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Discuss dating, relationships and foreign women.
I'm either on the cusp of making the biggest mistake of my life or one of the best decisions I've ever made.
I'm planning to try to find a Filipina wife online and bring her back to the US. I've been doing some research about this and this is my read on the situation. Please brutally burst my bubble if I'm delusional and being a total fool.
My intention is to find a wife who will raise our children. I'm a decently attractive white guy with blonde hair (I know the Japanese like that...but do the Filipinas?). I'm 34 and make good money. From what I've read, there are a lot of Filipina women who are looking for someone like me and they want to move to the US.
Now some people will say that they're only green card hunters. But my question is so what? I've taken the red pill and am totally jaded towards American women. I don't have high expectations. I'm looking for a woman who will raise my children with me and that's about it. I don't believe in the Disney fairy tale notion of love. I'm looking for a practical partnership that will last my whole life.
I don't see the problem with a woman from a poor country using her beauty to try to raise her station. In evolutionary terms it makes perfect sense. She is doing what she can to ensure her genetic code is replicated in the most favorable environment. She's meeting her evolutionary prerogative.
All I want is a woman who will have my children and NOT get it in her head that she can do without me and raise them by herself like feminist propaganda will tell her it's her right to do.
So I see this as an equal exchange. She gives me healthy children and I take care of her financially and improve her station in life. If we have a little sex mingled in there every now and again, it's a bonus.
Am I deluded in my thinking here guys? How dangerous is my plan?
Very doable and not very dangerous if you choose wisely. If you can, go to Phils long enough to find a girl you are initially interested in, court her, and fully test her in the process. If all goes well, then you have found a keeper. If not, rinse and repeat until you find one who can go the distance in the initial testing stage.
The deal is with your current mental state, you are going to be open to a lot of scammers. There is a big difference from a girl looking to improve her situation and a girl who has only money on her mind. The latter may cheat, steal, divorce you, and go back to her family when she gets that green card. If you have a weak state of mind and very low expectations then you will have a huge target on your head.
If your basis is simply for the girl to have your kids and be a good parent then that's practically the majority of filipinas and you will not have a hard time at all finding that. In essence go find you one of the millions of maids that the country has. I'm assuming you have some preference for looks, mentality needs to be somewhat compatible, and she needs to have some intelligence to her. We have different preferences from what we would consider an ideal mate so I am finding your situation really hard to relate to.
HouseMD gave you good advice. You can find good ones online if you are very patient and smart, but the best bet is finding them once you land. If you are able I'd definitely visit the country a time or two, date around, experience the culture, get your mind away from western mentality, and make connections before you jump the gun. Marriage is a big decision that you shouldn't take lightly.
Your best bet is to find someone who has done it successfully. I would volunteer Pete. He mentored me and a number of others. There is a difference between going to the Philippines for fun, adventure and lots of girls, and what you are looking for. There's a lot to learn, and certainly a few land mines to avoid, but it can be done.
So, you're not deluded (well, except in wondering whether they're like the Japanese )
Oh, and one other delusion - thinking there's only going to be a little sex mingled in. Start taking your vitamins.
BTW, you can contact me too.
Check out my blog @ http://www.marriedafilipina.com
That's interesting that you think I have a weak state of mind. What about it do you think is weak? And feel free to rip it apart with no mercy -- I can take it.
Thanks, I'll take you up on that. Who's Pete?
Perhaps "weak" wasn't the term I should have used. My point mainly was that by your post you seem to have bare minimum qualities you will settle for, and that that mentality isn't probably the best approach in finding a reasonable mate in the Philippines. I don't know you or your situation, I was just going by the vibe of the post. It kind of had a defeatist theme or that of a "the last resort" solution. Perhaps I'm am wrong, but Dave is right, you should contact some of the guys who have actually married a girl they met online. I have a lot of experience doing the online thing but not necessarily marriage minded at the moment.
I think your read on me is pretty accurate. Where I'm from (midsized town WI) I have no good options datingwise. All the good women are married and all that is left over is either single moms, fat, or trouble. I haven't been too successful with women and now that I'm financially successful I don't think it's worth the considerable risk to try marrying an American woman. The statistics are that 70% of divorces in America are initiated by women.
A couple years ago I made up my mind to stay single for the rest of my life. I'm not the kind of guy who needs a woman. I'm perfectly happy being alone. I would be content with my decision if it weren't for the real fact that every year I get older, the harder being single is going to be. Sure, right now in my mid thirties it's no problem. But I foresee a time when I'll be in a position where I wished I had built a family for myself as my social support structures begin to die.
So I think you're right that I'm in last resort mode. I guess I just don't understand why this is a problem and I don't understand how this puts me in danger and what to do about it. I have a gut feeling that I'm not on the right path yet so I appreciate your feedback.
Check out my blog @ http://www.marriedafilipina.com
I'm checking out your blog. I"ve read one post and it was fantastic. It looks like a very valuable resource. Thanks for putting it up.
No, you are not out of your mind at all. You now realize that you have better options by dating foreign women. Take your time and enjoy the country.
If you need advice, there are plenty of guys here that can guide you in the right direction.
Men chase, women choose
As long as you have gold in your hand, you will ALWAYS have bread on your table.
Realistically, how much time do I have to spend in the Philippines to pull something like this off? It would be very tricky for me to run my business there. It would be hard for me to be there for longer than a month at a time. If it's an absolute must to stay longer I can probably work around it but it will be very difficult.
Haven't guys written a plethora of information on the subject of meeting Pinay's?. All he would have to do is read, wouldn't he?