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Lets not kid ourselves. Women are the same everywhere.

Discuss dating, relationships and foreign women.

Moderators: jamesbond, fschmidt

Re: Lets not kid ourselves. Women are the same everywhere.

Postby Jester » Sat Dec 06, 2014 9:31 am

hammanta wrote:
lozoman wrote:Lets all just get our head out of the clouds. Yes, foreign women may be better in terms of being more mature, friendly and down to earth. But in terms of sleeping with and dating them, they are just as difficult. Im willing to bet this is especially the case with European women (which is a real shame, as I personally find them to be the most attractive.) Some other posters on here have said that this site is just a bunch of hype and that getting foriegn women isnt nearly as easy as the people who run this site make it seem. Of course Winston Wu will NEVER admit this as he is trying to sell us something and scammers never admit to scamming you. I think it would be better if we all just accept that ALL women, regardless of what country theyre from are awful. That will save all us pathetic womenless men time, money and disappointment.


I can somewhat agree with this but here's my mentality.

Guys who do well overseas but fail in the US have the nice guy persona. Have probably been screwed over by an American women or 10 and want a good down to earth female. They are generally average to goodlooking, can tolerate change, relatively level headed, and just need a different cultural environment to truly succeed. They can be at times push overs but have little trouble getting along socially with others. They need a place where women are not as standoffish and who can appreciate a man that isn't an Alpha D-bag. This of course is a generalization.

Then you have the guys that are social misfits. A lot of times they tend to be just socially awkward, unfortunately ugly, incredibly shy, have some kind of perpetual self admiration or delusion, or have completely unrealistic ideals for the opposite sex. They travel abroad thinking women will just throw themselves at them because they are a foreigner and are perceived to have money. Through watching too much p**n they succumb to the belief in stereotypes and desire what they've come to know. Usually they have no desire to adapt to the new culture or learn the local language. They spend their time in bars with similar guys complaining how all the women suck or stay home all night scanning through online profiles looking for the hottest chick, only to end up getting scammed. The problem isn't them they tell themselves.

Of course those are merely generalizations and guys can fall into different categories or straddle the line between the two. Guys who do well overseas generally COULD do well in the USA if they adapted the Alpha male mindset. Guys in the latter category need to improve themselves before going anywhere.

Heres two scenarios :

Guy A is a 30 year old overweight virgin who spends most of his time online playing games and scanning the web. He lacks a solid friend base and usually stays home on weekends. He's never been good with the ladies and tends to be very shy. He comes across HA and wants to try his luck overseas because he's lonely. He lands in China where he doesn't speak the language and knows little about the culture. Trys to meet women online but do to his lack of social skills, he fails miserably. Pisses and moans before heading back home.

Guy B is a 30 year old average looking guy who is tired of being pushed around and cheated on. He has a solid friend base and enjoys being social. He wonders why all the women he meets treat him wrong. Meeting girls at bars just isn't his cup of tea. He doesn't like being aggressive and prefers a more laid back and honest approach. He decides American women aren't for him and wants to try his luck abroad.

Guy B has a better chance at succeeding overseas. He's sociable, experienced with women and isn't shy towards them.

People need to learn to play to their strengths and acknowledge that they may need to improve on some things. Not every guy is born looking like Brad Pitt or has the personality of Seth Rogen. There are some guys that need to just accept that they were dealt bad hands in the looks department. That doesn't mean they should give up on women and blame the world, but they need to do things to improve themselves. For 1, stop falling for whores that please you visually.

Another, be proactive. If yah fail, try, try again. I swear the amount of ugly to average guys I've seen even in the US with pretty attractive girls is astonishing. It's because they probably weren't drowning in self despair. You may hand out your number 100 times but if you get 3 calls back to me it would be worth it. As soon as one acknowledges the fact that they are ugly, fat, have a bad personality, are a loser or whatever, is when they can start from a working level to improve themselves.


Thanks for articulating this, Hammanta.

It may seem basic but a lot of guys need this.
"Pick a point and go to it."
-- Dr John Hunsucker, speaking about canoeing on Georgia's Lake Lanier, with its irregular shape, and 1000 miles of meandering shoreline
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Re: Lets not kid ourselves. Women are the same everywhere.

Postby MarcosZeitola » Sat Dec 06, 2014 3:48 pm

Yohan wrote:Yes, it is correct, about myself, I am originally from Austria (EU), native German speaker, but living in Asia since around 1972, (Malaysia) and since about 1976 I am living in Japan with Japanese wife and 2 daughters (now adults already 38 and 33), and there is also a foster daughter, who is a Filipina from Eastern Mindanao, but living in Cebu, university student and she is now 19.


A bit of an off-topic question, Yohan, but I sometimes heard Japanese women have gotten very career driven in the latest decade(s) or so. Would you say your adult daughters are more career driven, or more family oriented as opposed to most Japanese women their age? I can imagine things went down hill quite a bit if you compare your wife's generation to your daughters' generation.

You seem like a pretty level-headed and somewhat traditional man, so how have you managed to raise a stable and traditional family in a country with some of the world's lowest birth rates and so many young men and women opting out of marriage and parenthood? I wonder just how much of a future the nuclear family (and more specifically: your own nuclear family) has in such a society.
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Re: Lets not kid ourselves. Women are the same everywhere.

Postby droid » Sat Dec 06, 2014 4:20 pm

These are the quality posts and replies this forum needs
+1
Last edited by droid on Fri Dec 12, 2014 6:48 pm, edited 2 times in total.
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
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Re: Lets not kid ourselves. Women are the same everywhere.

Postby lozoman » Fri Dec 12, 2014 6:44 pm

lasttry wrote:And you, newbgold, are feeding Lozoman dreams that will make him more depressed in the long run. Lozoman writes that he is "nearly 28 and have still never been in a relationship or been on a date". He probably has some combination of shyness and sexual hangups that pretty much ensures he will never get a date, regardless of whether he is 5'10", 6'10" or anywhere in between. The first step on the road to progress is to lose his virginity, and the way to do that is P4P. A guy who can't even get a date in the US, much less get sex or a long-term relationship is very unlikely to do much better in Europe. In the Philippines, sure, his shyness and sexual hangups won't be a problem. The girls will do all the work. But then we all know that these girls are basically semi-pros, right? So we're back to P4P.

The truth is depressing, but depression is merely one stage on the path to progress: Denial, Anger, Bargaining (trying to find a loophole in the truth so as to evade its implications), Depression, Acceptance. Once we accept the truth, we can then devise a plan that will work in light of this truth we have accepted. Denying the truth means that our actions will be ineffective. Denying the truth provides temporary comfort, but long-term pain. All you are doing is setting up Lozoman to be a 30-year-old virgin, then a 40-year-old virgin, then a 50-year-old virgin, etc.


Great, now I'm more depressed and with little hope then ever before. Btw, I'm not a virgin. I've slept with at least three women. And Im not shy around women. The only reason I'm "shy" around them is because there unapproachable, and I fear that if I go up and talk to them, I will be coldly rejected and humiliated. If women were more approachable, I'd be more than happy to go up to them and talk to them.
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Re: Lets not kid ourselves. Women are the same everywhere.

Postby droid » Fri Dec 12, 2014 6:51 pm

lozoman wrote:Great, now I'm more depressed and with little hope then ever before. Btw, I'm not a virgin. I've slept with at least three women. And Im not shy around women. The only reason I'm "shy" around them is because there unapproachable, and I fear that if I go up and talk to them, I will be coldly rejected and humiliated. If women were more approachable, I'd be more than happy to go up to them and talk to them.
Excellent response to a shaming tactic. You'll see more approachable women once you make a move abroad, trust me. Oh, an let's not forget my main premise, in many places, the percentage of hotties is better, which only helps.
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
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Re: Lets not kid ourselves. Women are the same everywhere.

Postby MrMan » Fri Dec 12, 2014 7:14 pm

Lozoman, did you recently get dumped or cheated on?

All women, or most women, are hard to deal with at times. If you go through a stressful situation, instead of wanting to chill out like a man, they may want to talk and talk about it. They get all emotional about small stuff sometimes. They have periods once a month when they are young. They have difficulty compartmentalizing ideas and everything is connected. They have to make a conscious effort not to be controlling in a relationship.

Well, they aren't men. They are different. They are women. Some women are hard to deal with. But even the ones that are have a lot of positive traits. If you got sick, who do you want to take care of you, some dude, or a woman? Is some guy going to come into a room and brighten it up with his appearance? Little kids of either gender can be cute. But as far as I am concerned, no man is attractive in the whole world. None of them brighten up a room like a woman can. Just getting a hug from a woman can be a beautiful experience. I haven't even gotten to the topic of sex.

A woman who knows how to cook and clean the house and care for little children is also a real benefit to a man.

A woman with good, mature character, can be a great asset. She knows when to encourage, follows instead of leads and controls, making helpful suggestions rather than fighting to get her own way. Appreciation, respect, and sexual fulfillment from a wife is a valuable thing.

The problem we are seeing in the US is that fewer women value the characteristics that make them a good wife, diligence around the home, submission, respect, and commitment and enthusiasm to meet their husband's needs. In some cultures, women are raised to embrace these values. But they are still women and have a female emotional design that a man has to learn to appreciate, deal with, direct, and relate to.
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Re: Lets not kid ourselves. Women are the same everywhere.

Postby lozoman » Fri Dec 12, 2014 7:30 pm

MrMan wrote:Lozoman, did you recently get dumped or cheated on?

All women, or most women, are hard to deal with at times. If you go through a stressful situation, instead of wanting to chill out like a man, they may want to talk and talk about it. They get all emotional about small stuff sometimes. They have periods once a month when they are young. They have difficulty compartmentalizing ideas and everything is connected. They have to make a conscious effort not to be controlling in a relationship.

Well, they aren't men. They are different. They are women. Some women are hard to deal with. But even the ones that are have a lot of positive traits. If you got sick, who do you want to take care of you, some dude, or a woman? Is some guy going to come into a room and brighten it up with his appearance? Little kids of either gender can be cute. But as far as I am concerned, no man is attractive in the whole world. None of them brighten up a room like a woman can. Just getting a hug from a woman can be a beautiful experience. I haven't even gotten to the topic of sex.

A woman who knows how to cook and clean the house and care for little children is also a real benefit to a man.

A woman with good, mature character, can be a great asset. She knows when to encourage, follows instead of leads and controls, making helpful suggestions rather than fighting to get her own way. Appreciation, respect, and sexual fulfillment from a wife is a valuable thing.

The problem we are seeing in the US is that fewer women value the characteristics that make them a good wife, diligence around the home, submission, respect, and commitment and enthusiasm to meet their husband's needs. In some cultures, women are raised to embrace these values. But they are still women and have a female emotional design that a man has to learn to appreciate, deal with, direct, and relate to.


No, I've never been in a relationship or even dated a girl before. That's part of the reason why I am so bitter. They never even gave me a chance.
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