we chose to Ignore it by doing other things - Anger, being lonely, frustration are real emotions that our mind feels and we need to deal with them. It won't just go away, doing other things. They are the after effects of experience we feel living on a Psychotic place called planet earth.
Remember, Its NOT YOU...who is the problem. Being angry, frustrated, being lonely is not your fault....you get it by living on earth. Don't Ignore it. Deal with it.
Do a 30 Day anger cycle - Chose a day to let it all out - You have the right to be angry with this Psycotic world - Hit Back - You will feel better. Its not You. Its the world.
Agreed. Can I borrow a rocket from one of your alien amigos?
For me I am just focused on working hard welding at community college for the greater goal of finding the FSU woman I was meant to be with and starting my life with her in Eastern Europe somewhere. I have heard that the oil fields are already full up with pipe welders. Hopefully, there is a demand for fabrication welders needed up in the Alberta or Saskatchewan oil fields.
I am angry about the environment I am in at college. since I ignored this one girl and she has spread this false rumor that I am a fag to the whole college and getting everyone to join in talking about me behind my back. I thought college was a place for professionals to learn their trade, not stupid childish games and locker room gossip. Is this the kind of work environment that many American Women create? No wonder companies are going belly up with the low morale of their employees due to the toxic work environment. No matter, this is only temporary. The joke will be on the stupid American guys who have joined the gossip lynch mob when Uncle Sam comes to clean them out through the divorce courts in 5-10 years.
Thinking about my about the future goal to also help remind myself of why I am putting up with this crap. Getting out of that building as soon as I am finished with classes also helps.
LOL, get use to it dude. Shit like that just keeps going once you get out of college and enter the working world. You have to work for yourself to avoid shit like that; there's no escaping it in the working world.
To sum it up, corporate America is just an extension of college, and college is just an extension of high school.
There is already a long queue
Well as i am in the second part of 30's,i have a more relaxed attitude to that.
Also as i will secure some 4,5 months to SEA next year,that put my mind to ease.
The only path to deal with anger,frustration,is for me to plan my trip and build a social circle outside.
It's hard but at least when i manage to spend some months in good company,i'm allright.
I'm from Paris and there is an advantage here compared to the US.
The pressure from society is less so living my life in a remote way it's not so difficult.
Also you can get some welfare from the state..it's small money but it let you to live here and have free time to go abroad if you have some cash in the bank.
What's cool is that the douchebag occurence,especially the guys and the on your face aggressiveness of women is totally less prevalent than in the US,so that makes the life more easy,without being aggressed and you feel less that you are put down because you are a loner.
They let live your life partially..it's up to each to have their way.
If you're young, this is what you do (Well, you and I are different but here goes). Focus on your career. Monk mode (If you're familiar with the PUA culture, you'll know what that is). Get a Wall Street mindset. Everything flows to the top in the US, and you will make darn sure that you'll love this fact when you're older. I don't know what you are trying to pursue, but I'm obviously pursuing tech as you can see by my name. There are really only 3 careers worth pursuing, everything else can be treated as hobby. That is: Sales, Wall Street, and Silicon Valley. Why? Because these careers are scalable. You aren't trading time for money for a flat wage. You get commission on sales. You get bonuses in Wall Street. You get equity in Silicon Valley. All of these careers give you no emotional capacity to feel anger and loneliness.
If you're not going for that kind of job, then you're going to take 2 nearly full time jobs to stack the cash and have no emotional capacity to feel anger and loneliness. For example, if you have an accounting job that pays 50k a year, then you'll also take a bartending job making 2.5k a month on the side, which will put you to 80k. Get the pattern? You should be working 12+ hours a day at least 5 days a week.
Edit: If you are incapable or unwilling to do this, that's fine too. Just know "no pain, no gain" and you are gonna go through some pain to be accepted for immigration to Europe.
Read Mantak Chia, starting with Male Multiple 0rgasm. I can hear you already saying "WTF?" Both unbalanced masculinity and unbalanced femininity cause loneliness, but unbalanced masculinity tends to generate anger while unbalanced femininity tends to generate depression. It is much easier for a man to balance his masculinity by developing his female pole than for a woman to the opposite. Masturbating (solo path to cultivation of enlightenment) while imagining yourself as a woman is the way to develop your female pole. Not only will this balance your masculinity, but it will give you insight into female sexual response, so you will be a better lover, for the day when you do get a girlfriend and are thus able to practice dual path to cultivation of enlightenment. Becoming multi-0rgasmic will also make you a better lover.
1. Study smart, graduate gracefully, and get a well paid job.
2. Make sure your final job is boring, predictable, and as little office politics as possible.
Why? You want your mind to be free from negative influences, and also give time for other thoughts, such as planning your future. You have enough emotional burden due to lack of physical and emotional intimacy. Last thing you want is constant thinking on how to address mind games at work, how to solve a difficult problem at work etc.
3. Do p4p sometimes (morality, legality, etc, you should be a grown up now and know what to do).
4. Be careful with (3). Every time you taste the real thing, you will keep wanting it. Not getting it will give you serious withdrawal issue. It's not necessarily addiction, because like food, you want to eat everyday too, and you are not addicted to food. It's normal to want intimacy, it is human nature.
5. Save aggresively. Invest wisely. Dare to take calculated risk. You are young, you can afford to fail. If you don't fail, you will reap the big rewards. If you fail, you only get delayed 2-3 years. Start again.
6. Do all these and you will survive mentally sound, and can retire in less than 15 years.
7. Travel abroad. Get your dream girl.
But before retirement, make sure you buy a house, and have it all paid off. It can be done. I am doing it now in one of the most expensive country in the world. Don't give lame excuses. The house is part of the key package. For many of you, one day you will return no matter how long you are abroad. That house will shelter you, and hopefully your dream girl too.
You finally made it. You will be less than 40, and live with your pretty girl in her 20s in a house fully owned by yourself. Both of you will live comfortably solely on investment income.
It will be a long dry 15 years, but hey, you are more than 15 now, you can survive another 15 years.
DO NOT divert your needs. If you want sex or intimacy, GET IT. Find a non-attractive girl, older lady, do p4p, etc...just GET IT. This is not permanent, so don't feel sorry for yourself, and don't get too attached. The gym sessions, dancing class, fishing trips, late night out....they are all OK, but they neither fill your desire nor solve your problem. Diversion will cause long term mental issues, with fatal consequences.
I wish to come back 10 to 15 years just so I can reply to my own post