Join John Adams, world renowned Intl Matchmaker, Monday nights 8:30 EST for Live Webcasts!
And check out Five Reasons why you should attend a FREE AFA Seminar! See locations and dates here.
View Active Topics View Your Posts Latest 100 Topics FAQ Topics Mobile Friendly Theme
Discuss dating, relationships and foreign women.
11 posts • Page 1 of 1
I've done some detective work and signed up for some newsletters from some "Sex and the City - Carrie Bradshaw" wannabes. Here's what one told me sbout "aplha" males. Notice how women always reduce things to "5 signs" or "5 errors" which clearly doesn't work out in real life!!
1) When socializing and talking, he often talks in a way that puts other people down. For me, there really is no faster indication that this man has a very weak masculine energy. Not only because heâ€™s insecure, thatâ€™s not even half of the reason! The reason why this is a sure-fire indicator that a man is not an alpha male is because alpha males are far more centered and focused than that! In order to look to put others down indirectly or directly, it just shows his lack of ability to focus and the lack of direction in his life.
Men who have a sense of mission, and who are focused, donâ€™t have the brain space to look for ways to gossip and TALK about how other people are less than, or are losers.
Plus, lengthy discussion and gossip is something women do. Look out for this one. I really canâ€™t stand men who gossip in a way that puts other down; because I can feel their lack of authenticity.
Sure, sometimes we all have to gossip and maybe tell it like it is; but thereâ€™s a difference between telling it like it is and having most of what comes out of your mouth be a put down or criticism of other people. Gossip is a form of sharing of feminine energy â€“ not a strong masculine energy.
2) Other women donâ€™t pay attention, and arenâ€™t interested in listening to him when he speaks.
An alpha male more often than not, has the ability to engage people and is not afraid to engage people. Always take a man out with some of your girlfriends. Firstly; if he cares about you; he wonâ€™t avoid it.
If he just wants sex, heâ€™ll try to avoid it. If he comes along, observe what heâ€™s like with your friends. Itâ€™s not a secret that if a man is standing and talking, and a few women are looking at him, his attractiveness to women automatically goes up incredibly, studies have proved this, and it is in the subconscious female mind.
Itâ€™s a kind of â€˜pre-selectionâ€™; ie: other women are willing to give him the time of day; other women like him, which means A LOT in the female mind when it comes to choosing the best man. It also helps you feel more secure choosing him.
3) He seeks approval. A big one.
Any man with a strong masculine energy will listen to a womanâ€™s opinion, but take it in to consideration.
An alpha male is so strong in his choices; and he is so stable in his own choices that other peopleâ€™s opionion only count for so much. HIS choices matter the most.
If heâ€™s seeking approval from other women especially, then observe carefully.
The way I learned this was through my ex. This is a very extreme example. Itâ€™s almostâ€¦.too weird to share. But Iâ€™m ok with that.
I used to have to reassure him that his jeans looked ok on him. Not once. Not even twice, and no, not thrree times, but over and over again.
See, I know what a bad idea it is to be the man in a relationship when it isnâ€™t natural for you (and it definitely wasnâ€™t natural for me). No wonder I couldnâ€™t stand him; I stayed because I didnâ€™t know any better. AND because I thought it was cool to have everything â€˜under controlâ€™. Thank Goodness I now know better.
4) He never knows where his keys and wallet are.
You can test this out with a (literal) and fun test, if you are far along enough in the dating process to be able to do this. Have his back turned to where his keys and wallet are and in a playful and excited voice; ask him: â€œwithout looking around, where are your keys? And also where is your watch?â€
Are you wondering what this has to do with anything? Well; A LOT! Think about itâ€¦.masculine energy is very directed. A man canâ€™t be a hunter, or fight at war, or take charge of anything if his mind and eyes are lazy and wandering all over the place; he has to have some sort of direction.
I donâ€™t care how long ago men were hunters; it is in their DNSA, males have (over the course of millions and millions of years) trained themselves to properly and efficiently hunt.
And a man who is mostly living in his masculine energy and who has a strong masculine energy, will KNOW where he keeps his keys! Why? Because his keys are the reason he can GO or drive anywhere, in the direction he wants to go.
If he loses things all the time; do you feel good? Do you trust him? Or do you just think heâ€™s cute?
Remember that masculine energy is directional â€“ it knows where itâ€™s going; and if it doesnâ€™t, it finds out â€“ or pretends to know, at least for that moment A man with a weaker masculine energy most of the time; wonâ€™t mind you telling him where to go, and heâ€™ll relax and enjoy that. An alpha male or a very masculine man will probably ignore you instead if you tried. And thank goodness! Finally! A man you can respect!
5) The complainer. You already knew that in your gut though, didnâ€™t you? The man who complains about work, about his boss, about his ex, about his mother, and his father.
The man who has a bad shoulder and goes on and on about it. Oh, and ENJOYS telling the story of how bad it is and how it happened over and over and over and over again.
Complaints complaints complaints.
Soâ€¦..Where or when does he have any time to actually take the problem at hand and deal with it?
WELL. Heâ€™s not even looking to deal with the problem. He just wants to blurt a bunch of complaints out. Good for him! But maybe not so good for you if you want a passionate relationship with him!
Talking through things and being hurt and upset or even complaining is what you and I do together, as women, because our natural feminine instinct is not to solve any problems. Connection is the lifeblood of the feminine.
We just need to connect, talk, and 2 hours later; WAH-LA! We feel better, and itâ€™s like that other problem didnâ€™t exist. (what was the original problem again??)
The bounce returns to our step and we are ready to move on to the next thing. If a man is more towards the alpha male on a spectrum of Beta -> Alpha, then he will not complain, but rather, eliminate (move away from), or SOLVE the problem.
Not solving the problem makes him feel like less of a man.
I'm stupefied. Women really TALK about this stuff?
Anyway, I suggest you young guys pay heed to the article. It is DEAD ON.
It is a righteous thing to learn from the enemy.
--Old Roman saying.
First of all, why should I listen to what this bimbo has to say ?
Second of all, any male that isn't retarded knows that you should never listen to what a woman says because they say one thing and do another. So taking advice from a woman on how to be a man is the worst possible thing you can do. No wonder that men who grow up without a father are such pussies.
But not every man is perfect, and every man has some faults. If women use this as a criteria in determining whether he is "a man" or not, she will rule out just about every man in existence. This is not good in a society where women want the best of everything, especially when hyper-masculinity is promoted by Hollywood as the normal way to be "a man"
alpha vs beta is a false dichtomy. if you conform to the beleif that it is real, you are automatically subservient to it. the only thing women love more than an "alpha", is a total non conformist. only then are you a true leader, sure of yourself and what you say and not subservient to anyone elses rules or beleifs. none of us possess the capacity to conform without the beleif that there is something to conform to. you will never be fully confident when conforming to the lie that you have something to lose. conforming to truth, that is that the world is a series of phenomena all happening at once with no inherent basis, gives you the understanding there is nothing to lose and with it the ultimate confidence and authority. then you will not need women and they will be drawn to you.
I was expecting this to be some bullshit about large biceps, but it's not a bad article. Do you put people down and are you a whiny, complaining bitch? Then you ARE "beta" and women will NOT like you and it has nothing to do with evil feminist culture and everything to do with YOU.
The flip side is that many women see "alpha" as more about appearance. If you're a huge ass biker who looks mean as hell, those pretty little country girls who ignore the skinny will guys will suddenly get moist between the legs.
I'd be a lot happer if it really was more about personality characteristics. I suppose it is, but only among the more developed women. We can change personality characteristis more easily than we can try to fake some type of superficial appearance. To really be that 'badass' you have to go to jail for 3 years and kill a guy in the prison shower... and I'm not going to go through all of that to get tail in my country ;p