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Discuss dating, relationships and foreign women.
Filipinas or Chinese are best imho.
Chinese are better educated and of course is a better choice if you like white legs (like Winston does).
Filipinas are more down to earth.
China is good if you want to meet a lady over the age of 30 (the shengnu's).
It's easier to find work in China. It's easier to get a visa for the Phillies.
Many Filipinas speak English. Hardly anyone speaks English in China (except for saying "Hello").
Which cities in China would you advise Western men to visit? I have been told to focus on the Central coastal region not far from Shanghai. Is this true?
Per capita, for looks, I'd say east Asian women are probably better looking on average. Let's say you had a randomly selected group of 100 thin 23-year-olds, I'd probably think more east Asians were pretty. I'm thinking 'Malayu-looking' for Southeast Asia. But, of course, you can find that rare gem for looks anywhere. There are 9+ Southeast Asians too. It seems like South Korea had a lot of 7s and 8s for looks all over the place. On average, I'd say Indonesia is a point or two lower, just for my tastes in looks. I did end up with an Indonesian woman who fit my criteria for looks.
I tend to prefer long faces rather than wide ones, and a slender build over stocky, Indonesia is probably better for men who like wider, rounder body shapes than China or Northeast Asia. There are slender people with longer faces in Indonesia, too. It's just less common. Indonesian skin tones range from light skinned to very dark, depending on the people-group and who you are considering.
Culturally, I think Southeast Asia is better. My experience with Filipinos is with first and second generation immigrants to the US and expats in Indonesia. But I think an Indonesian or Filippina would be more laid back and used to dealing with someone from a foreign culture. I get the impression that Chinese and Korean women could potentially be more 'pushy' in the home. Koreans and Japans have rigid, inflexible cultures and ways of looking at things, which are foreign to outsiders. Indonesians and Filippinos would be more open to dealing with a heterogeneous society and may be more laid back and flexible when dealing with foreigners. Indonesia tends to have a mildly male dominated culture, or at least some of the people-groups do.
I can't say much from experience about Thailand. I haven't spent more than a few days there. I don't know about Vietnam, Laos, or Cambodia. Those languages are pretty far from English, and the women from there who speak English will probably have a really rough accent you'll have to put up with. They don't sound 'cute' to me. I'd think one of the other accents would be more endearing. Japanese or maybe Philipino or Indonesian may be more likely to have accents that sound cute and add to the 'foreign mystique' of the woman in question.
If you like Chinese looks and southeast Asian culture, there are Chinese Indonesians. Some of them tend to come from well-to-do families. They may have grown up with maids doing their cleaning and cooking for them, so they may not have been trained to do housework like a poorer or middle class local girl. I can't say I've seen a lot of 9+ Chinese Indonesians. One comes to mind. Another one looked Chinese, but she was mixed. I can think of a famous singer in Indonesia who I'd say is probably an 8 for looks, or was when she was younger.
For cooking, Indonesian food beats Filipino food. Indonesia has a lot of really good dishes if you get a skiled cook, but they aren't all from the same people-group's cuisine. A Padang/Minangkabau woman could cook those coconut milk curries which tend to be rather fatty with coconut milk. Manado food has some bold flavors and is very interesting. I think their porridge with the greens and tumeric in it is kind of gross, though. Some of the Manado women look more Chinese than anything else. They seem to be like Filipinos about spending too much on parties and fashion.
Javanese food is pretty good, too. If you can get a woman who knows how to cook different people-group's cuisines, that's a big plus, and in that case, Indonesian women are good for cooking.
Chinese is a good choice if you want a woman to cook for you. Japanese food-- some of it is okay. If you love raw fish, maybe you could go for a Japanese girl, if any of them know how to cook. I really like Korean food, but if you eat it a lot it gets boring. The flavors of so many foods are similar to each other-- leaks, red pepper, garlic, green onion, little fish. Thai would be good if you want a woman to cook for you, too.
Wow thanks that was some useful info there. My preference is Mainland China women I love the culture and their beauty. I haven't had the luck of hooking up with one. I met an amazing Vietnamese she looks East Asian. Her skin is pale white not yellowish like a lot of East Asians thin nose and round face if she hadn't told me she was Vietnamese I'd think she would be Chinese. I read somewhere that Vietnam geographically is located in SEA but it has EA culture and looks. I noticed Vietnam looks completely different from other SEA countries the culture and people almost look like China. I wonder if they have Chinese blood.
I'm near Shanghai now. Before that I lived in Guangzhou in the deep South lol.
The East is more prosperous and the air is cleaner. Shanghai is a money making machine and the money flows into the surrounding cities. There are an abundance of teaching jobs.
The local food is pretty good. I had some amazing tofu and shredded potatoes in my work canteen on Friday, and all for 2RMB. It's also really easy to buy imported goods here. I mostly live on pasta and kimchi.
I'd say the locals are a little less friendly than they were in Guangzhou. There aren't so many migrants as there were in Guangzhou either. Most of my students are locals.
The women here are stunning. Land whales are pretty much non existent.
Mandarin is widely spoken by youngsters, but when I go on the bus I've no idea what dialect the locals are speaking.
And yes, Vietnamese and Cantonese Chinese are distantly related - the languages are quite similar apparently.
Kinh Vietnamese are the dominant ethnic group in Viet Nam. If you're wondering why they look Chinese, it's because they originated in southern China. There's been a lot of Chinese-Vietnamese intermarriage throughout history, and Viet Nam has a large ethnic Chinese population. My online experiences with Vietnamese women didn't amount to anything, but there was one girl I had the most in common with and she was an ethnic Chinese with roots in Guangzhou. Vietnamese phenotypes range from completely southern Chinese looking to more SE Asian looking. The further south you go, the more SE Asian they tend to look but there are exceptions.
I do not have much experience with SE Asia, but when it comes to East Asian women I'd say mainland Chinese are the only group that's still relatively free from corruption and has enough good women left. The developed parts of NE Asia (Japan, South Korea, Taiwan, Hong Kong, Singapore due to its majority ethnic Chinese population) can be quite difficult due to high levels of Westernization, feminism, careerism and materialism. I wouldn't suggest living in those places. If you're a Japan-phile, I'm sorry. The social realities of life in Japan are grueling and modern Japanese culture (e.g. workaholism, extreme conformity) is definitely not for a deep thinking / feeling type.
I'd recommend that you choose mainland China, and most of all, ACT QUICKLY. China's under very heavy assault by corporate modernity and it's intensifying as I type. You cannot afford to wait. Find a woman when you're still young is what I'd suggest. It's an imperative. Even mainland Chinese women are becoming filthy in body, mind, and soul like their developed NE Asian and Singaporean sisters. Time is of the essence. This goes true for any foreign guy as well as a mainland Chinese guy. Mainland Chinese women at their best have a good balance of characteristics, but it's hard for me to describe.
If you choose SE Asia, I must say (though I don't mean to generalize), be prepared to deal with possibly more complex family politics. From my experience SE Asians are more 'collectivist' (I hate the word) than Chinese, and the opinions of their families may play a bigger role. This is especially true in countries like Thailand. Sure I find some Thai women physically attractive, but the cultural and intellectual differences are too great to overcome. My infatuation with Thai women ended as I learned more about aspects of their culture. I'm especially not a fan of how they take face to a whole new level (if you think East Asia's bad enough), and how their deepest loyalties lie with their family of origin rather than YOU as their spouse.
If you're a deep type like me, an INFP, struggling in the modern world is a given. It will be hard for you to relate to 95% of people beyond a fairly superficial and casual level. The world is changing faster than we can keep up with, so it becomes ever more crucial to secure the right life partner EARLY ON. I'd say no later than your mid-twenties.
INFJ checking in.
Yes face is a big thing in Asia but it's not as bad in China as it was in Thailand.
I sent a boy out of my class last week for bad behaviour. Cue for much loss of face all round but I was pleased at how the students handled it.
I find that teaching doesn't make me as tired as sitting in a cubicle coding for 8 hours a day. On the downside lesson preparation takes ages. Teaching is kind of front-loaded and after a while you can recycle more material and make lessons from practically nothing. Today I threw away the awful textbook and got half of the lesson out of 3 Halloween pictures I cut and pasted from Google Images. 10 monsters - name them all was really popular!
I've been chatting to some guys from the forum and we're pretty much in agreement that China is changing VERY rapidly indeed. As far as dating goes, that's not for the better. Wechat is full of xiaojies. Tantan is full of women seeking confirmation that they're hot (like Tinder in any Western country). Any good 30 something women already comes with a kid. So you have to support the kid and a family and have a woman who's losing her looks and no doubt heavily in debt. Is that a good deal?
The teens and 20 somethings are also very nationalistic and any lesson that looks at China in a bad light is not popular at all. Even when their textbook (published about 5 years ago) suggests they talk about issues such as green issues, fake goods and the failure of Chinese brands globally.
As far as lifestyle, I have more time and it's convenient to live in the school itself. I get a free apartment so financially I'm not making too much less than what I was in the UK.
I quite enjoy teaching and it's good to know that I could always return home and teach any number of subjects. However it's glaringly obvious that the CELTA ignores the most important thing of all - class discipline! My sister is doing a teaching Masters back in the UK and 70% of her time is spent on learning about class discipline! She also does a lot less teaching. By contrast I was thrown in the deep end and was teaching a 90 minute class of 45 students on my own on day 1.
Thanks for the replies from both of you. I am 31 years old living in Miami, FL. This place is a shit hole period but I can manage because work is close to home that I can go walking and although rent is not cheap here it is way cheaper than other cities in the U.S.. Women here are a waste of time period they like delinquents and a lot of gold diggers and stuck up women with an attitude on their faces that you can see from a mile away. The very very few good ones are married or taken.
About 5-6 years ago I had an experience that made me realize not all women in the world are like this and I wasn't the problem it is the local women they suck. I would go to a Chinese buffet with my friend to eat. And most of the girls working there as waitresses spoke only very very basic English all from Mainland China. To make a long story short 2 waitresses were hitting on me but later I found out it was only one of them that was interested but I went for the wrong one and got rejected because the one I went for her parents according to someone there wanted to choose the man for her. I went back looking for the other one but she had quit the place.
All I did to catch these girls attention was look and smile that was all I am and I was young too at the time I go to the gym I am in shape and I dress nice too bad that doesn't work with the local westernized women. So ever since then I've had this fascination with China and I've always liked Asian women in general before those events. I agree Japan is cool and all but it's so overrated it's not even funny I have a friend there teaching English he is miserable and depressed they are workaholics and the women are zombies.
So fast forward till now for the past 2 years I was online searching for an Asian partner I started with Thailand it is horrendous but still way better than the U.S. tho women are so fake, lying, deceptive and very very picky and very Westernized. I have talked to Xiongmao about this. Filipinas are very easy and down to earth but they are not my cup of tea and there is nothing from that culture I like. This leads to Vietnamese and Mainland Chinese women.
The Chinese women I have met online were great but none want to move here and I don't want to move to China because I take care of my 80 yr old father and let's be honest here China has some freedom you can't have in U.S. and vice versa but it's a communist country. The luck on the Chinese sites were average I'd say nothing crazy but 155% better than Thailand though. On the Vietnamese site was where I had the most luck a few gold diggers here and there but I had about 177 messages and I am an average looking dude.
But at the end of the day online dating sites suck people are there to waste each others time and if you are not living in those countries it's a waste of time unless you meet a girl that desperately wants to move here. So that lead me to plan B. Plan B was to do what I did 5-6 years ago hit up every damn Chinese restaurant or buffet known to man and hopefully meeting a girl here. But that's a lot of money to be wasted so I went to a few didn't see much I liked and the 1 place I did see a potential girl they would always sit me with other people across the other side LOL.
I use Wechat and Zalo I would do scans for people nearby I would get a lot of results but most of these girls never reply back the few that did led to nothing they would say a few words and that was it. A lot of gay men message you on there so who ever is gay I recommend using those apps lol. On Zalo I would get more girls replying back to me which made me think are Vietnamese girls more down to earth? But same scenario few words and that's it never heard from again.
That was until I decided one day at work to message a few girls and hours later I had one girl message me back I almost did not message her because her profile had no profile pic. We started chatting little by little and 3 days later she gave me her cell she lives a little less than an hour away from me. Shes 22 years old she has been here since age 13 but has not lost any traditional values from her country because she only works and hangs around Vietnamese people and is an American citizen she speaks English good but with a heavy accent. She is from Ho Chin Minh in South Vietnam. She doesn't look SE Asian shes very very white looks more Chinese. We both want the same thing in life she so mature for her age she has been through so much and only had 1 ex bf from Vietnam who she was supposed to marry but he cheated on her and had a baby with another woman.
So she says she will never date a Vietnamese guy again all she asks for is a good man who is nice to her and have a nice warm little family. So I dated her one week after I met her it has been going great a bit clingy though but oh well haha.
She doesn't care about my money or my status just wants a good person. So as Bao3niang says try to find yourself a partner and secure it I think I might have with this girl but let's see.
Pinay girls are fun and very friendly most of them are easier for me to communicate. Now some of the chinese girls i spoke with were cool but i feel a sense that i can't spiritually connect with them.
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Language has nothing to do with it. Its all about the vibe, chemistry, connection, frequency, etc. You can read others from their eyes, face and body language and energy field too. Only low IQ people who are simple and left brained and limited think language creates any kind of connection or disconnection. Its never been a factor for me.
He probably meant Chinese women were too cold and practical and not laid back enough for him. Its their personality. NE Asia is more cold and materialistic and uptight. Not as open, relaxed and laid back as SE Asia. So the vibe is very different.
Also NE asians arent going to joke around or be sweet or laugh. They are serious people and focused on practical matters only, not on love or passion. If you arent like that you will not connect with them. Big differences cause the disconnect. Not language.
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