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Discuss dating, relationships and foreign women.
4 posts • Page 1 of 1
Over the past several days, I have discovered dateinasia.com and been using it almost without stoppage. The relentless messages of "u so cute" and "u so handsome", along with the scores of Filipinas trying to chat with me on yahoo messenger at once had me in a joyous daze. Until a well-educated Indonesian women wrote this to me:
"hmmm some indonesians are gold diggers, but filipinas? almost all of them are, not only on this site, filipinas are looking for foreign spouses so that they can get visas. Im sorry to break this, but you shouldnt trust someone who havent even met yet. and come on, love? i know someone who met a girl off this site, they never met each other but the girl already told him she loves him? that sounds like a total BS to me"
The moment I read this, my buzz disappeared and I was left filled with shattering doubt. I consider myself a skeptical person but my judgement had been completely blinded by the joy of female attention. Which is bound to happen when you live in a country where women do not even glance at you in the street and dating sites are so that you have to send 100 messages to get one back which turns out to be an escort selling sex.
I mean, a site specifically for Asians to meet Westerners is obviously going to attract gold-diggers. But is all this talk of love and romance really just an act? Is Filipino women's interest ultimately due to the hope of obtaining a visa/money?
I'm just really hoping I can somehow get back to feeling and believing how I did yesterday, and that the recession keeps worsening so that I can never get a job and afford to travel and find out for certain what I already suspect, that women are hard-wired not to give a shit about men unless they want something from them.
Some will be looking for money and others a husband. You gotta know how to screen them and also don't put all your eggs in one basket. You need to converse with multiple girls and willing to meet them eventually. There are scammers everywhere but not all Filipinas are like that, only a minor percentage. Only fools with no common sense get taken for a ride so I'm assuming you just haven't fallen off the cart...
BTW, why you believe an Indonesian chick? I'm in Jakarta now and the women to me seem more dodgy here than in Philippines. At least in Philippines there is some cultural similarities to the West, in Indonesia we Westerners are infidels you know. The women are kinda cold here in comparison to Filipinas...
"The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane." Marcus Aurelius, Roman Emperor and stoic philosopher, 121-180 A.D.
I have had the same experience on Cherry Blossoms and there are several discussions on the forum about men's experiences there. There is in my experience a percentage of out and out scammers who will just chat with you and ask for money. But most of the girls legitimately want to get married to a Westerner.
Does that mean they are only green card chasing hos? I'm sure some are but you will find that the dynamics are more complex. Of course they want a better life which they hope will happen with a foreigner. And many genuinely want to get married, believe that by their 20s they are getting old, and find the local guys to be cheaters who cannot support a family.
As to the love thing, well I agree that falling in love over the Internet is silly but it does happen. Many of these girls are young and emotional and are looking for love and a better life. So don't be surprised if you are chatting with someone for a while and she does in fact fall for you.
OTOH, I certainly agree with the strategy of chatting with lots of girls. Do not put all your eggs in one basket.
What this Indonesian women didn't tell you is there is low demand for Indonesian women compared to Filipinas, it makes sense that she would be jealous. Filipinas basically outcompete all other women in just about any category. Theres dishonest women in any country but if you know what to look for and you trust your gut instinct you can easily pick them out. As a group, I think Filipinas are the most loyal women I've ever met.
You can send this link to your Indonesian friend, she won't be happy about it.
http://naughtynomad.com/2010/06/27/top- ... -s-e-asia/