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Discuss dating, relationships and foreign women.
I admit when I was in china I only dated 1 girl but had 2 interested, but one of them was...not good looking in the least...
Mostly I would agree Chinese women are not the route to go if you want a quick relationship but what I've gathered is...it's a better numbers game in china then here even with the outnumbered women, at least if your a westerner.
I not only got something started in 3 days that lasted 3 months long distance, I almost got married after my second trip.
The main point here is, it depends on the girl and it's a thin line you have to take with westernized and traditional Chinese girls......the problem is mostly the westernized girls will date you who are really not what your looking for and the traditional chinese girls won't date you...at least I wouldn't think without knowing you a long time.
With my ex I did pull some western moves that not even I have done before, like kissing my girl friend the same day we met, but I was pinched for time...in the end I should have maybe thought about that.....a girl who would kiss you on the first day...might not be a great girl to start a relationship with.
I worry about returning to china....and staying single, you have to ask your self, if you remain single in china is better than being single in America, perhaps, at least you'll retain your sanity.
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Repeating this nonsense won't make it true either.
When I was in the Philippines, we once lived in a nice subdivision. It looked like any suburb in California if you're INSIDE it. Right outside it, though, was the poverty often seen there. Right on the wall there was this old man who lived in a shack, which he obviously built himself. I use the word built liberally as it was far from a complete building. They had no electricity or running water. He had a few beautiful daughters. One of them used to come over and clean our house regulalry. He was pushing 70. He also had a young, pretty wife, in her twenties, not much older than his daughters, and a new baby.
Now, based on what people say here, this guy should have been throwing his daughters at me and my friend for marriage. The oldest was gorgeous and I was very interested in her and her in me. She told me to talk to her father about us dating, so I did. He would not allow it, and she eventually ended up with a short, dark local guy who looked poor as hell.
The house we lived in, rented, was owned by a local man in his 50's. He was in decent shaped and notnat all bad looking. His wife was in her 20's and gorgeous. She was the sweetest, most down to earth person you could meet.
The guy selling peanuts on the side of the road or pan de sal in a small stand had much younger wives. and note that I am talking about LOCALS! It is SO common that I can't imagine why anyone would think that the US way is the way women behave everywhere. I could on and on with more examples from my own life and experience, meaning things I saw with my own eyes and people we knew personally, but people here will CHOOSE not to believe it so they can safely stay in their bubble.
Professor is simply butthurt because of HIS bad experience in China. At the same time, though, he is not TOTALLY wrong. A girl wanting to marry a guy with a house and car is not some spoiling from westernization. It has been like that for millennia here. The reason is, no matter how much the girl wants it, HER PARENTS DECIDE, in the end, who she can marry. No parent is going to let their girl marry a guy who doesn't have a house, as that signals he can't take care of their ONLY CHILD.
Most girls want marriage. They date like western people and certainly don't want flings. They are not going to waste their time on someone they ALREADY KNOW their parents won't approve.
POOR GUYS have options here. Why? Because their parents struggled and saved all their lives and will BUY them a house when they are ready to marry. EVERY SINGLE friend or classmate of my wife, who married in the last two years, is a normal local guy with a regular job, making not more than $500 per month, usually a lot less. They have a house, every one of them, because of their parents. Foreigners don't have this luxury. Foreigners also can't walk into a bank and get a mortgage on a house. They would have to buy out of pocket, which puts them at a disadvantage.
English teachers don't have the clout they once did. There have been far too many articles, videos and other news on the web painting them in a bad light. Girls will not throw themselves at them like ten years ago. Everyone knows what their salary range is. Everyone knows that almost NONE will stay here. Today, an English teacher will have to.prove that he is SOMEBODY before doors open. Anyone serious about making a life here can easily do that.
It is YOUR CHOICE if you want to believe the US controls the world mentality and that girls here are the same as those back home. You can trap yourself in a box or get out and DO something for yourself. If I listened to all the people who told me black guys can't do well in Korea, I would not have gone there. I went there and DID WELL, and saw many black guys in the clubs and on the street, in the popular spots, doing well.
MAKE YOUR OWN STORY. Stop believing others.
“b***y is so strong that there are dudes willing to blow themselves up for the highly unlikely possibility of b***y in another dimension." -- Joe Rogan
Actually...no. I'm not sleeping with her. And she doesn't want to go to the United States; she wants to stay in China. She asked me the same question: about whether I want to stay in China/Asia or the United States? I told her I went to stay in China for a few more years or move to another part of Asia.
She did tell me she would not move to S. Korea because of the language barrier, though.
She's been to the U.S. (California) before and was not impressed. ...
I'm not sure whether she is inexperienced with men or not...but I do know she's very cautious about holding hands, kissing, and the like. She only started doing that with me after a couple of dates, and not before. Which likely means she's not some kind of tramp or loose women--thankfully!
Congratulations Zboy! How did you ask her how and get her to be initially interested you?
Sorry I couldn't find a previous thread or post mentioning how you did it. But again, congrats!
Thanks Falcon! I used ChineseLoveLinks to get dates while in China. It's been pretty useful so far, considering the number of dates I've been on, thanks to that site.
Just curious but what's your rate of interest clicks in China? How many dates have you been on since being in China?
I would just like to compare this with Thailand and the Philippines for my own curiosity.
Happy how China goes for u man! We might all end up being married to chinese ladies after all lol.
Xiongmao uses the same website.
But have you gotten any results in "real" life (i.e., not the Internet)? Urban Chinese women are generally more difficult to initiate dating with than rural Southeast Asian women.
Yes, but at a much lower rate than dating on the Internet. I've gotten only two dates from cold approaches with Chinese females; they don't respond very well to that, for some reason. ...
I get tons of clicks on ChineseLoveLinks daily. But, I don't think Chinese females can even be compared, romantically, to Filipino women in the least; Chinese females are too robotic, materialistic, and unemotional--both romantically and physically--in comparison to Filipino women, in my opinion.
I think language barrier has a lot to do with this. I chat up mainland women in person with mandarin and they tend to soften up. I really should put China down on my travel schedule..but man living in China is such a hassle. I have to think about it. Maybe i'll come see you Zboy what do you think about that?
Yes, soon half of all HA members will end up with a Chinese wife, LOL.
Oh okay. Good for you both. I don't think Chinese and Korean women are that different. But women like to make emotional leaps while the hype is still there...
hey Zboy, save a hottie wit ha heart of gold for me will ya!
Well Zboy despite your comment about it being hard to find Chinese girls to date, would you say on a English teachers wage your not going to be date worthy material because of income?
And on that flip side, would my age be considers too old to date younger ladies?
When I was in china I struggled to ways to meet Chinese girls much in the same way as the US, I attempted to use sites and elder people telling them to introduce me to ladies thinking that might be a better way to go about it, but it didn't pan out.
perhaps you can give me a few pointers, or explain how you met your perhaps to be wife!
Posts like this fill me with hope.
Being an English teacher is not considered 'menial' by any means...it's actually considered a decent profession, reputation-wise in China.
I met my most of my dates on ChineseLoveLinks/WorldFriends and QQ/Wechat. As Kai1275 has mentioned before...if you're in China, you will need to use QQ and Wechat to communicate with females here...
Yes, Chinese women are difficult to meet and date; I don't know why that is?...Is it because Chinese female standards are too high?; is it because most Chinese females just aren't interesting in dating?; or is it because Chinese females shun cold approaches and prefer to get dates through their friends, parents or in groups?
You have to remember, the concept of Western-style dating is abnormal in China; Chinese females will only go on dates with men they see as 'marriage material,' not for one-night stands like Western hoes, unless their 'Americanized or Westernized' like Asian American females. ...