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Discuss dating, relationships and foreign women.
8 posts • Page 1 of 1
From my experience, based on women in my family, female friends, and past girlfriends, most of all the women I know seem to have crazy irrational temper-tantrums for some of the most mundane reasons. Admittedly, my mother is the worst I've experienced. It's like they look for a reason to be upset. It may be PMSing, but I've found that it can happen very spontaneously and unpredictably. And when they are upset, NOTHING you can do can diffuse the situation or calm them down. You think of all different kinds of things to say to deescalate the situation to no avail. No amount of logic and reason works. It's almost better to simply get up and leave the building, go for a walk or drive and come back a few hours later. I'm starting to wonder if I ever really want to live with a woman again.
Almost all of them will try you at least once, if they think you can't/won't impose a cost for them acting up.
не поглеждай назад.
"Even an American judge is unlikely to award child support for imputed children." - FredOnEverything
Do all women have temper tantrums?
I think so, all women. Missing self-control.
Regardless of age, relationship etc.
Even in Asia, here in Japan or Philippines - Thailand and China can be much worse.
Is the passive-aggressive/subtle communication of dissatisfaction a universal trait among women? Do women in Asia tell you why they are upset right off the bat or do they pout like children and just act rude when they are trying to communicate that there's a problem? That's the biggest issue I have. I can't tell you how many times I've had this happen:
Me: Are you alright?
Her: Yes yes, I'm fine..
Me: Oh, well you are acting different
Her: No I'm fine
...later in the day she switches from passive to aggressive and just unwinds on me about what she was upset about and didn't tell me. So far I haven't come across a woman who isn't like that
My wife has had a few, usually during arguments. She's more careful and in control about being respectful toward me, though, than in the past.
Temper tantrums are very rare, but there are times during PMS or when she's really tired when she can be irritable and grumpy and things like that. I wouldn't call those temper tantrums, and those are rare these days.
There are also times when a woman will get upset and cry when a man wouldn't. It's part of being a woman.
There are also times when my wife has been upset with me, during PMS or pregnancy or whatever it is, and says she doesn't want me to hug her. You stand or sit there feeling powerless to comfort. But finally one day my wife admitted that sometimes when she said she didn't want me to hug her, part of her wanted me to. But this kind of weird emotional stuff is kind of rare, these days. But when a woman is pregnant or right after, she can go through this kind of stuff quite a bit.
One thing that helps is not to depend on your wife's feeling about you as some sort of emotional validation for yourself. You need to be confident about yourself regardless of her emotions toward you, because they go up and down like the waves of the ocean. Be a rock she can depend on . To some extent, it helps to see a woman's emotional roller coaster like that of a child. If a child cries, you comfort. You can be empathetic without getting depressed if a baby cries. And if a toddler is angry at you, you don't take it personally. Kids have emotions like that. So do women. So put yourself in that frame of mind and just try to help her out of her emotional state.
Sometimes leaving the room is the best way, especially if emotions turn to criticizing you or she's lashing out at you in some other way. Let her calm down. Don't leave in a huff. Let her know you are giving her some space to work through her feelings or something like that.
If your wife really gets out of hand with temper tantrums, you'll have to set boundaries. Be emphathetic, but let her know you won't tolerate yelling, name-calling, hitting, throwing plates on the floor, or whatever it is. If I were married to a woman who hit me, I'd probably just grab her wrists and wrestle her down until she calmed down or stopped. That's crazy though. Try to figure out if she has an anger problem before marry her. That kind of anger problem is a reasonable standard for a deal breaker for either gender.
When my wife got angry once, she wanted to go drive around. I refused to let her go. For me, it was mainly a safety issue. I didn't think she was in the right frame of mind to drive.
All women can have a bad day or moment. This is true of all people. But believe it or not the child-like temper tantrum is not 100% standard in my experience. Some are saying you've got to set boundaries and keep your lady in check. I'm not one to advocate violence or physically abusing your partner. You can't let a woman get away with anything crazy or walk all over you, but if she is nuts sometimes it is best to just cut her loose. If the only other option is getting violent (or getting violent back), then just move on.