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Girls I admire keep flaking on me, advice needed

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Girls I admire keep flaking on me, advice needed

Postby bng » Mon Oct 17, 2016 8:27 pm

hi all,
i have a problem i hope someone can give me a little feedback
background: east asian, looking for datable girlfriend only, meets about 3 or 5 potential girl each year only, despite going out semi frequently. don't care about models or hot chicks, but desires generic girls with a great mindset aka not crazy. live in USA. potential matches are just really hard to find in my city.

issue: this has happened more than 1 occasion now. I will see 2 girls or more in a group, they all from aboard, open the whole group, and either take on the group myself or have a wing to join in after a bit in order to get some 1 on 1 time. i will be that set for around 2 hours or more. everything on my end will feel great, girls will be laughing and i will dhv to them. then the night gets late and we will all leave the venue and go home. what bothers me is that usually they will agree to doing something the next day but they will all flake. they won't even accept me on facebook. this starts to bother me more and more as i could not figer out what is going on. for 2 years now, one girl in each of the year i would really like, completely went silent.

it is not in my nature to actively seeking ons or go for make outs on first meeting.
i also sense that since these are tourist from another country, they might not seeing me as a dating candidate. but to completely go good bye have a nice life on me, it hurts.

any comments or criticism is welcomed and appreciated, just because i am in search of a girlfriend does not mean i will lower my standards. kindly don't tell me "p***y is p***y". i don't run like that.
thanks in advance.
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Re: Girls I admire keep flaking on me, advice needed

Postby HouseMD » Tue Oct 18, 2016 2:22 am

It sounds like you need to drop the PUA garbage, it generally creeps girls out unless it is congruent with your personality.
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Re: Girls I admire keep flaking on me, advice needed

Postby bng » Tue Oct 18, 2016 3:04 am

HouseMD wrote:It sounds like you need to drop the PUA garbage, it generally creeps girls out unless it is congruent with your personality.

there is no game material used at all. i used those terms in order to communicate more efficiently and clearly here, since most of you understand what they means.
the fundamentals of pua does not fit well with my ideology.
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Re: Girls I admire keep flaking on me, advice needed

Postby retiredfrank » Tue Oct 18, 2016 3:52 am

You either have nothing they want or you do have something they want but you failed to make that clear to them or you have something they want but it comes with a lot of bullshit attached such that they say "thanks but no thanks". Same answer as for any salesman who isn't succeeding.

I vote for explanation 3, based solely on your initial post. You sound like a PUA jerk, which I would find a huge turnoff, though of course I'm speaking as a man.

Explanation 1 is also possible. Men are sexually of little value in the United States, especially Asians, unless they are in the elite. Most young men simply have little to offer young women in the USA.

What exactly are you trying to accomplish? Get your balls emptied in a vagina? Play around sexually where there is mutual attraction? Run up your notch count to impress other PUAs? Marry and create a family with children? Find someone for human companionship?

You might want to ask this question on the Roosh V forum, where the PUAs hang out.
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Re: Girls I admire keep flaking on me, advice needed

Postby bng » Tue Oct 18, 2016 4:14 am

retiredfrank wrote:You either have nothing they want or you do have something they want but you failed to make that clear to them or you have something they want but it comes with a lot of bullshit attached such that they say "thanks but no thanks". Same answer as for any salesman who isn't succeeding.

I vote for explanation 3, based solely on your initial post. You sound like a PUA jerk, which I would find a huge turnoff, though of course I'm speaking as a man.

Explanation 1 is also possible. Men are sexually of little value in the United States, especially Asians, unless they are in the elite. Most young men simply have little to offer young women in the USA.

What exactly are you trying to accomplish? Get your balls emptied in a vagina? Play around sexually where there is mutual attraction? Run up your notch count to impress other PUAs? Marry and create a family with children? Find someone for human companionship?

You might want to ask this question on the Roosh V forum, where the PUAs hang out.


i think you must omited what i wrote on the background. the whole ideal of me going out is to find a girlfriend. i really do not care for hot chicks or models as they offer little to me. however, once in a blue moon that i will find a girl, by talking to her, i will know that if i dated her, all aspects of life will enhance and my performance across all aspect of life will improve. the significant other plays a great supporting part, even to someone who is confident.

the idea that i try to print to their mind, like i said in op, is not trying to pull a one nighter, but hopefully by the time we say good bye, she realizes that i am genuinely a different and guy that have depth. that is why it saddens me that they don't even try to stay in touch. i am in my mid thirties and i hope to adjust this sooner, hopefully from advises that you will give.

PS. Roosh is wrong on many of his advises. if you want cheap and dirty sex, go with him. if you want anything remotely respectable, roosh is not it.
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Re: Girls I admire keep flaking on me, advice needed

Postby Zambales » Tue Oct 18, 2016 8:43 am

You say these women are tourists but you want someone who lives in the USA. I don't get it.
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Re: Girls I admire keep flaking on me, advice needed

Postby Kradmelder » Tue Oct 18, 2016 8:52 am

You say it is late night, and a venue. Is this a club or bar? You claim to want a nice girl to date long term yet are trying to pick them up in bars???


If you are going to pick them up in bars, bang them that night and forget the GF thing. If you want a better quality woman, look elsewhere.

Personally, I don't like bars and don't go to them often. Especially at night. I don't enjoy drunk people (especially women), loud music, smokey places and the whole vibe of bars and clubs. Just not my thing.
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Re: Girls I admire keep flaking on me, advice needed

Postby bng » Wed Oct 19, 2016 5:10 am

Kradmelder wrote:You say it is late night, and a venue. Is this a club or bar? You claim to want a nice girl to date long term yet are trying to pick them up in bars???


If you are going to pick them up in bars, bang them that night and forget the GF thing. If you want a better quality woman, look elsewhere.

Personally, I don't like bars and don't go to them often. Especially at night. I don't enjoy drunk people (especially women), loud music, smokey places and the whole vibe of bars and clubs. Just not my thing.


I understand the chance of meeting my future wife is slim to non in a club setting.

the venue is a tourist spot, it allows me to meet people from all over the world without leaving town. Most of them is just there taking in the scenery,

I don't care where the girls is from, I just want someone that is genuine, not crazy and with integrity, and not fat. they do exists as americans, but it just hard to find in my city. i seem to be able to find them a little more easier outside of usa / tourists.

please pardon as my posts has a delay since i am new here and all my posts needs to be approved by admin before they will appear.
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Re: Girls I admire keep flaking on me, advice needed

Postby retiredfrank » Wed Oct 19, 2016 5:32 am

bng wrote:
retiredfrank wrote:You either have nothing they want or you do have something they want but you failed to make that clear to them or you have something they want but it comes with a lot of bullshit attached such that they say "thanks but no thanks". Same answer as for any salesman who isn't succeeding.

I vote for explanation 3, based solely on your initial post. You sound like a PUA jerk, which I would find a huge turnoff, though of course I'm speaking as a man.

Explanation 1 is also possible. Men are sexually of little value in the United States, especially Asians, unless they are in the elite. Most young men simply have little to offer young women in the USA.

What exactly are you trying to accomplish? Get your balls emptied in a vagina? Play around sexually where there is mutual attraction? Run up your notch count to impress other PUAs? Marry and create a family with children? Find someone for human companionship?

You might want to ask this question on the Roosh V forum, where the PUAs hang out.


i think you must omited what i wrote on the background. the whole ideal of me going out is to find a girlfriend. i really do not care for hot chicks or models as they offer little to me. however, once in a blue moon that i will find a girl, by talking to her, i will know that if i dated her, all aspects of life will enhance and my performance across all aspect of life will improve. the significant other plays a great supporting part, even to someone who is confident.

the idea that i try to print to their mind, like i said in op, is not trying to pull a one nighter, but hopefully by the time we say good bye, she realizes that i am genuinely a different and guy that have depth. that is why it saddens me that they don't even try to stay in touch. i am in my mid thirties and i hope to adjust this sooner, hopefully from advises that you will give.

PS. Roosh is wrong on many of his advises. if you want cheap and dirty sex, go with him. if you want anything remotely respectable, roosh is not it.


My first piece of advice is drop all that PUA lingo about opening sets and whatnot. If you want a life partner, just be yourself and don't work hard. A quality man offering marriage is something very hard for women to find and they have a biological clock, so if they see you have what they want, they will do most of the work.

I think the big problem is none of these women see any value in you. DHV is just PUA mumbo-jumbo. You can pretend you are high value all you want, but these women are clearly saying you are low or zero value to them.

If you have a steady job, are physically healthy, in your thirties, in good physical condition, you DO have value in the Philippines, on the other hand. I'm no fan of bringing foreign wives back to the USA, due to possibility of divorce raping, but you are clearly the type of guy for whom that might be a risk worth taking. And going abroad is what this site is all about. So forget the stupid PUA stuff, forget American nightclubs where you have no value as a man, and go somewhere where you do have value as a man.
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Re: Girls I admire keep flaking on me, advice needed

Postby Zambales » Wed Oct 19, 2016 7:54 am

Best way to be around women in my experience is to be cool, calm and collected. Coming across as too pushy or over zealous won't go down very well and neither will hints of anxiety or desperation.

And never go overboard and force a woman to like you by trying to buy her. Let her make her own mind up.

If you carry that cool persona and she finds you physically attractive and you're able to engage in good conversation, you don't really have to do much else. :wink:
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