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Rock, do most women like casual sex?

Discuss dating, relationships and foreign women.

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Postby adann » Sat Jun 23, 2012 3:10 am

Women in general are not into casual sex. If they were the brothel/red light industry wouldn't exist in any country, period. Men wouldn't need to visit these places to fulfill their sexual needs if women were willing to have casual sex with anyone including locals and foreigners.
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Postby davewe » Sat Jun 23, 2012 5:32 am

adann wrote:Women in general are not into casual sex. If they were the brothel/red light industry wouldn't exist in any country, period. Men wouldn't need to visit these places to fulfill their sexual needs if women were willing to have casual sex with anyone including locals and foreigners.


Sorry, but this is wildly untrue. Firstly many, though not all women like sex, casual and otherwise. Secondly, the existence of prostitution (which has existed in every culture for millennia) has very little to do with whether or not women like sex, again casual or otherwise. There is a huge laundry list of social reasons that prostitution exists that would fill up 10 threads, and in fact different cultures have different reasons. But way down on the list would be "women don't like sex".

Of course the very term "casual sex" is nonsensical. Personally I am not in the least casual about sex; I'm pretty damn serious about it, as are most guys here, otherwise they wouldn't talk about it so obsessively :)
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Postby Christianfilipinacom » Sat Jun 23, 2012 5:59 am

Winston wrote:LOL well then ironically, Tiger Woods could never use a dating site, because if he did, the moderators would automatically think that someone was using his photo fraudulently to get women's attention. LOL. Unless of course, he could somehow contact the owner of the site and prove his identity first. LOL


A few times a year we actually do have some musicians (not quite Tiger Woods level of fame, just nationally known Filipinos or from other countries) join our site and are actually the real people who they say they are. On first glance, of course, we thought, "scammer" - and other members report them as such as well - but we have enough experience now to be able tell often if a profile description, picture, and other details, matches or not, so we've investigated more closely, and it has been the real person.

But dozens of times a day scammers join our site using celebrity pictures.

The first time we had a scammer saying privately he was US Commander General Carter Ham, we were almost fooled into believing it, I won't go into the details why, but that scammer had a very sophisticated approach. Every thing we checked, checked out. It was not the typical Nigerian sophomore job. This was at the very beginning of the Ham scams (now you can just search for "General Carter Ham romance scam" and get a ton of hits) - the way we finally knew it was a scammer? The real Carter Ham is married.
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Postby Winston » Sat Jun 23, 2012 7:12 pm

davewe wrote:
adann wrote:Women in general are not into casual sex. If they were the brothel/red light industry wouldn't exist in any country, period. Men wouldn't need to visit these places to fulfill their sexual needs if women were willing to have casual sex with anyone including locals and foreigners.


Sorry, but this is wildly untrue. Firstly many, though not all women like sex, casual and otherwise. Secondly, the existence of prostitution (which has existed in every culture for millennia) has very little to do with whether or not women like sex, again casual or otherwise. There is a huge laundry list of social reasons that prostitution exists that would fill up 10 threads, and in fact different cultures have different reasons. But way down on the list would be "women don't like sex".

Of course the very term "casual sex" is nonsensical. Personally I am not in the least casual about sex; I'm pretty damn serious about it, as are most guys here, otherwise they wouldn't talk about it so obsessively :)


What is your evidence or reasoning that women like casual sex - meaning outside of a relationship?

In nearly 100 percent of profiles on dating sites, they ALL say that they are NOT into flings, intimate encounters or casual sex. Take a look at the profiles on PlentyofFish for example. All of them say they are not into that. Thus, going by what they say, they are not into casual sex.

Now, unless you have a logical valid reason as to why all the women on POF are lying...

Are you sure you aren't suffering that typical delusional Western white guy syndrome where for some reason you think:

- All women like casual sex outside of relationships.
- All women want you.
- Casual sex is easy to get.
- Everyone is wild. The world is wild and raunchy. No one is innocent. Every girl, including conservative ones, are horny as hell.

I don't see any evidence for the above, yet most Western white guys talk as though the above were all true. Why is that? It seems to be some kind of "locker room talk" or rumor with no logical objective basis.

Can you give some supporting arguments or reasons why you believe that most women are into casual sex and flings outside of committed relationships? Esp since nearly 100 percent of women on dating sites say otherwise?

Without the typical white guy big talk, can you give some logical sensible reasons?

I hate it when Western white guys always make baseless claims and big talk. It's highly illogical and bizarre.
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Postby davewe » Sat Jun 23, 2012 9:22 pm

Winston wrote:
davewe wrote:
adann wrote:Women in general are not into casual sex. If they were the brothel/red light industry wouldn't exist in any country, period. Men wouldn't need to visit these places to fulfill their sexual needs if women were willing to have casual sex with anyone including locals and foreigners.


Sorry, but this is wildly untrue. Firstly many, though not all women like sex, casual and otherwise. Secondly, the existence of prostitution (which has existed in every culture for millennia) has very little to do with whether or not women like sex, again casual or otherwise. There is a huge laundry list of social reasons that prostitution exists that would fill up 10 threads, and in fact different cultures have different reasons. But way down on the list would be "women don't like sex".

Of course the very term "casual sex" is nonsensical. Personally I am not in the least casual about sex; I'm pretty damn serious about it, as are most guys here, otherwise they wouldn't talk about it so obsessively :)


What is your evidence or reasoning that women like casual sex - meaning outside of a relationship?

In nearly 100 percent of profiles on dating sites, they ALL say that they are NOT into flings, intimate encounters or casual sex. Take a look at the profiles on PlentyofFish for example. All of them say they are not into that. Thus, going by what they say, they are not into casual sex.

I don't see any evidence for the above, yet most Western white guys talk as though the above were all true. Why is that? It seems to be some kind of "locker room talk" or rumor with no logical objective basis.

Can you give some supporting arguments or reasons why you believe that most women are into casual sex and flings outside of committed relationships? Esp since nearly 100 percent of women on dating sites say otherwise?


This is your typical MO. Make a subjective, open-ended statement, then demand that anyone logically disprove it. Anyone who has ever studied high school level logic knows that you cannot prove (or disprove) a subjective statement. In this case the subjective theory is "Women don't like casual sex." It's hard enough to define what casual sex is, let alone prove or disprove how many people like it. The only possibility is to use anecdotal evidence. In this case the anecdotal evidence would be as follows:

Loser #1: I have not gotten laid in two years therefore women obviously don't like casual sex.
Winner #1: I went to PI for a month, banged 10 girls who expected nothing from me other than a good time. Therefore women like casual sex.
Loser #1: I went on a dating website. All the girls said they wanted long term relationships. They had no interest in me. Therefore women don't like casual sex.
Winner #1: I went on an Asian dating website. Sure, all of them said they wanted a serious relationship leading to marriage. But in the meantime I banged five of them. Therefore women like casual sex.
Loser #1: I went to Asia and can't tell a girl from a ladyboy :)
Winner #1: I went to Asia and girls followed me from the time I hit the airport :)

What does either set of statements prove? Nothing. Some guys can find casual sex and some can't. Hell some guys can even get laid in the West, though most of us realize that's a tougher proposition.

I've said it before, Winston. You've put together a nice website with a reasonable philosophy - that traveling abroad solves many dating issues for Western men. But then you fail to follow your own advise and complain about your ability to find sex and sex partners. Worse still if someone has the temerity to suggest that he went to a country you struck out in and had success - you attack his assertions of success.

Seems to me you (and all of us) should be celebrating people's successes, not attacking them.

After all it's called Happier Abroad.
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Postby Winston » Sat Jun 23, 2012 9:41 pm

Davewe,
Your last post is illogical and irrelevant. And does not address my questions or your claims.

I don't care about anecdotal statements. I'm asking you to support YOUR assertion that most women are into "casual sex". We all know that "casual sex" here means sex outside of committed relationships (aka flings, one night stands, intimate encounters). You should have known that, instead of trying to obfuscate the issue with semantics. There was no confusion over the definition of "casual sex". Only YOU were confused about it.

Even POF has a definition for "casual sex" as "seeking intimate encounters" which members can select as one of the things they are looking for. Yet no female members seem to select that for some reason. Can you explain that, give your assertion that most women ARE into casual sex?

Now, given that definition, you said that adann's claim that "most women aren't into casual sex" is "wildly untrue" (your words). So you are claiming that "most women are into casual sex with men outside of relationships".

Is this correct? Why or why not?

If this is your claim, then please support your claim, esp when nearly 100 percent of the female profiles on POF claim otherwise. Otherwise, it's typical Western male locker room talk. Are you really that low, that you would parrot locker room talk on a serious forum?

Believe it or not, but one time I asked a successful male porn star, who had banged hundreds of women, about this and he told me that it is NOT in a woman's nature to have sex outside of relationships.

This is not about celebrating another's success. It's about logic and evidence. Please give some evidence and logic for your claim that most women are into casual sex outside of relationships, esp in light of overwhelming evidence to the contrary.

If you claim that all those millions of women on POF who claim that they are NOT looking for casual sex are all lying or not telling the truth, then please provide a valid reason or basis for that too.

Is that too hard? Why can't you answer honestly instead of obfuscating into irrelevancy? That's illogical.

Data from Star Trek the Next Generation, whose statements are 100 percent purely logical, would tell you the same thing.

Finally, you also fail to take into account that most western males BS and lie about their successes in money and women.

Please answer my questions correctly this time without obfuscation.

PS - Is there something wrong with your reading comprehension? I am not attacking Rock's unproven personal success (which are unproven but I am highly skeptical about). I am attacking his claim that the MAJORITY of men can easily pick up chicks in Taiwan, which I've demonstrated with a mountain of evidence (reasons, photos, letters) to be FALSE. I explained this to you in a long post already. Did you not see it? Why do you keep forgetting it? What is your problem? I thought you were a rational down to earth guy?
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Postby Dogboy86 » Sun Jun 24, 2012 12:03 am

Winston, women are illogical creatures driven by emotion and hormones. Why do you need them to fit inside your definitions and guide lines? Women will and do have casual sex inside and out of relationships. It comes down to risk versus reward. Some women may be in control of their drives but it dosnt mean they don't have them. They want the baby of the highest status male around them and their subconscious mind is constantly working out how to make that happen.

Your assertions about POF are way off Winston. Just because those women post they are not looking for casual sex dosnt mean anything. They are putting their best foot forward looking for Mr. Right with money in the bank, this dosnt mean they wount have sex with Mr. Right Now that pushes all their bottoms and gets them going. Its not black and white, just shades of gray...
"Never underestimate the predictability of stupidity"!!!
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Postby Winston » Sun Jun 24, 2012 12:13 am

Dogboy86 wrote:Winston, women are illogical creatures driven by emotion and hormones. Why do you need them to fit inside your definitions and guide lines? Women will and do have casual sex inside and out of relationships. It comes down to risk versus reward. Some women may be in control of their drives but it dosnt mean they don't have them. They want the baby of the highest status male around them and their subconscious mind is constantly working out how to make that happen.


Are you referring to most women or some women? Yes of course women are illogical creatures. But I see no evidence that the majority of women are into flings or one night stands, even with alpha males. Some are, sure. But the claim being made here is that most women are. What is the evidence for that? Outside of typical Western male locker room talk, which is weird and baseless, no one is presenting any.
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Postby davewe » Sun Jun 24, 2012 12:32 am

Winston wrote:Davewe,
Your last post is illogical and irrelevant. And does not address my questions or your claims.

I don't care about anecdotal statements. I'm asking you to support YOUR assertion that most women are into "casual sex". We all know that "casual sex" here means sex outside of committed relationships (aka flings, one night stands, intimate encounters).


I never said that "most women are into casual sex." It is your reading comprehension that is suspect. I questioned the poster who said that the existence of prostitution proved that women don't like casual sex.

I have no idea of what the percentage is and would imagine is varies dramatically from one culture to another, from one age to another, and from one moment to another. A woman who might not normally be into it might become into it when she is at a certain point in her cycle for example.

My only concern would be if men use this notion, that women don't like casual sex, as a justification for their own lack of success with women. It's up to you to determine whether you fall in that category - don't know don't care.

In my personal experience, which is after all most of what I care about, over the years enough women have wanted casual sex to keep me happy. YMMV.
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Postby Dogboy86 » Sun Jun 24, 2012 12:34 am

Seeing that most women are secretive about such things and a smart man never puts his girls on blast I don't think your going to get to the bottom of this very easily Winston.
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Postby Winston » Sun Jun 24, 2012 1:53 am

davewe wrote:
Winston wrote:Davewe,
Your last post is illogical and irrelevant. And does not address my questions or your claims.

I don't care about anecdotal statements. I'm asking you to support YOUR assertion that most women are into "casual sex". We all know that "casual sex" here means sex outside of committed relationships (aka flings, one night stands, intimate encounters).


I never said that "most women are into casual sex." It is your reading comprehension that is suspect. I questioned the poster who said that the existence of prostitution proved that women don't like casual sex.

I have no idea of what the percentage is and would imagine is varies dramatically from one culture to another, from one age to another, and from one moment to another. A woman who might not normally be into it might become into it when she is at a certain point in her cycle for example.

My only concern would be if men use this notion, that women don't like casual sex, as a justification for their own lack of success with women. It's up to you to determine whether you fall in that category - don't know don't care.

In my personal experience, which is after all most of what I care about, over the years enough women have wanted casual sex to keep me happy. YMMV.


Well then maybe you should have argued that women are picky, so some men have to visit prostitutes. Or you could argue that most women are into casual sex, but are very picky about who they have casual sex with. They certainly are picky.

What that poster said was:

Women in general are not into casual sex. If they were the brothel/red light industry wouldn't exist in any country, period. Men wouldn't need to visit these places to fulfill their sexual needs if women were willing to have casual sex with anyone including locals and foreigners.


As you can see, his main claim was that "Women in general are not into casual sex." Since you said it was "wildly untrue" I logically deduced that you were claiming that "Women in general are into casual sex."

Do you see what I mean?

Let's get real here. Nearly all women claim they are not into casual sex or one night stands, and that they hate guys who are. But sure, some of them could give in and put out if aroused enough. But women are picky. Most guys are not going to be able to arouse most women. So all in all, casual sex is not easy to get.

Btw, why are you using that avatar of Orson Wells? Your other avatar was of you as a chubby bald older man with a black lady. How could you possibly look like that and claim that you've gotten plenty of casual sex? That doesn't make sense.
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Postby davewe » Sun Jun 24, 2012 2:38 am

Winston wrote:
Btw, why are you using that avatar of Orson Wells? Your other avatar was of you as a chubby bald older man with a black lady. How could you possibly look like that and claim that you've gotten plenty of casual sex? That doesn't make sense.


Hmmm. I'm a little bit creeped out that you remember what I looked like from a pic I haven't used in my avatar in maybe six months - lol.

So now your great logical mind has broken down and you wish to resort to personal insults? I'd say this is beneath you but clearly it isn't.

I have nothing to hide, am not an agent for anything and a number of people on this forum are Facebook friends of mine, and can see not only what I look like, but what my gf looks like as well.

Winston, you ought to go back to your own writings. They extoll the virtues of international dating and some of those virtues are that guys who don't look like Brad Pitt, are not young and are not rich, can get women - for relationships or even for casual sex. Frankly I had discovered that fact before I discovered HA. It was the very fact that I had had several younger foreign girlfriends that lead me to search for the realities, which led me here.

Unlike some guys I had had some level of female success in my home country: marriages and girlfriends and women who were typically nice looking. But I was never happy with them. Their attitude sucked and ultimately the relationship would blow up because of it. When I discovered the sweetness of foreign women it was a revelation that I wanted to pursue.

As to how I have managed to have at least a modicum of success with women both at home and abroad, I assume you were being sarcastic and you really were not sincerely asking the question. If you were genuinely asking I would say that a mature man can have an arsenal including wit, charm, intelligence, humor, kindness, success, a bit of money, and a mature attitude toward life. Either that or he might also have an uncommonly big Johnson :)
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Postby Christianfilipinacom » Sun Jun 24, 2012 8:22 am

Winston, Almost every man and woman wants a whole lot of things but knows that there are consequences for their actions such that they cannot eat their cake and have it too. Of course apparently alcohol/drug use is a common way people try to overcome that "consequences" issue.

One funny story on this topic, there was one couple I knew (mature people, over 40) - when they met she was trying to find out how much money he made in some way; he said "he never has to worry about money" which she took to mean one thing and they then had a relationship for a long time with one unexpected twist. The reason the guy never had to worry about money was because he lived with his mother and somehow had good luck with credit card companies such that he had accumulated way more than I thought was possible, unfortunately though his credit had run out.
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Postby Winston » Mon Jun 25, 2012 9:03 pm

Davewe,
There's something else we forgot to consider - Evolutionary Biology. As we've discussed here before, women are hardwired NOT to have casual sex too freely because if they have many children without fathers, then they will be screwed. So for survival's sake, they are hardwired to be more choosy than men about who they have sex with. Thus the argument from evolutionary biology, which says that women are NOT hardwired for casual sex, is a very big argument AGAINST your claim that most women like casual sex (one night stands, flings, etc.)

So in summary, two big arguments go against your argument:

1. The argument from evolutionary biology that women are not hardwired for casual sex.
2. The fact that every female profile on dating sites (such as POF) says that they are not looking for intimate encounters or casual sex outside of relationships.

Those are two biggies. What are your arguments to the contrary?

I think we can logically conclude that women are not actively or consciously looking for casual sex, though they can be tempted into it of course. And of course, we all know that women are far MORE choosy and picky about who they have sex with, than men are. They are far more inhibited and usually require love and commitment first before they will give a man sex, in accord with their hardwiring. Of course, some women do have casual sex. But either way, getting casual sex for a man is NOT easy (except for prostitutes and really poor or desperate women of course). I'm sure we can all agree on that.

Any dispute with the above Davewe?
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Postby Winston » Mon Jun 25, 2012 9:06 pm

davewe wrote:
Winston wrote:
Btw, why are you using that avatar of Orson Wells? Your other avatar was of you as a chubby bald older man with a black lady. How could you possibly look like that and claim that you've gotten plenty of casual sex? That doesn't make sense.


Hmmm. I'm a little bit creeped out that you remember what I looked like from a pic I haven't used in my avatar in maybe six months - lol.

So now your great logical mind has broken down and you wish to resort to personal insults? I'd say this is beneath you but clearly it isn't.

I have nothing to hide, am not an agent for anything and a number of people on this forum are Facebook friends of mine, and can see not only what I look like, but what my gf looks like as well.

Winston, you ought to go back to your own writings. They extoll the virtues of international dating and some of those virtues are that guys who don't look like Brad Pitt, are not young and are not rich, can get women - for relationships or even for casual sex. Frankly I had discovered that fact before I discovered HA. It was the very fact that I had had several younger foreign girlfriends that lead me to search for the realities, which led me here.

Unlike some guys I had had some level of female success in my home country: marriages and girlfriends and women who were typically nice looking. But I was never happy with them. Their attitude sucked and ultimately the relationship would blow up because of it. When I discovered the sweetness of foreign women it was a revelation that I wanted to pursue.

As to how I have managed to have at least a modicum of success with women both at home and abroad, I assume you were being sarcastic and you really were not sincerely asking the question. If you were genuinely asking I would say that a mature man can have an arsenal including wit, charm, intelligence, humor, kindness, success, a bit of money, and a mature attitude toward life. Either that or he might also have an uncommonly big Johnson :)


I'm sorry. No insult was intended. I just can't figure out how you can get casual sex so easily in the US, when I've been trying to for many years with no success? It was a serious question, not meant to insult or ridicule you. Sorry if it came off that way.

Dogboy86 wrote:Winston, women are illogical creatures driven by emotion and hormones. Why do you need them to fit inside your definitions and guide lines? Women will and do have casual sex inside and out of relationships. It comes down to risk versus reward. Some women may be in control of their drives but it dosnt mean they don't have them. They want the baby of the highest status male around them and their subconscious mind is constantly working out how to make that happen.

Your assertions about POF are way off Winston. Just because those women post they are not looking for casual sex dosnt mean anything. They are putting their best foot forward looking for Mr. Right with money in the bank, this dosnt mean they wount have sex with Mr. Right Now that pushes all their bottoms and gets them going. Its not black and white, just shades of gray...


Yes I agree, some women will give casual sex to a guy whom they consider a great catch. Not all though. But the point is, it is NOT easy to get casual sex with them. And we all know that it is far more easy for a woman to get casual sex than it is for a man. So men and women are NOT equal in this regard. I don't think anyone would disagree with that. This is my main point.

However, given that, just because some women will have casual sex with a guy they really like, doesn't mean that most women will. You can't prove that. Also, the older and less attractive a woman gets, the more willing she will be to have sex and the lower her standards will be and the less she will be hung on looks. I'm sure we all know that too.
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