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A HappierAbroad Forum idea

Post your suggestions and feedback for this site and movement. You can also report a problem or suggest new board topics.

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Carnio
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A HappierAbroad Forum idea

Post by Carnio » July 27th, 2018, 7:55 pm

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Last edited by Carnio on October 28th, 2019, 6:46 am, edited 1 time in total.




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GuyAbroad8293
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Re: a HappierAbroad Forum idea

Post by GuyAbroad8293 » July 27th, 2018, 8:13 pm

Well this forum isn't very active so what's the point in making new ones?
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Contrarian Expatriate
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Re: a HappierAbroad Forum idea

Post by Contrarian Expatriate » July 27th, 2018, 8:47 pm

Not at all a bad idea for those who desire less rumble and tumble.

However, the value in the back and forth you wrote of is in the fact that people learn differing approaches and different ideas from the debates. For example, I learned a great deal from Ladislav many years back. He was a well traveled person who had some insights that I found quite valuable. He and I traded barbs on a few occasions, but he was more so a model to emulate.

The "dick-policing" as you call it is the perfect name for the sexually competitive nature of men. I have found that there are generally three different types of dick police on the forum.

-Unhappily Married Men who wish to denigrate and discourage activity which deep down they wish they could enjoy. But since they can't, they attempt to demonize or criticize your sexual success out of pure envy.

-Sexually Frustrated Men who lament the fact that they cannot achieve any success abroad so they wish to rain on your parade so to speak. It manifests itself in comments like, "You really should not be having sex with girls 20 years your junior because it is not moral and you are hurting the girl." Some would call these types buzzkills.

-Ethnic or Racial Bigots who consider the sexual success of men different than themselves to be direct threats to their own sexual prospects. Sometimes these types use old cliches to try to create fear for certain men to keep them out of their hunting ground countries. For an example, there was one poster who did not realize that I have considerable experience in Kiev with women, yet he tried to dissuade me from going there by stating, "They are mega racist there, don't go!" I only laughed and looked at the fact that in that same post he complained that Kiev was too much for him. Well, misery loves company with these guys so if they fail, they are investing in seeing YOU fail too. Otherwise it highlights their own loser status when you thrive where they fail.

All in all, I thrive in reading the raucous fray. It makes me stronger in my views, or it provides me with alternative approaches that I have not yet considered.

The three types of posters above could all be called "haters" to varying degrees. That being the case, I wear their disdain as evidence of success. Men just have that competitive streak and scant few men will offer you a "good job!" instead of almost effeminate finger-wagging.

Yes, sometimes the posts do go over the top. I think that is a consequence of Winston's desire for this to be as close to free speech as possible. So while the specialized fora that you propose would certainly be more peaceful and harmonious, they might tend to turn into echo chambers of groupthink without contrarians (no pun intended) stirring the pot of ideas every now and then. My old boss told me that when he and I went toe to toe in policy disagreement, he considered it to be like 2 steel blades sharpening each other with friction. That is how I see the rough and tumble here.

But just to let it be known, I have about 10 of the more egregious posters on ignore and it has truly been as if they do not even exist.

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Winston
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Re: a HappierAbroad Forum idea

Post by Winston » July 28th, 2018, 9:00 am

Why not just create subforums and boards for each of those subtypes of HAers?

The thing is the old axiom applies. United we stand. A house divided cannot stand. If we were to split up into little fragmented group then this movement would be weakened and overly complicated. Not unified.

Some of those new forums may have no traffic too. Getting traffic is not easy. A new site cant just get traffic out of nowhere. There has to be familiarity and passion for people to post.

We all have in common that we prefer foreign women and friendlier saner cultures. So we have more in common than you think.

Sure there will always be people who want to tell others what to do. But that's human nature. What do you expect? People are judgmental by nature and like to criticize and lecture others. Its our human instinct. Perhaps it's a way of protecting and helping other members of the tribe.

The problem with giving advice though is that people can give bad advice. Especially if they dont understand you or are arrogant and think they know more than they do. You should always take advice from others with a grain of salt. Unless its someone you know and trust and respect.
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Winston
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Re: A HappierAbroad Forum idea

Post by Winston » July 28th, 2018, 9:09 am

Btw you cant deny that this is a very colorful eccentric group. Lol. And very unique for sure. You should appreciate though that we are all passionate about something or else we wouldnt post here. The free speech here creates a certain familiarity that you guys must be drawn to. Because nowhere else are you allowed to be yourself than here. Its like a strange validation and acceptance that you get here.

Free speech is a good principle. But it draws a lot of weird eccentric types too. Or maybe i draw them. And then it snowballs. Lol
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Cornfed
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Re: A HappierAbroad Forum idea

Post by Cornfed » July 28th, 2018, 9:12 am

All of the suggestions in the OP kind of fit into the current forum.

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Winston
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Re: A HappierAbroad Forum idea

Post by Winston » July 28th, 2018, 9:38 pm

I moved this thread to the Suggestions and Feedback board. The OP was wrong when he said there is no board category for his question. There obviously is. I don't get why he doesn't see the obvious.
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"It takes far less effort to find and move to the society that has what you want than it does to try to reconstruct an existing society to match your standards." - Harry Browne

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