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Why a male feminist like me can't find an American girlfrien

Discuss dating, relationships and foreign women.

Moderators: jamesbond, fschmidt

Disco Joe, you are far too nice

Postby MatureDJ » Sat Mar 22, 2008 8:02 am

Your ad and follow-up make you look like too nice of guy. I could see fat chicks who would go out with just about any man being repulsed by those words. You need to tone it down.

Now as for picking up chicks, you should look for single's events like church dances - especially since you have no problem with women into their mid-40's. I would presume also that since you are sterile (why did you get a vasectomy anyway?), that you would not have a problem dating a single mother. There is your ticket - single mothers do not have such a hangup on men being too nice. In fact, single mothers actually would prefer a nice guy, since the jerk guy knocked them up.
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Re: Disco Joe, you are far too nice

Postby DiscoPro_Joe » Sun Mar 23, 2008 3:12 am

MatureDJ wrote:Your ad and follow-up make you look like too nice of guy. I could see fat chicks who would go out with just about any man being repulsed by those words.


Only in the goddamned American land of fictitious fakery and pernicious social paranoia could such a statement be so true.

As Winston has written eloquently in so many of his articles, Americans are so fake to each other so much, that they don't trust each other anymore and have become completely paranoid! This is especially true of American women.

In China where I'll be heading, bright colors are everywhere (it's part of the culture), people are much more discrete-minded (i.e., they take things at face value without trying to "read into" stuff too much), and they're far more trusting toward one another. Since I happen to be a Meyers-Briggs ISTP personality type, this is all a good fit for me. The Chinese also don't mind if strangers ask them what their salary, religion, and other "personal" traits are, and for the most part, neither do I. Most paranoid Americans have problems with this.

In China, I highly doubt there's such a thing known as "too nice of a guy," because the Chinese are discrete-minded and perceive a nice person as an inherently nice person. In America, people observe a nice guy and think, "Okay...what's his hidden agenda?" or, "He must be desparate or something!"

And in most non-American countries, any woman with physical features -- whom only a minority of men prefer (such as being pleasantly-plump) -- would be extremely flattered and grateful toward a decent-looking, single, male stranger who tells her that he uniquely likes her figure. She would take his words at face value and would feel extremely lucky.

American plump chicks' reaction to this: "Okay...what's your hidden agenda? You must be desparate. How dare you insult me like this!"

Only in fake, paranoid, fucked-up America do we regularly see shit like this. I can't wait to get out of here within the next two years.
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Postby Jackal » Sun Mar 23, 2008 3:20 am

MatureDJ, your post shows some true insight. Cyrus was trying to harden DiscoJoe for the blood-thirsty club scene, but I don't know if he's ready for that yet. I think your idea of those singles dances at churches and places is a great idea. 40-something women should be drooling over Joe.

DiscoJoe, all of us were just trying to help you out. Unfortunately American culture can be very cut-throat and shallow, and only hunters succeed here. I also get frustrated at times that when I truly let myself go and fall in love with American girls, the depth of my affection scares them away. It can be tiring to always act strategically cold to succeed in the American dating scene which seems filter out caring people.

Good luck with China. Just try and visit it first before you put all your eggs in one basket.
Last edited by Jackal on Sun Mar 23, 2008 3:49 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Disco Joe, you are far too nice

Postby jamesbond » Sun Mar 23, 2008 3:48 am

DiscoPro_Joe wrote:
MatureDJ wrote:Your ad and follow-up make you look like too nice of guy. I could see fat chicks who would go out with just about any man being repulsed by those words.


Only in the goddamned American land of fictitious fakery and pernicious social paranoia could such a statement be so true.

As Winston has written eloquently in so many of his articles, Americans are so fake to each other so much, that they don't trust each other anymore and have become completely paranoid! This is especially true of American women.

In China where I'll be heading, bright colors are everywhere (it's part of the culture), people are much more discrete-minded (i.e., they take things at face value without trying to "read into" stuff too much), and they're far more trusting toward one another. Since I happen to be a Meyers-Briggs ISTP personality type, this is all a good fit for me. The Chinese also don't mind if strangers ask them what their salary, religion, and other "personal" traits are, and for the most part, neither do I. Most paranoid Americans have problems with this.

In China, I highly doubt there's such a thing known as "too nice of a guy," because the Chinese are discrete-minded and perceive a nice person as an inherently nice person. In America, people observe a nice guy and think, "Okay...what's his hidden agenda?" or, "He must be desparate or something!"

And in most non-American countries, any woman with physical features -- whom only a minority of men prefer (such as being pleasantly-plump) -- would be extremely flattered and grateful toward a decent-looking, single, male stranger who tells her that he uniquely likes her figure. She would take his words at face value and would feel extremely lucky.

American plump chicks' reaction to this: "Okay...what's your hidden agenda? You must be desparate. How dare you insult me like this!"

Only in fake, paranoid, fucked-up America do we regularly see shit like this. I can't wait to get out of here within the next two years.


How true, American women are PARANOID of men! They think all men are potential murders, robbers or rapist! Maybe they get these ideas from all the negative news storys out there. People in America distrust each other and most people don't even know who their neighbors are! But aren't the people in Oklahoma at least a little different than most of the country. I read on the internet that the friendliest people in America are in Oklahoma according to surveys that have been done. Is that true Disco Joe? I was in Tulsa last summer and the people indeed did seem more open and friendly than the people here in Chicago. The women also seemed more approachable and friendly. Who knows, I might move there someday and get away the paranoid nutcases here in Chicago!

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Re: Disco Joe, you are far too nice

Postby DiscoPro_Joe » Sun Mar 23, 2008 4:09 am

jamesbond wrote:But aren't the people in Oklahoma at least a little different than most of the country. I read on the internet that the friendliest people in America are in Oklahoma according to surveys that have been done. Is that true Disco Joe?


Yes, they are more friendly. But they're also much more conservative (culturally and religiously). So unfortunately, this renders me romantically incompatible with more of the women here, compared to other parts of the country.

But in the other parts of the U.S., they're more paranoid toward men. Sheesh! :shock:
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Postby LukeSkywalker » Sun Mar 23, 2008 5:39 am

Winston wrote:Agreed. I tried to be a male feminist before too, thinking that women would bond with me, invite me into their camp, etc. but it never happened.


Winston Wu! Male feminist!? Winston, you can give away your money, but you should never give away your honor and pride!!
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Please, give us all a break...

Postby polya » Sun Mar 23, 2008 7:30 am

Hi, I'm really surprised many of you are commenting on superficial things like his clothes. I'm sure he doesn't wear the outfit in his myspace pics everyday! We're beginning to sound like 5 gay guys on queer-eye (which I think concentrate on the superficial at the expense of the "inside"). If it was as easy as buying a new outfit everyone would have their wife/husband by their 21st birthday!
****I know I keep saying this, but people have changed - they "want it all", they "won't settle for second best", etc. They really want to play games to increase their self esteem by rejecting everyone who isn't "perfect." Thus, I feel its a waste of time buying a new outfit, writing a new pick-up line or improving social skills. But, at least we can all have a happy Easter with chocolate (lol). :D
"Woman is a violent and uncontrolled animal... If you allow them to achieve complete equality with men, do you think they will be easier to live with? Not at all. Once they have achieved equality, they will be your masters." Cato the Elder
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Re: Please, give us all a break...

Postby Jackal » Mon Mar 24, 2008 2:31 am

polya wrote:Hi, I'm really surprised many of you are commenting on superficial things like his clothes. I'm sure he doesn't wear the outfit in his myspace pics everyday! We're beginning to sound like 5 gay guys on queer-eye (which I think concentrate on the superficial at the expense of the "inside"). If it was as easy as buying a new outfit everyone would have their wife/husband by their 21st birthday!


Well it's not gay if it gets you laid (by a woman)! The fact remains that people do judge each other by appearances, even in foreign cultures. People outside the U.S. might not assume quite as much about a person's character by his appearance but they still make some judgements--it's human nature.
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Postby Erasmus » Mon Jul 07, 2008 12:10 am

So you would still be a feminist if you had had great success with women? haha

I was reading another board a few minutes ago. They peg all of us men who go overseas for women losers who cant get AWs.

I prefer to think of myself as a man who could get AWs if he wants, but is too fed up with the low quality of women and the typical BS behavior they exhibit.

But everyone is going to categorize us anyhow.
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Postby E_Irizarry » Wed Jul 16, 2008 10:05 am

WWu777 wrote:...If you ask them out, you risk them telling the manager and get in trouble for sexual harassment. So you have to make friends with them first to gauge their interest....

Semi-correct you are. Even though you still can make "friends" with some of them first, you have woo them and mangina yourself in order for them to accept you.

If you ever succeed with her, the moment you try to fortify the rules, she'll bend and break some and if you resistant to following her lead anymore, she'll find another mangina whom will.

Also, she still can bring up sexual harrassment because her gurrrrrls did the same thing and got away with it.

WWu777 wrote:...Plus it's taboo in the states to date coworkers since most don't like to mix business with pleasure.

Very taboo. On the contrary, I myself included - know a plenitude of Latinos in the USA that "fratenize" on the job and the retention rate of dating and maybe marriage retains high among Latino co-workers in that regard.
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