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Would you date a filipina that had a ........... ?

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Would you date a filipina that had a ........... ?

Postby dano » Sun May 16, 2010 2:45 am

Would you date a filipina that had a previous western boyfriend? I was just wondering if a filipina that was dumped by her western boyfriend might have to much baggage? Your thoughts please.
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Postby ladislav » Sun May 16, 2010 4:23 am

Boyfriend as in... what? He was banging her? No way in a million years! Shudder! But if she just went out to dinner and held hands, well, yeah, no problem.
But if I were living in the US, well, I may go with the first choice. But I am not living there. I have too many cute virgins banging on my doors here.
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Re: Would you date a filipina that had a ........... ?

Postby Rock » Sun May 16, 2010 4:36 am

dano wrote:Would you date a filipina that had a previous western boyfriend? I was just wondering if a filipina that was dumped by her western boyfriend might have to much baggage? Your thoughts please.


If she doesn't have children, why not? The adjustment process might be easier since she has presumably learned a lot about us from her previous relationship. If the girl is really your type, you might regret giving her a pass just for this reason.

BTW, dano, where are you based? Somehow, I was under the impression that you were in China.
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Postby Nate » Sun May 16, 2010 4:44 am

ladislav wrote:Boyfriend as in... what? He was banging her? No way in a million years! Shudder! But if she just went out to dinner and held hands, well, yeah, no problem.
But if I were living in the US, well, I may go with the first choice. But I am not living there. I have too many cute virgins banging on my doors here.


Ladislav-

Men that don't live in the Philippines or at least spend a lot of time there, really cannot comprehend what you
are saying. They have been so conditioned in the USA to be obsequious panty sniffers that they simply cannot
grasp how it could be somewhere else. You are dead on. I am 54, and yes, I am in pretty good shape, but I get
just about daily expressions of interest from girls 18-30, most of them virgins, especially those under 26 or so.
And mind you, I travel in pretty straight circles relatively, and have so many girls interested I cannot count.
I have trained my GF to ignore it, though I suspect that background may motivate her and girls in her situation
to keep their man very satisfied on a daily basis. After all, there are a thousand options knocking on the gates!

That said, there is no need for me to stray- My GF treats me great, is very affectionate towards me and is
pretty much enough of a totally hot chick to keep me well behaved. I don't cheat on her. She is a good hearted
girl and I know she genuinely cares for me a lot...
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Postby globetrotter » Sun May 16, 2010 7:48 am

Nate wrote:
ladislav wrote:Boyfriend as in... what? He was banging her? No way in a million years! Shudder! But if she just went out to dinner and held hands, well, yeah, no problem.
But if I were living in the US, well, I may go with the first choice. But I am not living there. I have too many cute virgins banging on my doors here.


Ladislav-

Men that don't live in the Philippines or at least spend a lot of time there, really cannot comprehend what you
are saying. They have been so conditioned in the USA to be obsequious panty sniffers that they simply cannot
grasp how it could be somewhere else. You are dead on. I am 54, and yes, I am in pretty good shape, but I get
just about daily expressions of interest from girls 18-30, most of them virgins, especially those under 26 or so.
And mind you, I travel in pretty straight circles relatively, and have so many girls interested I cannot count.
I have trained my GF to ignore it, though I suspect that background may motivate her and girls in her situation
to keep their man very satisfied on a daily basis. After all, there are a thousand options knocking on the gates!

That said, there is no need for me to stray- My GF treats me great, is very affectionate towards me and is
pretty much enough of a totally hot chick to keep me well behaved. I don't cheat on her. She is a good hearted
girl and I know she genuinely cares for me a lot...


Nate,

What's the financial situation with the GF? Are you buying the folks a house, paying for her University education, giving money to the relatives every weekend? Or are you just doing normal things with her?

How much are you spending per month?
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Postby Winston » Sun May 16, 2010 1:43 pm

That's a broad question. It depends on why he dumped her. But yeah, why not?

It's not like you're a virgin either, so why do you require virgins?

Besides, when a girl has had another guy, it makes me more jealous and I tend to "want my share of her" so as not to be left out, and that in itself causes a surge of hormones and lust in me that rages madly and gets me horny VERY fast. Maybe that sounds weird, but I've always been like that.

Ladislav, how do you know whether the girl is a virgin or not? Anyone can say that they are.
Last edited by Winston on Sun May 16, 2010 1:49 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Winston » Sun May 16, 2010 1:48 pm

globetrotter wrote:Nate,

What's the financial situation with the GF? Are you buying the folks a house, paying for her University education, giving money to the relatives every weekend? Or are you just doing normal things with her?

How much are you spending per month?


That's kind of a no win question, like asking a high pressure salesman "Are you a high pressure salesman"? They will say no whether they are or not.

What I mean is, if a Western guy is supporting his Filipina gf's family, he will not usually admit it and deny it if asked, and will laugh at anyone else who does. So whether he is or not, he will say no.

A lot of them compromise with the pressure for them to support the girl's family by giving their gf an allowance, from which she uses it to support her family. If he does that, he will simply call it her allowance and not "support" of her family. That is sort of a loophole so they can avoid saying that they support her family, while at the same time make everyone happy.
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Postby Nate » Sun May 16, 2010 6:25 pm

globetrotter wrote:
Nate wrote:
ladislav wrote:Boyfriend as in... what? He was banging her? No way in a million years! Shudder! But if she just went out to dinner and held hands, well, yeah, no problem.
But if I were living in the US, well, I may go with the first choice. But I am not living there. I have too many cute virgins banging on my doors here.


Ladislav-

Men that don't live in the Philippines or at least spend a lot of time there, really cannot comprehend what you
are saying. They have been so conditioned in the USA to be obsequious panty sniffers that they simply cannot
grasp how it could be somewhere else. You are dead on. I am 54, and yes, I am in pretty good shape, but I get
just about daily expressions of interest from girls 18-30, most of them virgins, especially those under 26 or so.
And mind you, I travel in pretty straight circles relatively, and have so many girls interested I cannot count.
I have trained my GF to ignore it, though I suspect that background may motivate her and girls in her situation
to keep their man very satisfied on a daily basis. After all, there are a thousand options knocking on the gates!

That said, there is no need for me to stray- My GF treats me great, is very affectionate towards me and is
pretty much enough of a totally hot chick to keep me well behaved. I don't cheat on her. She is a good hearted
girl and I know she genuinely cares for me a lot...


Nate,

What's the financial situation with the GF? Are you buying the folks a house, paying for her University education, giving money to the relatives every weekend? Or are you just doing normal things with her?

How much are you spending per month?




No problem, I guess I am not shy in this case about telling exactly what I am doing. Jie lives with me, so what she gets exactly is hard to
say. I did pay for the last 9 months of her college, she just graduated this year. She was supporting herself working at a bookstore in General Santos where I met her. I told her she could quite her job and concentrate on school and on us. Her parents are farmers in a very bandit infested area of Sulu, so I am careful about how I take trips there. Jie Probably spends P10,000 - P15,000 per month on various things, clothing and misc., as well as pocket money, taking a friend to lunch, buying this or that. I am not trying to keep her poor or anything, though she is not very money motivated and I am often the one that suggests she spend on something and she is hesitant to spend. You have seen what she looks like, so I can tell you that despite being such a beautiful girl, she is not vain. She would rather put on shorts and a t-shirt and work in the garden than go shopping most of the time.

Now about money and her family. Yes I have helped out her family financially. They have never asked me for any money or anything.
They are not desperately poor, but I know some extra cash would help them, so Jie sends her mom about P5000 every month(beyond the money for herself). Jie is the youngest child at 24, so it is not like she has a lot of siblings to worry about. Three of four times this year I will do specific things for her parents, such as an irrigation pump I will buy to insure water in times of drought like this year has had.

I have no mercy on deadbeats and lazy-asses. My Filipina Ex had some relatives who thought I would gift them cash to sit on their ass..WRONG! They found out I would not. In his late 50's, Jie's father is anything but lazy. Few men on this forum could keep up with him.

I think men should choose the right thing. Why is it that men who have been hosed by American women all the time for sometimes hundreds of thousands of dollars (plus the kids) get their panties in a knot over their Filipina giving mom a couple of hundred bucks?
I have had men who have had a girl living with them for months ask me if their GF was hosing them when she asked him to donate a hundred bucks to something like a family reunion. Huh? I think, "Dude, something is wrong with your brain and with you heart."

That all said, set limits and stick to them. Don't reward deadbeats, but encourage hard work and enterprise when you can.
Of course, men have their own budgets to work with, so one has to work within those constraints. One is not a sucker just because they
choose to do things for the GF's family, but the operative word here is "choice".

Getting hosed by some easy-ass trollop's deadbeat relatives is one thing. If you find a really good GF and choose to help out her
parents, that is quite another matter.

And Winston, you are quite correct, most men do not want to say what they are doing for the GF's family, but in reality it is part of the culture. You just have to manage expectations and try not to reward deadbeats, and live within your means.
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Postby FuzzX » Sun May 16, 2010 6:42 pm

lol, wtf? You give your gf's parents money??? Are you insane?
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Postby Nate » Sun May 16, 2010 9:41 pm

FuzzX wrote:lol, wtf? You give your gf's parents money??? Are you insane?


Haha...that's funny. I am not visiting the Philippines, I have roots here. While what I do would be my own business, I spend FAR LESS
helping out some good people than the average American or Canadian dolt spends on his she-pric girlfriend or wife. I do it not because I
am obligated, but because I like these people. It has less than NOTHING to do with what would be smart or dumb in the USA or Canada. It is a different world and I function pretty well in it. I chose who I will build bridges with carefully. Money can be used carefully to reinforce what is good, and withheld from the negatives.

If you live in the Philippines for while, if you were observant you could begin to see how the clan system works and how to avoid
troubles (The usual result for foreigners) and in fact work it to your advantage. That said, one has to choose very carefully. These guys hook up with an easy-ass ho and seem surprised that her family wants to make an easy-ass dollar off of him...it's a "Duh!" moment...

Now of course I did not start lavishing her or her parents with gifts initially. It was not till I could see that she was looking like a "keeper" did I spend more.

One way or the other, in the Philippines if you attempt to see the girl in isolation from her family and deal with her accordingly, you will be doomed to failure. One way or the other you have to see how she sees herself as part of a family, and negotiate your interactions
accordingly. Some guys don't do anything much for the girl or her parents. In any case I am not a bank for her extended family and they do not expect me to. For some guys who are in the Philippines for nothing more than cheap ass or a regular "hole in the mattress" to hump, I would suggest that they might limit their expenditures to boxes of condoms.

I have a life and a GF worthy of it. Now to really get your goat, if you can imagine, I not only keep my GF in cash, and gift out her parents, I am on occasion giving away for absolutely FREE, simple water purification systems to clusters of families whom fate puts in my path and I am getting NOTHING from them at all! Imagine that! I MUST be insane. Simple acts of kindness to near total strangers who do not even supply me with tail! I must be bending the rules of the universe! hehe...

To be fair to your assertion however, I must say that to the usual Ameriskank she-pric, I would give nothing ever other than a boot in the ass. I would not have them as a GF to begin with, so it would never be an issue. Now having an Ameriskank GF or living within the
North-American Anlgo-sphere brain-lock...that TRULY IS INSANE. A lot of guys in the USA kind of recognize that there is some kind of
problem, sneak out from time to time to for some p***y, and then go back the USA and live as the same little he-bitch they always were.

The Philippines is certainly not Mexico- you might spend some time in the Philippines and adjust your opinions accordingly.
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Postby dano » Mon May 17, 2010 2:45 am

FuzzX wrote:lol, wtf? You give your gf's parents money??? Are you insane?


Spending money on a woman or her family is rarely a good investment, unless she's a filipina. A good filipina will more than pay for herself as many have found out. Keep up the good work Nate !
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Postby Winston » Mon May 17, 2010 12:29 pm

Nate,
I commend your generosity. But I'm wondering, how well do you connect with these Filipino families? I mean do you hang out with them and talk to them? If so, what is there to talk about? It seems that you can't have any intelligent stimulating conversations with them. There isn't even a mental bond there.

Do you find that to be the case too?

You say there's no obligation to support them. Yet there definitely is an EXPECTATION isn't there? I can sense it too. It's in the vibe. There's this expectation that you have eternal extra cash on you that you can give away. There is no concern for you running out of cash or wasting money. That's what I hate about this expectation.

The expectation is based on a stereotype. But these people believe every stereotype they hear, mindlessly too. It's hard to reason with people who think that every stereotype is Gospel Truth. And if you can't reason with someone, how can you trust them?

Now there are some individual Filipinos that I like talking to and are easy to share my thoughts with and are good listeners too. Those I can talk to like friends. But packs of families are a different thing.
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expectations

Postby Nate » Mon May 17, 2010 5:56 pm

Winston wrote:Nate,
I commend your generosity. But I'm wondering, how well do you connect with these Filipino families? I mean do you hang out with them and talk to them? If so, what is there to talk about? It seems that you can't have any intelligent stimulating conversations with them. There isn't even a mental bond there.

Do you find that to be the case too?

You say there's no obligation to support them. Yet there definitely is an EXPECTATION isn't there? I can sense it too. It's in the vibe. There's this expectation that you have eternal extra cash on you that you can give away. There is no concern for you running out of cash or wasting money. That's what I hate about this expectation.

The expectation is based on a stereotype. But these people believe every stereotype they hear, mindlessly too. It's hard to reason with people who think that every stereotype is Gospel Truth. And if you can't reason with someone, how can you trust them?

Now there are some individual Filipinos that I like talking to and are easy to share my thoughts with and are good listeners too. Those I can talk to like friends. But packs of families are a different thing.



Well I have a couple of things in my favor. For one thing, Jie has no relatives at all in Bohol. She came to Bohol to be with me.
I guess that gives me the ability to measure my contact with her relatives, though I do get along well with her mother and father.
There may be some expectation there, but with them it is at a minimum or they hide it well. I'm a farmer at heart and Ji'e father is
really an expert. We do talk about farming, and if I get the land I want in Bohol, he is going to come up and graft Mangos for me.
There is a technique for double grafting mango starts so that the tree does not get so HUGE and difficult to manage and harvest.
This grafting technique causes the tree to be a "semi-dwarf" and it will also bear fruit earlier.

While I do get into some surprising conversations with certain filipinos, in general you are right- it is hard to have a stimulating conversation with most filipinos..then again, I find that true with most Americans, but I get your point. Jie has grown a lot since we met,
and we have some pretty good conversations. I give her books I have to read and she does quite well...after all, I met her when she worked in a book store...haha...

I have a university education in philosophy and natural sciences, so in reality I do not expect any girlfriend to match that, but that is ok.
Just when we think we are "all that"..we can get humbled. She does have an inclination for philosophical musings after a good roll in the hay, so we actually do get to talk a lot! haha..thank God she's a nympho- we get to talk a lot too!

Often I do miss educated men to talk with- just having a local friend with whom I can sit down at a cafe and talk about life. I'm trying to cure this and relieve some boredom when I open a nice little cafe and bar this coming year that will especially cater to more educated Filipinos and Foreigners. Out of that whole mix I should end up with people to talk with I think. I should have that open by early next year.
We will likely have the best restaurant food in Bohol. I dont know that it will make money, but it should keep the conversation going.
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Postby ladislav » Mon May 17, 2010 7:00 pm

It's not like you're a virgin either, so why do you require virgins?

I prefer a brand new car to a used one. And I am the driver, not the car. A driver should be experienced, a car should be new.

Besides, when a girl has had another guy, it makes me more jealous and I tend to "want my share of her" so as not to be left out, and that in itself causes a surge of hormones and lust in me that rages madly and gets me horny VERY fast. Maybe that sounds weird, but I've always been like that.


In the US, it would be that way, not here in RP. Here by virtue of association I feel I've been beaten to it( in other words, I feel like a Filipino guy). I am going to be spending all this money and time while there is this other guy out there who is now giggling and thinking the next guy a sod.

Ladislav, how do you know whether the girl is a virgin or not? Anyone can say that they are.


Oh, there are ways to see it, and body language and sixth sense that have rarely deceived me. That is one thing I am really good at seeing.
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Postby Winston » Mon May 17, 2010 7:29 pm

ladislav wrote:
It's not like you're a virgin either, so why do you require virgins?

I prefer a brand new car to a used one. And I am the driver, not the car. A driver should be experienced, a car should be new.


LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL that's an awesome analogy. I can't stop cracking up! LOL
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