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Nervous about becoming the father of my gf’s kids. Need advice!!!
I met a single mom of two from Colombia. We met on A Foreign Affair. Knowing the type of man that I am, I wouldn't really consider myself as “dad material.” I’m not really good with kids and I have zero experience in taking care of one.
After 2 years of communicating, I realized that she’s the one I wanna spend the rest of my life with. The problem is I’m not sure if I’m ready to be a father. I have so many questions going through my head. What if her children don’t like me? Can I even take care of one? What if her parents don’t think I’m the right person?
I’m getting older, and I’m not as physically capable as I used to be. I worry about my girlfriend and her children if the situation needs me to be the man of the house. Living arrangements are definitely at the top of the list if things turn out okay. I’d want her and her kids to live with me here in the United States. I’m worried her kids might have a problem moving to a foreign country.
I have already talked to her and her children over video call. They know that I’m their mother’s partner, but we don’t really know how things would turn out if we were under the same roof. I’m going to see her soon for the first time and tell her that I want to be a part of her family forever.
Aside from proposing, are there other things I should worry about? Is there some sort of tradition in Colombia I should know about regarding engagements? I’m desperate to get this done right and I’m really nervous! Any sort of help and advice will gladly be appreciated.
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Becoming a step-dad to these kids is a really big deal. Do they know their real father(s)? If they do how are they going to feel about leaving dad in Columbia so you can be their step-dad? There could be instant resentment.
Some single moms who get married take the side of their kids over the husband. If you get one of those situations where the kid is wild and you try to enforce some discipline and she won't go with it, you'lll have a situation on your hands. If you aren't 'dad material', really, just move on. There are a lot of other women out there.
It isn't just a matter of spending the rest of your life with this woman. You're committing to have these kids in your life for the rest of your life, too. They may be in the house for 15 or 10 years or whatever's left of their childhood, but you can expect them to be in your mother's life for a really long time.
How old are they?
You guys keep falling for this junk lol.
Gotta give some credit to this spammer-for-hire, he does his homework
*Protip: Introduce yourself to the forum before you start with the pitching
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
I married a Filipina single mom with two kids 5 years ago so I know what your going through. Kids from non-western countries tend to respect adult relatives more than American kids do that's been my experience. You can bring some gifts for your fiancée's kids to help break the ice when you first meet them.
The daughter was 16 years old and the son was 5 years old at the time we got married. The youngest considers me to be his dad and we get along fine. The oldest daughter has had drinking, drug and "daddy issues" and does not live with us anymore which I'm very happy about. I don't preach to her about her lifestyle problems and try to stay on friendly terms with her.
“Every time a President leaves the White House after two terms, there is a recession within the next year"
It could be A Foreign Affair scam. I missed the AFA part when I read it the first time. But I wonder if it is their spammer, why would he advertise about finding a single mom with two kids to get people to go to AFA? Why not say he's a 50-year-old man and he met a really beautiful 23-year-old emotionally healthy girl with no kids, an heir to a large fortune, who wanted to pay for his ticket over there to marry him?