Paying for dates

[Adama]

By the way, if a truthful survey could be conducted, I would bet that many successful couples hardly ever went on expensive dates, and probably lots of couples didn't actually go on "dates" at all until after they became couples. If you're talking scams, it could be the whole dating concept itself is a scam, at least before the people become a couple. Then it just becomes eating out. Lots of successful couples probably just hung out with each other, and money never or hardly entered into the picture. That was always my experience with women anyway.

As I remember it, dating women always led to failure (yes always), regardless who paid, if the "dating" (or rather eating out/going out) was at the beginning stage. Spending time together doesn't cost money.

Also, I don't think dating is about a demonstration of the man's wealth, earning potential or ability to support a woman. I don't think they relate at all. Some people might though.

[Zambales]

I think you're all on the right track but possibly have the wrong goal in mind. The way I see it, many men here are looking at the short term goal of not getting scammed out of a few dollars. That is a fine goal, but it seems this is not the ideal goal.

The ideal goal is to eliminate the scammers, not simply to evade getting scammed on a date or a few dates. Because even if a man manages to evade getting scammed in dating, keep in mind that if the woman is a scammer, she has multiple other tricks up her sleeve. In other words, you haven't weeded out the scammer. You've just evaded one of her scams. You will still have a scammer on your hand possibly, you just prevented the opportunity. It is just that you managed to wiggle out of one scam, but she will have others or she will think of others, if she is a scammer.

It might actually be better to let things come and go as they will. Sit back, and let her show you her whole heart. What direction does she want to take things? Why? Because if she does what comes naturally, if she turns out to be a scammer, then you can simply eliminate her. Rather than evading a few small scams in the beginning only to get royally scammed much deeper later on.

Just like if you lend someone $100 which they've promised to pay it back. If they don't pay it back, you've only lost $100, but also they've revealed their level of integrity and character. Money comes and goes. It is the person who needs to be evaluated. So I wouldn't worry so much about having to pay extra. Your goal is to determine whether this is a woman of character for the long run, not is she going to run up the bill too high for me.

From my perspective the first date or the first couple of dates are just the preliminary round. Plenty more detective work and furrowing still to be done.

You're correct about women having multiple tricks up their sleeves but you also need to consider the ones who aren't or don't wish to be manipulative like the clingy types and the one's with a trolley load of baggage from a previous relationship for example. It's just not about weeding out the materialistic me, myself and I individuals but eliminating the other ones who wouldn't fit well into a relationship and also the females who don't embrace your personality. There has to be a fairly high dosage of chemistry between myself and a woman for my interest to withstand otherwise the attraction dribbles away quite quickly..

[Zambales]

Also, I don't think dating is about a demonstration of ability to support a woman.

I have heard of a number of females mentioning a man's ability to support a woman but this wasn't in the current climate. It was a decade or so ago. Maybe they were more of a traditional persuasion. Nothing wrong with expecting a man to provide the necessities so long as it's not one-way traffic.
Support and materialism are completely different.

Also, I don't think dating is about a demonstration of the man's wealth, earning potential. I don't think they relate at all. Some people might though.

Yep, materialistic women!

[Master]

I pay for everything. Date, food, movie, taxi, hotel, her bills, her sons, her friends...

Its not a problem. To impress. I pay to get laid. Im in control. Also is a way to get to know the other person. How much they abuse that power, how poor they are, how much they respect themselves... latinas dont mind telling me to get them a car, gold, pay their bills. White women generally dont accept even half. They pay for their own stuff and see it as abusive for me to pay for much. They typically even feel guilty they are not inviting me. They might accept a gift or something but at a minimum. They respect themselves and hate the idea that they have to rely on me or that they are inferior so they have to accept it or that they are not equal. Even if they are dirt poor they will not accept it. They rather go if they like you or not at all. Money is no issue to me but I will never marry a poor woman. Ive learned through hardship how important that is. I need a woman who can support herself and has her own means regardless of who pays for dates and whatnot.

[SteveUKR]

I pay for everything. Date, food, movie, taxi, hotel, her bills, her sons, her friends...

Its not a problem. To impress. I pay to get laid.

You must have "WALKING ATM" painted on your back.

[Master]

what? Ass to mouth?

lol. No I just paint a target and when I decide I want to hit it nothing will stop me. But I make the ultimate choice on at where it ends.

[SteveUKR]

I pay to get laid.

Wow great accomplishment. Genius

[Master]

talk about out of content.

I dont mean i pay for sex. I mean when I decide to take a non prostitute girl out I wont let some women's misconceived notion of the man has to pay get in the way. If she feels I have to shower her with gifts and lavish her with luxury to appease to her vanity I will. Money is not a problem. Doesnt mean I am directly paying a working girl for sex.

[SteveUKR]

As someone said you pay for it one way or another.

You're just trying to use your money (if you really do have it) to bribe girls for sex. Nothing wrong with that. Many guys do it. You're telling us nothing new.

[Master]

A bribe is if I offer you money upfront for sex. I dont do that. I get to know them and I court them. If im still interested then I decide to take it further. Just because I pursue women doesnt mean they all sleep with me or I get to bang them on the first date. Its a process and if it was a bribe it'll be like picking them up at the local corner and just negotiating.

and yes steve urkel, believe me I do have the dough.

[SteveUKR]

believe me I do have the dough.

You sound like JohnDoeBigBaller

or maybe you're just a joker

[Master]

Im both.

[SteveUKR]

Jack of all trades. Master of nothing.

[Master]

Nothing=Everything

[xtravel]

Ffs, man up and pay for the date. And if you don't score by the 2nd date, man up and move on.