Join John Adams, world renowned Intl Matchmaker, Thurs nights 8:30 EST for Live Webcasts with FREE Prizes!
And check out Five Reasons why you should attend a FREE Live AFA Seminar! See locations and details.


Scam free! Check out Christian Filipina - Meet Asian women with Christian values! Members screened.
Exclusive book offer! 75% off! How to Meet, Date and Marry Your Filipina Wife



View Active Topics       Latest 100 Topics       View Your Posts       FAQ Topics       Switch to Mobile


Question to everyone here....

Ask questions and get advice, or share advice. Disclaimer: Any advice you take here is at your own risk. We are not liable for any consequences you might incur from following someone's advice here.
Note: Before posting your question, do a search for it in the Google Search box at the top to see if it's already been addressed.

Moderators: jamesbond, fschmidt

Question to everyone here....

Postby chanta76 » Tue Nov 02, 2010 4:48 am

Hi,

I have a question. I been reading these forums on and off. I think I have a sense of the type of guys who want to live over seas. Honestly I understand some of the reason but it seems like the main part of the reason to live over seas is because of the women.

I was wondering what if...you met a great woman in USA...not the stereotypical American woman but a devoted good woman. How many of you guys would stay in the states to be with this woman?

I mean it seems like many of the guys who post here have a hard time connecting with American women and the biggest reason to go overseas is for the traditional woman . But what if you meet a nice (I know it's rare but it can happen.) woman here in the states. I mean how many of you will stay?
chanta76
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 1482
Joined: Mon Feb 11, 2008 3:56 pm







Postby ssjparris » Tue Nov 02, 2010 8:48 am

i would not stay at all. even if i did have a good woman that was american. it is too isolated and the environment is full of people that are anti-social and paranoid of eachother. i am getting out for companionship and friendly environement as well. people from other countries are just way better to connect with and a deeper meaning too.
ssjparris
Junior Poster
 
Posts: 819
Joined: Wed Sep 08, 2010 2:47 am

Postby Repatriate » Tue Nov 02, 2010 8:56 am

For me it's not so much about the women than it is the excitement and difference in living abroad. I would slowly go crazy living in a suburban white picket fence environment. I suppose I could move to a big city like Chicago or NY but I just don't care for the typical U.S. social environment that much. It's ok in small doses for vacation or recreation but having to live there constantly is not appealing. So, the answer is ..I would convince her to move overseas with me.

It would be nice to meet an American woman like this but it's literally like trying to find a lifetime score while panning for gold. It's unlikely to happen in even the best conditions.
Repatriate
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 2533
Joined: Sun Jun 15, 2008 6:39 pm

Postby Winston » Tue Nov 02, 2010 11:04 am

Even if you find a great woman in the states, after a while she'll just become a routine and life will become a routine again. Plus relationships are unstable in the US. At any moment when she falls out of love or gets bored, she'll leave. There is no sense of loyalty or commitment.

Being in different countries is what gives life variety and intrigue. The US is basically set up for routine. The only fun, romance, adventure you get is on TV, not in your lifestyle.
Check out the latest posts in our blog The Happier Abroaders.

Don't forget my HA Grand Ebook and Dating Sites!

"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne, How I Found Freedom in an Unfree World
User avatar
Winston
Site Admin
 
Posts: 23596
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 1:16 pm

Postby gsjackson » Tue Nov 02, 2010 2:41 pm

Good question. I would hope she'd be interested in spending a lot of time out of the U.S. But when you marry a woman, you marry her culture, and I just can't see marrying American culture. I could bury myself in my little subcultures like handball and golf if I lived here, watch the BBC instead of American "news," but I'd have to always be averting my gaze from the culture I lived in. Long term, it just seems like a formula for extreme cognitive dissonance and psychological bad health.

And in any case, I don't think the relationship would work unless the woman was similarly disenchanted with American culture. Most of them don't want to hear anything about that stuff, though. This is the land of positive thinkers.
gsjackson
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 1469
Joined: Sat Jun 12, 2010 2:08 pm
Location: New Orleans, LA USA

Postby dsc » Tue Nov 02, 2010 8:12 pm

My interest in a life outside of my home country has never been about moving to another for the women.

It's more about living a freer life. Free of taxation planned properly (I'm Canadian), free of the tons of regulations from Canada, free of winter that we have for 4-5 months of the year.

If one had a portable business, one could live a simple life in an exotic, less expensive location and be happy.

This may or may not include a GF/wife in the foreign land.

I have enough interests, I could see myself living a full and satisfying life without a GF/wife -- whether it's in my home country or in another country.


If I met one of those rare 'good' women in my country, is really besides the point as this is not what I'm aiming for in my life.

I'm staying single and relatively free of possessions to facilitate my move when it is time.
dsc
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 34
Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2007 11:20 am

Postby dsc » Tue Nov 02, 2010 8:15 pm

I have a Brazilian/Canadian friend who loves to travel to Fortaleza every year.

He would love to move there permanently but he never will because his wife wants to stay put in Canada.

This is all too common for married people, I understand.

I would never limit my options in life by getting married here..
dsc
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 34
Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2007 11:20 am

Postby keius » Tue Nov 02, 2010 9:52 pm

Getting married in general limits your options. Having kids limits them even more. The states is just a place to make money and provide for my family. It's home....for the time being.

There are good things, like being a good environment to raise my kid, as long as it's a good local environment. Some places in the US are horrible. My wife wants to go back to living in China. She really doesn't like it here but she's here for the same reasons i'm here. Making money and our kid.

Anyway, i don't plan to stay here forever. We have a nice place in China and plan to retire there when the time comes assuming we are still together.

Although i'm fairly ok with my life, sometimes i do wonder if i'd be alot happier had i not gotten hitched. There wasn't a single person that
knows me (including family) who wasn't shocked when they found out i married.
My advice has ALWAYS been to not get hitched even if you really wanted a child. Look at Pitt and Jolie. No marriage and it's
working out fairly well. It's a shitty commitment if a piece of paper is the only thing keeping 2 people together.
I will admit, there are times i regret that i got married BUT i'd still be with her right now if we hadn't married.
How i will feel down the road is another matter :P
keius
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 259
Joined: Thu Jun 17, 2010 8:44 pm

Re: Question to everyone here....

Postby wuxi » Wed Nov 03, 2010 12:34 am

chanta76 wrote:Hi,

I have a question. I been reading these forums on and off. I think I have a sense of the type of guys who want to live over seas. Honestly I understand some of the reason but it seems like the main part of the reason to live over seas is because of the women.

I was wondering what if...you met a great woman in USA...not the stereotypical American woman but a devoted good woman. How many of you guys would stay in the states to be with this woman?

I mean it seems like many of the guys who post here have a hard time connecting with American women and the biggest reason to go overseas is for the traditional woman . But what if you meet a nice (I know it's rare but it can happen.) woman here in the states. I mean how many of you will stay?


That question is bullshit to begin with. Theres no such thing as a good american woman. Thats why this forum was invented.

If your a guy and you happen to be related to my mom and my sister chances are your not going to be too interested in marrying a white woman.
wuxi
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 277
Joined: Thu Aug 12, 2010 2:28 pm

Postby mrsesamechicken » Wed Nov 03, 2010 3:45 am

Remember, the website is called "HappierAbroad" not "HappierAbroadByFindindSex" There are many reasons as to why one would move to a different country (not just from the US standpoint).
mrsesamechicken
Freshman Poster
 
Posts: 16
Joined: Mon Jan 18, 2010 5:59 pm


Return to Questions and Advice

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest