Would Winston be happier abroad in Europe?

[momopi]

@momopi sure I agree with you he should get onto those things - making a list would be very helpful, I'm not a list guy but occasionally I'll do it and feel better when I get those things crossed off. However, this is not how Winston's psychology works - put it down to the wonders and marvels of the broad spectrum of human existence.

The purpose (of the list) is to force yourself to prioritize certain goals over others. If you want to do A then why are you doing B and C before A? What have you done today toward A and what are you doing tomorrow toward A?

[El_Caudillo]

@momopi what do you think the chances are he makes such a list? And you're missing something, Europe is only something to fixate on temporarily until the next idea comes along. It's the mental fixation which is really important for W - action in the physical world is inconsequential.

[momopi]

@momopi what do you think the chances are he makes such a list? And you're missing something, Europe is only something to fixate on temporarily until the next idea comes along. It's the mental fixation which is really important for W - action in the physical world is inconsequential.

The passage of time and aging in the physical realm is merciless. The consequence of failure to prioritize and take action is on him.

[publicduende]

@momopi what do you think the chances are he makes such a list? And you're missing something, Europe is only something to fixate on temporarily until the next idea comes along. It's the mental fixation which is really important for W - action in the physical world is inconsequential.

The passage of time and aging in the physical realm is merciless. The consequence of failure to prioritize and take action is on him.

That is precisely what I told him, too. Whatever opportunity window he might have, in Europe or elsewhere, is closing fast. If he stops thinking that taking shortcuts is a good (enough) avenue, he might as well start improving himself and grab a chance to find a stable relationship.

For how much you want to define him as a "cloud", clouds don't last forever. They eventually evaporate up or come down as rain...and they end up feeding the grass and the trees

This uber-libertine way of thinking is not doing him any good. And whoever is advising him not to steer away from it while he still has time (and not much left of it, IMHO) and continuing his merry-go-round on the web and on Fields Avenue, isn't certainly doing him a favour.

I might have been a bit too much on the rude & radical side when addressing him, but my point has been very clear: he needs to land back on the ground and start acting like an adult. Society demands it, women (any woman) demands it. If he doesn't at least find a compromise, he risks being lost for good.

[Winston]

Update:

Rock is in Amsterdam now. He went to Belgium too. He says that I was right, that Europe does have a good vibe that feels nice and soulful and down to earth. People are also real and upfront, with no BS politeness like in Asia. He said Amsterdam felt very free and open, like you could do anything. He said I would like it there. Like I said, Europe has more old soul types like me, that are more mature and down to earth, soulwise that is. So it fits me better. And there is no cold wall between people like in America or Taiwan, so talking to strangers does not feel awkward or unnatural.

Also my close Venetian friend Alex said that regardless of whether I can date girls in Italy or not, that I would probably fit into Italian culture well, much more than American or Taiwanese culture at least.

So I don't know why Publicduende was so poo hoo about Europe. But he's just one man with one opinion, not God. And one very arrogant man at that. I can find many other men who say different things, even in Europe. Plus it was stupid and fallacious for PD to presume that all of Europe is like London or that London represents all of Europe. Very stupid indeed. I'm surprised anyone could be that dumb and not even see it or correct himself. Very weird.

[Winston]

Btw guys, when I was in Poland, my British friend James dated a younger girl even though he was an older man. I met her too. So it's possible to date younger women. Oh and no he wasn't rich or anything, just a really personable and genuine man who was playful and enthusiastic, like a boy in a man's body (similar to me). I guess if you are a likable guy, you can date younger girls, especially if you fit into the culture, like I do in Europe. So I have seen older men with younger women in Europe. Just wanted to let you guys know that, since it just came to my mind now. I should have brought this up earlier. Anyway, everyone's situation is different. There are no absolute rules or linear logic when it comes to human relationships and human affairs. Wise men know this. So please stop putting everything in boxes you guys.

[Winston]

Ok I found some photos of James, the friend I mentioned above, to show you guys. Here is me and him below in his room at a place he rented in a small town in Poland. As you can see, he is not rich, but he is a playful freespirit type, kind of like Robin Williams, and he was just teaching English there. Yet he was dating a younger girl there.



Below, in the photo on the top left, you can see James and the girl he was dating there. As you can see, she is kind of plain, but sweet.



Photos below of me and James having some beer with his friends and associates.



Some photos of me in that quiet small town in Poland, I think it was called Olsztyn or something.



So you see guys. Everything I say is real and backed up. That's why I'm one of the more credible people online and offline too.

[Neo]

We all look for camaraderie, for fellowship, for someone to validate our stance and our opinions on our favorite topics and all our deep desires. However, in my experience, unless the person is like-minded with the same desires, expressing my deepest heart-felt opinions and beliefs is to be avoided. It is very likely the other person, whoever it is, will disagree because of different life experience, person bias, person failures or successes, or because they simply don't have the vision or any faith, or worse.

In other words, any time a person goes expressing something deep from the heart, he needs to beware that it is extremely likely that someone is going to come and find error or fault with it, either real or imagined, or otherwise simply oppose everything, or say it is impossible.

That's why I just keep my thoughts to myself on most issues.

And also, if the other person is successful in discouraging you, then you've just abandoned your heart's desires, because someone else said it's impossible.

Not everyone needs to know your life plans. Just like not everyone needs to know how much you weigh, how much money you have in the bank, intimate details about romantic relationships, etc.

[yick]

What I do know about dating in (western...) Europe is that past 30 - you're not getting the young ones and if you don't want single mothers - you're gonna be shit-out-of-luck 99 times out of 100.

Once you're past 30 and definitely once you're past 40 - it's single mothers/divorcees or jerking off in your room at night - you might get a single woman who has never married nor had kids but - I wouldn't want that personally - if she was decent - she would have been snapped up sooner or later by her early 30's at the most.

Personally, I would rather stay single than even attempt it.

[Cornfed]

What I do know about dating in (western...) Europe is that past 30 - you're not getting the young ones and if you don't want single mothers - you're gonna be shit-out-of-luck 99 times out of 100.

Once you're past 30 and definitely once you're past 40 - it's single mothers/divorcees or jerking off in your room at night - you might get a single woman who has never married nor had kids but - I wouldn't want that personally - if she was decent - she would have been snapped up sooner or later by her early 30's at the most.

Which is basically what PD was correctly pointing out. Of course all such advice is probabilistic. People do win lotteries despite the overwhelming odds.

[Shemp]

Winston has always expressed a preference for eastern Europe, and what yick says is not true there. Men in EE over 40 routinely get younger women for both short-term relationships and marriage. I'm not sure what Winston is looking for these days. If he doesn't want more children or marriage, I don't see any reason to rule out well preserved women in their 40's, whatever their status: childless and never married, divorced/widiwed and children grown.

[yick]

I did say (in parenthesis ) western Europe in all fairness, Frank. He was talking about the Netherlands or Italy I think. I agree he could or would probably find what he is looking for in the FSU...

[yick]

What I do know about dating in (western...) Europe is that past 30 - you're not getting the young ones and if you don't want single mothers - you're gonna be shit-out-of-luck 99 times out of 100.

Once you're past 30 and definitely once you're past 40 - it's single mothers/divorcees or jerking off in your room at night - you might get a single woman who has never married nor had kids but - I wouldn't want that personally - if she was decent - she would have been snapped up sooner or later by her early 30's at the most.

Which is basically what PD was correctly pointing out. Of course all such advice is probabilistic. People do win lotteries despite the overwhelming odds.

Not quite, PD was stating Winston couldn't get ANY women - and Winston was quite correct to call him out on that (the meltdown was completely uneccessary though...) but the women he would be able to get for the most part would be single mums - his age works against him in such a big way with this - and I can say this about the UK - the men are far better looking than the women - it isn't like these fat little slags in their twenties are short of homegrown options - they aren't.

There is a reason why Thailand is full of thirsty Europeans of all ages, shapes and sizes, what do you think they're all doing there? If they wanted to ride an elephant that badly, they can do that shit back home it's because the woman situation back home is f***ing dire.

The one country where the GA is thriving and an accepted part of dating is CHINA! Money and the giving of it is such an integral part of dating for a man it isn't even questioned nor are the moral aspects of it - Winston likes Chinese women, is of Chinese ethnicity himself AND has a US passport - he would get himself some very tasty women on that back of what he has already - nothing to do with how he looks either - I have seen some absolute heaps dating beautiful women in this country.

[Winston]

What I do know about dating in (western...) Europe is that past 30 - you're not getting the young ones and if you don't want single mothers - you're gonna be shit-out-of-luck 99 times out of 100.

Once you're past 30 and definitely once you're past 40 - it's single mothers/divorcees or jerking off in your room at night - you might get a single woman who has never married nor had kids but - I wouldn't want that personally - if she was decent - she would have been snapped up sooner or later by her early 30's at the most.

Personally, I would rather stay single than even attempt it.

Maybe in general yes. But it depends on the guy. Every guy attracts different types of women. Some guys that are charming and have charisma will still date younger women even after they are 40. I saw it in Poland with a tall British guy.

But you gotta understand that in Europe, girls will still hang out with you even if they aren't interested in you romantically. Europe is not like America. The women there do not see guys as all or nothing. In America if a girl doesn't see you as "her type" she won't even be your friend or hang out. But not so in Europe. European and Russian women see nothing wrong with hanging out with a guy even if she's not dating him. They aren't uptight about that. Europeans tend to be very social. If you just want a female coffee companion to go to cafes with or do language/culture exchange with, or see museums with, etc. then that is easy to get in Europe as long as you are a decent, friendly, outgoing, positive, likable guy, or even if you are a backpacker guy.

That's what I'm referring to, about Euro women being SOCIAL. You can even meet up with girls from Couchsurfing and they will show you around and be glad to be your host too. European hospitality is different from America and not as agenda based.

So I'm not talking about romance or sex here. I'm just talking about being social and going out together. That is not hard to do in Europe since women there are pretty open about meeting new people and being social with interesting strangers. It's a very different social atmosphere, much more open, relaxed and inclusive. We all know that. Why are you guys always so focused on sexual relations?

[Winston]

Winston has always expressed a preference for eastern Europe, and what yick says is not true there. Men in EE over 40 routinely get younger women for both short-term relationships and marriage. I'm not sure what Winston is looking for these days. If he doesn't want more children or marriage, I don't see any reason to rule out well preserved women in their 40's, whatever their status: childless and never married, divorced/widiwed and children grown.

That's true. If you stick with Lithuania, Latvia, and even Estonia, you will see many single girls and yes some of them will be open to age differences. At least they will hang out and be glad to get a free dinner from you. But you gotta be proactive and approach lots of girls, and find the few that are willing to consider you or at least hang out with you. It's a numbers game but you are still in the game. It's not like you are out of the game and won't even make any female friends if you try hard enough and are proactive. But I'm not talking about sex or romance here. I'm just talking about hanging out with girls SOCIALLY ok. That is not hard at all if you are outgoing and friendly and likable and interesting to some extent and have a good personality. European ladies tend to be far more social than Americans or Asians. And they have an inner confidence too that Asians and Americans don't have when it comes to talking to strangers.